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Comments (179)
These really are petitions ... (Below threshold)1. Posted by W.C. Green | March 23, 2007 7:27 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
These really are petitions against filthy song lyrics, but recycling is good for the planet.
1. Posted by W.C. Green | March 23, 2007 7:27 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 07:27
2. Posted by jay wills | March 23, 2007 7:29 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"Why, no, I'm not wearing any pants. Why do you ask?"
2. Posted by jay wills | March 23, 2007 7:29 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 07:29
3. Posted by JLawson | March 23, 2007 7:30 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Worship Me, for I will save you from Global Warming. You shall ride bicycles and buy carbon offset Indulgences, while I fly the skies and live large while spreading the message of living small.
3. Posted by JLawson | March 23, 2007 7:30 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 07:30
4. Posted by Teflon93 | March 23, 2007 7:31 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Only 3 carbon dioxide-eating giant redwoods were killed to make the labels for the cardboard boxes as my personal assistant was too busy fueling the charter jet I took to get here. But don't worry---I used the carbon allotment of a 3-yr-old boy in Uganda who will never have to worry about changing a lightbulb since he'll be prevented by Kyoto from ever using electricity.
All of which would have been prevented had you elected me in 2000, you rat b*st*rds.
4. Posted by Teflon93 | March 23, 2007 7:31 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 07:31
5. Posted by Rob LA Ca. | March 23, 2007 7:34 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
I've been working out , how's my butt look?
5. Posted by Rob LA Ca. | March 23, 2007 7:34 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 07:34
6. Posted by Bullwinkle | March 23, 2007 7:36 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
...then Al whipped it out to demonstrate his 'fever' to congress and Tipper.
6. Posted by Bullwinkle | March 23, 2007 7:36 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 07:36
7. Posted by retired military | March 23, 2007 7:41 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
But we have been eco-friendly in this effort. All this paper is made from recycled toilet paper and after the committee releases it back to me I am going to use it as fuel to warm my 30,000 square foot house.
7. Posted by retired military | March 23, 2007 7:41 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 07:41
8. Posted by sanssoucy | March 23, 2007 7:50 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"Al Gore presents the committee with two copies of his December, 2006 electric light bill."
8. Posted by sanssoucy | March 23, 2007 7:50 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 07:50
9. Posted by _Mike_ | March 23, 2007 7:52 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"Why, yes, Senator. We are recommending that Taco Bell be required to pay a flatulence offset tax."
9. Posted by _Mike_ | March 23, 2007 7:52 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 07:52
10. Posted by Palmateer | March 23, 2007 7:57 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"Stop the World - we want to get off."
10. Posted by Palmateer | March 23, 2007 7:57 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 07:57
11. Posted by Tim | March 23, 2007 8:00 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Tipper Gore: "OK I want everybody to hold their breath like Al is doing so we can drop the CO2 level.
11. Posted by Tim | March 23, 2007 8:00 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 08:00
12. Posted by fustian | March 23, 2007 8:01 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Al's new movie: An Incovenient Girth.
12. Posted by fustian | March 23, 2007 8:01 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 08:01
13. Posted by spypeach | March 23, 2007 8:02 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Several years later... Gore still trying to have the pregnant chads counted.
13. Posted by spypeach | March 23, 2007 8:02 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 08:02
14. Posted by fustian | March 23, 2007 8:05 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
You'll notice Al and Tipper are dressed warmly, since it's always cold wherever that dumb bastard goes.
14. Posted by fustian | March 23, 2007 8:05 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 08:05
15. Posted by fustian | March 23, 2007 8:06 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
What, these boxes? That's my lunch.
15. Posted by fustian | March 23, 2007 8:06 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 08:06
16. Posted by Brian the Adequate | March 23, 2007 8:07 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
500,000 signatures and only 489,000 are from I.P. Freely, Amanda Huggankiss or Anita Lay.
16. Posted by Brian the Adequate | March 23, 2007 8:07 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 08:07
17. Posted by fustian | March 23, 2007 8:08 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Mr. Stiff went to Washington.
17. Posted by fustian | March 23, 2007 8:08 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 08:08
18. Posted by Baron Von Ottomatic | March 23, 2007 8:08 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Al Gore declares the science settled after presenting his petition signed by 250,000 Americans ready to swear they've seen Manbearpig.
18. Posted by Baron Von Ottomatic | March 23, 2007 8:08 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 08:08
19. Posted by Baron Von Ottomatic | March 23, 2007 8:09 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
But you told me to bring my lunch, Madame Speaker...
19. Posted by Baron Von Ottomatic | March 23, 2007 8:09 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 08:09
20. Posted by fustian | March 23, 2007 8:12 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
The double-breasted, black-coated hypocrite is in its natural environment and starting to build a nest.
20. Posted by fustian | March 23, 2007 8:12 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 08:12
21. Posted by Baron Von Ottomatic | March 23, 2007 8:13 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
The personal electric use pledge was all political show, the order to stop releasing methane in the Senate chamber was serious - and poorly received by Mr Gore.
21. Posted by Baron Von Ottomatic | March 23, 2007 8:13 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 08:13
22. Posted by fustian | March 23, 2007 8:15 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
And I brought my Oscar as SCIENTIFIC EVIDENCE!
22. Posted by fustian | March 23, 2007 8:15 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 08:15
23. Posted by Baron Von Ottomatic | March 23, 2007 8:15 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
You see, I'm going to sneak up on Manbearpig and stick my thumb up his bunghole.
23. Posted by Baron Von Ottomatic | March 23, 2007 8:15 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 08:15
24. Posted by fustian | March 23, 2007 8:16 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Global warming mystery solved.
Gore's gotten so fat, it just feels warmer to him.
24. Posted by fustian | March 23, 2007 8:16 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 08:16
25. Posted by fustian | March 23, 2007 8:19 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
To my mind the best evidence that global warming is nonsense on stilts is that this guy is for it.
25. Posted by fustian | March 23, 2007 8:19 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 08:19
26. Posted by Rodney Dill | March 23, 2007 8:19 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
I've got my Carbon Offset's right here...
in my lockbox...
26. Posted by Rodney Dill | March 23, 2007 8:19 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 08:19
27. Posted by Rodney Dill | March 23, 2007 8:20 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
The Goracle of Smell High (to the heavens)
27. Posted by Rodney Dill | March 23, 2007 8:20 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 08:20
28. Posted by fustian | March 23, 2007 8:20 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
If it's supposed to get so hot in the future, how come Al's put on such a thick layer of insulating fat?
28. Posted by fustian | March 23, 2007 8:20 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 08:20
29. Posted by Stephen Macklin | March 23, 2007 8:21 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Step Right Up. Get your very own carbon offset. Save the world with just a piece of paper.
29. Posted by Stephen Macklin | March 23, 2007 8:21 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 08:21
30. Posted by Rodney Dill | March 23, 2007 8:21 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"We found the boxes of Florida votes that weren't counted in 2000, I am the President."
30. Posted by Rodney Dill | March 23, 2007 8:21 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 08:21
31. Posted by Baron Von Ottomatic | March 23, 2007 8:22 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Why yes, that is a foot-long double-meat hoagie in my pocket. And I am excited to be here.
31. Posted by Baron Von Ottomatic | March 23, 2007 8:22 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 08:22
32. Posted by Tim | March 23, 2007 8:23 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
....and in these boxes of my deleted scenes, is proof that heavy metal musicians are producing more CO2 than the rest of us. Read it and weep you oxygen eating Hell demons!
32. Posted by Tim | March 23, 2007 8:23 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 08:23
33. Posted by Rodney Dill | March 23, 2007 8:23 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"...and we only killed 32 trees to make copies of my 500 page plan for everyone here."
33. Posted by Rodney Dill | March 23, 2007 8:23 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 08:23
34. Posted by Bruce | March 23, 2007 8:24 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Sorry, I'm having trouble coming up with aything other than "Hypocritical, Arrogant, Socialist Asshole".
34. Posted by Bruce | March 23, 2007 8:24 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 08:24
35. Posted by Rance | March 23, 2007 8:24 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Mr. Chairman:
Today we would like to propose an alternative to fossil fuel. We believe that we can provide 15% of the nations energy needs just by burning the hanging chads in these boxes.
35. Posted by Rance | March 23, 2007 8:24 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 08:24
36. Posted by Stephen Macklin | March 23, 2007 8:25 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
The stick up my butt is to keep in the excess greenhouse gases. The bloating is an Unfortunate Side Effect.
36. Posted by Stephen Macklin | March 23, 2007 8:25 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 08:25
37. Posted by Baron Von Ottomatic | March 23, 2007 8:25 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Gore got so huge he found himself orbited by smaller syncophants.
37. Posted by Baron Von Ottomatic | March 23, 2007 8:25 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 08:25
38. Posted by Rodney Dill | March 23, 2007 8:26 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
An Incontinent Goof
38. Posted by Rodney Dill | March 23, 2007 8:26 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 08:26
39. Posted by Baron Von Ottomatic | March 23, 2007 8:27 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
When Al Gore sat around the hearing chamber, he sat AROUND the hearing chamber.
39. Posted by Baron Von Ottomatic | March 23, 2007 8:27 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 08:27
40. Posted by Stephen Macklin | March 23, 2007 8:27 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Senator, that is what we in the business call a "hanging carbon offset."
40. Posted by Stephen Macklin | March 23, 2007 8:27 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 08:27
41. Posted by Stephen Macklin | March 23, 2007 8:28 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Greenhouse gasses are a silent but deadly killer.
41. Posted by Stephen Macklin | March 23, 2007 8:28 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 08:28
42. Posted by Baron Von Ottomatic | March 23, 2007 8:29 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
An Incontrovertable Bore
42. Posted by Baron Von Ottomatic | March 23, 2007 8:29 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 08:29
43. Posted by Stephen Macklin | March 23, 2007 8:29 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
I think I just carbon offset in my pants.
43. Posted by Stephen Macklin | March 23, 2007 8:29 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 08:29
44. Posted by fustian | March 23, 2007 8:30 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
We've just learned that Tipper has inoperable cancer, so I've decided to run.
44. Posted by fustian | March 23, 2007 8:30 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 08:30
45. Posted by Jeff Blogworthy | March 23, 2007 8:31 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Yes, anyone refusing the 666 shall be beheaded. Their heads will be placed in these boxes.
45. Posted by Jeff Blogworthy | March 23, 2007 8:31 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 08:31
46. Posted by Jumpinjoe | March 23, 2007 8:32 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"See, another piece of the sky just fell on the man on the right side of the room."
46. Posted by Jumpinjoe | March 23, 2007 8:32 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 08:32
47. Posted by Baron Von Ottomatic | March 23, 2007 8:34 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
How can have I exceeded the Gross Vehicle Weight Rating for any chair in Washington?
47. Posted by Baron Von Ottomatic | March 23, 2007 8:34 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 08:34
48. Posted by Jeff Blogworthy | March 23, 2007 8:35 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Enzyte announces its replacement for Smiling Bob.
48. Posted by Jeff Blogworthy | March 23, 2007 8:35 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 08:35
49. Posted by taz | March 23, 2007 8:38 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Jackass in the Box.
49. Posted by taz | March 23, 2007 8:38 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 08:38
50. Posted by Jeff Blogworthy | March 23, 2007 8:42 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Thought bubble: I can hardly believe it - I've actually got people begging for their own enslavement.
50. Posted by Jeff Blogworthy | March 23, 2007 8:42 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 08:42
51. Posted by Beth | March 23, 2007 8:49 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
That "Lock Box?" It's environmentally friendly, too.
51. Posted by Beth | March 23, 2007 8:49 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 08:49
52. Posted by Dave | March 23, 2007 8:53 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
The vote in Florida clearly showed that everyone is for my global warming solutions.
52. Posted by Dave | March 23, 2007 8:53 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 08:53
53. Posted by Dave | March 23, 2007 8:55 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
I have bought carbon offsets because of the hot air produced during my global warming whining.
53. Posted by Dave | March 23, 2007 8:55 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 08:55
54. Posted by fred lawson | March 23, 2007 9:01 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Al Gore Admits Addiction To Box Lunches
54. Posted by fred lawson | March 23, 2007 9:01 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 09:01
55. Posted by Rodney Dill | March 23, 2007 9:12 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
I think I just carbon offset in my pants.
Excellent!
55. Posted by Rodney Dill | March 23, 2007 9:12 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 09:12
56. Posted by Falze | March 23, 2007 9:16 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"Hey, Inhofe! You were disgusted by "The Kiss" I planted on Tipper on stage? Watch THIS!"
56. Posted by Falze | March 23, 2007 9:16 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 09:16
57. Posted by mustng66 | March 23, 2007 9:18 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Carbon offsets? Why yes, we have carbon offsets right here. For today only they are 5 for a dollar. Get 'em while they're hot!
57. Posted by mustng66 | March 23, 2007 9:18 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 09:18
58. Posted by DaveD | March 23, 2007 9:22 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"Nah, I just keep them around for old time's sake. Every once in a while I just get them out to recount them."
58. Posted by DaveD | March 23, 2007 9:22 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 09:22
59. Posted by Bo | March 23, 2007 9:28 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Al Gore caught in an awkward moment after being advised that the contents of all these papers could have been stored on a single optical disc.
59. Posted by Bo | March 23, 2007 9:28 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 09:28
60. Posted by Bo | March 23, 2007 9:30 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
We're certain that each of these people, over 500,000 strong, intended to sign the petition!
60. Posted by Bo | March 23, 2007 9:30 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 09:30
61. Posted by Stormin | March 23, 2007 9:31 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Mr Roboto shows how not to reduce CO2 emmissions after arriving in his SUV, straight from the airport where his private jet dropped him off, carrying the waste of 40 trees on a useless petition.
61. Posted by Stormin | March 23, 2007 9:31 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 09:31
62. Posted by Bo | March 23, 2007 9:32 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Here we see 500,000 pieces of evidence that prove beyond any doubt, the reality of global dumbing.
62. Posted by Bo | March 23, 2007 9:32 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 09:32
63. Posted by pretzel_logic | March 23, 2007 9:38 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Dinner? Did someone say dinner?
63. Posted by pretzel_logic | March 23, 2007 9:38 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 09:38
64. Posted by pretzel_logic | March 23, 2007 9:40 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Allllbert my medications wearing off...Aaaaallllbert....
64. Posted by pretzel_logic | March 23, 2007 9:40 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 09:40
65. Posted by Gayle Miller | March 23, 2007 9:42 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
The most boring man in the world accompanied by his vapid blonde wife attempts once again to certify unreality!
65. Posted by Gayle Miller | March 23, 2007 9:42 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 09:42
66. Posted by civil behavior | March 23, 2007 9:47 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
So you think this is all a joke huh?
When you and your kids start suffering from your lack of intelligence on the subject then everything said here today will suddenly become your idea right?
What was that Mr. Inhofe......you said that none of this matters compared to your Holy Grail of greed and arrogance?
Tipper, these people are
66. Posted by civil behavior | March 23, 2007 9:47 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 09:47
67. Posted by Pete_Bondurant | March 23, 2007 9:50 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"Do you guys want to see me kiss Tipper again?"
67. Posted by Pete_Bondurant | March 23, 2007 9:50 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 09:50
68. Posted by Roger Fraley | March 23, 2007 9:53 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
All Gore practices looking smug, arrogant and clueless all at the same time.
68. Posted by Roger Fraley | March 23, 2007 9:53 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 09:53
69. Posted by Sharon | March 23, 2007 10:02 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Why Thank You. I believe I have lost weight.
69. Posted by Sharon | March 23, 2007 10:02 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 10:02
70. Posted by mantis | March 23, 2007 10:04 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Now these boxes are full of ballots with what we call "warming chads."
70. Posted by mantis | March 23, 2007 10:04 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 10:04
71. Posted by Jeff | March 23, 2007 10:07 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Former Vice President Al Gore prepares to testify before a Senate Hearing on the need to form a special Task Force to hunt down and kill ManBearPig.
71. Posted by Jeff | March 23, 2007 10:07 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 10:07
72. Posted by SILVER BULLET | March 23, 2007 10:09 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
It's true. Some people can light up a room. Turn the light off and save some energy!
72. Posted by SILVER BULLET | March 23, 2007 10:09 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 10:09
73. Posted by Pete | March 23, 2007 10:17 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
And now...Al-dini and the amazing lock box. Which one is it? Ooooooo...
73. Posted by Pete | March 23, 2007 10:17 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 10:17
74. Posted by trappedinmn | March 23, 2007 10:23 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"Lunch is served - all my favorites"
74. Posted by trappedinmn | March 23, 2007 10:23 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 10:23
75. Posted by Jim | March 23, 2007 10:23 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
While preparing for his testimony former VP Al Gore asks "Do you guys mind if I leave my lunch boxes here?"
75. Posted by Jim | March 23, 2007 10:23 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 10:23
76. Posted by fustian | March 23, 2007 10:26 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Al's been buying calorie offsets too. Others starve so that Al can continue to eat the food of ten families.
They don't work either.
76. Posted by fustian | March 23, 2007 10:26 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 10:26
77. Posted by wavemaker | March 23, 2007 10:39 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Farenheit 451 Redux?
77. Posted by wavemaker | March 23, 2007 10:39 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 10:39
78. Posted by Faith+1 | March 23, 2007 10:47 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Al Gore asks for more carbon offsets to counter the amount of hot air he spews on a daily basis.
78. Posted by Faith+1 | March 23, 2007 10:47 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 10:47
79. Posted by Faith+1 | March 23, 2007 10:49 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"Will demigogue for carbon offsets."
79. Posted by Faith+1 | March 23, 2007 10:49 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 10:49
80. Posted by Faith+1 | March 23, 2007 10:50 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"Tipper, crank up the thermostat we got 3 more boxes of offsets."
80. Posted by Faith+1 | March 23, 2007 10:50 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 10:50
81. Posted by Falze | March 23, 2007 10:51 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"Hmmm? Yeah, I made most of it up. The mic's aren't on, yet, right?"
81. Posted by Falze | March 23, 2007 10:51 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 10:51
82. Posted by Hodink | March 23, 2007 10:51 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"I have reinvented myself as Prophet Al and Tipper is Stevie Nicks without a warning label."
82. Posted by Hodink | March 23, 2007 10:51 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 10:51
83. Posted by 914 | March 23, 2007 10:54 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
BEEP....BEEP BEEP..We come in peace!
83. Posted by 914 | March 23, 2007 10:54 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 10:54
84. Posted by Falze | March 23, 2007 10:55 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Tipper: "Al, I don't think they want to "'scuse you" while you whip anything out!"
84. Posted by Falze | March 23, 2007 10:55 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 10:55
85. Posted by kim | March 23, 2007 11:04 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
You think she's the one with dark roots.
==========================
85. Posted by kim | March 23, 2007 11:04 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 11:04
86. Posted by 914 | March 23, 2007 11:05 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Yes Ladies and Gentlemen.. that gas smell is My carbon friendly lunch emissions of 2 whoppers 3 bags of fries and some caviar!
86. Posted by 914 | March 23, 2007 11:05 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 11:05
87. Posted by 914 | March 23, 2007 11:08 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Its true I tell You! Me and Tip biked all the way from Sri Lanka to be here!
Wheres Your sacrifices?
87. Posted by 914 | March 23, 2007 11:08 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 11:08
88. Posted by 914 | March 23, 2007 11:10 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Carbon misfits like us!
88. Posted by 914 | March 23, 2007 11:10 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 11:10
89. Posted by Falze | March 23, 2007 11:12 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
CNN Anchor voiceover: "We understand that it is graphic and disturbing. Unnecessary? We believe it is news and choose not to shield our viewers from the serious realities of the global warming 'debate', for which there is overwhelming scientific consensus and no opposition by any scientist that anyone would ever take seriously except BIG OIL companies who pay them off to lie about the reality of man-made global warming. CNN would like to point out that the preceding video was submitted to us by a Gore associate and we made that clear from the start. We would also point out that after Mr. Gore politely told the Committee that he would show them what his response to 'global warming deniers looks like', the video was faded to black after the frame shown here and before the ex-Vice President 'mooned' Mr. Inhofe at the hearing."
-
Too long for a caption? How about...
Footage of the ex-Vice President was thankfully faded to black before the actual 'mooning' of Mr. Inhofe.
89. Posted by Falze | March 23, 2007 11:12 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 11:12
90. Posted by jennifer | March 23, 2007 11:20 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Let's see plastic, paper, and glass for you average folk. And for you wealthy, lucky ones, register your name under one of these boxes to exchange your carbon footprints, through the effort of the paupers.
90. Posted by jennifer | March 23, 2007 11:20 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 11:20
91. Posted by 914 | March 23, 2007 11:33 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
So I try My best illegal move..a fake warming scan set to fill My account again!
Go on and set Me up for an Oscar award..post My face on the money You earn!
Take My liscense..all that jive..I cant fly 555!
91. Posted by 914 | March 23, 2007 11:33 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 11:33
92. Posted by ted | March 23, 2007 11:34 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
And in these boxes, you will find plaster casts of all my carbon footprints.
92. Posted by ted | March 23, 2007 11:34 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 11:34
93. Posted by DSkinner | March 23, 2007 11:39 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
What, you wanted these 48 hours in advance? Don't you realize I'm the Algoracle?
93. Posted by DSkinner | March 23, 2007 11:39 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 11:39
94. Posted by kbiel | March 23, 2007 11:39 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"These are the signatures of my supporters pledging to stop emitting any carbon dioxide. Strangely, many of them have suddenly died from asphyxiation."
94. Posted by kbiel | March 23, 2007 11:39 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 11:39
95. Posted by 914 | March 23, 2007 11:54 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Lunatic fringe....Me and Tipper know Your out there!
95. Posted by 914 | March 23, 2007 11:54 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 11:54
96. Posted by 914 | March 23, 2007 12:11 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Apparently smuggliness is next to gluttonliness?
Is there such a word?
There is now!
96. Posted by 914 | March 23, 2007 12:11 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 12:11
97. Posted by Clay | March 23, 2007 12:21 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Mr. Gore was quite shocked to discover that the 997,372 trees that were used to produce his documentation would have eliminated 14 million pounds of CO2 last year. "Well, I guess I just didn't do the math. But, hey, somebody's gotta sacrifice.", Mr. Gore remarked.
97. Posted by Clay | March 23, 2007 12:21 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 12:21
98. Posted by 914 | March 23, 2007 12:25 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Wha? the brown box? ohh thats just the lost and found box and contains the white water files and missing military ballots from 2000' no biggie!
98. Posted by 914 | March 23, 2007 12:25 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 12:25
99. Posted by Peter F. | March 23, 2007 12:30 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"You cut a hole in a box...Put your junk in that box...Make her open that box....ohh it's my dick in box!"
99. Posted by Peter F. | March 23, 2007 12:30 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 12:30
100. Posted by 914 | March 23, 2007 12:33 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
That clock on the wall does not say 5:oopm I do not own 4 mansions and I never took a dime from the Bhuddist monks!
Any more questions?
100. Posted by 914 | March 23, 2007 12:33 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 12:33
101. Posted by Master Shake | March 23, 2007 12:37 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
No, I tossed the petitions out the window of the Hummer limo I came here in. This is just part of my mid-morning snack - the rest of the boxes are in the hall.
101. Posted by Master Shake | March 23, 2007 12:37 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 12:37
102. Posted by _Mike_ | March 23, 2007 12:49 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
----
"Don't be too proud of this technological terror you've constructed. The ability to destroy a planet is insignificant next to the power of the Farce."
----
"I find your lack of faith disturbing, Representative Barton."
-----
Darth Gore
102. Posted by _Mike_ | March 23, 2007 12:49 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 12:49
103. Posted by 914 | March 23, 2007 1:06 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Al the magic con Man lived carbon free
And frolicked in the learjet mist in a place called ole D.C.
Al the magic con Man lived carbon free
And practiced what he preached by God as We can clearly see
103. Posted by 914 | March 23, 2007 1:06 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 13:06
104. Posted by Zelsdorf Ragshaft III | March 23, 2007 1:12 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Hello, my name is algore. Tipper and I are hear to buy calorie credits. I need 2000 per day.
104. Posted by Zelsdorf Ragshaft III | March 23, 2007 1:12 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 13:12
105. Posted by John F Not Kerry | March 23, 2007 1:13 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"These things? I like to call them 'sanity lockboxes'".
105. Posted by John F Not Kerry | March 23, 2007 1:13 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 13:13
106. Posted by Tango | March 23, 2007 1:24 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Boxes of loose chads (circa 2000) are presented as an alternative fuel at recent congressional hearings. "These little buggers caused me a whole lot of aggravation way back when, so firing 'em up not only produces heat but, on a personal level, gives me the 'warm and fuzzies,'" exclaimed Gore as he slipped his feet into some electrically warmed slippers.
106. Posted by Tango | March 23, 2007 1:24 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 13:24
107. Posted by _Mike_ | March 23, 2007 1:33 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Mr. Gore begins to remove his coat prior to demonstrating his climatology 'Al Gore Rhythm'
107. Posted by _Mike_ | March 23, 2007 1:33 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 13:33
108. Posted by Parker | March 23, 2007 1:43 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
We're not gaining weight - Tipper and I are personally sequestering carbon.
For the children!
108. Posted by Parker | March 23, 2007 1:43 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 13:43
109. Posted by Bungalowlife | March 23, 2007 1:45 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
The House hearing had to be delayed when, after about fifteen minutes, it was determined that the committee members were questioning the Al Gore wax dummy from Madame Tussaud's. Not even Tipper noticed the difference. The real Al was located taking his pre-dinner snack in the House cafeteria.
109. Posted by Bungalowlife | March 23, 2007 1:45 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 13:45
110. Posted by skymuse | March 23, 2007 1:48 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"No, really, dirty song lyrics are going to destroy the earth....we're TOTALLY serial!"
110. Posted by skymuse | March 23, 2007 1:48 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 13:48
111. Posted by Tom Blogical | March 23, 2007 1:52 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"Well, of course I would have some Grey Poupon, let me get it out of my pocket for you right now, my good sir."
111. Posted by Tom Blogical | March 23, 2007 1:52 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 13:52
112. Posted by Deathlok | March 23, 2007 1:52 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Huh? 5:00? Screw the recount. It's eatin' time!!
(Meanwhile, in support of Mr Gore, Killroy shows that he is, indeed, here!)
112. Posted by Deathlok | March 23, 2007 1:52 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 13:52
113. Posted by Tom Blogical | March 23, 2007 1:59 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"Sergeant Raymond Shaw, how's the Global Warming brainwa---, I mean project going?"
113. Posted by Tom Blogical | March 23, 2007 1:59 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 13:59
114. Posted by 914 | March 23, 2007 2:11 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Gore: My contribution to "Global warming" is as nothing compared to the size of My ego!
114. Posted by 914 | March 23, 2007 2:11 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 14:11
115. Posted by 914 | March 23, 2007 2:18 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Tipper: Honey I got the hummer warmed up! hurry up or were gonna be late for cocktails at Marthas vineyard!
Teddys wearing the lampshade tonight!
115. Posted by 914 | March 23, 2007 2:18 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 14:18
116. Posted by 914 | March 23, 2007 2:28 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
The Duke of methane has returned to impress us all with His massive amounts of pent up flatulence!!
116. Posted by 914 | March 23, 2007 2:28 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 14:28
117. Posted by tiismedavid | March 23, 2007 2:34 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
What do you mean all the signatures look like mine?
117. Posted by tiismedavid | March 23, 2007 2:34 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 14:34
118. Posted by David | March 23, 2007 2:40 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Why yes Mr Inhofe, I will be happy to show you the butt that these 500,000 people have kissed.
118. Posted by David | March 23, 2007 2:40 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 14:40
119. Posted by 914 | March 23, 2007 2:42 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
The rest of the ballots er....I mean petitions are in My trunk right next to the diebold.
119. Posted by 914 | March 23, 2007 2:42 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 14:42
120. Posted by David | March 23, 2007 2:50 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
You will notice, these signatures come from cemetaries all around the country, er, I mean predominately democratic voters.
120. Posted by David | March 23, 2007 2:50 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 14:50
121. Posted by JimK | March 23, 2007 3:02 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"Al, honey, please tell me these petitions don't involve the word 'butterfly'."
121. Posted by JimK | March 23, 2007 3:02 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 15:02
122. Posted by Mike | March 23, 2007 3:13 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Al, he said you were a global warm onger.
122. Posted by Mike | March 23, 2007 3:13 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 15:13
123. Posted by 914 | March 23, 2007 3:14 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Gore: Gentlemen I submit to You that Me and John Edwards have agreed in principal to reduce our carbon emisssions by 50% in the coming year, ushering in the next Ice Age and providing for a sequel to an "inconvenient truth" to be titled "A justifiable freeze."
123. Posted by 914 | March 23, 2007 3:14 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 15:14
124. Posted by Woody | March 23, 2007 3:16 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Listen up, pedestrians. This is the face of an Oscar winner. Kneel before the Goracle.
124. Posted by Woody | March 23, 2007 3:16 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 15:16
125. Posted by tiismedavid | March 23, 2007 4:18 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
yes, Michael Moore and I have many things in common - girth, an Osacar, the proclivity to just make sh** up and pass it off as "science"...
125. Posted by tiismedavid | March 23, 2007 4:18 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 16:18
126. Posted by jbwbubba | March 23, 2007 4:27 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"Why yes, before the internet, I invented the box"
126. Posted by jbwbubba | March 23, 2007 4:27 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 16:27
127. Posted by Shoulung | March 23, 2007 4:34 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Inhofe: 'How many toner cartridges did you use to copy these petitions?' You do know they are filled with carbon powder."
Gore: "Carbon powder? But it's called 'toner'! What do you mean those things are filled with carbon!?!"
127. Posted by Shoulung | March 23, 2007 4:34 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 16:34
128. Posted by stan25 | March 23, 2007 4:47 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Algore showing the Drive by Media, the proof that George W Bush had actually lost the 2000 election in Florida and he (algore) was the real winner.
128. Posted by stan25 | March 23, 2007 4:47 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 16:47
129. Posted by 914 | March 23, 2007 4:56 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
These petitions are all made out of recycled butterfly ballots from Dade county!
My suit however is made from pure tibetan silk! A gift from the good people of Mongolia!
Everything else u see and hear today is pure bunk!
129. Posted by 914 | March 23, 2007 4:56 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 16:56
130. Posted by Bullwinkle | March 23, 2007 4:59 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
\"In These boxes? Tipper and I brought enough tinfoil for everyone to wrap their heads so the mind rays won\'t keep you from learing the inconvenient truth about Global Warming\" -- \"I see you Democrats brought your own, good!\"
130. Posted by Bullwinkle | March 23, 2007 4:59 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 16:59
131. Posted by WILLIAM SHIVES | March 23, 2007 5:24 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"IN THESE BOXES ARE THE INDISPUTABLE EVIDENCE THAT GLOBAL WARMING IS UPON US." "TIPPER HONEY, SHOW THEM THE DICE THAT WERE HANGING ON THE MIRROR OF YOUR CAR." "THESE DICE ARE DISCOLORED AND DEFORMED DO THE EXTREME TEMPERATURES REACHED IN THE STRECH LIMO. A CLEAR INDICATION OF RISING TEMPURATURES. WE HAVE MANY MORE EXAMPLES."
131. Posted by WILLIAM SHIVES | March 23, 2007 5:24 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 17:24
132. Posted by c | March 23, 2007 6:24 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
As an Algore Independent Business Owner (IBO) you will earn commissions not only on your own sales of Algore Sanctimony Offsets, but also (and this is the great part) on the sales of each and every IBO you sponsor.
Does that sound like something you would be interested in?
132. Posted by c | March 23, 2007 6:24 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 18:24
133. Posted by JAT | March 23, 2007 6:30 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Imagine that! Madam Chairperson! Hum, if Bill were here he'd be beating the pants off Pelosi! OH MY what memories that brings back.
133. Posted by JAT | March 23, 2007 6:30 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 18:30
134. Posted by Jeff Blogworthy | March 23, 2007 6:41 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Since leaving Tennessee, Al Gore has completely mastered the pompous Northern "nose lookdown".
134. Posted by Jeff Blogworthy | March 23, 2007 6:41 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 18:41
135. Posted by Dodo David | March 23, 2007 6:54 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Al Gore reacts to the news that Congress will take real action now to stop global warming . . . by making him walk his talk.
Tipper responds, "Al, do something. They are going to take away our trips on private jets, our limo rides, our zinc mines, our energy hog that we call a house."
135. Posted by Dodo David | March 23, 2007 6:54 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 18:54
136. Posted by 914 | March 23, 2007 6:56 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Presumptive arrogance is a lethal concoction!
136. Posted by 914 | March 23, 2007 6:56 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 18:56
137. Posted by Giacomo | March 23, 2007 7:01 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"... and in these two boxes I've brought the 538 butterfly ballots from Palm Beach County where, finally, the right chad fell out. I, Al Gore, am your President."
137. Posted by Giacomo | March 23, 2007 7:01 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 19:01
138. Posted by AkBigBoy | March 23, 2007 7:10 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Carbon offsets in the brown box, Lunch in the white box - got it Mr. Gore.
138. Posted by AkBigBoy | March 23, 2007 7:10 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 19:10
139. Posted by Dodo David | March 23, 2007 7:14 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
AL Gore, addressing members of Congress:
"I have here a petition signed by 500,000 people demanding that Congress take real action now to stop global warming . . . or to make Kevin Aylward post the winners of the Wizbang!caption contests when he says he will post them . . . whichever is easier."
139. Posted by Dodo David | March 23, 2007 7:14 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 19:14
140. Posted by Spike | March 23, 2007 7:50 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Former Vice President Algore is entered as an exibit by Tipper Gore prior to her testimony before the House Sub-committee on Mental Health about her idea of "I.Q. offsets". "The intellectual achievements of human beings would have no limits and can be easily offset until 2050 by my husband's sheer idiocy", she said.
140. Posted by Spike | March 23, 2007 7:50 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 19:50
141. Posted by radiCalMan | March 23, 2007 8:10 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"Hey Tipper! Look at all these carbon credits I found here in my ol' Senate Social Security Lock Boxes!"
141. Posted by radiCalMan | March 23, 2007 8:10 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 20:10
142. Posted by Spike | March 23, 2007 8:38 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Divinity School dropout Algore attempts to reverse one of his five "F"s from Vanderbilt by testifiying before the House Energy and Commerce, and Science and Technology committees about his growing cult. "The IPCC Version says in Tomfoolery 3:16, 'If ye believe not in me, ye shall all be baptized by fire. Ye must be purged from your sins with the precious carbon offsets given by the only begotten Son of GOREd, who from the beginning of Occidental Petroleum came to save the people from their freedoms.'"
142. Posted by Spike | March 23, 2007 8:38 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 20:38
143. Posted by Rodney Dill | March 23, 2007 8:43 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Inconvenient Truth #134
Al Gore is so tight, if you put carbon up his butt, two weeks later you have diamonds. This is known as carbon offsetting.
143. Posted by Rodney Dill | March 23, 2007 8:43 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 20:43
144. Posted by Robert Realtor | March 23, 2007 8:50 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Al Gore unveils the new ultra-high tech Florida voting system
144. Posted by Robert Realtor | March 23, 2007 8:50 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 20:50
145. Posted by Tom Blogical | March 23, 2007 9:36 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"Which way did my little bunny rabbit go? When I find him, I will name him George, and I will hug him and pet him and love him and squeeze him."
145. Posted by Tom Blogical | March 23, 2007 9:36 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 21:36
146. Posted by Tom Blogical | March 23, 2007 9:39 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"Which way did my little bunny rabbit go? Gosh it's hot! When I find him, I will name him George, and I will hug him and pet him and love him and squeeze him."
146. Posted by Tom Blogical | March 23, 2007 9:39 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 21:39
147. Posted by Tom Blogical | March 23, 2007 11:14 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Al-e-Gore-y of Climatology.
147. Posted by Tom Blogical | March 23, 2007 11:14 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 23, 2007 23:14
148. Posted by SCSIwuzzy | March 24, 2007 12:26 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
No, these aren't from the trees that I planted for carbon off-sets. They came the clear cutting of the forest that needed to be removed so that I could strip mine for zinc.
148. Posted by SCSIwuzzy | March 24, 2007 12:26 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 24, 2007 00:26
149. Posted by Jeff Blogworthy | March 24, 2007 1:31 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Left-wing logic:
Theocracy - bad, very bad
Pantheocracy - good, very good
149. Posted by Jeff Blogworthy | March 24, 2007 1:31 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 24, 2007 01:31
150. Posted by KB | March 24, 2007 4:14 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"The planet has a fever! And the only prescription is more cowbell!"
150. Posted by KB | March 24, 2007 4:14 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 24, 2007 04:14
151. Posted by Giacomo | March 24, 2007 7:44 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"My name is Beld- ... err, Algore. We're ... from France. Prymaat ... Tipper and I will now consume mass quantities."
151. Posted by Giacomo | March 24, 2007 7:44 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 24, 2007 07:44
152. Posted by Rodney Dill | March 24, 2007 9:51 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"I intend to run, just as soon as I discover the secret of turning Wizbang Captions into votes, I always get more than anyone else."
152. Posted by Rodney Dill | March 24, 2007 9:51 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 24, 2007 09:51
153. Posted by retired military | March 24, 2007 10:01 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"Why yes I am the smartest man in the universe and I brought this dumb blonde along with me to prove it."
----------------------------
"That's right senator, Global warming, caused the voting machines in Florida to not work properly. Since we know that republicans created global warming, and like the earth global warming is a sentinent being, it was directly responsible for me losing the 2000 election.
-----------------------
Tipper - "When he stands like that it makes me just want to run up to him and kiss him like we did at the democratic convention"
-------------------------------
Al Gore poses for his statue entitled "The most inflated ego in history"
-----------------------
Al - "... and not only that but global warming is directly responsible for not only me but Rosie Odonnel being overweight."
-------------------------------
"And Mister Chairman I categorically deny the accusation from the republican senator that Rosie ODonnel and myself are responsible for the increasing amount of Hot Air coming out of Hollywood.
153. Posted by retired military | March 24, 2007 10:01 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 24, 2007 10:01
154. Posted by Rodney Dill | March 24, 2007 10:42 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Finding upon inspection that none of Al Gore's boxes were indeed locked, the AARP chose to endorse Obama.
154. Posted by Rodney Dill | March 24, 2007 10:42 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 24, 2007 10:42
155. Posted by Rodney Dill | March 24, 2007 10:44 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"Yes, I did have documentation proving Global Warming, but Sandy Burger 'borrowed' it."
155. Posted by Rodney Dill | March 24, 2007 10:44 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 24, 2007 10:44
156. Posted by Rodney Dill | March 24, 2007 10:45 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Prior to Al Gore's appearance a Globular Warning was issued.
156. Posted by Rodney Dill | March 24, 2007 10:45 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 24, 2007 10:45
157. Posted by Anachronda | March 24, 2007 11:48 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
No, no, I meant cardboard neutral.
157. Posted by Anachronda | March 24, 2007 11:48 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 24, 2007 11:48
158. Posted by 914 | March 24, 2007 2:59 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Honey?? I've shrunk the bids!
158. Posted by 914 | March 24, 2007 2:59 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 24, 2007 14:59
159. Posted by 914 | March 24, 2007 3:07 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
A smirk that only a Mother could love!
159. Posted by 914 | March 24, 2007 3:07 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 24, 2007 15:07
160. Posted by 914 | March 24, 2007 3:09 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
If I were any more gay, the lights would all go out in Massachussettes!
160. Posted by 914 | March 24, 2007 3:09 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 24, 2007 15:09
161. Posted by Harvey | March 24, 2007 3:23 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
An awkward expression came over Mr. Gore's face as he realized he had mistakenly shipped his electric bill instead of the petitions.
161. Posted by Harvey | March 24, 2007 3:23 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 24, 2007 15:23
162. Posted by 914 | March 24, 2007 4:09 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Face it, Gore...The only inconvenient truth is that you can't get it up.
162. Posted by 914 | March 24, 2007 4:09 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 24, 2007 16:09
163. Posted by 914 | March 24, 2007 4:21 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
An Al leGory of stupidity!
163. Posted by 914 | March 24, 2007 4:21 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 24, 2007 16:21
164. Posted by Tom Blogical | March 24, 2007 5:45 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"Well, of course I'm smarter than you. Pissant."
164. Posted by Tom Blogical | March 24, 2007 5:45 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 24, 2007 17:45
165. Posted by fustian | March 24, 2007 5:58 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Yes, my asscheeks smell like pomegranites. Why do you ask?
165. Posted by fustian | March 24, 2007 5:58 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 24, 2007 17:58
166. Posted by retired military | March 24, 2007 7:05 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"No Senator, I have scientific proof that these pants do not make my ass look fat!"
166. Posted by retired military | March 24, 2007 7:05 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 24, 2007 19:05
167. Posted by retired military | March 24, 2007 7:06 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Al thinking to himself "Please please please not now. Please no."
TIpper thinking to herself "OH NO He has that face he has every time he has gas at an important event"
167. Posted by retired military | March 24, 2007 7:06 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 24, 2007 19:06
168. Posted by Serenity | March 24, 2007 8:35 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
See? I'm a funny guy after all! I just convinced 500,000 tree huggers to fight Mother Nature.
168. Posted by Serenity | March 24, 2007 8:35 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 24, 2007 20:35
169. Posted by Tom Blogical | March 24, 2007 8:47 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Gore turns and looks after someone asks, "Is there a jackass in the house?"
169. Posted by Tom Blogical | March 24, 2007 8:47 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 24, 2007 20:47
170. Posted by crazylibs | March 24, 2007 9:36 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
The real president of the united states
170. Posted by crazylibs | March 24, 2007 9:36 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 24, 2007 21:36
171. Posted by fustian | March 25, 2007 1:41 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Sen. Inhofe, I sniff my own farts in a personal attempt to process the damn carbon.
171. Posted by fustian | March 25, 2007 1:41 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 25, 2007 01:41
172. Posted by 914 | March 25, 2007 3:03 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Ladies and Gentlemen of the court!
I suggest to you? that if My fingers were not so far up My rectum right now! I would not look so gesticularily happy!
172. Posted by 914 | March 25, 2007 3:03 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 25, 2007 03:03
173. Posted by 914 | March 25, 2007 3:09 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
I did not have sex with that Woman?
These allegations are false!
Now Im gonna load My shorts with mulch! dam u all!
173. Posted by 914 | March 25, 2007 3:09 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 25, 2007 03:09
174. Posted by 914 | March 25, 2007 3:32 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Tipper: Honey? those wetbacks are here again! something about yardwork?
Chubby; Dont worry honey! We can keep them all at Ws place!
oh? ok snookums!
174. Posted by 914 | March 25, 2007 3:32 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 25, 2007 03:32
175. Posted by 914 | March 25, 2007 1:29 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Inhofe: Lay off the viagra stiffy!
175. Posted by 914 | March 25, 2007 1:29 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 25, 2007 13:29
176. Posted by Tom Blogical | March 25, 2007 1:56 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"As God is my witness, I swear I thought that the Carbon Offsets thing would fly."
176. Posted by Tom Blogical | March 25, 2007 1:56 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 25, 2007 13:56
177. Posted by Rodney Dill | March 25, 2007 2:58 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"Today I'm handin' out lollipops and Carbon Offsets, and I'm fresh out of lollipops."
177. Posted by Rodney Dill | March 25, 2007 2:58 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 25, 2007 14:58
178. Posted by fustian | March 25, 2007 11:19 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Before I invented the internet, I invented boxes.
178. Posted by fustian | March 25, 2007 11:19 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 25, 2007 23:19
179. Posted by Kevin | March 26, 2007 2:13 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Update: Winners announced. Click the link to read the winning entries. The contest is now closed.
179. Posted by Kevin | March 26, 2007 2:13 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on March 26, 2007 02:13