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Where oh where is Little Pet Troll?

As many of you know, we have our own pet troll here at Wizbang! Well, OK we have several but I'm only talking about one specific pet troll today. I'll call him Little Pet Troll. Little Pet Troll loves to search this site for anything to be offended by. Then when he thinks he finds it, he runs back to his blog and posts a breathless post about how the world is coming to an end because of something someone wrote on Wizbang!

Then when someone, usually Kevin, explains to Little Pet Troll what was really said (something Little Pet Troll could have determined by actually reading) Little Pet Troll makes a comment like "Whew, thanks Kevin, I was worried for a minute there." As if humanity itself had been saved by a few words from Mr. Aylward.

In reality, Little Pet Troll got the attention he so desperately craves and he is now satisfied... Until a few days later when the whole cycle including the "Whew, thanks Kevin, I was worried for a minute there" line will be repeated. It is a vicious recurring cycle.

Another thing you should know about Little Pet Troll is that he LOVES to link what he has been reading. By golly, he does it morning, noon and night.

Considering his self professed high moral standards, I was surprised Little Pet Troll did not link to the post below about the Kosmonuts cheating in the Weblog Awards and give them a strong rebuke. I mean-- he could never be feigning outrage at a right-wing blog but giving lefties a pass when they commit vote fraud could he? No, not my Little Pet Troll, I'd never believe such a thing.

I hope he's not sick or anything... I mean, I KNOW he would trash the Kosmonuts if he saw this.

I guess I'll just have to wonder where Little Pet Troll is.

P.S. We just got future posting at Wizbang so I will set this to be fired in about 3 hours. I don't want to be a jerk and accuse Little Pet Troll of being an attention starved hopeless partisan hack without giving Little Pet Troll time to get going in the morning. He may surprise me and get real morals... though I expect the silence to be deafening. But we shall see...

If he does surprise me and this gets posted AFTER he links the post, that's still OK.

He can't complain about his post because I'll say in advance. "Whew, thanks Little Pet Troll, for a minute there I was worried."

That line has been known to handle everything.


Comments (6)

Paul, how have I missed thi... (Below threshold)
Jay Tea:

Paul, how have I missed this goober? More importantly, how could you have not shared him with me?

Now I gotta go back through my postings and see if I can ID the little twerp...

But I guess it's only fair. I didn't share the Resolutely Clueless Moron or James The Aussie Antisemitic Arsehole, so you can keep Little Pet Troll.

J.

Well, as a ruthlessly puris... (Below threshold)
Bloghorn Bleghorn:

Well, as a ruthlessly purist libertarian, I give lefties fart-hailure on a regular basis. Let me see if I can flush this quail. ;^)

1] Income should never be taxed, only consumption.

2] Voting should not be an automatic right upon reaching the age of inclusion. Home ownership and a high school diploma seem like a reasonable minimum requirement for voter enfranchisement.

3] All forms of "welfare", including WIC and "dissability" (If you have to tell somebody you're disabled for them to notice, get a job!), are government subsidized breeding programs for poor unmotivated inner-city blacks, rurtal whites, migrant hispanics, and residents of indian reservations and should be ended. They also create a dole-enslaved voting bloc for the Democrat party.

4] Social Security and Medicare/Medicaid are only one small degree removed frome welfare, and should be ended as well.

5] Public moneys should not fund NPR, Public TV, or any arts (I'm a composer, and I make my own living. Every artist should have to be an independent contractor like I am).

Um... That's enough. That ought to do it.

If a troll is forced to be ... (Below threshold)
Omni:

If a troll is forced to be consistent, doesn't his head explode, lol?

Bloghorn, I'll do you one b... (Below threshold)

Bloghorn, I'll do you one better on your #2: The driving age should be raised to 21, the drinking age to 25, and the voting age to 30. As for going to war, draft 'em as soona s they learn to cuss.

In some communities there'd be a lot of nine-year-olds being shipped off to boot camp...

"If a troll is forced to be... (Below threshold)
Paul:

"If a troll is forced to be consistent, doesn't his head explode, lol?"

roflmao

Okay, Paul, you got our cur... (Below threshold)
Lee Shore:

Okay, Paul, you got our curiosity up. Just who is LPT and what's the URL of his blog?

Name names. Maybe I'm not the only one who doesn't know the outer, leftmost purlieus of the blogosphere.

~LS




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