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Wizbang Weekend Caption Contest™

It's Friday, which means it's time for the Wizbang Weekend Caption Contest™. Enter your best caption for the following picture:

Spanish bullfighter Fernando Cruz while fighting a bull during San Isidro's bullfighting fair at Madrid's Las Ventas bullring, May 13, 2006. Cruz is recovering in hospital after the second bull of Tuesday's corrida caught him in the upper thigh, throwing him into the air, and gored him in the groin once he hit the ground. (Susana Vera/Reuters)


Winners will be announced Sunday.


Update: Winners announced. Click on the link to read the winning entries. The constest is now closed.


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» The Bullwinkle Blog linked with Hokey Smokes! Caption Contest: Week 43

Comments (139)

"MORE COWBELL!!!"... (Below threshold)

"MORE COWBELL!!!"

I dare you ... come on give... (Below threshold)
TK:

I dare you ... come on give me your best shot.

The announcer at the 2008 P... (Below threshold)
retired military:

The announcer at the 2008 Presidential Debates "and on my left we have Hillary Clinton"


-------------------------------------------

Helen Thomas demands her front row seat at the White House Press conference.

-----------------------------


And our guest of honor toda... (Below threshold)
retired military:

And our guest of honor today - Rosie ODonnell

"Music hath charms...", my ... (Below threshold)
No One of Consequence:

"Music hath charms...", my ass.

That's not what I meant whe... (Below threshold)
Anthony:

That's not what I meant when I said "Cut and run"

My sword what happened to m... (Below threshold)
retired military:

My sword what happened to my sword? Damn those PETA folks.

When Obama decided he neede... (Below threshold)

When Obama decided he needed a political consultant to address Hillary's campaign presence, he sought out the best, with considerable infighting experience.

Were you gored in the groin... (Below threshold)
Mr Obvious:

Were you gored in the groin or are you just happy to see me?

Spanish bullfighter retires... (Below threshold)
Jeff Blogworthy:

Spanish bullfighter retires unexpectedly to become one of the Three Tenors.

Speaking of the New Castrat... (Below threshold)
Jeff Blogworthy:

Speaking of the New Castrati...

"Hey! I dare you to knock t... (Below threshold)
Jeff Blogworthy:

"Hey! I dare you to knock this off."

Sometimes you get the bull,... (Below threshold)

Sometimes you get the bull, sometimes you get the horn.

(too obvious?)

I'm so pretty! Oh so pretty... (Below threshold)
Jeff Blogworthy:

I'm so pretty! Oh so pretty! I'm so pretty and witty and gay!...

Former Attorney General Alb... (Below threshold)
pretzel_logic:

Former Attorney General Alberto Gonzales announces his new position...

I thought you said said "go... (Below threshold)
lisa:

I thought you said said "gore the bull--not Gore IS bull...

Sheesh. I knew I should hav... (Below threshold)
Jeff Blogworthy:

Sheesh. I knew I should have tried appeasement!

Hold it in! We mu... (Below threshold)

Hold it in! We must stop Global Warming!

I think it all started when... (Below threshold)
Jeff Blogworthy:

I think it all started when I called him a 'stupid American gringo bull.'

Bill Richardson's recent ph... (Below threshold)
pretzel_logic:

Bill Richardson's recent photo op in Warez Mexico went terribly bad...

I don't know why they stopp... (Below threshold)
Jeff Blogworthy:

I don't know why they stopped the bullfight... I was about to win by beating him into submission with my testicles.

Fuggitaboutit!... (Below threshold)
Baron Von Ottomatic:

Fuggitaboutit!

Bullfights finally reached ... (Below threshold)
Baron Von Ottomatic:

Bullfights finally reached a Tarantino-esque level of bloodshed once scientists genetically engineered cows with acid for blood.

Now run away or I shall tau... (Below threshold)
JohnMc:

Now run away or I shall taunt you a second time!

"Heeeerrrre bully bully bul... (Below threshold)
Faith+1:

"Heeeerrrre bully bully bully....."

But... but... we just elect... (Below threshold)
Jeff Blogworthy:

But... but... we just elected a pro bull-Qaeda faction!

Juan was shocked to discove... (Below threshold)
Baron Von Ottomatic:

Juan was shocked to discover the bull reacted much differently to the back of his hand than his mujer.

Charles was too strongly in... (Below threshold)
Baron Von Ottomatic:

Charles was too strongly influenced by Bugs Bunny cartoons - insufferable sass mouth, frequent cross dressing, long-running fueds with waterfowl, and the occassional bullfight.

What do you mean "your girl... (Below threshold)
Baron Von Ottomatic:

What do you mean "your girlfriend"?!? She came on to me in the barn!!

Your horns and testosterone... (Below threshold)
Baron Von Ottomatic:

Your horns and testosterone are no match for my dainty pantsuit and cock-sure strut!

Say hello to my little frie... (Below threshold)
Baron Von Ottomatic:

Say hello to my little friend!

BVO:"Say hello to ... (Below threshold)
Jeff Blogworthy:

BVO:

"Say hello to my little friend!"

LOL!

Unfortunately for Ernie, th... (Below threshold)

Unfortunately for Ernie, this was one of those Canadian mad cows he'd heard about.

Fernando was lucky he stuff... (Below threshold)
Tango:

Fernando was lucky he stuffed an extra tube sock in his spandex that morning. "I like-a-to give-a the senioritas in da front-a-row a little som-a-ting extra. I never-a thought-a it would save a-da family-a jewels-a."

Like the science of global ... (Below threshold)

Like the science of global warming, this guy's about to be Gored.

Alejandro had mistakenly en... (Below threshold)

Alejandro had mistakenly entered a NOW budget meeting.

Alberto Gonzalez meets an i... (Below threshold)

Alberto Gonzalez meets an imnpartial national press.

"Its Tuesday Mitch and I'm ... (Below threshold)
Robert the original:

"Its Tuesday Mitch and I'm back. Its me Morrie, can you believe I came back as a bull? Of all the damn luck."

Zapatero announces that, si... (Below threshold)

Zapatero announces that, since Spain unilaterally disarmed, al Qaeda can simply go away now!

Boy that's sharp. I bet it... (Below threshold)
P. Bunyan:

Boy that's sharp. I bet it'd hurt like hell to get hit in the AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! Shit!

I am a liberal. I will neg... (Below threshold)

I am a liberal. I will negotiate with this bull! OUCH!

Libby is just beginning to ... (Below threshold)

Libby is just beginning to suspect that his jury isn't strictly impartial.

I call this animal "Global ... (Below threshold)

I call this animal "Global Warming" because he's full of bullcrap and he tries to gore me to death.

Bull..... SHIIIIIIIIIIIIIIT... (Below threshold)
marc:

Bull..... SHIIIIIIIIIIIIIITTTT!

"Hey Toro! You no lika metr... (Below threshold)
sammy small:

"Hey Toro! You no lika metrosexual?"

"Oh great, just great. I ge... (Below threshold)
Peter F.:

"Oh great, just great. I get new shoes and what happens? I step in bullshit..."

President Bush at a news co... (Below threshold)
John in CA:

President Bush at a news conference yesterday: "Spain is a focal point in the war on beef. If we don't fight the bulls there, we'll have to fight them over here."

"I am Captain Tightpants, a... (Below threshold)
MunDane:

"I am Captain Tightpants, and I see you are a little horny.."

"like you ...? " "... (Below threshold)

"like you ...? "

"like you ...? "

" Nooooo...thats is a banana in my pocket "

I put 3 arrows in rosie and... (Below threshold)
moseby:

I put 3 arrows in rosie and she still didn't go down...you better hope Sonny makes that deal!!

"so does these pants, make ... (Below threshold)
jbwbubba:

"so does these pants, make my butt look fat?"

During the Cha-Cha segment ... (Below threshold)
jaymaster:

During the Cha-Cha segment of "Dancing With The Stars: Wacko Celebrities Edition", her partner recoils in horror as Rosie O'Donnell's skirt ends up in his hand....

LET THE EEEEEEEAAAAAAAAGLE ... (Below threshold)
Pat:

LET THE EEEEEEEAAAAAAAAGLE SOOOAAAAR!!!

Manuel "The Wad" Rodriguez ... (Below threshold)
Bungalowlife:

Manuel "The Wad" Rodriguez is shown moments before his untimely demise when he fatally and mistakenly flourishes the hand without the red cape.

"I could have had a V8!"</p... (Below threshold)
Master Shake:

"I could have had a V8!"

"Oh, so THAT'S a bull! I'm... (Below threshold)
Master Shake:

"Oh, so THAT'S a bull! I'm so screwed...."

For some reason, the bull d... (Below threshold)
Master Shake:

For some reason, the bull did not react favorably to Diego "bitch slapping" him.

"If you gore me, everyone w... (Below threshold)
Master Shake:

"If you gore me, everyone will think you're a homophobe!"

"Of course you know this me... (Below threshold)

"Of course you know this means WAR!"

Alberto Gonzalez faces his ... (Below threshold)

Alberto Gonzalez faces his critics.

Sanjaya's performance of <i... (Below threshold)

Sanjaya's performance of Wooly Bully ensured that he'd be around for another week.

Kevin Aylward faces his cri... (Below threshold)

Kevin Aylward faces his critics after belatedly posting the winners of the Caption Contest again.

"Who's your DADDY?!"... (Below threshold)

"Who's your DADDY?!"

"So whaddya think? Can I m... (Below threshold)

"So whaddya think? Can I make it on Dancing with the Stars?"

Al Gored.... (Below threshold)
Peter F.:

Al Gored.

"Your mama wears cowboy boo... (Below threshold)

"Your mama wears cowboy boots!"

"There's only two kinds of ... (Below threshold)

"There's only two kinds of bulls that come from Texas..."

"Viva la cameltoe!"... (Below threshold)
Peter F.:

"Viva la cameltoe!"

"It's OK!! I'm Catholic, a... (Below threshold)

"It's OK!! I'm Catholic, and we don't eat meat on Fridays during Lent!!"

I will suggest there may be... (Below threshold)
Baron Von Ottomatic:

I will suggest there may be better things in life than seeing a man get hit in the groin with a football...

Carlos bravely volunteered ... (Below threshold)

Carlos bravely volunteered to test the strength of the new butt implants.

Hello. My name is Inigo Mon... (Below threshold)

Hello. My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father prepare to die.

Auditions for the next seas... (Below threshold)

Auditions for the next season of Mexican Idol began today.

Hey! I'm walkin' here!... (Below threshold)

Hey! I'm walkin' here!

It's one of the new PETA bu... (Below threshold)

It's one of the new PETA bullfights, and guess who wins...

"Para bailar la bamba!!"</p... (Below threshold)

"Para bailar la bamba!!"

You like? It was on sale t... (Below threshold)
Fancysuit:

You like? It was on sale this week only at Ross!

" You'll get Your bib back ... (Below threshold)
914:

" You'll get Your bib back at feeding time Rosie!"

Hark! It's Al's G... (Below threshold)
Dale A:

Hark!

It's Al's Gore and the Global Warming Bull !!

In liberal bullfighting, th... (Below threshold)

In liberal bullfighting, the matador attempts to talk the bull out of it.

"THAT is the LAST time I tr... (Below threshold)
Senor Pastyface:

"THAT is the LAST time I try to pass myself off as 'Speedy Gonzales'!"

In an attempt to have the s... (Below threshold)
Heralder:

In an attempt to have the sport taken more seriously, rodeo clowns are now required to dress in 'formal clown-wear'

Kevin Nealon's "Subliminal ... (Below threshold)
Faith+1:

Kevin Nealon's "Subliminal Guy" act wasn't working on the bull.

Is that Your horn or are Yo... (Below threshold)
914:

Is that Your horn or are You happy to see Me?

What's black and white and ... (Below threshold)
914:

What's black and white and full of fright??

Not tonight steer..I have a... (Below threshold)
914:

Not tonight steer..I have a headache!

What's black and white and ... (Below threshold)

What's black and white and soon to be red all over.

"Once again, you shall addr... (Below threshold)

"Once again, you shall address me as El Conquistador."

BANDAGES?.......We don't ne... (Below threshold)

BANDAGES?.......We don't need no STINKING BANDAGES!

Bull: Im gonna Gore U right... (Below threshold)
914:

Bull: Im gonna Gore U right where U carbon offset!

"I am a warrior! I am brave... (Below threshold)
Peter F.:

"I am a warrior! I am brave! I am strong! I have had too much tequila!"

"I fart in your general dir... (Below threshold)
Gmac:

"I fart in your general direction"

You call that a horn? I'll ... (Below threshold)
Locomotive Breath:

You call that a horn? I'll show you a horn!

Man to Bull: "Hey! I may dr... (Below threshold)
Dodo David:

Man to Bull: "Hey! I may dress like a pansie, but that's no excuse for you getting all horny with me."

No, that is not a buritto i... (Below threshold)
SCSIwuzzy:

No, that is not a buritto in my pocket. I am happy to see you.

The latest volunteer for th... (Below threshold)
retired military:

The latest volunteer for the minuteman dares an illegal immigrant to cross the border.

"Bullsh*t", yelled the figh... (Below threshold)
Diane:

"Bullsh*t", yelled the fighter when he found out Pelosi & company set a withdrawal date for all bullfighters to come home from Spain.

Hey, I'm walking here, I'm ... (Below threshold)

Hey, I'm walking here, I'm walking here!

"Can you catch the wind and... (Below threshold)

"Can you catch the wind and put it in your pocket? Such is ze Mango!!"

Dennis Kucinich breaks into... (Below threshold)

Dennis Kucinich breaks into song, not realizing the bull he's been spouting is coming back around . . .

"Hey! If you'd gone to the ... (Below threshold)
LorenB:

"Hey! If you'd gone to the dry cleaners as I asked, I'd be wearing my cool Ralph Lauren Polo uniform!"

John Kerry attempting to im... (Below threshold)
retired military:

John Kerry attempting to improve on his tough guy image was overheard to say "Hey you guys must have put windex on this plexiglass. I can see right through it. Umm Guys. There is plexiglass here right? riiight? riiiiight? Umm Hey guys. GUYS !!!!!

--------------------------

The next chairman of the Democratic National Comittee holding to his promise to bring truth to politics unviels the new Democratic party mascot.

-------------

On a personal note I think Fustian has it hands down with his entry.

I don't need any crap from ... (Below threshold)
Knightbrigade:

I don't need any crap from you BULLY!
I'm skipping the border to Massachusetts, for free college tuition.

I Have Named This Bull "Al"... (Below threshold)

I Have Named This Bull "Al",Let The Games Begin.

Bullfighter to bull after g... (Below threshold)
Son of a Pig and a Monkey:

Bullfighter to bull after goring:

"Joo gad a lod o' splainin' to do"

Affordable healthcare?... (Below threshold)
Nylda:

Affordable healthcare?

"I wish I'd a had a V-8"</p... (Below threshold)
retired military:

"I wish I'd a had a V-8"

------------------------

A scene from the filmed autobiography of Al Gore shows that the film "Belmonte" was actually based on his exploits as a young man.

In his dreams, President Ma... (Below threshold)

In his dreams, President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad takes on John Bull. Sadly, the reality is worse: he's poking a sick old Jersey milk cow.

What the #@!%, please get m... (Below threshold)
elliot:

What the #@!%, please get me a bull who is not color blind!!!!!

What kind of world do You w... (Below threshold)
914:

What kind of world do You want? yeah yeah yeah

Be careful what u wish for Rosie

Spayding starts now!

"All of your bulls are belo... (Below threshold)
itismedavid:

"All of your bulls are belong to us!"

=========================================

You can gore my groin all you want, I lost the boys in 'Nam anyway.

"Your mama wears c... (Below threshold)
c:
"Your mama wears cowboy boots!" Posted by: Tom Blogical at March 30, 2007 12:42 PM

"Your mama is cowboy boots!"

"You looking for China shop... (Below threshold)
John F Not Kerry:

"You looking for China shop? 2 blocks down on the left!"

Bob misunderstood when his Mexican stockbroker said he should jump in to the "bull market."

Rosie gives in to media pre... (Below threshold)
914:

Rosie gives in to media presssure and makes an appearance on the View without makeup!

Her contribution to lobal farming!

Global dip- shit!... (Below threshold)
914:

Global dip- shit!

I meant Me as a dip-shit!</... (Below threshold)
914:

I meant Me as a dip-shit!

Ohh wtf.. Rosies a fat ugly heifer!..ok

Barnhouse gasses start now!

c:Yeah, I thought ... (Below threshold)

c:

Yeah, I thought about that one...but the thought of a cow wearing cowboy boots was just too funny to me!

Yes and tough on the leath... (Below threshold)
914:

Yes and tough on the leather too!!

Down on the corner... (Below threshold)
914:

Down on the corner

out here in the street

Rosie and the bull dykes r runnin

cause they hate white males like Me!

Well My darlin...U look wo... (Below threshold)
914:

Well My darlin...U look wonderbull tonight!

Sung to the beat of Layla!

Just try it! ha ha

I just changed u mere momen... (Below threshold)
914:

I just changed u mere moments ago u Tonkin tramp!

Spell check? is that right? buffalo lips?

The next photo in the serie... (Below threshold)

The next photo in the series became known as "Hole in Juan"...

In bullfighting, you're out... (Below threshold)

In bullfighting, you're out on ball two.

In retrospect, "Bullfightin... (Below threshold)

In retrospect, "Bullfighting with the Stars" was not such a great idea.

Brokeback Bullfight: I don'... (Below threshold)

Brokeback Bullfight: I don't know how to quit you...

Bruce had gone into bullfig... (Below threshold)

Bruce had gone into bullfighting, mostly for the costumes.

The bull is momentarily tak... (Below threshold)

The bull is momentarily taken aback as he realizes that Pedro is starting to get turned on.

Oh man, this is what actual... (Below threshold)

Oh man, this is what actually happened to this poor bastard:

IF Spanish matador Fernando Cruz ever has children, he will have doctors at the Valencia bullring to thank after he suffered a double goring.

Cruz, 25, is recovering in hospital after the second bull of yesterday's corrida caught him in the upper thigh, throwing him into the air, and gored him in the groin when he hit the ground.

Newspapers reproduced the eye-watering bulletin issued by surgeons at the bullring after a two-hour operation and film of the incident was played on the main evening news.

One report said his femur bone was visible after the goring and his scrotum was punctured.

"Fernando Cruz is suffering from two horn wounds of 25 centimetres in length each," a report from the city has said.

"One involves the fibres of the abductor muscle and dissects the femoral artery, the other involves the scrotal area and eviscerates both testicles."

They used to call him "Fern... (Below threshold)

They used to call him "Fernando Two Stones". Now they call him "Fernando Pea Gravel, the Childless".

And the bull's contract is ... (Below threshold)

And the bull's contract is a lock after he scored a another "sack" this afternoon against Fernando Cruz in the second corrida.

When asked to comment, Senor Cruz could only give out a piercing, high-pitched, wail.

President Bush Gives The Sa... (Below threshold)

President Bush Gives The Same Speech Over And Over And Over And ZZZZZZZZZ.

Blair Dare Phare, Si?... (Below threshold)
kim:

Blair Dare Phare, Si?
================

"The rain in Spain falls ma... (Below threshold)
LorenB:

"The rain in Spain falls main-ly on the Play-hayn. Ole!"

"Whazzis? I said I wanted m... (Below threshold)

"Whazzis? I said I wanted my steak rare."

Bruce Campbell: Say hello t... (Below threshold)
914:

Bruce Campbell: Say hello to My bullstick!

Al Gore attempts the tried ... (Below threshold)
retired military:

Al Gore attempts the tried and trued Democrat way of solving problems. He attempts to talk the bull out of contributing to the global warming problem via cow flatulance.

HA You call yourself a bull... (Below threshold)

HA You call yourself a bull??? Check out MY package!

Taco Bull's Gore-dita!... (Below threshold)

Taco Bull's Gore-dita!

Whadda you looking at! I do... (Below threshold)
elliot:

Whadda you looking at! I don't know the winner either.




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Section Editor: Maggie Whitton

Editors: Jay Tea, Lorie Byrd, Kim Priestap, DJ Drummond, Michael Laprarie, Baron Von Ottomatic, Shawn Mallow, Rick, Dan Karipides, Michael Avitablile, Charlie Quidnunc, Steve Schippert

Emeritus: Paul, Mary Katherine Ham, Jim Addison, Alexander K. McClure, Cassy Fiano, Bill Jempty, John Stansbury, Rob Port

In Memorium: HughS

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