The Bonfire of the Vanities returns bloated and swollen with entries. The motto this week is "Bigger Is Not Necessarily Better." This weeks entries prove that elective cosmetic surgery has a place in the blogosphere. As an added bonus we've got all form of man and beast entries this week as well. All of this weeks entries have been gladdy offered up to the raging inferno that is the Bonfire...

If you want to be reminded to enter the Bonfire each week via e-mail, subscribe to the Bonfire mailing list. If you want to slash up your blog like a deranged mental patient you're in good company, stay a while until the meds kick in...

Scalpel please...

Fritz ponders an extreme makeover. Here is an exclusive "after" picture…



Heather is going on and on and on and on about something…. Punctuation be dammed is always Bonfire worthy. Alas it is merely a 3 on the Den Beste scale (measured like earthquakes).
Phelps answers the age old question, "If a fisking is performed on a piece of wood, does anyone read it?"
Anastasia is looking for love in all the wrong places, looking for love in all the wrong places, whoa whoa…
Jack is looking for answers in all the wrong places… Hint: Anastasia is single…
Patrick notes that looking at breasts is never inappropriate, as long as you maintain eye contact.
Nick proves that animal blogging is always an adventure, especially when you venture outside the familiar territory of dogs and cats.
Sean finds that on a slow news day even the banal can be boring.
John proves that rattlesnakes and lizards are protected minorities under federal law. He manages this in a mere 1364 words and dozens of pictures. He scores a 6 on the Den Beste scale, so we'll see you back here Thursday when you are finished reading…
Harvey is chumming for troll-sharks, getting only clown-fish. Hey, that's no way to talk about other Bonfire participants like…
Susie, who servers up a double dose of blogging cocktail weenies. Too bad there were none left at the party.
Jennifer, Bonfire annointed Queen Of Suck, is not going to relinquish her crown without a fight. A short history of bestiality is enough to convince the Gods of the Bonfire that she is serious about her crown.
Kin's back! Too bad the flight suit wearing George Bush isn't.
Bryan is "all man." Only manly men ponder the fate of other manly men... (Note: Permalinks are perpetually hosed… Search for Brawny)
Jim introduces a fascinating new game "Six Degrees Of Kevin Bacon", you'll have to read the post to comprehend this game. Too bad we don't have this measure in the blogosphere… My bad we do, and Jim is 843 degrees removed from Glenn Reynolds.
McGehee will be here all week, don't forget to tip your waitress.
Alex manages a rare feat, a review worse than the awful movie being reviewed. Bravo!
Pete is finding Democrats under rocks and sucky posts, coincidence? I think not…
Kiril pulls back the curtain on the process of professional writing. The results are somewhat akin to witnessing a C-Section delivery…
The King of Fools proves that you can judge a post by throwing it in the water and seeing if it sinks. If it doesn't sink then you are allowed to bring it here to the Bonfire.
Joe provides this week's lesson in how to write a pretentiously bad post. First begin with some obscure book references and quotes. Then make an immediate transition that fails to, well, transition. Next let the post drift and sputter aimlessly. Finally, end with a question no one really cares to answer.
Owen wishes to assure Bonfire readers that he has enough crappy material to put InstaPundit out of business (on a volume basis). Bring your tissues when reading this one, as you will be crying in pain to make it stop…
nikita loses his posting privileges at Eschaton with this one.
Brian issues the *wink* light blogging alert. I would make some subtle innuendo about fulfilling marital duties, but there was a new episode of Enterprise on that night…
I've been waiting all day for this.... This post isn't so lame, but this, this, this, this, and this are pretty much define a circle jerk, or a circle of jerks depending on your point of view.

Want To Join?
E-mail a link to your worst post of the week and include any extenuating circumstance, humorous commentary, or self serving excuse for your pathetic post. Get your entries for next week's edition to me via e-mail (Note the new address - bonfire at wizbangblog dot com) by midnight EST Monday November 3rd. Need a reminder? Subscribe to the mailing list.

Guest Bonfire Editor Next Week
Due to my hosting duties for that other link festival (Carnival of the Vanities) next week, the Bonfire may be hosted at another site. I'm working through the volunteer list to find just the right host. Entries sent to the bonfire at wizbangblog dot com address will get to the guest editor.