Behind the Scenes at Wizbang

Ever read the Credits section here at Wizbang? It can be enlightening.

For example, no one here is identified as a “writer”, did you notice that? Instead, we’re either “Emeritus(for writers who have gone on and left the building) or “Editors(of whom some readers doubtless wish we would soon leave the building and go on to our final reward). But there’s no way anyone here would make me an editor for real.

Think about it. If you know me, you will be aware of my idiosyncrasies and predilections, which include a fondness for words that regular people can’t easily use in conversation. I’m talking about militant advocacy of enforced grammar – given the time and the opportunity, I’d be correcting verbiage, assigning punctuation, and razing the threads of dangling participles in a manner reminiscent of Conan the Librarian. I’d be revising articles and comments to suit a standard of loquacity not unlike those fiendish old ladies who insist on shaving half a poodle’s fur off and coloring it pink, then affixing a rhinestone collar and perfume before sending their canine out to see the other male dogs. I would vindictively demand historical context be applied (with footnotes) for all references to prior elected officials or events, and append commentary to any post with less than 1,500 words just to bring it up to size. And I, of course, am only one of the ‘editors’ here in this menagerie of wit, opinion, and inflammatory humor. There are ten other miscreants (OK, nine other malefactors and Lorie, who stays above the fray) who write in what is sometimes a blog-style search-and-destroy mission, a bit of a romp at other times, but with always a fair amount of chaos and Savoir Faire, which I think is French for ‘let’s see how much we can get away with’, which is often condensed into the popular curse word “Obama” these days.

This, of course, is why Kevin has assigned a Section Editor, Maggie Whitton. Maggie is the Sheriff round these parts, as well as the Judge, Lord High Executioness, and Anchor Person if we ever try to take over CNBC. In the event that we do take over a television network, look for me as a mix of Ben Stein and Spuds Mackensie, hawking documentaries about the rise of modern Frisbyterianism as a ‘must-have’, and decrying the pernicious growth of the Aluminati during the last decade.

Whatever we are, dowdy we are not.

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  • http://trailerparkparadise.blogspot.com Sabra

    It seems to be a rule of the internet that in any paragraph declaring yourself a proponent of proper grammar you will make a mistake; it is in that vein that I point out it should be “fewer than 1,500 words.” Chances are you did that purposely, I realize. Still, the Conan the Librarian bit is now my quote of the day.

  • DJ Drummond

    You’re right, Sabra, it should be “fewer”, not “less”. I’ve been around those supermarkets with “10 items or less” instead of “10 or fewer items” too long!

  • http://paulinhouston.blogspot.com Paul_In_Houston

    We all have our idiosyncrasies; I seem to have a lust for semi-colons, whether used properly or not; remove them from my toolbox, and I would be helpless indeed. :-)
    -

  • Stan25

    Frisbyterianism

    Is that like antidisestablishmentarianism?

  • http://www.savkobabe.blogspot.com Gayle Miller

    Here’s the scoop: I work for attorneys. In particular I work for one attorney. Nothing goes out without at least 4-10 edits to the documents, per day, for a week or more. I am tired of nit pickers and misplaced commas not to mention the improperly utilized semi-colons.

    One of my friends who works in a non-law-firm environment innocently (with a purpose) asked one day “Why do they call them “briefs?”. Good question. The thing is – attorneys know lots and lots of words and they like using all of them!

  • DJ Drummond

    Frisbyterianism (n) [cf Grady Nutt, circa 1975] The belief that when you die, your soul ends up on the roof and you can’t get it back down until the next big storm.

  • klrtz1

    I don’t mind the abuse I get for going off topic so here I go again.

    If Obama succeeds in borrowing so much money that the American government has to default on it’s debt, won’t that mean that no one will lend money to the American government and the American government will have to live on it’s income, i.e. taxes? Isn’t that one of the things conservatives want, a balanced budget? So shouldn’t real conservatives support Obama in bankrupting America?

    Wait, no, that’s a stupid question. Never mind.

  • Baron Von Ottomatic

    Dibs on the sports desk!

  • Jim

    DJ

    Are you using the royal “we” when you refer to dowdiness?

    You are light years ahead of your peers in terms of the quality of your posts. You Sir, are not dowdy, sadly the same cannot be said of your colleagues!

    Which is why I hope you have broken with protocal and used the royal “we”!

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