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Wizbang Weekend Caption Contest™

Posted by Kevin

Published: April 14, 2006 - 7:00 AM

It's Friday, which means it's time for the Wizbang Weekend Caption Contest™. Enter your best caption for the following picture:

In this photo released by Playboy, Playboy founder Hugh Hefner, poses with Paris Hilton as he celebrates his 80th birthday at the Playboy Mansion in the Holmby Hills area of Los Angeles, Saturday night, April 8, 2006. (AP Photo/Playboy, James Trevenen)


Winners will be announced Sunday.


Update: Winners announced. Click the link to read the winning entries. The contest is now closed.

Note: Last week I mentioned that their would be prizes this week. It turns out I was wrong about that. The prizes are for another contest coming next week.

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Comments (80)

Emperor Palpatine sure does... (Below threshold)

1. Posted by Bryan | April 14, 2006 7:10 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Bryan:

Emperor Palpatine sure does get some hot chicks!

1. Posted by Bryan | April 14, 2006 7:10 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on April 14, 2006 07:10

Viagra announces a new 500m... (Below threshold)

2. Posted by Corky Boyd | April 14, 2006 7:24 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Corky Boyd:

Viagra announces a new 500mg megadose size with Hugh Hefner as it's spokesman.

2. Posted by Corky Boyd | April 14, 2006 7:24 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on April 14, 2006 07:24

Brought to you by Pfizer, m... (Below threshold)

3. Posted by Cybrludite | April 14, 2006 7:25 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Cybrludite:

Brought to you by Pfizer, makers of Viagra (sildenafil citrate).

3. Posted by Cybrludite | April 14, 2006 7:25 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on April 14, 2006 07:25

"Sweety, Why I knew your gr... (Below threshold)

4. Posted by retired military | April 14, 2006 7:32 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
retired military:

"Sweety, Why I knew your great grandmother when she was your age"

4. Posted by retired military | April 14, 2006 7:32 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on April 14, 2006 07:32

"I've been in Paris twice. ... (Below threshold)

5. Posted by pylorns | April 14, 2006 8:00 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
pylorns:

"I've been in Paris twice. Once when visiting the country... and.."

5. Posted by pylorns | April 14, 2006 8:00 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on April 14, 2006 08:00

Thought bubble from Hef: "E... (Below threshold)

6. Posted by Faith+1 | April 14, 2006 8:11 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Faith+1:

Thought bubble from Hef: "Even *I* wouldn't do this skank."

6. Posted by Faith+1 | April 14, 2006 8:11 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on April 14, 2006 08:11

"I've got scrotal warts old... (Below threshold)

7. Posted by Mr. Otis A. Block | April 14, 2006 8:27 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Mr. Otis A. Block:

"I've got scrotal warts older than her..."

7. Posted by Mr. Otis A. Block | April 14, 2006 8:27 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on April 14, 2006 08:27

While democratic candidate ... (Below threshold)

8. Posted by Robb | April 14, 2006 8:32 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Robb:

While democratic candidate Al Gore voices concern over global warming, surprise candidate Hugh Heffner expressed concern over only making Paris hot. Although no ice caps are repordly involved he's known as saying, "It's awfully wet down there."

8. Posted by Robb | April 14, 2006 8:32 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on April 14, 2006 08:32

Hugh: "Paris is soooo dumb,... (Below threshold)

9. Posted by JAT | April 14, 2006 8:39 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
JAT:

Hugh: "Paris is soooo dumb, she'll make a perfect playmate."

9. Posted by JAT | April 14, 2006 8:39 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on April 14, 2006 08:39

Heffner, who made a name fo... (Below threshold)

10. Posted by Maggie | April 14, 2006 8:44 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Maggie:

Heffner, who made a name for himself, meets Hilton, who destroyed a name by herself.

10. Posted by Maggie | April 14, 2006 8:44 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on April 14, 2006 08:44

The king of the space betwe... (Below threshold)

11. Posted by Tango | April 14, 2006 8:55 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Tango:

The king of the space between the box spring and mattress celebrates eighty years of superficiality with some walking vaginas.

11. Posted by Tango | April 14, 2006 8:55 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on April 14, 2006 08:55

"She's promised me her gran... (Below threshold)

12. Posted by Rick13 | April 14, 2006 8:56 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Rick13:

"She's promised me her granddaughter's hand in marriage!"

12. Posted by Rick13 | April 14, 2006 8:56 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on April 14, 2006 08:56

Celebrities attend the laun... (Below threshold)

13. Posted by BlogDog | April 14, 2006 8:58 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
BlogDog:

Celebrities attend the launch party of "Attention Whores" magazine.

13. Posted by BlogDog | April 14, 2006 8:58 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on April 14, 2006 08:58

Joint thought bubble:... (Below threshold)

14. Posted by Imhotep | April 14, 2006 9:05 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Imhotep:

Joint thought bubble:
"Thank God I don't have to do her/him!"

14. Posted by Imhotep | April 14, 2006 9:05 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on April 14, 2006 09:05

Headline: Fossil found near... (Below threshold)

15. Posted by Sinner | April 14, 2006 9:05 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Sinner:

Headline: Fossil found near Paris

15. Posted by Sinner | April 14, 2006 9:05 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on April 14, 2006 09:05

Heff "Hey Paris, I remember... (Below threshold)

16. Posted by Imhotep | April 14, 2006 9:07 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Imhotep:

Heff "Hey Paris, I remember when you could treat that type of VD with Penicillin alone!"

16. Posted by Imhotep | April 14, 2006 9:07 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on April 14, 2006 09:07

Paris: "Oooh leather. Oh H... (Below threshold)

17. Posted by Guido | April 14, 2006 9:08 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Guido:

Paris: "Oooh leather. Oh Heff, how did you know I was into leather?"
Heff: "Hey dumbass, that's my skin."

17. Posted by Guido | April 14, 2006 9:08 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on April 14, 2006 09:08

Paris Hilton, recently cast... (Below threshold)

18. Posted by docjim505 | April 14, 2006 9:08 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
docjim505:

Paris Hilton, recently cast to portray Mother Theresa by Indian film director T. Rajeevnath, at a pre-production party with co-star Hugh Hefner, who will portray Pope John Paul II.

18. Posted by docjim505 | April 14, 2006 9:08 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on April 14, 2006 09:08

"Somebody remind me -- what... (Below threshold)

19. Posted by McGehee | April 14, 2006 9:18 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
McGehee:

"Somebody remind me -- what am I supposed to do with one of these?"

19. Posted by McGehee | April 14, 2006 9:18 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on April 14, 2006 09:18

Hi, sweetie. I used to be f... (Below threshold)

20. Posted by elvis | April 14, 2006 9:31 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
elvis:

Hi, sweetie. I used to be friends with your father.

20. Posted by elvis | April 14, 2006 9:31 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on April 14, 2006 09:31

Hefner chosen to replace Ni... (Below threshold)

21. Posted by Tim | April 14, 2006 9:31 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Tim:

Hefner chosen to replace Nicole Richie in next season's Simple Life.

21. Posted by Tim | April 14, 2006 9:31 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on April 14, 2006 09:31

"My daughter was right. I a... (Below threshold)

22. Posted by wavemaker | April 14, 2006 9:31 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
wavemaker:

"My daughter was right. I am getting desperate."

22. Posted by wavemaker | April 14, 2006 9:31 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on April 14, 2006 09:31

Heff thought bubble: I'll b... (Below threshold)

23. Posted by lakestate | April 14, 2006 9:46 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
lakestate:

Heff thought bubble: I'll bet no one else has a lifelike blow-up doll of Paris Hilton... and it's even smarter than the real thing!

23. Posted by lakestate | April 14, 2006 9:46 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on April 14, 2006 09:46

"The Ore Might Be Old But I... (Below threshold)

24. Posted by radio free fred | April 14, 2006 9:52 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
radio free fred:

"The Ore Might Be Old But It's Got A Few Strokes Left In It."

24. Posted by radio free fred | April 14, 2006 9:52 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on April 14, 2006 09:52

Both are famous for behavin... (Below threshold)

25. Posted by jim | April 14, 2006 10:01 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
jim:

Both are famous for behaving in the public eye like the 15-year olds they both are, though one in Base 75 and the other in Base 20.

25. Posted by jim | April 14, 2006 10:01 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on April 14, 2006 10:01

A skank in the hand, is wor... (Below threshold)

26. Posted by fustian | April 14, 2006 10:04 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
fustian:

A skank in the hand, is worth 72 ugly virgins in an afterlife: why Hef will never be a suicice bomber.

26. Posted by fustian | April 14, 2006 10:04 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on April 14, 2006 10:04

No, Paris... I AM your fath... (Below threshold)

27. Posted by Scott | April 14, 2006 10:08 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Scott:

No, Paris... I AM your father!

27. Posted by Scott | April 14, 2006 10:08 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on April 14, 2006 10:08

Heff: "I've never stayed in... (Below threshold)

28. Posted by No One of Consequence | April 14, 2006 10:10 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
No One of Consequence:

Heff: "I've never stayed in a Hilton before"

28. Posted by No One of Consequence | April 14, 2006 10:10 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on April 14, 2006 10:10

A new third political party... (Below threshold)

29. Posted by yetanotherjohn | April 14, 2006 10:20 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
yetanotherjohn:

A new third political party announced its 2008 presidential candidates who combine 'the wisdom that comes with age and the vigor that bubbles up from youth'. No decision yet on who would be on top of the ticket.

29. Posted by yetanotherjohn | April 14, 2006 10:20 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on April 14, 2006 10:20

Face it, you are jealous. W... (Below threshold)

30. Posted by yetanotherjohn | April 14, 2006 10:22 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
yetanotherjohn:

Face it, you are jealous. Who wouldn't want to hit that? Of course, I'm not sure what's in it for Hef.

30. Posted by yetanotherjohn | April 14, 2006 10:22 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on April 14, 2006 10:22

Finally, a couple that repu... (Below threshold)

31. Posted by Cox | April 14, 2006 10:37 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Cox:

Finally, a couple that repulses both men and women, gay or straight. We are one step closer to a nation united, as all of America says "Eww!"

31. Posted by Cox | April 14, 2006 10:37 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on April 14, 2006 10:37

The winner of the World Sel... (Below threshold)

32. Posted by Dave Schuler | April 14, 2006 10:49 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Dave Schuler:

The winner of the World Self-Parody Contest congratulates the first runner-up.

32. Posted by Dave Schuler | April 14, 2006 10:49 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on April 14, 2006 10:49

Congratulations Old Codger ... (Below threshold)

33. Posted by JEFF | April 14, 2006 10:51 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
JEFF:

Congratulations Old Codger ,Your the 1,000,000th customer to the wino vd lingerie brothel!

1ST PRIZE a slightly used b grade heiress!

33. Posted by JEFF | April 14, 2006 10:51 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on April 14, 2006 10:51

"Wiltin' and Hilton"<... (Below threshold)

34. Posted by heymike | April 14, 2006 11:06 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
heymike:

"Wiltin' and Hilton"

34. Posted by heymike | April 14, 2006 11:06 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on April 14, 2006 11:06

"And the Wizbang Weekend Ca... (Below threshold)

35. Posted by Rachel Edith | April 14, 2006 11:17 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Rachel Edith:

"And the Wizbang Weekend Caption Contest™ Loser gets to have dinner with these two."

35. Posted by Rachel Edith | April 14, 2006 11:17 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on April 14, 2006 11:17

So many whores, so little t... (Below threshold)

36. Posted by jfh | April 14, 2006 11:23 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
jfh:

So many whores, so little time left

36. Posted by jfh | April 14, 2006 11:23 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on April 14, 2006 11:23

This is a fine example of t... (Below threshold)

37. Posted by virgo | April 14, 2006 12:04 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
virgo:

This is a fine example of the Hilton Hotel chains new hot tubs private parts washer, stutters the curmudgeonly mummy! only the sanitation system needs a lot of work!

37. Posted by virgo | April 14, 2006 12:04 PM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on April 14, 2006 12:04

As many skanks as I've been... (Below threshold)

38. Posted by skymuse | April 14, 2006 12:07 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
skymuse:

As many skanks as I've been with, and this one even disgusts *me*.....oh well, where's the Viagra?

38. Posted by skymuse | April 14, 2006 12:07 PM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on April 14, 2006 12:07

Dear, are you a Gershwin fa... (Below threshold)

39. Posted by Jim in Cleveland | April 14, 2006 12:20 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Jim in Cleveland:

Dear, are you a Gershwin fan? Because I think you would just love "An American in Paris."

39. Posted by Jim in Cleveland | April 14, 2006 12:20 PM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on April 14, 2006 12:20

"That $20 crack whore I scr... (Below threshold)

40. Posted by physics geek | April 14, 2006 12:32 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
physics geek:

"That $20 crack whore I screwed last night seems classy compared to this skank."

40. Posted by physics geek | April 14, 2006 12:32 PM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on April 14, 2006 12:32

The lives of both were buil... (Below threshold)

41. Posted by jim | April 14, 2006 12:37 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
jim:

The lives of both were built on bedding.

41. Posted by jim | April 14, 2006 12:37 PM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on April 14, 2006 12:37

Plastered with Paris.... (Below threshold)

42. Posted by Jeff | April 14, 2006 12:43 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Jeff:

Plastered with Paris.

42. Posted by Jeff | April 14, 2006 12:43 PM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on April 14, 2006 12:43

Hmmm.A disgusting ... (Below threshold)

43. Posted by ed | April 14, 2006 1:30 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
ed:

Hmmm.

A disgusting disease-ridden reprobate has her picture taken with Hugh Hefner.

43. Posted by ed | April 14, 2006 1:30 PM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on April 14, 2006 13:30

Please send a hillbilly sex... (Below threshold)

44. Posted by Scrapiron | April 14, 2006 1:41 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Scrapiron:

Please send a hillbilly sexual aid. Two popcicle sticks and some duct tape.

44. Posted by Scrapiron | April 14, 2006 1:41 PM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on April 14, 2006 13:41

Ah, so many Casblance quote... (Below threshold)

45. Posted by ken | April 14, 2006 1:48 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
ken:

Ah, so many Casblance quotes to change, so little time.

Major Strasser: Are you one of those people who cannot imagine Hefner in their beloved Paris?
Rick: She's not particularly my beloved Paris.


Rick: I wouldn't bring up Paris if I were you, it's poor salesmanship.

Hef: We'll always have Paris. Everybody. All the time.

45. Posted by ken | April 14, 2006 1:48 PM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on April 14, 2006 13:48

You will never find a more ... (Below threshold)

46. Posted by Rodney Dill | April 14, 2006 2:03 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Rodney Dill:

You will never find a more wretched hive of scum and villainy.

46. Posted by Rodney Dill | April 14, 2006 2:03 PM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on April 14, 2006 14:03

"Gee, I thought you were mu... (Below threshold)

47. Posted by Rodney Dill | April 14, 2006 2:03 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Rodney Dill:

"Gee, I thought you were much fatter, Senator Kennedy."

47. Posted by Rodney Dill | April 14, 2006 2:03 PM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on April 14, 2006 14:03

Hef always did enjoy Spr... (Below threshold)

48. Posted by Lindy R. Dole | April 14, 2006 2:05 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Lindy R. Dole:

Hef always did enjoy Springtime in the Paris.

48. Posted by Lindy R. Dole | April 14, 2006 2:05 PM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on April 14, 2006 14:05

Even Hef wouldn't spend "On... (Below threshold)

49. Posted by Jason | April 14, 2006 2:48 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Jason:

Even Hef wouldn't spend "One Night in Paris."

49. Posted by Jason | April 14, 2006 2:48 PM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on April 14, 2006 14:48

Hef: "This picture has Wizb... (Below threshold)

50. Posted by Mighty Dwight | April 14, 2006 2:57 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Mighty Dwight:

Hef: "This picture has Wizbang Weekend Caption Contest written all over it."

50. Posted by Mighty Dwight | April 14, 2006 2:57 PM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on April 14, 2006 14:57

When I said "give me a pict... (Below threshold)

51. Posted by Bob | April 14, 2006 3:55 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Bob:

When I said "give me a picture of a girl with three boobs" I never expected you to find one.

51. Posted by Bob | April 14, 2006 3:55 PM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on April 14, 2006 15:55

Nothing beats early check-i... (Below threshold)

52. Posted by Bob Jones | April 14, 2006 4:03 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Bob Jones:

Nothing beats early check-in privileges at the Paris Hilton!

52. Posted by Bob Jones | April 14, 2006 4:03 PM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on April 14, 2006 16:03

Celebrating his 80th birthd... (Below threshold)

53. Posted by smitty | April 14, 2006 4:15 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
smitty:

Celebrating his 80th birthday, Hefner jumps out of a cake at the MTV Spring Break party.

53. Posted by smitty | April 14, 2006 4:15 PM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on April 14, 2006 16:15

Something oldSomethi... (Below threshold)

54. Posted by McCain | April 14, 2006 4:27 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
McCain:

Something old
Something new
Something furrowed
Something blew.

54. Posted by McCain | April 14, 2006 4:27 PM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on April 14, 2006 16:27

Hef is speechless after be... (Below threshold)

55. Posted by MoeCurryLarry | April 14, 2006 4:41 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
MoeCurryLarry:

Hef is speechless after being chosen as keynote speaker at the 1st annual STD awards being held at the Playboy Mansion !

55. Posted by MoeCurryLarry | April 14, 2006 4:41 PM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on April 14, 2006 16:41

"Twenty-Three? Too old for ... (Below threshold)

56. Posted by Steve Doherty Jr. | April 14, 2006 5:19 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Steve Doherty Jr.:

"Twenty-Three? Too old for me sweet thing; as soon as this jackass snaps this photo, grab your gear and get the hell out of my mansion!
Twenty-Three! Can you imagine?"

56. Posted by Steve Doherty Jr. | April 14, 2006 5:19 PM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on April 14, 2006 17:19

One night in Paris makes a ... (Below threshold)

57. Posted by Teflon93 | April 14, 2006 5:42 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Teflon93:

One night in Paris makes a hard man humble.

57. Posted by Teflon93 | April 14, 2006 5:42 PM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on April 14, 2006 17:42

Reporter : "Heff Heff what... (Below threshold)

58. Posted by retired military | April 14, 2006 5:56 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
retired military:

Reporter : "Heff Heff what kind of conversation could you possibly have with this young lady?"

Heffner : "The Vagina Monologues"

58. Posted by retired military | April 14, 2006 5:56 PM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on April 14, 2006 17:56

A photojournalism first: wa... (Below threshold)

59. Posted by McGehee | April 14, 2006 5:59 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
McGehee:

A photojournalism first: wax on silicone.

59. Posted by McGehee | April 14, 2006 5:59 PM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on April 14, 2006 17:59

Paris Hilton and Hugh Hefne... (Below threshold)

60. Posted by cliff | April 14, 2006 6:42 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
cliff:

Paris Hilton and Hugh Hefner pose together after each received the coveted "Most Recognized Grotto" award from the National Cave Explorers Society.

60. Posted by cliff | April 14, 2006 6:42 PM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on April 14, 2006 18:42

The Portrait of Dorian Hefn... (Below threshold)

61. Posted by c | April 14, 2006 6:55 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
c:

The Portrait of Dorian Hefner.

61. Posted by c | April 14, 2006 6:55 PM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on April 14, 2006 18:55

And then Boogie delivered t... (Below threshold)

62. Posted by McCain | April 14, 2006 11:46 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
McCain:

And then Boogie delivered the famous line,
"We will always have Paris."

62. Posted by McCain | April 14, 2006 11:46 PM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on April 14, 2006 23:46

Hef: Sigh, have I really su... (Below threshold)

63. Posted by Jeremy | April 15, 2006 12:26 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Jeremy:

Hef: Sigh, have I really sunk this low? I started Playboy, not Maxim.

63. Posted by Jeremy | April 15, 2006 12:26 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on April 15, 2006 00:26

Following their silent deli... (Below threshold)

64. Posted by Barry Dauphin | April 15, 2006 12:34 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Barry Dauphin:

Following their silent delivery, Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes pose for photographers outside the L. Ron Hubbard Maternity Ward.

64. Posted by Barry Dauphin | April 15, 2006 12:34 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on April 15, 2006 00:34

"It's good ta be da king."<... (Below threshold)

65. Posted by KiMonarrez | April 15, 2006 12:36 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
KiMonarrez:

"It's good ta be da king."

65. Posted by KiMonarrez | April 15, 2006 12:36 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on April 15, 2006 00:36

The smell of Codfish and a ... (Below threshold)

66. Posted by Arcticman Speaks | April 15, 2006 2:27 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Arcticman Speaks:

The smell of Codfish and a fully loaded Depends hung heavily in the air that night.

66. Posted by Arcticman Speaks | April 15, 2006 2:27 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on April 15, 2006 02:27

Headline:"Hefner S... (Below threshold)

67. Posted by The Random Yak | April 15, 2006 3:18 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
The Random Yak:

Headline:

"Hefner Spends 80th Birthday in Paris"

67. Posted by The Random Yak | April 15, 2006 3:18 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on April 15, 2006 03:18

Hugh Hefner cashes in his H... (Below threshold)

68. Posted by Teflon93 | April 15, 2006 8:51 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Teflon93:

Hugh Hefner cashes in his Hilton frequent guest points.

68. Posted by Teflon93 | April 15, 2006 8:51 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on April 15, 2006 08:51

"Money Talks And B.S. Walks... (Below threshold)

69. Posted by radio free fred | April 15, 2006 9:33 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
radio free fred:

"Money Talks And B.S. Walks."

69. Posted by radio free fred | April 15, 2006 9:33 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on April 15, 2006 09:33

"I didn't say 'and' I said ... (Below threshold)

70. Posted by Rodney Dill | April 15, 2006 9:56 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Rodney Dill:

"I didn't say 'and' I said do you want to go 'to' Bangkok?"

70. Posted by Rodney Dill | April 15, 2006 9:56 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on April 15, 2006 09:56

The Hugh Hefner Stress Test... (Below threshold)

71. Posted by radio free fred | April 15, 2006 10:41 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
radio free fred:

The Hugh Hefner Stress Test

71. Posted by radio free fred | April 15, 2006 10:41 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on April 15, 2006 10:41

Ginko Viagra - Helps you re... (Below threshold)

72. Posted by Adjustah | April 15, 2006 1:41 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Adjustah:

Ginko Viagra - Helps you remember who the f**k you were doing. Who are you again, Sweetie?

72. Posted by Adjustah | April 15, 2006 1:41 PM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on April 15, 2006 13:41

Hef and Paris share a mome... (Below threshold)

73. Posted by KAMIKAZI | April 15, 2006 2:17 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
KAMIKAZI:

Hef and Paris share a moment in front of the papparazzi and she gently whispers in his ear, Hef hurry up and get me out of here ! your Dentures are still stuck !

73. Posted by KAMIKAZI | April 15, 2006 2:17 PM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on April 15, 2006 14:17

There once was a man from C... (Below threshold)

74. Posted by robert | April 16, 2006 1:59 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
robert:

There once was a man from Chicago
With a girl who was anything but slow
So when it comes to sin
There's room at the Inn
And the pictures should be out tomorrow

74. Posted by robert | April 16, 2006 1:59 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on April 16, 2006 01:59

Paris, Goddess of Herpes, s... (Below threshold)

75. Posted by Ken | April 16, 2006 12:43 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Ken:

Paris, Goddess of Herpes, solicits another victim under the pretense of learning French.

75. Posted by Ken | April 16, 2006 12:43 PM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on April 16, 2006 12:43

Upon meeting Captain Pitche... (Below threshold)

76. Posted by Ken | April 16, 2006 1:08 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Ken:

Upon meeting Captain Pitcher of the LAPD Vice Division, Paris says coyly, "Officer, you should give me a ticket .... I've been doin' over 80."


(Reference: http://www.lapdonline.org/lapd_command_staff/comm_bio_view/7657)

76. Posted by Ken | April 16, 2006 1:08 PM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on April 16, 2006 13:08

"With that many candles on ... (Below threshold)

77. Posted by Rodney Dill | April 16, 2006 7:28 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Rodney Dill:

"With that many candles on your cake we don't even need the flash, Hef."

77. Posted by Rodney Dill | April 16, 2006 7:28 PM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on April 16, 2006 19:28

A sated Hugh asks, "Guess w... (Below threshold)

78. Posted by La Mano | April 16, 2006 11:57 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
La Mano:

A sated Hugh asks, "Guess what my favorite thing is in Paris . . . . . and it's not the Eiffel Tower"

78. Posted by La Mano | April 16, 2006 11:57 PM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on April 16, 2006 23:57

When asked about Easter a g... (Below threshold)

79. Posted by Le Beret | April 17, 2006 12:07 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Le Beret:

When asked about Easter a glazed Heffner responded, "I spent the entire weekend in Paris."

79. Posted by Le Beret | April 17, 2006 12:07 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on April 17, 2006 00:07

Update: <... (Below threshold)

80. Posted by Kevin | April 17, 2006 1:38 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Kevin:

Update: Winners announced. Click the link to read the winning entries. The contest is now closed.

80. Posted by Kevin | April 17, 2006 1:38 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on April 17, 2006 01:38




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