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Weekend Caption Contest™

It's Friday, which means it's time for the Wizbang Weekend Caption Contest™. Enter your best caption for this picture.

Bill Gates , chairman and chief software architect of Microsoft Corp., laughs as he plays an Xbox car racing game against talk show host Conan O'Brian at the 2005 International Consumer Electronics Show in Las Vegas January 5, 2005. Underscoring the importance of choice and flexibility in bringing the digital lifestyle into the mainstream, Gates showcased innovations in digital music, photos, television and movies, gaming and communications. REUTERS/Jeff Christensen


Update: Winners finally announced. Comments are now closed.


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Comments (102)

Bill: "Ha, he'll never have... (Below threshold)
Rodney Dill:

Bill: "Ha, he'll never have this sucker judged by Sunday."

Heehee, no it wasn't me tha... (Below threshold)
Dougrc:

Heehee, no it wasn't me that farted! The smellers the feller!

This Sega Genesis Rocks!!! ... (Below threshold)
Matt:

This Sega Genesis Rocks!!! It really is the digital age!

Man, the lab guys said cont... (Below threshold)
M. Murcek:

Man, the lab guys said controlling a brain implant is lots of fun, but this is just way too good!

Boy, this new sub $500 MAC ... (Below threshold)
RodgerH:

Boy, this new sub $500 MAC is great!

Haircut at Fantastic Sams -... (Below threshold)

Haircut at Fantastic Sams - $8
Spiderman II Game - The Quest For Kirsten's Nipples - $46
X-Box Console - $110 on eBay
The ability to bang even the hottest of supermodels by simply waving a blank check even though you are a complete dork - Priceless

Bill: "Bwah hah hah! My com... (Below threshold)
OneDrummer:

Bill: "Bwah hah hah! My complete domination of the world is almost complete! Mommy, is it time for lunch?"

He he he... The wiggles mak... (Below threshold)
Schwerv:

He he he... The wiggles make me laugh.

Ain't no way Stephen Hawkin... (Below threshold)
FormerHostage:

Ain't no way Stephen Hawking's gonna figure out I hacked his wheelchair!

"The new MS Washingtonie... (Below threshold)
Rodney Dill:

"The new MS Washingtonienne Interactive Game sure beats just watching Paris Hilton videos."

Crab, GIVE me the re... (Below threshold)
OneDrummer:

Crab, GIVE me the receipe to the Krabby Patty, or I will destroy you....

Halo III - Fight the Alien ... (Below threshold)
Justin B:

Halo III - Fight the Alien Master Race that enslaves world population through high priced software before their evil leader spreads his genes to silicon injected supermodels.

Dr. Strangelove meets Dr. N... (Below threshold)
anastasia:

Dr. Strangelove meets Dr. No.

"And now I'll make Kerry fl... (Below threshold)
Teflon93:

"And now I'll make Kerry flop back to his original position...."

Oh Master Chief, you comple... (Below threshold)
S.K.:

Oh Master Chief, you complete me.

Bill Gates plays the latest... (Below threshold)
Teflon93:

Bill Gates plays the latest XBox game---"Monopoly."

"Ok--left, left, up, right,... (Below threshold)
Teflon93:

"Ok--left, left, up, right, right, fire---and Tara Reid's dress drops on cue."

"Man, Linux is FUN!!!"... (Below threshold)
Teflon93:

"Man, Linux is FUN!!!"

Bill thinks to himself: "I... (Below threshold)

Bill thinks to himself: "I have no clue what I'm doing right now. I just bought a few companies out so my grand kids could have cool toys."

"I love it when I get to th... (Below threshold)

"I love it when I get to the level where I can make David Boies fall into the pit full of pungee sticks!"

A screencap from "Leisure S... (Below threshold)
Teflon93:

A screencap from "Leisure Suit Larry: Mogul Madness."

"C'mon, dance, Greenspan---... (Below threshold)
Teflon93:

"C'mon, dance, Greenspan---DANCE!"

I sure am glad I grabbed th... (Below threshold)
Rick13:

I sure am glad I grabbed the "Tsunami" power block on level 13!

I'm saddened. I caught ont... (Below threshold)
Exile:

I'm saddened. I caught onto Wizbang several months back and have been visiting daily.

However, it saddens me to see how this once great site is slipping into the Mac vs Windows cesspool. The usual Mac Zealots vs Windows Groupies vs Penguin Pushers idiocy seems to have risen front and center here.

A real crying shame. Nice knowing you.

During a demontration of th... (Below threshold)

During a demontration of the latest in the GeekWare line of MS products, Gates is seen "accidentally" setting the VirtualDate to the 'homerun' setting.

Man, I need to get me one o... (Below threshold)
Brian:

Man, I need to get me one of these!

Say, this PS2 stuff is good... (Below threshold)
Dad:

Say, this PS2 stuff is good! I Wonder what Sony stock is going for?

Bill reviews the new shrink... (Below threshold)
leelu:

Bill reviews the new shrinkwrap license for all MS products:

"... a nickel a breath from every user!"

BWAHAHAHAAAAAAAA!

Bill Gates, pictured here p... (Below threshold)

Bill Gates, pictured here playing Dead or Alive Xtreme Beach Volleyball, moments after he pushes his glasses up, snorts, and says, "I like girls."

"Now Herr Torvalds, ve haf ... (Below threshold)
Spektr:

"Now Herr Torvalds, ve haf vays auf makeeng you talk..."

"I know this thing will wor... (Below threshold)
trappedinmn:

"I know this thing will work just as soon as the tubes warm up in the television...."

Dan Rather is easy to steer... (Below threshold)
keith:

Dan Rather is easy to steer but the Michael Moore fart button is more fun...

"Ok, now watch this---I'll ... (Below threshold)
Teflon93:

"Ok, now watch this---I'll make Barbara Boxer cry..."

"Let's see, all I need is t... (Below threshold)
JAT:

"Let's see, all I need is to manufacture a few more votes in Washington - then my new voting PDA will be ready for the DNC!"

"Man, Ballmer's wishing he ... (Below threshold)
Teflon93:

"Man, Ballmer's wishing he didn't have my gig now, isn't he?"

"Christine? How many more ... (Below threshold)
Teflon93:

"Christine? How many more votes did you say you needed?"

The Bill Gates action figur... (Below threshold)
Teflon93:

The Bill Gates action figure. Push the botton and nothing happens.

And Mr. Pacman goobles up a... (Below threshold)
Allium:

And Mr. Pacman goobles up all the nasty ghosts.

Microsoft founder Bill Gate... (Below threshold)
stoj:

Microsoft founder Bill Gates demos the latest Xbox game, which allows you to try on different hairstyles.

Bill Gates has an intimate ... (Below threshold)
Golfer:

Bill Gates has an intimate moment with his wife.

"Blue screen of what now? ... (Below threshold)
JimK:

"Blue screen of what now? Oh, that's not a bug, that's a feature."

"Heeee .....hacking into my... (Below threshold)
sondrad:

"Heeee .....hacking into my bank account... what a cool move.... how many zeros make a gazillion?....tee hee...."

Excerpted from the Ratherga... (Below threshold)
Teflon93:

Excerpted from the Rathergate Report: an actual photo of the documents being forged.

No, Mr. Jobs... I expect yo... (Below threshold)

No, Mr. Jobs... I expect you to DIE!

"From my heart and from my ... (Below threshold)

"From my heart and from my hands/why don't people understand/my intentions?"

It's alive! ALI... oh, bugg... (Below threshold)

It's alive! ALI... oh, bugger. The monster's blue-screened again. Igor! Get the ****ing jumper-cables!

Now what do I do? I can't ... (Below threshold)
Allium:

Now what do I do? I can't find the "any" key.

Don't we have any other goo... (Below threshold)

Don't we have any other good games besides Halo?

Life is good - thanks to Vi... (Below threshold)
Norm:

Life is good - thanks to Viagra I am smiling again, playing neat video games and will now rename my company "Microhard"

"Best feature? Well, what ... (Below threshold)
Jim W:

"Best feature? Well, what you can't see on the screen... is how I've connected this joystick to MY joystick!"

The audience thought money ... (Below threshold)

The audience thought money was the explanation for his popularity until they realized that that's not his knee.

Wow, this PlayStation is co... (Below threshold)

Wow, this PlayStation is cool. Hey guys, take the innards and package it as a Microsoft product.

"This is Bill. Bill is doin... (Below threshold)

"This is Bill. Bill is doing well. Very well indeed. That's because, not long ago, with just a quick phone call and a free brochure, Bill realized he could have something better in his life. And what did he get? Why, not only a boost of confidence, a little more self esteem and a very big promotion; he got the very thing that makes a man really successful: a very happy Mrs. at home."

Microsoft guru Bill Gates d... (Below threshold)
Jhn1:

Microsoft guru Bill Gates demonstrates the new official "unofficial" patch for Halo 2. New missions include destruction of Fortresses Linux and Mozilla and "take-downs" of certain Federal judges, federal Procecutors, and the Mass. Attornet General as well as a host of various federal, state, and private attorneys.

Bill Gates demonstrates the... (Below threshold)
scottb:

Bill Gates demonstrates the new MS OnTheSpot system, allowing couples to pleasure each other remotely. "I'm pretty sure I'm connected up with my wife!" He chortled...

Spongebill Dorkpants?... (Below threshold)

Spongebill Dorkpants?
You're so dead, Ballmer.

Okay, I'm finished. A coupl... (Below threshold)
RR:

Okay, I'm finished. A couple clicks and we now have a dhimmocratic governor in Washington.

So Paul at Whizbang! is dis... (Below threshold)
jmaster:

So Paul at Whizbang! is dissing my stuff again.

I’ll show him....and this time I’ll post as Julie.

He he he. He’ll NEVER know its me!

Wait... this says that rule... (Below threshold)

Wait... this says that rule number one of Fight Club is the same as rule number two of Fight Club. Why was that not corrected in playtesting?

It only *looks* like I'm wr... (Below threshold)

It only *looks* like I'm writing a letter, you infernal paperclip. Feel the wrath of my magma guns!

Bill Gates tries his hand a... (Below threshold)
HRYK:

Bill Gates tries his hand at stand up comedy.

"My programs crash so much that even my clothes turned blue on me, but seriously folks..."

So *this* is what Pong look... (Below threshold)

So *this* is what Pong looks like! SEGA!!

Bill (Kent Dorfman): Oh, bo... (Below threshold)
OneDrummer:

Bill (Kent Dorfman): Oh, boy! This is gonna be sooooo great!

Bill Gates introduces Micro... (Below threshold)
jmaster:

Bill Gates introduces Microsoft’s answer to the IPOD.

“Its called a WINTARD, or a Windows Transistor AM Radio Device. It’s a great new technology. You'll no longer need to download songs from the web. The WINTARD receives them wirelessly! And instead of 99 cents, the songs are free! Before it gets out of beta, we think we can get it operating on batteries, so we can ditch this power cord. Listen: It’s the Beatles! These guys are going to be big!”

What? I've been playing th... (Below threshold)

What? I've been playing the microwave?

Tim McNabb
fivehundredwords.com

“Somebody tell me when... (Below threshold)

“Somebody tell me when the Blue Screen is gone so I'll know when to stop smiling.”

They don't call it Winbl... (Below threshold)
Rodney Dill:

They don't call it Winblows for nothing.

jmaster and cavemam are put... (Below threshold)
Rodney Dill:

jmaster and cavemam are putting up some pretty stiff competition.

Thanks Rodney!Plus... (Below threshold)
jmaster:

Thanks Rodney!

Plus you have aloowed me to become post number 69 (I hope!), a long time goal of mine.

Bill: You think beating me ... (Below threshold)
hwapper:

Bill: You think beating me at Madden is funny? Wait til I buy your company and have you laid off...

"Heh, I get paid to do this... (Below threshold)

"Heh, I get paid to do this."

Gates: Boy, these captions... (Below threshold)
jack rudd:

Gates: Boy, these captions on Wizbang are really funny!

Take that, Justice D... (Below threshold)
jack rudd:


Take that, Justice Department! All your lawyers are belong to us!

I can't believe the enginee... (Below threshold)

I can't believe the engineers actually got me a controller that will control the world.. ha ha take that Apple ..

Hair pie!... (Below threshold)
jmaster:

Hair pie!

In a quiet moment, Bill Gat... (Below threshold)
Robert:

In a quiet moment, Bill Gates checks his accounts with the latest online banking tool.

When that happens you just ... (Below threshold)
BoyNamedGoo:

When that happens you just hit CTRL-ALT-DEL and reboot the machine

A geek with more money than... (Below threshold)

A geek with more money than anyone else is still just a geek: The chair is more comfortable, the box is faster, the Mountain Dew is colder, but still spends all his free time playing video games.

Bill smiles proudly upon re... (Below threshold)
FreakyBoy:

Bill smiles proudly upon realizing the The MS-Chair V.2.2 had not crashed in over ten minutes.

Asians analyze video realiz... (Below threshold)
iggi marco:

Asians analyze video realizing Bill Gates was really chinese

Loving father, faithful hus... (Below threshold)

Loving father, faithful husband, most successfull businessman ever, and most philanthropic man in history shows that he really could care less what we think of him.

"'All your base are belong ... (Below threshold)

"'All your base are belong to us'? What the heck is that supposed to mean?"

"Uh-oh, Paul is close to tr... (Below threshold)

"Uh-oh, Paul is close to tracking me down as the source of all those 'Dave' comments in the Windows-vs.Mac thread. I'd better blue-screen his -- oh wait, he uses a Mac. Damn!"

"Watch me do my David Lette... (Below threshold)

"Watch me do my David Letterman grin!"

"Now, I can REALLY enjoy Le... (Below threshold)
bigmacwithanegg:

"Now, I can REALLY enjoy Leisure Suit Larry once these cameras leave"

Yesssss, feel the hate flow... (Below threshold)
OneDrummer:

Yesssss, feel the hate flow through you. Your training is complete, take your place by your master, young jedi.

That talking paperclip crac... (Below threshold)
jill girl:

That talking paperclip cracks me up every time!!!

Halo2 game for X-box: $50<b... (Below threshold)
redstatewannabe:

Halo2 game for X-box: $50
Force feedback controller: $80
Not having the darn machine crash every 5 minutes: priceless

Ha Ha Ha ! Remember 25 year... (Below threshold)
Doug:

Ha Ha Ha ! Remember 25 years ago when they all said computer technology would be ruled by the Japanese? Bite me.

Bill Gates thought balloon:... (Below threshold)
-S-:

Bill Gates thought balloon:

"Man oh MAN, am I LUCKY. Luck-eee."

Gates counting silently the... (Below threshold)
andre3000:

Gates counting silently the system crash-free seconds...

"Eighteen Mississippi, nineteen Mississippi..."

Jenna on Jenna - The.Best.G... (Below threshold)

Jenna on Jenna - The.Best.Game.Ever! Especially when you know all the hotkeys.

He he he he.. those pajama ... (Below threshold)
OneDrummer:

He he he he.. those pajama bloggers will be soooo pissed I launched those DDOS attacks on them!

hehhehhehheheh I am Cornhol... (Below threshold)

hehhehhehheheh I am Cornholio! hehehe I need t.p. for my bunghole! hehehehhe

I soooooo rule.... (Below threshold)

I soooooo rule.

I hate to say it, you're ri... (Below threshold)
OneDrummer:

I hate to say it, you're right. But Gates so doesn't inspire comedic genious.... I find myself wanting plain oatmeal and my brown dress socks with my highwater pants looking at him.

On a side note, at an official MS party/picnic, circa 1983 at Radar Lake, Gates shows up in a white t-shirt, tan gym shorts, brown socks and tennies. Glad to see he hasn't changed his geek factor any. His RX-7 didn't make him any cooler either, since it didn't even have a radio!

I wonder if it is too late ... (Below threshold)
BiggAndyy:

I wonder if it is too late to buy more stock in Trump's new Hair Care line? Let's log on and find out.

"I've even out sourced my h... (Below threshold)

"I've even out sourced my hair style to China!"
(note: that controler cable isn't running to an xbox, but his prostate and a car battery)

He who dies with the most t... (Below threshold)
Doug:

He who dies with the most toys -- WINS.

Lord Ballmer!(rasp... (Below threshold)

Lord Ballmer!

(raspy breathing) Yes, my master.

RISE!

HA HA HA ! I am able to man... (Below threshold)
Bill:

HA HA HA ! I am able to manipulate this contest and get caption in on Tuesday two days after Sunday cutoff.I havn't gotten this lucky since IBM foolishly gave me the software rights.

<a href="http://wizbangblog... (Below threshold)

Winners finally announced. Comments are now closed.




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