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It's A Guy Thing

Several years ago, a friend of mine (male, of course) asked me two simple questions. The first question was, "do you find it sexy when you see a woman with a ponytail hanging out of a baseball cap?" I answered yes. He then asked, "Why?"

I had absolutely no idea why. Neither did he.

Since then, I've asked many other men (well, other straight men) that question, and they all came up with the same answers. It seems to be a universal guy thing. All of us agree, but none of us know why.

Any theories out there?

J.


Comments (25)

I think it's because a guy ... (Below threshold)

I think it's because a guy likes to see a woman into "guy stuff" since it happens so infrequently. After being dragged into countless craft fairs and Yankee Candle stores, a woman in a ball cap is a refreshing change.

Take cheerleaders for example: aside from the fact that it's a scantily clad attractive woman (which would be enough), it's a woman who supports sports, and I think that adds to the appeal.

It's like if I meet a woman who likes Spinal Tap or the Marx Brothers, it's a bit of a turn-on.

Well, since you asked me pe... (Below threshold)

Well, since you asked me personally, I don't think a woman with a ponytail hanging out of the back of her hat is sexy.

But then, I'm a big homo, so....

However, I thin Katie Holmes (Dawson's Creek) is hot. I don't know what that means about me though.

I have two answers, not nec... (Below threshold)

I have two answers, not necessarily mutually exclusive.

One: tomboys are mad sexy. Period. I mean, I know that begs the question of why tomboys are sexy; for that one, I have no insight. (Except to say that maybe it's our instinct for selecting a mate. Tomboys are athletic and scrappy and those are both pretty good survival traits. Give me a girl with a ponytail and a hockey jersey who comes over to the couch at halftime on Thanksgiving with a football tucked under her arm and asks if I wanna shag the pigskin for a few minutes... woof.)

Two: for me, it's an association thing. The first time I ever saw a girl wear a baseball cap with a ponytail out the back I was 17 years old and a freshman in college. It was the first day of the fall term, and I was walking across the main campus quad. Along comes this gorgeous brunette in a sorority tee shirt and a black baseball cap with a ponytail hanging out the back of it.

It took about fifteen minutes for me to realize that all the sorority girls were wearing caps with ponytails, but by that time the association was firmly planted in my mind. To this day, ring that bell and I salivate every time.

It should be a testament to how thoroughly conditioned I am that I can recite the story of the first time I saw a girl with a cap and a ponytail at the drop of a hat.

Katie Holmes makes me very,... (Below threshold)

Katie Holmes makes me very, very uncomfortable because she's like 43 years old now and she looks 17.

Somewhere in an attic there's a painting of Katie Holmes getting older by the day.

One: tomboys are mad sex... (Below threshold)

One: tomboys are mad sexy. Period. I mean, I know that begs the question of why tomboys are sexy; for that one, I have no insight.

I think it goes back to when we were all too young to be seen as "liking girrrrlllls!" Tomboys were a kind of girl we could get away with hanging out with because they were into climbing trees and playing baseball instead of dolls and tea parties.

And as any woman will tell you, us guys never completely grow up.

Being a 62 year old geezer ... (Below threshold)
Ray Marshall:

Being a 62 year old geezer and having no business paying attention to young women wearing whatever, I do find that woman wearing baseball caps, pony tail or no, are extremely sexy.

Ray
Minneapolis

It is an association thing.... (Below threshold)
George:

It is an association thing. We associate ponytails to young girls. I believe it is the very same reason we like slim girls.

I put it down to a modified... (Below threshold)
Jumbo:

I put it down to a modified hardwired impulse. Have you ever bred horses? No, I don't mean YOU, I mean owned horses you bred, or seen it, etc. When the mare is in season and she catches the scent of the stallion being led toward the breeding stall (just enough room generally for the two of them front-to-back, no turn-around space, because it could get dangerous if they were fully free to move) she'll rip and snort, and then when she's ready, she raises her tail to say (in equine love-talk), "Take me, you hunka hunka burnin' love!"

The thing is, when the mare raises her tail, it looks a whole lot like the way a ponytail comes up and out of a hat. (Please, this is a scientific quest, so no snickering from those immature ones in the back!)

Okay, we're on the African veldt, right? We''re surrounded by zebras and wilderbeest and Cape Buffalo, and we take notes, okay. After hundreds of generations it becomes imprinted, innate knowledge.

So when we see a ponytail-through-the-hat girl, hundreds of thousand of years of close observation and animal husbandry come flooding back, without our realizing it, to tell us that she's ready for us to mount.

It's as good as anything else.

For me its a lot simpler th... (Below threshold)

For me its a lot simpler than that. A girl in a baseball cap and poneytail says to me that she is comfortable with herself , confident without a need to get all dressed up and fun... That is what it says to me, and I have been known to be a fairy good judge of women.

For me, its a horse things ... (Below threshold)
McCain:

For me, its a horse things all the way. I dig the track, and I dig the horses on the track, and well, anything that reminds me of a horse on a track really rocks.

Jumbo wins. It's definitely... (Below threshold)

Jumbo wins. It's definitely a sign of sexual readiness.

Man, how pathetic does it make me that Jumbo's post got me a little worked up? ;-)

And if they can light a far... (Below threshold)

And if they can light a fart....color me smitten...

[/kidding]

I think the "tomboy" theory... (Below threshold)
-S-:

I think the "tomboy" theory is right here.

I'm a female and a heterosexual and was always one of those "tomboys" -- could outrun and outjump and outswim most of the boys throughout my childhood, collected and built toy boats, took lifeguard training (and passed) (a teen, not an adult as to qualifying age and ability), drove a car fast and very well, really loved (and still do) automotives, things like that -- and yet I literally had to fight guys off with a stick most of my later teens and twenties and thirties and...
those I didn't have to fight off with a stick were always my closest friends (I know, I've heard that you're never really, really friends but my closest friendships have always been with men, and not intermingled with sexuality). Saying here, that, as a child "tomboy," all my closest friends were boys. And later in life, all my closest friends were men. Still are.

And, I do wear baseball caps with my ponytail, but I wear a bow or nice ribbon on the hair at the back of the cap...

I think it puts men at ease. Women will condescend when you aren't "dressy" and all made-up and high-heeled and the like, but, I don't dress for other women.

I'm all for David's theory.... (Below threshold)
Kin:

I'm all for David's theory. If a girl can look sexy in a baseball cap and sweats then she's gonna look sexy when you roll over at 4 in the morning and she's pushing 45.

The thing is, when the m... (Below threshold)

The thing is, when the mare raises her tail, it looks a whole lot like the way a ponytail comes up and out of a hat.

I can't wait to read your explanation for why men find the scent of vanilla sexy.

A lot more men knew tomboys when they were little, than ever watched a mare in heat and thought, "Oh yeah, I want me some of that!"

Because she has hair. I th... (Below threshold)

Because she has hair. I this day and age, the crown of beauty provided free to women is becoming more and more rare. Pretty sad.

"A lot more men knew tomboy... (Below threshold)
Jumbo:

"A lot more men knew tomboys when they were little, than ever watched a mare in heat and thought, 'Oh yeah, I want me some of that!'"

Hmmm. I sense rascals and blackguards making free with my area of, uh, scientific expertise. *Ahem*, as I said, it's an inherent, hardwired thing, quite independent of personal experience.

Besides, I MUCH prefer a world view in which girls with ponytails through their baseball hats are saying, "Hit me, bubba!"

This comment was too long, ... (Below threshold)
LF:

This comment was too long, so I just made a post. Y ou can find it here. You go look now!

Plus Vampires!

Are all women with baseball... (Below threshold)
Chris Yates:

Are all women with baseball caps and ponytails attractive or does it so happen that the women you're imaigining here are athletic, shapely, and are communicating a shared interest to you direct from your high school/college female sports fantasies? What if it were a hideous obese troll with a MLB hat on?

The hat and long straight hair isn't the point here so much as it's iconographic of a hot sports girl who will drink beer and watch games with you on the couch. While all of the Estee Lauder makeup, clothes that flaunt and hide at the same time, push up bras, high heels and all the other tricks of the trade do work to make a given woman deceptionally physically and sexually attractive it's also is formulaic and too common. The tomboy sports girl is shiksa appeal.

Going farther, men and women both frequently feel gender oppressed as one female commenter already noted here. Guys and girls both would rather not wear blue and pink uniforms all the damn time. Simularily men do like to wear more elegant and interesting nonutilitarian designs when given the license to do so and not be scorned as "gay". Women frequently find men whom are not starring in their own macho action movie everyday more attractive as well because they're confident and playful with their own sense of gender expression. Gender is fun and sexy to experiment with and what this thread represents is people avoiding it at their own peril while longing wistfully from the sidelines.

Somewhere in an attic th... (Below threshold)
rick:

Somewhere in an attic there's a painting of Katie Holmes getting older by the day.

Heh he he... We'd just better hope that she does not look at it!

"Going farther, men and wom... (Below threshold)
Jumbo:

"Going farther, men and women both frequently feel gender oppressed .."

Maybe it's just me, but I feel like somebody just pushed the "no more fun" bitton.

Simularily men do like t... (Below threshold)

Simularily men do like to wear more elegant and interesting nonutilitarian designs when given the license to do so and not be scorned as "gay".

That's true, but in fact such men are no longer scorned as "gay." Now we scorn them as "metrosexuals."

Seriously, there's a word missing from the excerpted sentence. It should have read: "Simularily some men do like to wear more elegant and interesting nonutilitarian designs when given the license to do so..."

I much prefer, and religiously renew at every opportunity, my license to wear blue jeans anywhere I damn well please.

Although admittedly they do have that fancy stitching on the back pockets...

I think womens necks are yu... (Below threshold)
yummy:

I think womens necks are yummy, baseball hats are just one way of giving a better view.

Wow, I watch football and k... (Below threshold)
Eclipsegurl:

Wow, I watch football and know about first downs and quartback sneaks, scrambling or staying in the pocket. And baseball with the RBI's, step and drive and waiting on your pitch. I didn't have a clue that guys found that to be a turn on. And now to find out that my ponytail dangling through the hole in the back of my UNC baseball cap could be turning on guys too. I can't imagine what they'd do if they knew that I lounged around in an oversized football jersey or cut off athletic department t-shirt. I don't call it sexy, just comfortable.

I enjoy watching Moster Garage and Orange County Choppers and college football on the weekends. I drive a fast car and love it. I wouldn't call that sexy either, just being diverse.

So, I guess I need to pay closer attention to what I wear and what I do and what I watch. I wouldn't want to be responsible for any spontanious conbustions. LOL.

Are there any suggestions about a girl's sense of humor that I need to know about?

i wouldn't call myself a to... (Below threshold)
Karmen:

i wouldn't call myself a tomboy but im a avid sports fan. as a matter of fact i wanted to be a sports analyst for fox sports. i love football college football basketball and baseball. i enjoy playing madden nba live and other exciting sports games. but at the same time im 100% woman. im very in tune with my feminine side. i always thought this would be a dream girl for a man but i see that some men can't handle it. why? im very compassionate, affectionate and romantic. im an attractive african-american woman highly-educated and going places. so u tell me what's up




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