A Portsmouth, New Hampshire man recently got caught in a handicapped parking spot. That was a $100 fine, and it was a bit more than he felt like paying. So he got out his trusty pen and re-wrote the ticket into a $20.00 no parking zone violation, then mailed it in.
Unfortunately for this budding artist, the police happened to check his copy with the original ticket -- and his brilliant scheme unravelled on him.
That $80 he tried to save himself now has him facing felony forgery charges, and could cost him the next 3 1/2 to 7 years of his life.
Mr. Shufro tried to explain to the judge that it was "just a parking violation," but the judge corrected him that altering an official government document -- even a parking ticket -- is a bad thing.
(Insert "but it was just about sex" Clinton comparison here)
Comments (20)
Unless your Sandy Berger.</... (Below threshold)1. Posted by John | December 17, 2005 11:57 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Unless your Sandy Berger.
1. Posted by John | December 17, 2005 11:57 AM |
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Posted on December 17, 2005 11:57
2. Posted by Bat One | December 17, 2005 12:16 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
I have always had a special animosity for those lazy individuals who take handicapped parking spaces... particualrly as so many of them are the ones who most need the exercise. One way I have found to deal with my resentment toward these slugs is to remove the valve stem cap of one of their tires, let out the air, replace the cap, and then, because no one carries 2 spare tires, repeat the process on another tire.
As there has been no physical damage done, it would be difficult to argue for any criminal charge but malicious mischief, and I have yet to find a judge who would be willing under the circumstances to even entertain the thought of a fine.
2. Posted by Bat One | December 17, 2005 12:16 PM |
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Posted on December 17, 2005 12:16
3. Posted by Just Me | December 17, 2005 3:24 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Idiot.
He shouldn't have been parked in the handicapped zone, but when he got caught he should have accepted the punishment for the crime and moved on.
I can't help but wonder if his mom didn't do his homework for him, and make excuses to his teacher, when he misbehaved.
3. Posted by Just Me | December 17, 2005 3:24 PM |
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Posted on December 17, 2005 15:24
4. Posted by joe | December 17, 2005 5:59 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Dave Barry once wrote that there should be roving medical teams with large, scary instruments to examine any unhandicapped people who park in handicapped spots. The idea was simple: after the exam, you WOULD qualify for the handicapped spot.
4. Posted by joe | December 17, 2005 5:59 PM |
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Posted on December 17, 2005 17:59
5. Posted by Tom | December 17, 2005 6:41 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
The idiot is guilty of breaking the law (twice) and should pay for it as the law dictates. Then all those unused handicapped parking spaces should be converted to planters for attractive, environmentally correct trees and shrubs (preferably of flowering varieties). Alternatively, the space that's wasted by all those unused parking spaces could be metered for general use at, say, $5 an hour. (I have no doubt that the spaces would be in almost constant use by (mostly) honest drivers.) The proceeds could then be used to provide taxi rides for handicapped drivers, most of whom (in my experience) are a menace to society.
5. Posted by Tom | December 17, 2005 6:41 PM |
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Posted on December 17, 2005 18:41
6. Posted by joe | December 17, 2005 6:47 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
The proceeds could then be used to provide taxi rides for handicapped drivers, most of whom (in my experience) are a menace to society.
You, sir, are an ASSHOLE.
6. Posted by joe | December 17, 2005 6:47 PM |
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Posted on December 17, 2005 18:47
7. Posted by Mac Lorry | December 17, 2005 7:51 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
I got a ticket once for parking in a handicap spot, but I actually parked a motorcycle in a pedestrian area adjacent to the handicap zone. I didn't feel I should pay $100 bucks so I went to the court house and filled out a written explanation that was then given to a judge to decide. When I got the results the fine had be dropped to $5. If you think you have been unjustly fined, work within the system. If you are willing to compromise (accept some fault) most judges will give you a break.
7. Posted by Mac Lorry | December 17, 2005 7:51 PM |
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Posted on December 17, 2005 19:51
8. Posted by OC Chuck | December 17, 2005 8:08 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
If you are caught with the outside tread of your tire touching the outside of a blue line of a handicapped space (even the pedestrian part), you are subject to a ticket. Steer clear.
8. Posted by OC Chuck | December 17, 2005 8:08 PM |
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Posted on December 17, 2005 20:08
9. Posted by Tom | December 17, 2005 8:44 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Joe, you are obviously a gentleman, a scholar, and a valuable member of society. But you haven't been paying attention to the driving habits of persons with handicapped license plates.
9. Posted by Tom | December 17, 2005 8:44 PM |
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Posted on December 17, 2005 20:44
10. Posted by joe | December 17, 2005 8:57 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Actually, I know a young lady with just such plates. And she deals daily with assholes like you blocking her in, taking reserved spots, and generally engaging in asshattery.
And I'm guessing she drives better than you.
10. Posted by joe | December 17, 2005 8:57 PM |
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Posted on December 17, 2005 20:57
11. Posted by Punster | December 17, 2005 10:35 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
And who did the erasure for Plame to get Flame? Or, is it Palme? And what city presents increased acuteness(chronisity?) of handicap from similar shenanigans as our friend in Portland played?
Doh!
11. Posted by Punster | December 17, 2005 10:35 PM |
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Posted on December 17, 2005 22:35
12. Posted by merc | December 17, 2005 10:42 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Joe,
I fail to see what the problem is. Tom clearly clarified his statement with "in my experience." As such, he wasn't making a blatant "all handicapped people are menaces to society when driving" as you, apparently, are charging that he has.
If I state that the old people I've seen driving are horrible at it, that does not mean that I think all old people are horrible drivers.
You've basically done # 1 here: http://dilbertblog.typepad.com/the_dilbert_blog/2005/11/results_of_why_.html
At any rate, calling Tom an asshole for his opinion is certainly out of line. That's a guaranteed way to not have anyone view your opinions as possessing much merit.
12. Posted by merc | December 17, 2005 10:42 PM |
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Posted on December 17, 2005 22:42
13. Posted by Mike | December 18, 2005 11:30 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
A wooden toothpick inserted in and then broken off in the door lock mechanism can work wonders--not that I would advocate such behavior.
13. Posted by Mike | December 18, 2005 11:30 AM |
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Posted on December 18, 2005 11:30
14. Posted by John S | December 18, 2005 8:38 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Worse for Mr. Shufro, he almost certainly will spend time in jail. This is N.H. There is no real crime here but we, for some reason, spend hundreds of millions of tax dollars on law enforcement.
So there's plenty of room in the state prison and Mr. Shufro can look forward to five years of bunking with a pedophile.
14. Posted by John S | December 18, 2005 8:38 PM |
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Posted on December 18, 2005 20:38
15. Posted by Macker | December 19, 2005 1:21 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
It depends on what the meaning of the word "is," is. Heheheheheheheh....
15. Posted by Macker | December 19, 2005 1:21 AM |
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Posted on December 19, 2005 01:21
16. Posted by Punsmith | December 19, 2005 12:03 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
John:
I know what you mean about not having any crime in NH. How about the Dartmouth professor shot? Also, two kids were found in Ohio this week where they had been laying peacefully in a field for two years after being shot by their NH father. And, how about all those drugs floating around the ski areas? Please - no crime in NH! Hah!
16. Posted by Punsmith | December 19, 2005 12:03 PM |
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Posted on December 19, 2005 12:03
17. Posted by ProCynic | December 19, 2005 1:31 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
I dunno. There is an increasingly large portion of society who are getting sick of the handicapped parking spaces. There seem to be more ... and more ... and more ... and more of these spaces. Way too many for the number of handicapped drivers, or at least for the people who are legally entitled to use them. They also have them in the dumbest places, like outside of a DANCE STUDIO or outside the front office of a hotel. The concept, while sound, has been abused, so people no longer respect them.
17. Posted by ProCynic | December 19, 2005 1:31 PM |
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Posted on December 19, 2005 13:31
18. Posted by frankr | December 19, 2005 1:38 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
I believe it is way too easy to get a handicapped plaque or license plate. I was in a motorcycle accident about 25 years ago, and lost all the toes on my right foot. I park in the regular parking spaces because I don't believe in special treatment, and would never get handicapped plates or plaques. Besides, if I got out of a car with handicapped plates, I would receive nothing but dirty looks!!!
18. Posted by frankr | December 19, 2005 1:38 PM |
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Posted on December 19, 2005 13:38
19. Posted by John S | December 20, 2005 8:45 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Punsmith:
N.H. does in fact have 6 to 10 murders each year. Pretty low for a population of 1.5 million. (Boston managed that number last weekend.) You examples you cited span 10 years. Most small N.H. towns haven’t seen a murder since the Indian raids of the 1740s. As for the Dartmouth murders, those were a couple of local crazies, if I remember correctly. The press never mentions that their first intended victim answered the door brandishing a shotgun. The pukes decided to go elsewhere, finding a pair of naive liberals to slaughter.
19. Posted by John S | December 20, 2005 8:45 AM |
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Posted on December 20, 2005 08:45
20. Posted by Punsmith | December 21, 2005 2:31 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
You're right about that, John S.. However, how about the high rate of speeding snowmobiles? Or, lichen trampling in the third degree? How about in Manchester? I guess NH's density isn't as high as Ohio's (Taft). Plus, racial tensions aren't very high around The General Store.
20. Posted by Punsmith | December 21, 2005 2:31 PM |
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Posted on December 21, 2005 14:31