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Going for the gold

While most of the time I find my dumb criminal stories out of Massachusetts, today I have a winner from right here in New Hampshire. It seems that a couple of lugheads on probation were a smidgen concerned about their drug tests, so they decided to do something about it.

No, not stay clean. Steal the evidence.


That's right. They broke into a state office and stole vials of human urine.

To say that prosecutors are p... er, peeved would be to put it mildly.

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Comments (9)

Well, they were arrested sh... (Below threshold)

Well, they were arrested shortly after the burglary, with evidence of their guilt upon them, so I suppose that makes them "piss-poor" thieves, anyway.

~~~~

More recently, meth addicts have collected the urine of their fellow users to either drink or refine and cook in order to get high on trace amounts of methamphetamine, according to a Feb. 2 newscast on WCCO in Minnesota.


The things people will do to steel their nerves enough to vote for Al Franken, eh?

I guess they should be glad... (Below threshold)
epador:

I guess they should be glad we don't commonly use stool samples.

That is one great headline.... (Below threshold)

That is one great headline.

Well, at least they didn't ... (Below threshold)
Matt:

Well, at least they didn't rob the sperm bank.

More recently, meth addi... (Below threshold)

More recently, meth addicts have collected the urine of their fellow users to either drink or refine and cook in order to get high on trace amounts of methamphetamine,...

EWWW!

I wonder what kind of drugs... (Below threshold)
tas:

I wonder what kind of drugs you have to be on to think this was a good idea.

I guess they shoul... (Below threshold)
I guess they should be glad we don't commonly use stool samples.

1. Then they'd be "crap burglars."

2. What a couple of shitheads.

3. Of course, they wouldn't be in this position if they had their shit together to begin with.

4. Their probation officer can tell them, "Don't do that shit."

5. I can hear the judge telling them: "You boys
are in deep doo-doo."

Thank you, I'll be here all week.

OregonM: my unspoken thoug... (Below threshold)
epador:

OregonM: my unspoken thoughts take wing at your keyboard. I wonder if in either case they'd be tempted to swallow the evidence?

BTW, about 30 years ago I worked at a hospital where Dr. Djerassi, a dedicated proponent of using High Dose Methotrexate, practiced with impunity. He used to brag that he had used over 80% of the world's supply of methotrexate to treat his patients. An unsubstantiated rumor was that his minions had begun collecting the urine of patients so treated to recycle the chemotherapy drug which is excreted in large amounts unchanged in the urine when given in gram doses (I saw doses often over 50 grams a patient, about 1000 times a typical dose). I think someone just had read Catch-22 too many times, but who knows?

Если так и не придумали что дарить, то Вам сюда :) <a... (Below threshold)

Если так и не придумали что дарить, то Вам сюда :)
магазин подарков адрес


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