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Karl Rove: wonderful human being who's kind to children and puppies

I've been reading around about Hurricane Katrina and the federal response, and I gotta tell ya -- I have newfound respect for Karl Rove.

First, he steered a hurricane into almost -- but not quite -- scoring a direct hit on New Orleans.

Then, he arranged for a couple of the dikes to collapse the day after the storm.

Then, he engineered the mayor of New Orleans (a Democrat) into utterly abandoning the city's evacuation plan -- a plan Rove had sabotaged into utter ineffectiveness long before.

Next, he coerced Louisiana's governor (a Democrat) into stalling on the state's response, hemming and hawing until the worst of the disaster had passed. He also got her to order the National Guard to keep the American Red Cross from delivering food, water, and ice to the people stranded at the Superdome.

The only part of his plan that didn't work was when some boob at FEMA didn't swoop in and save the day as fast as everyone demanded, letting the federal government play the hero. At that point, Rove reached into his files (which I suspect he acquired from J. Edgar Hoover), took out the proof that Michael Brown had lied on his resume', and promptly threw him to the wolves at Time Magazine.

Man, he's scary. I ain't never gonna say nothing bad about Turd Blossom ever again.


Comments (14)

Can anyone explain why two ... (Below threshold)

Can anyone explain why two lesbians have got mixed up with the flooding of New Orleans?

I think we should be told!

The really cool parts of wh... (Below threshold)

The really cool parts of what Rove pulled off were the way he made that same hurricane cross Florida and staged such a good response from Fema there. That's the best example of Rove's powers at work. You'd almost think he's managed to lay his diabolical hands on Kerry's magic hat.

You forgot about how he man... (Below threshold)

You forgot about how he managed to kill Justioce Rehnquist the following week for his encore...

If George W. Bush isn't god... (Below threshold)

If George W. Bush isn't god to the liberals (and I think he is...they think he's responsible for everything under the sun), then surely it is Karl Rove. Just in case there was any failure with Operation Katrina Destroys Blue City, Rove has Ophelia circling off the coast to draw attention away from the Katrina situation if things get too hot for the administration. You'll notice how it was steaming for landfall when things looked grim, but now, as more facts emerge about Mayor Nagin and Gov. Blanco, he has it just sitting off the coast in readiness. He's a baaaaad man.

Just read a report that the... (Below threshold)
KobeClan:

Just read a report that the Salvation Army was also refused entry into New Orleans. Karl sure was busy.

Wow. He does this and does... (Below threshold)

Wow. He does this and doesn't wear a robe or carry wizard's staff.

Man, they (llliberals) must... (Below threshold)

Man, they (llliberals) must be terrified that he'll issue order 66, and mop them all up

Speaking of abandoned evacu... (Below threshold)
AnonymousDrivel:

Speaking of abandoned evacuation plans, you just have to do a compare and contrast with John From Wuzzadem's take on the weekend's FOXNews Q&A with Senator M. Landrieu and the real thing via The Political Teen's "Senator Mary Landrieu (D- LA) Spins on FOX News Sunday (VIDEO)". I defy anyone to spot which one is the satire. Unbelievable. Too funny (in a pathetic way) for words. She spun so hard that I'll bet she threw up off camera. No wait... she did some of that on camera too.

Soon-to-be-Ex-Senator Landreau may want to ask Mr. Rove to lay his hand on her shoulder... you know, for the healing.

Also, I have it on good aut... (Below threshold)

Also, I have it on good authority that Mr. Rove personally blocked all those Red Cross trucks loaded with supplies for the Superdome refugees, like that dude who faced down a line of tanks in Tiannanmen Square in 1989.

Karl Rove kicked my puppy a... (Below threshold)

Karl Rove kicked my puppy and saved us the cost of taking him to the vet to be neutered.

Now there are rumors that K... (Below threshold)
Jeff:

Now there are rumors that Karl Rove is indeed the anti-christ. But my money is still on either Martha Stewart or Thomas Kincaid...

Karl received his powers af... (Below threshold)
Brad Eleven:

Karl received his powers after enduring a horrible beating at the age of eight from a ten-year-old girl. She disagreed with the Nixon sticker he'd put on his bike. Since this time, he has wielded superhuman powers of innuendo, rumormongering, and the supernatural ability to embed negative information in survey questions.

"Always there are two, a master and an apprentice." -- Yoda

Karl Rove did this to cover... (Below threshold)

Karl Rove did this to cover up the various crimes against other religions that the Gazans are now engaged in.

Because being good to Gazans means oil from those who pay for the Gazans...

Wait. Tony Blair just offered them NINE BILLION DOLLARS. And Condi Rice keeps giving them checks.

Does this mean we're getting all out Middle East oil from... ourselves?

Now I'm confused.

I DON'T respect him at ALL ... (Below threshold)
plubbaplubba:

I DON'T respect him at ALL much really.
I can hardly think of anyone I respect less anyway (that's not already in jail).

But watch the ratings go up NOW folks !

They've already been hinting at rising (Bush #s).
And now you might try to think of this as a kind of "turnaround" tuesday. Any serious doubts here?
(Not if you've gotten to "know" Rove.) It's impressive. But I don't go near calling it respect, -what my regard for him is.




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