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Weekend Caption Contest™

It's Friday, that means it's time once again for the Wizbang Weekend Caption Contest™.

Democratic presidential nominee John Kerry comforts Ray Raschilla Jr., a locked out worker from a local plant, at a Town Hall meeting in Austintown, Ohio, October 3, 2004. Raschilla is one of hundreds of workers at RMI Titanium that have been on the picket line for almost a year. (Jim Young/Reuters)


Update: Winners announced. Comments are now closed.


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Comments (142)

Yeeessss, that's the sugar.... (Below threshold)
Rob:

Yeeessss, that's the sugar. Quickly now, Teresa isn't looking. And don't you say a word to Edwards.

"Can you call in sick?"... (Below threshold)
Clay Jarr:

"Can you call in sick?"

Don't ever let go of the dr... (Below threshold)

Don't ever let go of the dream comrade.

Thought bubble: "Hmmm, m... (Below threshold)

Thought bubble: "Hmmm, maybe this gay marriage thing isn't such a bad idea after all."

Let me show you how we did ... (Below threshold)
Sean:

Let me show you how we did it in Vietnam.

"Umm.. Senator? I hope that... (Below threshold)
Anthony Leonson:

"Umm.. Senator? I hope that's a pen in your pocket..."

GEE THIS FEELS KINDA LIKE M... (Below threshold)
HOTROD:

GEE THIS FEELS KINDA LIKE MY EXPERIECES OF BEING A GOOD ALTARBOY

"You are HEALED by the powe... (Below threshold)

"You are HEALED by the power of the diety of your choice, or your own inherent abilities if you are an Athiest. This is not meant to imply the endorsement of one religion over another, or of religion over Athiesm or Agnosticism. What we call "faith" may simply be an unconscious mechanism by which the body's own immune system and self-healing properties effect what appear to be miraculous cures."

Initiating Compassion Mode.... (Below threshold)

Initiating Compassion Mode. Click...whirrrrrr...Engaged.

Eyes closed: Check.
Forehead wrinkled...engaging servos, enabling wrikles: Check.
Left hand naturally half-way between neck and shoulder...squeezing firmly, but manly: Check.
Right hand patting firmly, gently, yet manly: Check.
Humming the KD Lang version of "At Last"...WTF???
Begin nibbling ear: Warning...wrong location, wrong program...reboot and save for San Fransisco.

with all apologies to the g... (Below threshold)

with all apologies to the good citizens of San Fransisco

DEVIL! I COMMAND YOU TO REL... (Below threshold)
Matt:

DEVIL! I COMMAND YOU TO RELEASE THIS MAN'S SPIRIT FROM THE EEEEEEEEEEVIL REPUBLICANS! IN THE NAME OF JOHNNY, AMEN!

"Teresa, I know it's not th... (Below threshold)

"Teresa, I know it's not the best haircut you've ever had, but I still love you"!

I am so sorry, Guido. I nev... (Below threshold)
Matt:

I am so sorry, Guido. I never expected that you'd break a nail when you attacked the Bush/Cheney Headquarters.

Unholy Union... (Below threshold)
Rodney Dill:

Unholy Union

thank God Bush is going to ... (Below threshold)

thank God Bush is going to win and we'll be safe...

"Thank god for my little bl... (Below threshold)
Rodney Dill:

"Thank god for my little blue friends. And I don't mean the color of the states on the Electoral College map."

DONT TELL THERESA ANYTHING ... (Below threshold)
HOTROD:

DONT TELL THERESA ANYTHING ABOUT OUR SPECIAL SECRET.......OH I MEAN ITS OK TO FLIP FLOP

Is it wrong for a man to sl... (Below threshold)
Phil Count:

Is it wrong for a man to slow dance with another man? I don't think so!

(Whispered) "You just keep ... (Below threshold)
Biff:

(Whispered) "You just keep the money rollin' in and your family won't get hurt... You know I could snap your lowly blue-collar neck like a dry twig at any moment--learned that in Nam!"

"No, No Senator you misunde... (Below threshold)
Rodney Dill:

"No, No Senator you misunderstood me. I said I wished you HHHappiness."

I knew it was you Karl. Yo... (Below threshold)
sentinel:

I knew it was you Karl. You broke my heart, you BROKE my heart!.

Kerry rehearses for his Ele... (Below threshold)

Kerry rehearses for his Election Night concession speech.

"Pass this big hug along to... (Below threshold)
Chris W.:

"Pass this big hug along to your AFL-CIO brothers who ransacked Bush-Cheney HQ in Orlando the other day. I owe them one."


http://www.local6.com/politics/3785861/detail.html

I LOVE ya man. ... (Below threshold)
Bunkwunk:

I LOVE ya man.

"We girlie-men gotta stick ... (Below threshold)
Jim:

"We girlie-men gotta stick together."

"A little lower ... lower .... (Below threshold)

"A little lower ... lower ... oh yeah, right there ..."

Someone had to do it:... (Below threshold)

Someone had to do it:

T-Shirt: $30. $15 if your dues are paid.

Donations to the DNC: In the millions.

Getting man-hugged without his lizard tounge sticking out: Priceless.

1)Kerry: "I wonder if anyon... (Below threshold)

1)Kerry: "I wonder if anyone would notice if my hand slid down just a bit..."

2)Other Guy: "C'mon Kerry, it's been like two hours already..."

Unidentified technician sea... (Below threshold)
JPM:

Unidentified technician searches for the battery compartment on world's most prominent UN robot.

Wait. You're not James McGr... (Below threshold)
Mays:

Wait. You're not James McGreevey!

Kerry demonstrates how real... (Below threshold)

Kerry demonstrates how real Democrats do breast cancer lump exams.

You had me at AFLCIO...... (Below threshold)
Brandt:

You had me at AFLCIO...

Mamma know, Child. Momma k... (Below threshold)

Mamma know, Child. Momma know.

I have always felt the AFL-... (Below threshold)

I have always felt the AFL-CIO was a civil union.

Thank you for stealing the ... (Below threshold)

Thank you for stealing the election for me.

Sweet, he didn't notice the... (Below threshold)

Sweet, he didn't notice the "Kick me!" sign I palmed

Hey, man, good work busting... (Below threshold)
D Carter:

Hey, man, good work busting up the Bush/Cheney headquarters in Orlando.

Oooh God... He smells just ... (Below threshold)
Lemon Funk:

Oooh God... He smells just like John Edwards!

There, there, Johnny E.... ... (Below threshold)
OneDrummer:

There, there, Johnny E.... don't you worry none bout that bad, bad Dick Cheney. Remember, sticks and stones....

oO(why do those Republicans... (Below threshold)
OneDrummer:

oO(why do those Republicans call these guys brown shirts anyways? They're all wearing white....)

“I’d do everything possible... (Below threshold)
OneDrummer:

“I’d do everything possible,” John Kerry said in a taped interview broadcast Thursday night - “Our moral leadership is not what it ought to be.”


After a long pre-debate pre... (Below threshold)
jmaster:

After a long pre-debate preparation “session” with fellow Massachusetts Senator Ted Kennedy, a stage hand struggles to place Democratic candidate John Kerry into position in front of his lectern.

There there, champ. Daddy ... (Below threshold)
Lemon Funk:

There there, champ. Daddy will get you new hamster.

All together now:L... (Below threshold)
Chrees:

All together now:

Look for the union label
When you are buying that pol, that Senator, or Prez.
Remember somewhere our union's hugging,
Our dues go for bribes, and booze, and sex!

Maybe I am gay, not that th... (Below threshold)
DaveS:

Maybe I am gay, not that there is anything wrong with that.

After an AFL-CIO member des... (Below threshold)

After an AFL-CIO member describe his loss of his hamster, Senator John Kerry reminds him that loss isn't just reserved to union workers as Kerry cannot find his baby boy John Edwards on the stump.

Ooooh, Manuel, you're such ... (Below threshold)
Andre3000:

Ooooh, Manuel, you're such a little monkey woman...

The Presidential candidate ... (Below threshold)
Andre3000:

The Presidential candidate inside me says, "Stop with the hug," but my little seaman says, "Here's my room key!"

Hugging you reminds me of a... (Below threshold)
Andre3000:

Hugging you reminds me of a time I was hugging an NVA representative in Paris...

It's been such a long time ... (Below threshold)
Andre3000:

It's been such a long time since I've felt your oily black hair on my cheek...

"Oh, if only he had money"<... (Below threshold)
mijammie:

"Oh, if only he had money"

Its so much better doing th... (Below threshold)
OneDrummer:

Its so much better doing this in jammies, but this will have to do.....

"I love you, Union Guy, but... (Below threshold)
Tony:

"I love you, Union Guy, but I could also snap your neck with this grip, like the way I killed Commies in Vietnam, er, Cambodia, er Vietnam. By the way, did you know I served in Vietnam?"

or

"Thank you following the union's command to vote for me, even though I disagree with just about everything you believe in."

It's true! Made in America ... (Below threshold)
OneDrummer:

It's true! Made in America is better than that stuff made in France or China.....

Two thought bubbles appear:... (Below threshold)
Andre3000:

Two thought bubbles appear:

JK - "Words to describe myself: Urbane. Esteemed. Good hair. Athletic. Multi-lateral. Nuanced. Tall."

Huggable Union Guy - "This guy smells like 'High Karate'."

Homina homina homina homina... (Below threshold)
Andre3000:

Homina homina homina homina.

Well, it's a wonderful nigh... (Below threshold)
OneDrummer:

Well, it's a wonderful night for a moondance....

Another thought bubble appe... (Below threshold)
Andre3000:

Another thought bubble appears overhead:

JK: "One-one thousand, two-one thousand, three-one thousand, four-one thousand... and release."

Jimmy, do you like gladiato... (Below threshold)
Andre3000:

Jimmy, do you like gladiator movies?

John F Kennedy - true war h... (Below threshold)
OneDrummer:

John F Kennedy - true war hero, married to Jackie O, hugs Marilyn Monroe

John F Kerry - self-inflicted rice shrapnel, married to Tuh-Ray-Za, hugs queer eye for the union guy....

I'm being followed by a moo... (Below threshold)
OneDrummer:

I'm being followed by a moonbat-o.....

Judas kisses the Union Memb... (Below threshold)
Jim Hines:

Judas kisses the Union Member.

Now, Senator, when you said... (Below threshold)
Sean:

Now, Senator, when you said you could "come from behind,"...

"AFL-CIO? Oh, I thought you... (Below threshold)
Rodney Dill:

"AFL-CIO? Oh, I thought you said something about A Fellatio."

How much are you worth?... (Below threshold)
toddzilla:

How much are you worth?

So that's what they mean by... (Below threshold)
Layman:

So that's what they mean by special interest groupie.

Kerry: "I was for gay marri... (Below threshold)

Kerry: "I was for gay marriage before I was against it."

Kerry thought he was asking... (Below threshold)
Aural_B:

Kerry thought he was asking Jesus for the presidency, until somebody told him that it was pronounced "hay-soos"

Senator Kerry reminisces ab... (Below threshold)
OneDrummer:

Senator Kerry reminisces about his days growing up as an altar boy in the Boston Archdiocese....

Kerry supporters line up at... (Below threshold)

Kerry supporters line up at Disney's new hug the candidates mannequin ride unveiled yesterday at euro-disney...

only union members are allo... (Below threshold)

only union members are allowed to operate the Kerry robot.

Kerry thinking to himself..... (Below threshold)
martinphilbrook:

Kerry thinking to himself....

I hope nobody notices my rise in my levi's

I think it moved....... (Below threshold)
OneDrummer:

I think it moved....

I love the smell of atrocit... (Below threshold)
Jim Hines:

I love the smell of atrocity in the morning......

"Uhhhhhh...I love the way y... (Below threshold)

"Uhhhhhh...I love the way you sqeeze my buns!"

Wanna see my purple head, e... (Below threshold)
Midaz:

Wanna see my purple head, errrr, heart?

Can you FEEL the smoothy go... (Below threshold)
Patrick:

Can you FEEL the smoothy goodness of my freshly wrinkle-free skin?

When democrats drink.... (Below threshold)
Jim Hines:

When democrats drink.
or...
Welcome to my sensitive war.
or...
"Bilateral negotiations...that's what I'm talkin about."

Right man, right place, rig... (Below threshold)
Jim Hines:

Right man, right place, right time. OoooooLaLa!

In my best Homer Simpson vo... (Below threshold)
Mark:

In my best Homer Simpson voice:

"Hmmm... Uuuunion!"

Hey, man. Nice shooting.... (Below threshold)
Grant Miller:

Hey, man. Nice shooting... No really, thanks for the support. Uh.. too bad you didn't hit anybody in the back.

So Timmy, have you ever bee... (Below threshold)
Headzero:

So Timmy, have you ever been in a Turkish bathhouse?

"I know, I know... I can't ... (Below threshold)

"I know, I know... I can't believe the Boobie-thon is over either. But we'll survive -- somehow..."

Thanks for beating up those... (Below threshold)
Fred:

Thanks for beating up those Bush/Cheney volunteers.

- There there son...I know... (Below threshold)
Hunter:

- There there son...I know we lost...but its not the end of the world....I've got some "Hillery is on the way" bumper stickers in the SUV if it will make you feel better....

The men embrace in dance --... (Below threshold)
elvis-is-in-the-house:

The men embrace in dance ----

Love me tender, love me sweet, Never let me go. Your vote will make my life complete, And I love you so.

Love me tender, love me true, All my dreams fulfill. For, my darling, I love you, And for your vote I will.

Love me tender, love me long, Vote me in your heart. For it's there that I belong, And we need not ever part.

Love me tender, love me dear, Tell me your vote is mine. I'll be yours through all the year, Till my point in time.

And when at last my dreams come true, Darling this I know, I'll tax what's yours and give to mine, Everywhere you go

Love me tender, vote for me and you'll see the light. Al Quida will win this war we're'in, As I'll give-up the fight.

Bill had his intern... now ... (Below threshold)
OneDrummer:

Bill had his intern... now I have mine!

I wasn't hugging you before... (Below threshold)

I wasn't hugging you before I was hugging you.

"Thank you for the thousan... (Below threshold)
Rocketman:

"Thank you for the thousands of new voters registered in Ohio, but next time use dead people like the good old days!"

God damn, that's one ugl... (Below threshold)

God damn, that's one ugly baby.

" So sorry! I'll have to st... (Below threshold)
wolf terner:

" So sorry! I'll have to stick with Teresa. She's got more money."

No, I really love the new c... (Below threshold)
J.R.:

No, I really love the new cologne. Wait a minute, maybe I don't like it as much as I thought. Well, yes, I really do love the new cologne. I really do and that's my decision. But then again it reminds me of Vietnam... Well, yes I do love the new cologne... But then again no, I have to think about this again... But damn you smell good... But wait, no you don't... I mean...

" So sorry! I'll have to st... (Below threshold)
wolf terner:

" So sorry! I'll have to stick with Teresa. She's got more money."

I promise to give you lovin... (Below threshold)

I promise to give you lovin' in the manner of Ghengis Khan.

If I where president, no on... (Below threshold)

If I where president, no one in your union would have to work to be employed, only hug.

ah the sweet abandon of an ... (Below threshold)
caltechgirl:

ah the sweet abandon of an illicit love.... at least until John finds out I'm cheating on him.......

It was good for me. Was it ... (Below threshold)
Remy Logan:

It was good for me. Was it good for you? Don't worry, you'll be walking normal again in just a day or two.

The difference between the ... (Below threshold)
OneDrummer:

The difference between the President and myself is, I have a plan. And here it is....

First Rodney,allow ... (Below threshold)
MahaRichie:


First Rodney,allow me to thank you for taking those God auful panties off your head.Yes I know MahaRichie has been a thorn in your side.However, that does not excuse your very forward probe of MY hip area.

Need some wood, Mr. Kerry?<... (Below threshold)
OneDrummer:

Need some wood, Mr. Kerry?

Why, thanks, Maha. Right about now, I could use some.....

There, there. Buck up, lit... (Below threshold)
Russ:

There, there. Buck up, little camper. I'm sure you'll hit something the next time you shoot at a GOP office.

Another five minutes I'll b... (Below threshold)
Jeff:

Another five minutes I'll be in bed with this union.

I want to thank you and the... (Below threshold)
Paul M:

I want to thank you and the rest of your union brothers and sisters for attacking those Bush/Chaney Re-elections Headquarters across the country. Keep up the great work!

Hmmmmm, oh you feel sooooo ... (Below threshold)
firstbrokenangel:

Hmmmmm, oh you feel sooooo good; smell sooooo nice. Ahhhhhh just let me hold you a few seconds more...... and so young and virile, too. Oh, man, this is so sweet, sure better than the 3 bagger I have to sleep with every night. Ahhhhh hmmmm heaven.

hehehe
~C

Yes Onedummer I know... (Below threshold)
MahaRichie:


Yes Onedummer I know you have a plan,and I support you.However,this Campaign is a much more serious situation then you may believe.
While I support your right to wear ladies (crotchless)panties on your head,I John Kerry say:Hey where can a pair of those that will fit Tereza ?

Now this is the type<... (Below threshold)
OneDrummer:

Now this is the type of allies I'm talking about. And W wonders why I keep insisting on having them.....

I feel your pain. I once s... (Below threshold)
Pat Adkins:

I feel your pain. I once stood in a picket line like this...right after I got back from Cambodia, and Kyoto, and shooting that 8-point buck, etc., etc., etc.

Listen son,there is... (Below threshold)
MahaRichie:


Listen son,there is more to life then sitting around with a bunch of girlie men,in your underwear,drinking beer,and congratulating each other for their "ingenious" caption entries.
Oh,by the way when is your next get together?

I love you you little union... (Below threshold)
Jeff:

I love you you little union bitch.

Presidential candidate John... (Below threshold)
McCain:

Presidential candidate John Kerry announces that he is a compassionate conservative.

Damning new photo captures ... (Below threshold)
McCain:

Damning new photo captures John Kerry meeting with Koo Foo Woo at the Paris Peace Talks.

MASSACHEUSSETTS SHOCKER !!!... (Below threshold)
McCain:

MASSACHEUSSETTS SHOCKER !!!
John Kerry weds in one billionth gay wedding.

Senator Kerry demonstrates ... (Below threshold)
McCain:

Senator Kerry demonstrates that he is not your ordinary tree hugging liberal.

"If you flip it, it won't f... (Below threshold)
Tripped:

"If you flip it, it won't flop I promise.

Ahh, that's it, Joey.... th... (Below threshold)
OneDrummer:

Ahh, that's it, Joey.... that's the scar where the rice impaled my buttocks..... think you can do the same?

Why didn't I listen to Sull... (Below threshold)
OneDrummer:

Why didn't I listen to Sullivan sooner? Need to make up for lost time!!

Their roiling passions tang... (Below threshold)

Their roiling passions tangled together into an intense embrace, such were the primal desires that surged between two men who didn't like bush.

You had me at "I'll vote". ... (Below threshold)
pvaughan:

You had me at "I'll vote". You had me at "I'll vote".

The President and I have ex... (Below threshold)

The President and I have exactly the same position on gay marriage. Exactly.

local union worker decides ... (Below threshold)

local union worker decides to take his middle class tax cut up front by lifting Kerry's wallet

When trees hug back...... (Below threshold)
andre3000:

When trees hug back...

A little lower... lower... ... (Below threshold)
andre3000:

A little lower... lower... lower... LOOOOOWERRRRR...

Now let me see....The yello... (Below threshold)
Doug Book:

Now let me see....The yellow wristband goes on the right hand if your straight, doesn't it?

Think about baseball. Think... (Below threshold)

Think about baseball. Think about baseball. Touchdownss, tight buns. ooh, not working.

This yellow band gives me a free ride. Come here.

Work that steel, just......... (Below threshold)

Work that steel, just......work......it. Nnnnng steeeeeeel.

Kerry rehearses a "spontane... (Below threshold)

Kerry rehearses a "spontaneous" show of affection planned for next week's debate. Reacting to polls showing the Senator to be "stoic" and "cold", Kerry has chosen to copy Gore's strategy for overcoming similar perceptions four years ago. A campaign staffer is shown filling in for Theresa who refused to practice, saying "I already know how to hug. What do you think, I'm a dumb-ass idiot Republican or something?"

Yeah, I'm sorry that I lost... (Below threshold)

Yeah, I'm sorry that I lost too.

revised: If you flip it, I ... (Below threshold)
Tripped:

revised: If you flip it, I won't flop this time.

This dry humping is SEARED ... (Below threshold)

This dry humping is SEARED in my memory.

Mmmmmmmmmmmm.... Bush wood.... (Below threshold)

Mmmmmmmmmmmm.... Bush wood.

"I know it was you, Fredo. ... (Below threshold)

"I know it was you, Fredo. You broke my heart. You broke my heart."

Kerry whispers in his ear:<... (Below threshold)
-S-:

Kerry whispers in his ear:

"Do YOU have wood?"


--------------------------------

So, O.K., that was terrible.

I never win, I'm giving up on the Caption Contests, although they sure are entertaining!

Kerry:"I grab your... (Below threshold)
-S-:

Kerry:

"I grab your throat, I pat your back, I grab your throat, I pat your back, I grab your throat, I pat your....oops, I grabbed a bit too sternly with a bit too much force and command of the neck area..."

Labor Pains... (Below threshold)
Dean Satterlee:

Labor Pains

A bunch of junior high leve... (Below threshold)
Chuck Werden:

A bunch of junior high level gay jokes. Very nice guys.

Its a shame you have to stoop to this kind of thing to cover up the (extremely well documented) lies of your candidate.

The largest abuse of the intelligence services in the history of the US.

The most negative presidential campaign in history.

You have truly embarrassed this once great nation.

Just what are you implying,... (Below threshold)
Sean:

Just what are you implying, Chuck?

Senator,is that a bottle o... (Below threshold)
MahaRichie:

Senator,is that a bottle of ketchup or are you just glad I'm going to vote for you?

JK thought bubble: "One-Mas... (Below threshold)
andre3000:

JK thought bubble: "One-Massachusetts, two-Massachusetts, three-Massachusetts, four-Massachusetts...aaaand release."

Chuck, is that just one more Jr. High level gay joke?

BTW, Chuck, what IS Kerry's plan for Iran if they go nuclear again? Oh, yeah. He's going to follow the French. Brilliant!

So, Chuck Warden, what YOU ... (Below threshold)
-S-:

So, Chuck Warden, what YOU are writing is that "Bush lied," and "Bush is Hitler" and, oh, yeah, "down with Halliburton"?

I guess I ~can~ see/hear Kerry saying that to the union labelled guy in his arms.

It's a caption contest, it's meant to be silly. We need silly every now and then. Democrats could use more silly that DOES NOT involve naked hippies on parade in Berkeley (for starters).

Which now gives me another ... (Below threshold)
-S-:

Which now gives me another idea for another caption for the photo, as follows:


Kerry whispers in the guy's ear:

"Come to me, UnionGuy, come with me to Massachusetts, where we can windsurf together on union made boards, with union made sheets blowing in the wind, come with me, UnionGuy, to the Workers' Paradise that is my farm in Pennsylvania, come with me, UnionGuy, to barnstorm in Minnesota and Florida, come with me, UnionGuy..."

Senator Kerry gent... (Below threshold)
MahaRichie:


Senator Kerry gently"burps" a gay union worker named Chuck, who in his "girlieman like" exuberance ingested the the Democratic cool-aid too quickly.

Update: <a href="ht... (Below threshold)

Update: Winners announced. Comments are now closed.




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