Hillary Sets New Legal Standard of ‘Vast Majority’ To Excuse Breaking Law

Hillary Clinton said a lot of specious things during the Tuesday press conference where she was forced to answer to why she used a private email system instead of the proper government email when she was Secretary of State. But one thing she said was important because she essentially set a new legal standard of “almost” fulfilling the law and maintained that it excused her for violations.

During her press conference, Hillary essentially maintained that she *almost* obeyed the law and since she *mostly* did, why, heck, she should be excused for any further violations.

Here is what she said during her presser:

Second, the vast majority of my work emails went to government employees at their government addresses, which meant they were captured and preserved immediately on the system at the State Department.

See, America. Since she gave “the vast majority” of her emails to the government, why, that must mean she is off the hook.

It doesn’t matter if any of that “vast majority” was relevant to the most sensitive emails being sought. It doesn’t matter if those emails that are important and hold key information fall outside of that “vast majority.” No, the fact that she gave *most* of the emails to the government is all she needs to satisfy the law.

Hillary has just set a new legal standard of “the vast majority.” Going forward in America you will now get credit for being mostly law-abiding, sort of following the law, almost legal, kind of correct.

America, we no longer have to do our utmost, we no longer have to fulfill every last requirement to be hailed as “the smartest person in the world.”

“The vast majority” of anything is now good enough to escape any punishment or blame.

Hillary’s is now the legal standard you can use in your own private life from this point forward.

Try these new legal defenses at home:

  • Gee, Internal Revenue Service, why, I paid “the vast majority” of my taxes, so I should be excused from paying the remainder.
  • Heck, officer, I have obeyed “the vast majority” of the speed limits, so I don’t deserve this ticket.
  • But, teacher, I got “the vast majority” of these answers right, so I should get an automatic “A” on this test.
  • But, boss, I have been on time for “the vast majority” of my clock in times, so you shouldn’t ding me for being late today.
  • But, honey, I haven’t had sex with “the vast majority” of women, so you must excuse my mistress (Bill has already used this one, apparently).
  • But, your honor, I haven’t killed “the vast majority” of people, so one murder is no big deal… is it?

I am hopeful you won’t ever need that last excuse, but, you know, it’s there just in case.

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