As rare as the whooping crane

January 15, 2012 | Filed under Attention Whores | Posted by

There was a time when you saw them everywhere.  Now they’re almost non-existent and as we head into this election year they’re conspicuous in their absence.  It’s depressing.  Frankly, America deserves better but doesn’t seem to have the stomach for the radical course correction needed.

Credible budget hawks?  Auto commercials that don’t include the syllable “eco”?  Truly conservative Republican frontrunners?  No, I refer to NFL players who perform their assignment on a play without acting like they just won the lottery.

Call me a crank, but does every tackle behind the line of scrimmage have to be followed by a defensive player sprinting twenty yards further beyond the line of scrimmage and posing like Hulk Hogan?  Must every catch beyond the ten yard marker be punctuated with some sort of exaggerated first down signal by the receiver?  Is there a halfback out there who can rip off a run longer than five yards without acting he just pulled Excalibur from a block of granite?

When did doing your job become a cause for exaggerated celebration?

Are these the times we live in?  What happened to America?  We’ve got a president who struts around proud-as-a-peacock over producing a form of identification.  We’ve got Kardashians running amok built on a foundation of one family member’s gigantic ass.  We’ve got a stupid TV show based on a stupid Napoleon Dynamite movie being advertised along side a stupid movie based on a stupid 21 Jump Street TV show.  What’s next?  The kid bagging my groceries breakdancing across the store because the eggs and bread aren’t smushed under the brisket when he’s done?

Am I supposed to believe a culture that tolerates celebration of the mundane possesses the fortitude to implement the course corrections necessary to address our looming economic collapse?  We are doomed, indeed.

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Posted by on January 15, 2012.
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Baron Von Ottomatic was voted "Most Likely To Spend Time in a Methadone Clinic" by his high school classmates.

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  • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_R7FMXY3DZP7JF7SGSPIOSLLXNE Stephen

    “We’ve got a president who struts around proud-as-a-peacock over producing a form of identification.”

    And we’ve got an anointed Republican (Mitt Romney) who the 1% have declared is the Republican Presidential nominee even though only 3 tenths of 1% of the Republican voters have cast votes in GOP primaries at this point.

    The 1% have decided it’s Mitt Romney. They’ve taken away the principle of American voters choosing their candidates.

    Corporations are people, and these people have a lot more money than you do – the the conservaties on the Supreme Court gave those corporations the power to choose the Republican candidate for President.

    And you’re complaing about football players posing?… amazing.

    • http://profiles.yahoo.com/u/EU5DQWQTTHTPO4A4ZYSL3AAV2U Adjoran

      ADD, or are you just stupid?

    • http://wizbangblog.com/ Baron Von Ottomatic

      Let me guess…our only hope for salvation is to nominate the guy who’s been in Congress for two decades yet hasn’t authored or passed a single piece of legislation to reduce the size of government – but did manage to successfully steer billions in earmarks to his home district.

    • GarandFan

      And EVERYONE knows that your Obamassiah NEVER took a dime from a corporation, right?  Wouldn’t know a Wall Street Lobbyist if he fell over one?  Holds meetings across the street from the White House so that no record will be kept.

  • http://profiles.yahoo.com/u/EU5DQWQTTHTPO4A4ZYSL3AAV2U Adjoran

    The old Texas coach Frank Royal used to discipline his players for celebrating too much in the end zone when they scored a touchdown.

    “Act like you’ve been there before,” was his instruction.

    It has become utterly ridiculous when any routine tackle is treated as if it won the Super Bowl – even when the ball carrier had already made a nice gain, hardly a victory for the defense at all.  But it is widespread now, even in college.

    Can you imagine a day at work if every single employee put on a celebration for just doing a part of his job?

  • Gmacr1

    They play a child’s game, they act like children.
    To bad they can’t be paid like children.

  • Commander_Chico

    Other countries aren’t any better in the trash-TV and dumb celebrity department, maybe even worse, and there’s nothing wrong with that.  Harmless amusement from looking at Kim Kardashian’s ass and Napoleon Dynamite is not the problem.   There’s nothing wrong with “celebrating the mundane,” because human life is mundane by definition.

    What “radical” course corrections are needed?  The US economy is large and still growing, albiet slowly and more and more owned by our creditors in China, Europe and Saudi Arabia.  These foreign oligarchs can now freely intervene in US elections through their ownership of putatively “U.S.” corporations.  Their interest, along with their buddies the U.S. oligarchs, is to plunder the land and extract wealth as quickly as they can for the next earnings reports, like locusts.  Infrastructure, the health, education and well-being of the American people are of interest to them only when they directly benefit.  The abstraction of “patriotism” is dead to this class, the Constitution only an obstacle to their authority.  They own both parties.  The U.S. military is of use to them to secure areas for resource extraction, as we see in Iraq and Afghanistan, both of which are now contracting with China and others to mine and drill. 

    Americans themselves are like spoiled children, demanding that they continue to consume more resources per capita than any other country.  Waste becomes a “right,” conservation is mocked.  Few submit themselves to the hardships and dangers of military service, yet the military is exalted – until it comes to paying for it and wounded veterans with taxes.  The media plays the populace like an organ, providing an illusion of difference and drama when in reality the decisions have already been made.

    The only salvation from this is individual, with the family, with your friends, and your local community.  The ascent of both Obama and Romney show that presidential elections are a puppet show.

  • Hank_M

    “We’ve got a president who struts around proud-as-a-peacock over producing a form of identification.”

    Hey, at least he does something well.