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Helping the New York Times fight terrorism

Yesterday, the New York Times published an editorial on subway safety. They reluctantly endorsed searches of passengers, but with a few caveats. The main one is that the police must, at all costs, make certain no single group is singled out for special attention. The selection process for searches must be perfectly random, such as every 5th or 12th person, carefully balanced to be applied evenly to all races and sexes.

That is a good theory, but it has a weakness: the terrorists have, so far, not been evenly distributed among the races and sexes. So far two have been men of Jamaican ancestry (Richard Reid, the would-be "shoe bomber" and one of the London bombers), one accused terrorist has been Hispanic (Jose Padilla), and nearly all the rest have been Arabic men. So a random search really won't work too well.

So, how do we resolve this problem? More importantly, how do we resolve it in a way that both improves public safety and will meet with the New York Times' approval?

It's simplicity itself. We need to sue the terrorists.

The United States has very stringent anti-discrimination laws, especially in the area of employment. Any group whose membership is that racially skewed is almost certainly practicing racial and sexual discrimination. We need to haul the terrorists into court and place them under a consent decree to increase their diversity and open themselves to all would-be terrorists, regardless of age, sex, race, creed, or color.

We are America, dammit! Our very strength draws from our diversity! We deserve to live in a society free of bias, where people from all walks of life are embraced and welcomed. All groups need to be free of bias and prejudice, and we as Americans deserve terrorists that, as Bill Clinton so eloquently put it, "looks like America."

Then, once we've forced the terrorists to open their ranks to diversity, the random searches that the New York Times endorsed will truly have a chance to succeed in keeping us all safe.


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Comments (17)

So, how do we resolve th... (Below threshold)
TheEnigma:

So, how do we resolve this problem? More importantly, how do we resolve it in a way that both improves public safety and will meet with the New York Times' approval?

It's simplicity itself. We need to sue the terrorists.

This would have worked perfectly with the recently arrested terrorist in The UK. He had been in England for approximately 12 yrs and spent his entire time"on the dole" and living in rent controlled subsidized housing. Any doubts that the laws would prevent a reduction in the "dole" he receives?

Affirmative action!... (Below threshold)
mesablue:

Affirmative action!

Liberal with no sense of hu... (Below threshold)
joe:

Liberal with no sense of humor commenting in 5....4....3....2....

Hmmmmmm...every 5th or 12th... (Below threshold)

Hmmmmmm...every 5th or 12th person is NOT random. It is what you would call a pattern. Shall we assume that terrorists can't count? How hard is it to figure out on "every 7th passenger day" that you are the next number 7 and stop to tie your shoe so you become the unsearched number 9?

Are you tired of your dead ... (Below threshold)
mantis:

Are you tired of your dead end job? Do you want to do something that makes a difference? Join the Islamic Jihad team and help bring the fight against the great Satan to your neighborhood. Benefits include rampant hedonism in the godless west as well as 40 virgins upon completion of a short probationary period. Training will be provided.

- Islamic Jihad is an Equal Opportunity Terrorist Organization. We do not discriminate based on race, creed, or sexual orientation.

mantis,Good one! ... (Below threshold)
joe:

mantis,

Good one! Forgot the dental plan, though.

All martyrs will have perfe... (Below threshold)
mantis:

All martyrs will have perfect teeth in paradise. And no co-pay.

As God wills it I shall cut... (Below threshold)
LOSER:

As God wills it I shall cut in line so that I will be the third and not the 5th person in line behind the last person searched.

What a LOSER idea.

I suppose the good news her... (Below threshold)
s9:

I suppose the good news here is that Jay Tea still can't quite bring himself to argue openly for mass internment— thanks be to Jayzus for small favors.

Lemme get this straight, s9... (Below threshold)
Jay Tea:

Lemme get this straight, s9: now you're criticizing me for things I didn't say, but you think I might? And you're doing this on a piece I classified "satire?"

Damn, boy, you get the GOOD drugs, don't you?

J.

Jay Tea writes: L... (Below threshold)
s9:

Jay Tea writes: Lemme get this straight, s9: now you're criticizing me for things I didn't say, but you think I might?

You don't accept praise very well, do you?

I wasn't criticizing you. I was praising you for continuing to resist the temptation to descend into openly calling for mass internment. I think it's a very good sign that you only have enough intestinal fortitude merely to crack jokes that imply you seriously perceive the need to conduct mass search and seizure. You don't even have the guts to come out and seriously argue for that— preferring instead to retain the option to pretend you were only joking when someone calls you out for it.

This is all very good. It means you're not making much progress transmitting extremist ideology into the mainstream if you still have to pretend like you're only joking when you make arguments for mass search and seizure, deportations, intermnents, eliminations, whatever it is you really think— when you're speaking seriously— is the appropriate policy you want to see adopted.

By the way, what is the appropriate policy in your mind? Seriously.

s9So let me get th... (Below threshold)

s9

So let me get this straight

making assumptions about individuals based largely on group characteristics is OK as long it is for the BENEFIT of individuals who belong in that group regardless of any individual merit (ie extra points on civil service tests, quota set asides in fire/police departments, scholarships, etc)

but is it crass, forbidden, an insult to intelligence to do the same when dealing with the demographics of an ideology that preaches and carries out murderous intent (and has succeeded) against the west.

No urban legend that the FBI was more afeared of offending the pc sensibilities of the ACLU then looking into the flight training of young men from the middle east.

:::sigh:::

unfortunately, s9, the next "miss" that leads to death in the US and I believe you'll be still saying "but what about McVeigh and Eric Rudolph! What about them, huh? huh?"

Darleen writes: m... (Below threshold)
s9:

Darleen writes: making assumptions about individuals based largely on group characteristics is OK as long it is for the BENEFIT of individuals who belong in that group regardless of any individual merit (ie extra points on civil service tests, quota set asides in fire/police departments, scholarships, etc)

What the fsck are you talking about?

I think you might be making some premature assumptions about my thoughts on affirmative action before you've heard me expound on the subject.

I also think you must be insane if you believe that adjusting points down on civil service test, hiring limits in police and fire departments, limits on scholarship opportunity, etceters— are likely to have any positive effect toward countering terrorism.

I wrote: also think you... (Below threshold)
s9:

I wrote: also think you must be insane if you believe that adjusting points down on civil service test, hiring limits in police and fire departments, limits on scholarship opportunity, etcetera...

Or did you have some other policy in mind for singling out a particular group for special treatment in countering terrorism?

Actually <a href="... (Below threshold)
Sabba Hillel:

Actually

http://littlegreenfootballs.com/weblog/?entry=16845#c0009

#9 Necklace of Shoes 7/28/2005 08:06AM PDT I see this folly on a regular basis. WINS radio "With more listeners than any other station in America" broadcast the other day police would be searching every xth person at train station Y. Then yesterday they broadcast a new detector would be used at airport Z and even gave which terminal.
Here's a concept. Ban ALL ... (Below threshold)
John S.:

Here's a concept. Ban ALL Arabic men from NYC subways. Easy. No searches. They can either walk or move to NJ.

You hit the nail on the hea... (Below threshold)
moseby:

You hit the nail on the head John S. When these "innocent" ay-rabs get tired of their miserable lot-in-life here in the US maybe they'll stop turning a blind eye to the terror financing and bomb planning that goes on in their mosks.

I probably didn't spell "mosk" correctly but who the eff cares? It's time for my daily "shitting on the koran" routine...




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