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"Anything for a good line..."

A while ago, I dated a woman that I fell hard for. One of the things we had in common (and one of the things I loved most about her) was we both would engineer circumstances and fudge events "just for the sake of a good line." We'd never out-and-out lie, but misleading comments and playing on perceptions of others was all too fair.

I think the best example of that was during one of our first dates. During the course of the evening, I suddenly realized I was short on certain medical supplies (I am an insulin-dependent diabetic) and asked if she minded if we stopped at a drug store. While there, I noticed that soda was on sale, and stocked up on that. On completing my purchases, we resumed the date (I think it was dinner and a movie, with the stop just before dinner).

I don't recall the particulars of the date, other than it went well (we were together, off and on, for some time after), but I do recall one detail from that night. Apparently she told several friends that the highlight of the evening was when I "took her along while I bought some hypodermic needles and Coke."

I couldn't really argue with the literal truth of it, but I still wish she'd found a more complimentary way to describe the evening...

J.


Comments (15)

Beware but that this one hi... (Below threshold)
Tig:

Beware but that this one hits the email forward circuit and goes around AOL for the next decade ... without any attribution.

Good thing you didn't stop ... (Below threshold)
IR:

Good thing you didn't stop for a pair of goulashes and to get your saxaphone tuned up...

(it will come to you)
Cheers...
IR

Truth is "perception" and s... (Below threshold)
Pat Adkins:

Truth is "perception" and subject to the "eye of the beholder." Hope you got laid.

That is freakin hilarious..... (Below threshold)
Henry:

That is freakin hilarious...that also gets sent on a huge forward around.

Guffaw!! :-)... (Below threshold)
Omni:

Guffaw!! :-)

OK, IR, I got the "Galoshes... (Below threshold)
Jay Tea:

OK, IR, I got the "Galoshes" one (presuming you were talking about rubber overshoes and not pasta dishes), but I'm stumped on the saxophone.

Fess up, or I'll actually explain what "visiting the ferrets" was a euphemism for, and how the term evolved...

J.

I guess it depends what the... (Below threshold)
Les Nessman:

I guess it depends what the meaning of 'is' is.
Her last name wasn't Clinton, was it?

Hey Jay Tea, the problem ki... (Below threshold)
IR:

Hey Jay Tea, the problem kids these days is that there is too much sax and violins....*har*

I share your sickness for a... (Below threshold)
Dacotti:

I share your sickness for a good line. My wife and I were once trying to set up a woman at her office with a playboy friend of mine who had a thing for, umm, larger women. The previous weekend he had been drinking pretty hard and was shot down by a very attractive lady he was trying to get out on the dance floor. He came back to the table and plopped down with feigned dejection. Someone said, "I suppose a blow job is out of the question." and he said "I don't know, I didn't ask." At which point he got up and went back to talk to her for another shoot-down.

So the next weekend, we had our friend send a drink over to him and he politely came over and asked her if she would like to dance, at which point she replied, "I don't care to dance thank you, but I'd be happy to give you a blow-job."

The whole bar was anticipating the line and it was like an EF Hutton comercial when she dropped the line on him. Absolutely priceless. The guy just froze there with a shocked smile on his face while the whole bar erupted into laughter.

J - you just need to find a... (Below threshold)
firstbrokenangel:

J - you just need to find a better class of women to date. I know it's not easy at our age, but they are out there. Attraction is over-rated; you need someone with a sick mind like yours.

Cindy

Lovely.I do some b... (Below threshold)
Mark:

Lovely.

I do some blacksmithing in my sparetime, and my ex-wife used to delight in introducing me as 'her husband the forger'.

You probably already know t... (Below threshold)

You probably already know this, but if you don't, google "cinnamon diabetes." Also, I'm assuming yours is Type II (adult onset); I don't this is as relevant for Type I.

My favorite line when I'm a... (Below threshold)
Boyd:

My favorite line when I'm about to step out for a smoke is, "I'm gonna go suck a fag."

Those unfamiliar with British slang tend to get uncomfortable at that point.

I would do that. As my mom ... (Below threshold)
GB:

I would do that. As my mom would say; I never lied but I never told the truth.

My husband and I are really... (Below threshold)

My husband and I are really good embellishers when we work together too. It's not really "lying" but just making a good story "better".




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