Wizbang Weekend Caption Contest™

It’s Friday, which means it’s time for the Wizbang Weekend Caption Contest™. Enter your best caption for the following picture:

wcc02072014

Winners for last week’s contest and this weekend’s contest will be announced Monday morning.

Update: Winners announced. Click the link to read the winning entry. The contest is now closed.

Shortlink:

Posted by on February 7, 2014.
Filed under Weekend Caption Contest.
Kevin founded Wizbang in 2003. He still contributes occasionally and handles all the technical and design work for the site.

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  • guido81_MA

    Jay, if you like your Doc Severinsen you can keep your Doc Severinsen, PERIOD!
    Ah, Mr. President, Doc Severisen hasn’t been on the Tonight Show since Johnny Carson retired.
    Doesn’t matter, Jay, I had no real intention of letting you keep him anyway.

  • GarandFan

    During the commercial break……………..

    Yeah Jay, Boehner is a real as……..er, is this mike on right now?

  • 914

    If only we could only switch which one is DONE!

  • guido81_MA

    On tonight’s show, our guest is a mystic from the east, Bar-Ack the Malevolent!
    And the answer is, “Nancy Pelosi, Chris Matthews and a Pickle”.
    The question, “Name me something that is plastic, something that is spastic and something that is Vlasic.”

  • Scorpion

    Psst, Jay. During the next break, could you put these pajamas on that I have back here so we can take a selfie together?

  • Rick Adams

    “Want me to have Sheila Jackson Lee draft an executive order to force NBC to reinstate your show?”

  • Retired military

    Leno’s last show had the biggest joke ever on it.

  • Retired military

    Leno “So switching to the affordable care act. Have you considered a career in comedy?”

  • Retired military

    The wrong person is retiring.

  • yetanotherjohn

    If Obama is on the right, then it has to be backwards from how things are normally seen.

  • Retired military

    One tells jokes. The other is one.

  • yetanotherjohn

    Wow, Hollywood really is to the left of Obama.

  • fustian24

    Do you think a shiver went up Jay’s leg?

  • fustian24

    Apparently, Obama has a thing for big chins.

  • westcoastwiser

    There Obama is; praising those who have lost their jobs and are now forced to enroll in Obamacare.

  • westcoastwiser

    Hey, Jay; any chance your joke writers can come to Washington and join my speech-writing team?

    • Paul Hooson

      You’re always one of the underrated great joke writers around here. Some others get more notice because they post earlier, but your jokes often contain a few real gems each week.

      • westcoastwiser

        Pays to have a bit of lunacy working for me, just like you; then again, like you, I’m a left-coaster.

        • Paul Hooson

          I’m Oregon, but just barely, right on the Oregon-Washington border. You’re California?

          • westcoastwiser

            Reno: former CA

          • Paul Hooson

            Reno is a fast growing city. I have relatives in Sparks. Used to love to fly down there a couple or more times a year to see the old Harrah’s Auto Museum and spend a day there.

          • westcoastwiser

            Barrett-Jackson has renewed for 2014 to hold their auction during HAN

      • westcoastwiser

        Serial hitech entrepreneur and trying to get another good deal going, but those with bucks are close to the vest… have to be alert and clever-of -the-mind…

  • yetanotherjohn

    Wow, I haven’t watched the tonight show in a while, but neither Johnny nor Ed seemed to have aged well.

    • Paul Hooson

      This joke is written in a David Letterman styled off-beat Twilight Zone manner. It’s a great joke. I hope more people look at and vote it up. It’s very good!

  • http://www.outsidethebeltway.com rodney dill

    Two and a half men…. and also the President.

  • jim_m

    If you thought I was stoned when I was in the Choom Gang, wait til you see my Costas interview

    • westcoastwiser

      Costas’ best interview was with an empty suit.

    • westcoastwiser

      Drink, drink, drugs, drugs… drugged the night before, need to get drugged tonight night so I can sleep on the floor !

    • Paul Hooson

      Holy Christ! Great one Jim!

  • http://proof-proofpositive.blogspot.com/ Proof

    ‘Jay, people are shedding tears of joy over your last day.”

    “Don’t worry, Mr. President. It’ll happen for you, too!”

  • http://proof-proofpositive.blogspot.com/ Proof

    The most powerful man in America with the first black president.

  • http://proof-proofpositive.blogspot.com/ Proof

    “So, Jay…tell me how you made it for 22 years without blaming Johnny?”

  • Par4Course

    One classy man retiring as a total success, the other crudely continuing despite abject failure.

  • cathymv

    Jay, I get a kick out of your jokes about me, Michelle and I laugh and laugh. The IRS gets a great kick out of those jokes too. They think its sooo funny, they are going to give you a visit real soon to talk!!

  • Rick Adams

    Lantern jaw, meet glass jaw.

  • westcoastwiser

    Obama: Jay, have you ever been to San Marino?
    Jay: No
    Obama: Good; I’m going to name you Ambassador now that we’ve established diplomatic relations with the Most Serene Republic of San Marino. You’ll like it there. They have 18 national holidays, plus you’ll get the standard 10 US holidays and a one month vacation, twelve paid trips back to the USA every year, and your health insurance is paid by my office.

  • Paul Hooson

    When you fire your top ratings draw TONIGHT SHOW host you hire a lightweight replacement….
    When you hire a lightweight replacement, you look to SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE…
    When you look to SATURDAY NIGHT, you Forget How Chevy Chase Failed as a late night host ….
    When the former SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE member can’t pull decent enough ratings, you beg the original TONIGHT SHOW host to come back again….
    When you have to beg, you become a pathetic beggar….
    Don’t become a pathetic beggar, NBC….

  • westcoastwiser

    I’m guessing that Obama failed this interview to replace Leno as host of the Tonight Show; a requirement was that he have talent – NOT!

  • westcoastwiser

    Jay, I’ve got to ask for your help. Every time my picture appears on the Wizbang Weekend Caption Contest, I get really trashed by those commenting. Perhaps you could start commenting on the Wizbang blog site to help my image. I’d ask that you use the posting name of Paul Hoosan or saraconner3. Those names are close enough to other bloggers that people could confuse you with them. The names have been reserved for you with any easy password: gotohellyoucreep.

    • Paul Hooson

      HA HA!

  • fustian24

    Just between you and me Jay, I’ve been stoned out of my gourd since I became President. Soros and his people do all the work. I just play golf and read the teleprompter. It’s a sweet gig!

  • fustian24

    No Jay, it’s the REPUBLICAN wealthy I’ve been after. My good New York banker friends and you Hollywood guys are still golden, of course!

  • fustian24

    No Jay, I would never dream of using the NSA or the IRS to advance my personal agenda.

    But if it were for the good of the country, wouldn’t I be remiss in not using all of the tools at my disposal?

  • fustian24

    If you were a REPUBLICAN, I might ask how many cars does one man really need.

    But you’re not……..right?

    • Paul Hooson

      One vote up for a car joke!

  • fustian24

    No Jay, how is a Sochi toilet like Obamacare?

    “Both of them are socialist disasters and neither of them is worth a crap!”

  • yebbasue

    Hey Jay! I’m gonna be out of a job soon too. Maybe we can work up an act and go on the road together – you’ve used me as your straight man before?

  • cathymv

    Jay Leno is wishing that the chair next to him was really empty – it would have been funnier

    • Paul Hooson

      Yeah, but that would only a Clint Eastwood comedy shtick….

      • howdi rowdi

        Paul, you amaze me with your witty wit. You’re so funny. Sincerely.

  • howdi rowdi

    Hey, Jay, what’s my schitck?

    • Paul Hooson

      Answer by Jay: “It’s not politics…”

  • howdi rowdi

    Mr. President, when did you learn Yiddish?

  • howdi rowdi

    After all those fingers pointing at me about obamacare, i didn’t resist pointing my finger at President Putin.

    • Paul Hooson

      Sounds like a recipe for a Mexican stand-off pointing….

  • yetanotherjohn

    So Jay, I issued an executive order that Wizbang can run their caption contests, but that they can no longer declare a winner. It’ll drive those tea baggers crazy.

  • westcoastwiser

    Hey, Jay, do you think Kevin has lost his password to Wizbang and can’t post the results?

  • yetanotherjohn

    You know Jay, I have always been about religious freedom, so I have issued an executive order that all American’s may worship me freely. Of course, those who don’t want to worship me can discuss their reservations with the IRS who will look into things without a smidgen of corruption.

  • yetanotherjohn

    You know Jay, I have always been about religious freedom, so I have issued an executive order that all American’s may worship me freely. Of course, those who don’t want to worship me can discuss their reservations with the IRS who will look into things without a smidgen of corruption.

  • Paul Hooson

    A few days after the show, Jay leno and Obama talk over the phone:
    “How was you day, Jay”
    “Well, just getting used to being retired. Slept in late. How was your day Mr. President?”
    “People still dislike me. I try my hardest, but it’s those typical second term blues. Oh, looks like we’ve got a conference call with Paul Hooson. How’s your day Paul?”
    “Oh, the same old grind. Open the strip club. See women naked anytime I want. Get a BJ from my girlfriend in my office. Just the same old grind, you know…”

  • Paul Hooson

    Jay Leno: “Shirley Temple died”.
    Obama: “Yeah, thanks a lot Dr. Conrad Murray!”

  • Paul Hooson

    Jay: “First Phillip Seymour Hoffman, then Shirley Temple, now Sid Caesar…”
    Obama: “It sounds like Dr. Conrad Murray is going for a trifecta….”

  • westcoastwiser

    Mystery solved: Kevin’s busy travel schedule has kept him away from the web site. Two weeks ago he was in the Ukraine, then last week he was in Burbank. I wonder where he’ll be this week? Sochi? He’s a frequent flyer mile junkie.

  • http://wizbangblog.com Kevin

    Update: Winners announced. Click the link to read the winning entry. The contest is now closed.