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Wizbang Weekend Caption Contest™

It's Friday, which means it's time for the Wizbang Weekend Caption Contest™. Enter your best caption for the following picture:

Democratic presidential hopeful Sen. Hillary Clinton of New York reacts to seeing and old friend during a campaign stop at the National Education Association New Hampshire, in Concord, N.H., Friday, March 30, 2007. (AP Photo/Jim Cole)


Winners will be announced Sunday. Winners for last week's contest have been posted [a little later than originally plannned...].


Update: Winners announced. Click on the link to read the winning entries. The contest is now closed.


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Comments (240)

Et tu, Brute?=======... (Below threshold)
kim:

Et tu, Brute?
========

"That's not my husband's DN... (Below threshold)
DoninFla:

"That's not my husband's DNA on your dress, You dirty neocon whore, I'LL EAT YOUR FACE OFF!!!!"

I LOOK like the CRYPTkeeper... (Below threshold)
Candy:

I LOOK like the CRYPTkeeper!!!!!

Monica said it was like thi... (Below threshold)
TK:

Monica said it was like this.

BILL DID WHO?... (Below threshold)
Tom:

BILL DID WHO?

ATTACK OF THE KILLER SHREW<... (Below threshold)

ATTACK OF THE KILLER SHREW

"Will it fit now?"... (Below threshold)
drjohn:

"Will it fit now?"

I'll get you my pretty...an... (Below threshold)
Brad:

I'll get you my pretty...and your little dog too!

He wants to sleep with ME t... (Below threshold)
JKV:

He wants to sleep with ME tonight!?! You're his intern, you sleep with him!

Get me Howard Stern on the ... (Below threshold)
elliot:

Get me Howard Stern on the phone. If it works for Sanjaya it will work for me too.

Obama raised HOW MUCH?... (Below threshold)
Bob Smith:

Obama raised HOW MUCH?

Hillary reacts to the news ... (Below threshold)
elliot:

Hillary reacts to the news that even though she got 26 million to Obama's 25 million, Sanjaya received 30 million.

Hillary gives Nancy another... (Below threshold)
DaveD:

Hillary gives Nancy another shot at correctly answering who the most powerful woman in America is.

Damn-it I said bring me Ass... (Below threshold)
JAT:

Damn-it I said bring me Assad's nuts, not these Syrian goobers you idiot!

Hillary reacts to the news ... (Below threshold)
Dodo David:

Hillary reacts to the news that Bill has been secretly endorsing Obama.

Im meelllttting -ohhh what ... (Below threshold)
pretzel_logic:

Im meelllttting -ohhh what a world what wooooooooooorld...

Do you know how long its be... (Below threshold)

Do you know how long its been since i've actually had one of "those" in here?!?

Observers marvel at the lif... (Below threshold)
guido:

Observers marvel at the lifelike images on display at Madame Tussaud's 'Chamber of Horrors' exhibit.

"If you had to wake up ever... (Below threshold)
Dodo David:

"If you had to wake up every morning to see this, then you would commit adultery, too." - Bill Clinton

Repost!LET THE EEE... (Below threshold)
Pat:

Repost!

LET THE EEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGLE SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRR!!!!

Snuke!!!... (Below threshold)
Baron Von Ottomatic:

Snuke!!!

"My Precious . . . Where is... (Below threshold)
Dodo David:

"My Precious . . . Where is my Precious?"

The "Snuke" has been plante... (Below threshold)
guido:

The "Snuke" has been planted.
(http://tv.ign.com/articles/776/776961p1.html)

"You can't handle the truth... (Below threshold)

"You can't handle the truth!"

Nobody wanted to hear Hilla... (Below threshold)
Baron Von Ottomatic:

Nobody wanted to hear Hillary's unique rendition of The Immigrant Song, yet not a single soul even considered stifling her.

"I want to take those profi... (Below threshold)

"I want to take those profits..."

I'll show you "mule eating ... (Below threshold)
Baron Von Ottomatic:

I'll show you "mule eating an apple through a picket fence!"

No wire hangers EVER!... (Below threshold)
Rev, Mike:

No wire hangers EVER!

...Hillary then held aloft ... (Below threshold)
Baron Von Ottomatic:

...Hillary then held aloft the still beating heart, took a hearty bite, and declared the vast right wing conspiracy dead. Or at least scared shitless.

Would You Hand a Black Brie... (Below threshold)

Would You Hand a Black Briefcase to This Woman?

"If you want him, you can h... (Below threshold)
Mike:

"If you want him, you can have him"

Chrome off a trailer hitch ... (Below threshold)
Baron Von Ottomatic:

Chrome off a trailer hitch is nothing, I can suck the toupee off a bald man at twenty paces.

I'll huff and I'll puff and... (Below threshold)
Baron Von Ottomatic:

I'll huff and I'll puff and I'll blow your house down!

"No... wire... hangers. Wh... (Below threshold)

"No... wire... hangers. What's wire hangers doing in this closet when I told you: no wire hangers EVER?!"

Hillary finally fulfills he... (Below threshold)
Baron Von Ottomatic:

Hillary finally fulfills her lifelong dream of being caricatured driving a totally gnarly, flame-belching hot rod on the cover of Car-Toons magazine.

...or President Hillary wit... (Below threshold)
Baron Von Ottomatic:

...or President Hillary with her big toe is going to see how far she can stick it up your ass.

Rev, Mike: yer killin' me! ... (Below threshold)

Rev, Mike: yer killin' me! Great minds think alike.

There once was a lady Senat... (Below threshold)
Robert the original:

There once was a lady Senator,
With a husband she knew not what for.
But he got the last laugh,
When he broke it in half,
And iced the front of the vibrator.

"You wouldn't be able to do... (Below threshold)

"You wouldn't be able to do these awful things to me if I weren't still in this chair as Speaker!"

"But cha AAH, Nancy, ya AAH in that chair!!"

DRUDGEBREAKING: VoteForT... (Below threshold)

DRUDGEBREAKING: VoteForTheWorst.com has taken on a more onerous task... Developing

"This is my happy fa... (Below threshold)

"This is my happy face. You wouldn't like me when I'm angry."

Hillary reprises her role a... (Below threshold)
Sabba Hillel:

Hillary reprises her role as "the Senator" on the last season of Angel

Queefing the high notes of ... (Below threshold)

Queefing the high notes of the Star Spangled Banner caused Senator Clinton a certain change of appearance.

"No Senator Clinton, I don'... (Below threshold)

"No Senator Clinton, I don't know the Heimlich either."

"I told you your face would... (Below threshold)

"I told you your face would get stuck like that."

"I'm sorry Senator I'll try... (Below threshold)

"I'm sorry Senator I'll try, but I'm no good a charades... let's see... OK, a Democrat Party Sperm bank?"

Brains! Brains!! Live brai... (Below threshold)
Baron Von Ottomatic:

Brains! Brains!! Live brains! Brains!!!

Your mother sucks c*cks in ... (Below threshold)
JamesT:

Your mother sucks c*cks in Hell, Karras, you faithless slime!!!

It is my Democratic nominat... (Below threshold)
Tango:

It is my Democratic nomination Nurse Ratched, mine, mine!

"You get one more chance to... (Below threshold)

"You get one more chance to agree, or I'll hurl Pea Soup in your face."

"If you're the Devil, then ... (Below threshold)

"If you're the Devil, then why not make Obama disappear?"

"That's much too vulgar a display of power, Pelosi."

"I'm a mushroom cloud layin... (Below threshold)
markm:

"I'm a mushroom cloud layin' muther fu*ker muther fu*ker, i'm the guns of the Navarone!!"

Now we all know Whatever Ha... (Below threshold)

Now we all know Whatever Happened to Baby Jane.

"How many times have I told... (Below threshold)

"How many times have I told you, Christina? NO...MORE...WIRE....HANGERRRRS!"

In this candid shot, NY Sen... (Below threshold)
WindowDressing:

In this candid shot, NY Senator and presidential candidate Hillary Clinton is shown moments before she bit the tongue out of a reporter who was inquiring about her relationship with former White House aide Vince Foster.

. . . but apparently it's ... (Below threshold)
woody:

. . . but apparently it's more about technique than how wide you can open your mouth . . .

"I'm gonna rip the eyes out... (Below threshold)

"I'm gonna rip the eyes out of your head and p**s in your dead skull! You f****d with the wrong Democrat!"

PAULA !!!... (Below threshold)
Mike:

PAULA !!!

"I suppose I could have sta... (Below threshold)
Culler:

"I suppose I could have stayed home and baked cookies and had teas, but what I decided to do was to fulfill my profession which I entered before my husband was in public life."

Hill's acting coach preps h... (Below threshold)
D-lo:

Hill's acting coach preps her for the Factor

I don't know about anyone e... (Below threshold)

I don't know about anyone else, but I'm definitely finding a better hiding spot for my chocolate Easter bunnies this year.

Things I despise (revised l... (Below threshold)
JJ:

Things I despise (revised list):

1) Blue Dresses
2) Women who spell their names with "G" instead of "J"
3) Stay-at-home moms
4) Skinny black men with $25 million in the coffer

It takes a f**king village,... (Below threshold)
JJ:

It takes a f**king village, damn it!

Let them eat cookies!... (Below threshold)
JJ:

Let them eat cookies!

Why yes, I have been scratc... (Below threshold)
Baron Von Ottomatic:

Why yes, I have been scratching my ass and biting my fingernails. And no, I don't want a Tic Tac.

And she wants to be our lat... (Below threshold)
Brad:

And she wants to be our latex salesman....

Vavoom!... (Below threshold)
Baron Von Ottomatic:

Vavoom!

It takes a viilage like New... (Below threshold)
Timmy G:

It takes a viilage like New Square, N.Y., damn it!

The Hillasaurus Velocirotha... (Below threshold)
Faith+1:

The Hillasaurus Velocirotham is capable of completely unhinging it's jaw when swallowing it's prey live.

As advertised, users of Hil... (Below threshold)
Baron Von Ottomatic:

As advertised, users of Hillary! brand condoms quickly found themselves as impotent as a UN weapons inspector.

Ms Clinton, in an unusually... (Below threshold)
Faith+1:

Ms Clinton, in an unusually good mood, puts on her best smile while going over her day's itinerary with her assistant.

Whaddya mean my fly is down... (Below threshold)
Nylda:

Whaddya mean my fly is down?

Bimbo Eruption.... (Below threshold)
John:

Bimbo Eruption.

YOU MEAN I'M NOT REALLY BLA... (Below threshold)
Insomniac:

YOU MEAN I'M NOT REALLY BLACK!!!!?????

Mrs. Clinton's response to ... (Below threshold)

Mrs. Clinton's response to the question:

Mrs. Clinton, if you could'nt find that Bill was cheating on you in the white house how could you expect to find Bin Laden? it's not like Bill infidelity was top sectret information.

"CAN'T YOU HEAR ME!!?? I SA... (Below threshold)

"CAN'T YOU HEAR ME!!?? I SAID SOMENONE SNUCK A SNUKE UP MY SNIZZ!!"

"TONIGHT WE DINE IN HELL!!!... (Below threshold)

"TONIGHT WE DINE IN HELL!!!"

Linda Trippppp!!!!!!! run..... (Below threshold)

Linda Trippppp!!!!!!! run.....

This campaign sponsored by ... (Below threshold)
Matt:

This campaign sponsored by the mini-series "V"

In this still from the movi... (Below threshold)
Joel:

In this still from the movie Aliens, the Alien queen prepares to drive her second set of jaws into Ripley's forehead during their final battle onboard the Sulacco.

Hillary Clinton on investme... (Below threshold)
Tell The Truth:

Hillary Clinton on investments in cattle futures:

"Buy low and sell high. Why, who have you been talking to? Have you heard something else? Does anyone need to be rubbed out?"

Obama raised how much???</p... (Below threshold)
pretzel_logic:

Obama raised how much???

...and right in the middle ... (Below threshold)
Joel:

...and right in the middle of her passionate rendition of "God Bless America" Senator Clinton horrifically realizes that she's been singing the Soviet version she learned at Wellesley College.

"This is SPARTA!!!!"<... (Below threshold)
jpm100:

"This is SPARTA!!!!"

You see, I almost got the part.

Listen you ignorant bitch, ... (Below threshold)
SpeedPump:

Listen you ignorant bitch, from now on "White Water" is "Blanc Eau," got it? Now fetch me a Fresca.

A pledge pin! On your unif... (Below threshold)
Baron Von Ottomatic:

A pledge pin! On your uniform?!?

"He said that I looked very... (Below threshold)
billburz:

"He said that I looked very pretty, so I said to him, thank you very much."

Senator Clinton reco... (Below threshold)
observer:


Senator Clinton recoils in horror from a supporter's crucifix.

Hillary! reacts to sunlight... (Below threshold)
John in CA:

Hillary! reacts to sunlight, garlic, and a crucifix. The other woman also has holy water and a wooden stake, just in case.

THERE'S NO MORE RICE KRISPI... (Below threshold)

THERE'S NO MORE RICE KRISPIES!! SOMEONE ATE MY RICE KRISPIES!!!!!!

DRUDGEBREAKING: Chelsea Cli... (Below threshold)

DRUDGEBREAKING: Chelsea Clinton recalls only knowing of the Easter groundhog from her childhood. Developing...

Nancy, so this is how you s... (Below threshold)
Corky Boyd:

Nancy, so this is how you stetch your face and give that wide eyed look. Always wondered how you did it. Thanks Ms. Pelosi.

"I'm... being... scanned...... (Below threshold)

"I'm... being... scanned..."

"No Senator, I said we shou... (Below threshold)

"No Senator, I said we should conduct an Annual probe on your likelyhood to be elected."

"AH DON'T FEEEEL NO WAYS TA... (Below threshold)
LISA:

"AH DON'T FEEEEL NO WAYS TAHRED..."

Dick Cheney's bathrobe acci... (Below threshold)
SideShowJane:

Dick Cheney's bathrobe accidentally opens as he reaches down for the morning paper.

By the mercy of Gawduh...HE... (Below threshold)
FormerHostage:

By the mercy of Gawduh...HEAL!

Remember how mothers always... (Below threshold)
FormerHostage:

Remember how mothers always used to tell their children to stop making faces or they'd freeze like that? Well....

Twas brillig, and the s... (Below threshold)
Faith+1:

Twas brillig, and the slithy toves
Did gyre and gimble in the wabe;
All mimsy were the borogoves,
And the mome raths outgrabe.

'Beware the Jabberwock, my son!
The jaws that bite, the claws that catch!
Beware the Jubjub bird, and shun
The frumious Bandersnatch!'

Isn't there supposed to be,... (Below threshold)
FormerHostage:

Isn't there supposed to be, like, a flame or something coming out of that maw?

Just realized the the last ... (Below threshold)
Faith+1:

Just realized the the last line of last post would be a better caption with a tweak.

New submission:

"The Frumious Bandersnuke!"

Hillary shrieking to the re... (Below threshold)
Bungalowlife:

Hillary shrieking to the record producer after listening to the 39th version of her campaign them song "Don't Fear the Reaper": "How many times do I have to say this - MORE COWBELL!!"

"No tears please. It's a w... (Below threshold)

"No tears please. It's a waste of good suffering. I will tear your soul apart."

With a rebel yell...Hillary... (Below threshold)
Baron Von Ottomatic:

With a rebel yell...Hillary's faux Southern accent jumped the shark, Shamu, a dolphin tank, and the whole damned Sea World parking lot.

"I am the god of hell fire,... (Below threshold)

"I am the god of hell fire, and I bring you..."

"Honey, this is an "O" face... (Below threshold)
pedrovex:

"Honey, this is an "O" face."

Rodney, loved the Scanner r... (Below threshold)

Rodney, loved the Scanner reference...but the one about the Star Spangled banner is disturbing! ;-)

Do not utter the nam... (Below threshold)
DJ Drummond:

Do not utter the name "Obama" in my presence!

Hillary's tolerance for hot... (Below threshold)

Hillary's tolerance for hot, spicy foods is put to the test by Nancy's 4-Alarm "I'm the Queen Bee, Dammit" Habanero Chile.

"What!? You spent 3 days in... (Below threshold)

"What!? You spent 3 days in Damascus and all you're giving me is a lousy T-shirt?"

"Somebody took my southern ... (Below threshold)

"Somebody took my southern accent. Was it you? If it was, I swear I'll have your head on a spike!"

Warning: unhinged screaming... (Below threshold)

Warning: unhinged screaming maniacs in the mirror are closer than they appear.

"Run for your life! Dick C... (Below threshold)

"Run for your life! Dick Cheney is headed this way and he's NOT WEARING ANY PANTS!"

It Takes A Village to raise... (Below threshold)

It Takes A Village to raise a child. Well, either that or a whole lot of yelling and screaming.

"SHUT UP! Sanjaya STILL is... (Below threshold)

"SHUT UP! Sanjaya STILL isn't kicked off yet?"

"No, Simon. I'M the next Am... (Below threshold)
Peter F.:

"No, Simon. I'M the next American Idol!"

"Why, yes, I did see Nancy ... (Below threshold)
Peter F.:

"Why, yes, I did see Nancy Pelosi's plastic surgeon. How could you tell?"

"So I said 'No, no, Monica,... (Below threshold)
Peter F.:

"So I said 'No, no, Monica, THIS is how you do it...'"

Nancy knew that when she ja... (Below threshold)

Nancy knew that when she jammed the stiletto between the senator's ribs, the next thing she'd see would be a thin trickle of blood running down from the corner of her mouth.

"Calm down, Mrs. Clinton, w... (Below threshold)

"Calm down, Mrs. Clinton, what if your face froze that way?"

Oh My God!!That stain! I wo... (Below threshold)
914:

Oh My God!!That stain! I would recognize it anywhere!

Nancy how dare You go to Sy... (Below threshold)
914:

Nancy how dare You go to Syria without My permission!

No wonder Willie prefered M... (Below threshold)
914:

No wonder Willie prefered Monicas mouth?

What do you mean - you're o... (Below threshold)

What do you mean - you're out of Strivectin?!?!?!?!?

You stupid twit! I said pa... (Below threshold)

You stupid twit! I said pack my thong underwear, not my long underwear! Now, how am I going to convince the public that I believe in global warming?

"Obama! Get in mah belly!"... (Below threshold)

"Obama! Get in mah belly!"

The last time I saw a mouth... (Below threshold)
guido:

The last time I saw a mouth like that, it had a hook in it.

"Halitosis"... (Below threshold)
_Mike_:

"Halitosis"

"Bitch, I'm not playin'. Yo... (Below threshold)

"Bitch, I'm not playin'. You gonna be the nine-toe havingest, limpin'est bitch in Harlem, you don't put that razor away!"

"Jennifer! I haven't seen y... (Below threshold)
_Mike_:

"Jennifer! I haven't seen you since Bill... AH!"

"You can't handle my truth!... (Below threshold)
iurockhead:

"You can't handle my truth!"

In this just released photo... (Below threshold)
_Mike_:

In this just released photo, we see Senator Clintons reaction when Nancy Pelosi referred to herself as the most powerful women in the world.


@Tom Blogical
like the Harlem Nights reference - back when Eddie was funny.

Thats the wrong hole Bill!<... (Below threshold)
914:

Thats the wrong hole Bill!

NO... OTHER... MINORITIES. ... (Below threshold)
kbiel:

NO... OTHER... MINORITIES. What's Obama doing in this race when I told you: no other minorities EVER? I work and work 'till I'm half-dead, and I hear people saying, "She's getting old." And what do I get? A staffer... who cares as much about the campaign I give her... as she cares about me. What's Obama doing in this race? Answer me. I buy you black leaders, and you treat the campaign like it were some dishrag. You do. .... Get up. Get up. Clean up this Obama mess.

The Harpy... (Below threshold)
914:

The Harpy

For the last time, I only l... (Below threshold)
rita:

For the last time, I only lived in Arkansas. I'M NOT FROM THERE!

_Mike_: Yeah, he hasn't be... (Below threshold)

_Mike_: Yeah, he hasn't been funny for a while now...and I should have replaced Harlem with Washington...

((( A blood curdling Bansh... (Below threshold)
914:

((( A blood curdling Banshee )))

I'm gonna audition for an a... (Below threshold)
Locomotive Breath:

I'm gonna audition for an alien in the next Star Trek movie. Whaddya think?

Bill used to call Me angelf... (Below threshold)
914:

Bill used to call Me angelface

used ta call Me angleface

He used to help Me thru the night

make Me feel alright

now all I have are teardrops thru a lonely night

I've come for your soul!</p... (Below threshold)

I've come for your soul!

(obscure movie reference - ... (Below threshold)

(obscure movie reference - Total Recall)

"I'm going on vacation. To Mars...Mars...Marzach...aarrggh"

I TOLD YOU, NANCY, THE PRES... (Below threshold)
Dale A:

I TOLD YOU, NANCY, THE PRESIDENCY AND THE STATE DEPARTMENT ARE MINE! MINE! MINE!

I've come to suck Your bloo... (Below threshold)
914:

I've come to suck Your blood!

"This is the exact look tha... (Below threshold)
Nancy:

"This is the exact look that will be on the entire White House Secret Service detachment if I get elected."

Mirror, mirror, on the wall... (Below threshold)
newlife:

Mirror, mirror, on the wall.....

" So glad no As$ H*I{ phot... (Below threshold)
just me:

" So glad no As$ H*I{ photographed that, I might be put on a blog and mocked for no good reason "

GGGGRRHHHHGGGG You mean tha... (Below threshold)
914:

GGGGRRHHHHGGGG You mean that was holy water?? hssssssssssss!

Can you believe Bill would ... (Below threshold)
Baron Von Ottomatic:

Can you believe Bill would rather stick his gravy-soaked head in a lion's mouth than dangle his manhood near...

Last time I saw a mouth lik... (Below threshold)
Baron Von Ottomatic:

Last time I saw a mouth like that it had a forked tongue in it!

THE TRUTH!!! YOU CAN'T HAN... (Below threshold)
ozone64:

THE TRUTH!!! YOU CAN'T HANDLE THE TRUTH!!!!!
Hey?? What is the truth, anyway??

"A census taker once tried ... (Below threshold)

"A census taker once tried to test me. I ate her liver with some fava beans and a nice chianti."

I...MUST...FEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE... (Below threshold)
Tim Murphy:

I...MUST...FEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEED

"Hey...wanna hear the most ... (Below threshold)

"Hey...wanna hear the most annoying sound in the world? AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!"

Hilary Clinton meets Paula ... (Below threshold)
Eric:

Hilary Clinton meets Paula Jones for the first time.

"BRAINS! BRAINS! I can sme... (Below threshold)
Eric:

"BRAINS! BRAINS! I can smell your BRAINS!"

"Open up and say AHHH!"... (Below threshold)
Eric:

"Open up and say AHHH!"

Hilary Clinton at her semi-annual visit to the proctologist.

Longtime Wizbang reader Hil... (Below threshold)

Longtime Wizbang reader Hillary Rodham Clinton reacts to the once again unfulfilled promise that caption contest results from last week "will be posted later this morning."

Jurassic Park IV: Attack of... (Below threshold)
VagaBond:

Jurassic Park IV: Attack of the Hillaropter

"Hee hee hee ha ha! Going ... (Below threshold)
Craig:

"Hee hee hee ha ha! Going so soon? I wouldn't hear of it! Why, my little party's just beginning!"

"Nooooooo wire hangers!... ... (Below threshold)
Craig:

"Nooooooo wire hangers!... Nooooooo wire hangers ever!!"

No, Chaka was a pakuni. Th... (Below threshold)
Baron Von Ottomatic:

No, Chaka was a pakuni. The sleestaks Coptix Photoshopped into that Rove photo looked more like this...

"SERENITY NOW!!!"... (Below threshold)

"SERENITY NOW!!!"

They found what $ in My fre... (Below threshold)
914:

They found what $ in My freezer

Uh, Mrs Clinton - are you S... (Below threshold)
thecomputerguy:

Uh, Mrs Clinton - are you SURE that's how you want to pose for your passport photo?

Eanie meanie whiny mo... (Below threshold)
914:

Eanie meanie whiny mo

Catch Obama by the dough

If He hollers make Him pay

Cause Im the Queen of the USA

"It's FRIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII... (Below threshold)

"It's FRIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII-DAAAAAAAAAYYYYYY!"

As seen here in the wild, t... (Below threshold)

As seen here in the wild, the Hildabeast first attempts to stun it's prey by emitting a loud, banshee-like shriek.

Guido's entry should be a w... (Below threshold)
Dodo David:

Guido's entry should be a winner. His entry says this: "The last time I saw a mouth like that, it had a hook in it."

Baron Von Ottomatic wrote, ... (Below threshold)
Dodo David:

Baron Von Ottomatic wrote, "Last time I saw a mouth like that it had a forked tongue in it!"

Baron, the mouth in the above photo does have a forked tongue in it.

The above caption is rated... (Below threshold)
914:

The above caption is rated R

viewer discretion is advised

"AND I AM TELLING YOU THAT ... (Below threshold)
retired military:

"AND I AM TELLING YOU THAT I AM THE WINNER OF LAST WEEK'S CAPTION CONTEST!!!! THEY JUST HAVENT FINISHED THE RECOUNTS YET!!!!.

"Yeah though I walk through... (Below threshold)
retired military:

"Yeah though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death I will fear no VRWC. For the MSM spin and antirepublican hack jobs gude me to the green pastures where Al Gore waits. "

--------------------------------------

Hillary attempts to improve her fundraising appeal to large mouth bass fishermen.

---------------------


"Cant we all just get along"

------------------------

"Give peace a chance"

------------------------

"And here we see a prime example of the deadly blowfish. A single drop of their venom is enough to kill, expecially young interns who wear thongs.

"This doesn't have to hurt.... (Below threshold)

"This doesn't have to hurt. Just think of yourself as lunch!"

MORE COWBELL!!!... (Below threshold)
CharlieDontSurf:

MORE COWBELL!!!

Hillary: "Did you know W... (Below threshold)
elliot:

Hillary: "Did you know Winners for last week's contest have been selected and will be posted later this morning...."
Assistant: "Hmm, it's now 11PM. Well, they must be with the WMD's cause I can't find them Hillary."

Next on Animal Planet. When... (Below threshold)
smitty:

Next on Animal Planet. When domestic politicians attack!

"This is my F#%*ING ... (Below threshold)
rocketman:


"This is my F#%*ING happy face bitch!"

This is the last thing Vinc... (Below threshold)

This is the last thing Vince Foster saw.

The national press corps ac... (Below threshold)

The national press corps accidentally asks Sen. Clinton a substantive question.

Looks like Bill's dating ag... (Below threshold)

Looks like Bill's dating again.

Someone needs a Midol, stat... (Below threshold)

Someone needs a Midol, stat!

It's not a snuke, it's a Pr... (Below threshold)
jc:

It's not a snuke, it's a Preperation H-bomb!

Hillary to New Unpaid Inter... (Below threshold)
Chris G:

Hillary to New Unpaid Intern Applicant - "Look!!You have to open your mouth this wide to get the job doen right"

If Bill Clinton's so smart,... (Below threshold)

If Bill Clinton's so smart, how come he got himself saddled with this nightmare in a pantsuit?

"I'll SHOW you how Bill got... (Below threshold)
La Mano:

"I'll SHOW you how Bill got his bent willie!"

Holy cow, the irony, an exo... (Below threshold)
La Mano:

Holy cow, the irony, an exorcism on Good Friday.

Chelsea knew that the news ... (Below threshold)

Chelsea knew that the news that she had been dating Rush Limbaugh would reach Mom eventually...

"Your mother sucks c*cks in... (Below threshold)
La Mano:

"Your mother sucks c*cks in hell!"

(An original Exorcist citation for the younger ones)

This is why they keep Hilla... (Below threshold)

This is why they keep Hillary out of the public eye until the full moon passes.

Democratic presidential hop... (Below threshold)

Democratic presidential hopeful Sen. Hillary Clinton of New York reacts to seeing old friend Juanita Brodderick during a campaign stop in Concord, New Hampshire.

"INFIDEL!!!"... (Below threshold)
barry in co:

"INFIDEL!!!"

(With apologies to General ... (Below threshold)
barry in co:

(With apologies to General Zod...)

"You WILL bow down before me!"

!!!!BRAINS!!!!!</... (Below threshold)
Lonevoice:

!!!!BRAINS!!!!!

"Haaaaaaa......aaa. I don't... (Below threshold)
Bollimuntha Venkata Ramana:

"Haaaaaaa......aaa. I don't believe that news"

Hillary is not reacting wel... (Below threshold)

Hillary is not reacting well to the news that Juanita Brodderick is leading a group called "Bill's Raped Women for Truth".

Oh, and they've put together their first ad.

BBRRRAAAIIIINNNNNNSSSS!!</p... (Below threshold)
WL Dewhurst:

BBRRRAAAIIIINNNNNNSSSS!!

"Life's a bitch, and so am ... (Below threshold)

"Life's a bitch, and so am I."

Hillary quietly explains to... (Below threshold)

Hillary quietly explains to the young lady that interns do not turn down sexual advances from Senators.

The staffer knows that Hill... (Below threshold)

The staffer knows that Hillary can get a little "peckish" when she hasn't feasted recently on human blood.

The Botox just wore off.</p... (Below threshold)

The Botox just wore off.

Hillary snaps after one too... (Below threshold)

Hillary snaps after one too many listening tours, and now she's going to tell us a thing or two.

After a long day of "listen... (Below threshold)

After a long day of "listening to the cares of average Americans", Hillary winds down by screaming at an intern for 30 minutes or so.

On the day they conceived C... (Below threshold)

On the day they conceived Chelsea, Bill had to relax Hillary with a couple of glasses of wine and a date rape drug.

"You charged that to MY acc... (Below threshold)
DJ Drummond:

"You charged that to MY account?!?

Listen, you little bleeding heart, MY job is to LEAD AMERICA and your job is to AGREE and PAY FOR IT!!!"

Barry Manilow is loking kin... (Below threshold)

Barry Manilow is loking kind of rough thee days.

Barry Manilow is loking kin... (Below threshold)

Barry Manilow is loking kind of rough these days.

"I said, 'Pull my... (Below threshold)
LorenB:

"I said, 'Pull my finger!'"

Impressions? Sure... (Below threshold)
capitano:

Impressions?

Sure, I do a couple of good ones. Here's my Eleanor Roosevelt.

Yes, that is what I said! W... (Below threshold)
Jeff Blogworthy:

Yes, that is what I said! We're going to take things away from you for the common good!

Upon noticing an old friend... (Below threshold)
Jeff Blogworthy:

Upon noticing an old friend, Hillary Clinton gives her customary greeting:

I said keep two steps behind at all times you stupid bitch! Do you understand me? Two steps behind!

"You tell Jay Tea I don't g... (Below threshold)

"You tell Jay Tea I don't give a S*** who he thinks he is, I'm gonna stick his Olaf's Hammer right up his A**!!!"

"Idiot! When I said I was g... (Below threshold)

"Idiot! When I said I was going on a 'listening tour', I was speaking metaphorically!"

"Ia! Ia! Cthulhu ftaghn! Ph... (Below threshold)

"Ia! Ia! Cthulhu ftaghn! Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu Rl'yeh wgah'nagl ftaghn!"


(I can't believe it took 200+ comments before the first Lovecraft reference showed up)

"Blood for Odin!"... (Below threshold)

"Blood for Odin!"

At long last, the lost epis... (Below threshold)
William d'Inger:

At long last, the lost episode of the X-Files surfaces.

After her pitiful attempt a... (Below threshold)

After her pitiful attempt at singing the Star Spangled Banner, Hillary starts to take music lessons from Sanjaya.

Turtleneck poop... (Below threshold)
914:

Turtleneck poop

Breaking up is hard to do</... (Below threshold)
First Alaskan Man:

Breaking up is hard to do

I am sick and tired of this... (Below threshold)
914:

I am sick and tired of this administation telling us were unpatriotic because We cut off funding!

Im mad as hellllll and Im not gonna take it anymore!!!

First were going to Little Rock then LA then chicago then were gonna take back the White House1!YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEHHHHHHHAAAAWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!

Mr. deVille, I'm ready for ... (Below threshold)
Mike:

Mr. deVille, I'm ready for my closeup.

Defense Exhibit #1 - Clinto... (Below threshold)
jim:

Defense Exhibit #1 - Clinton vs. Clinton

Next on FOX. When domestic ... (Below threshold)
smitty:

Next on FOX. When domestic politicians attack!

I don't care if it is Bill'... (Below threshold)
Paul:

I don't care if it is Bill's birthday party! I'm not going to sing "Devil in a Blue Dress"!

There once was a senator na... (Below threshold)
LochLomand:

There once was a senator named Hilary,
Whose behavior was known to be scary.
She woke up famished one day,
And to her intern did say,
"Give me your all of your blood; I'm hungry."

TNKS to "robert the original" for inspiration.

"If I were king of the fore... (Below threshold)

"If I were king of the fore-e-e-est...I'd command each thing, whether fish or fowl...With a r-r-ruff and a r-r-ruff, and a royal growl - R-R-Ruff!"

"KHAAAAAAAAAANNNNN!!!"... (Below threshold)

"KHAAAAAAAAAANNNNN!!!"

See?! I can open my mouth t... (Below threshold)
Rich M.:

See?! I can open my mouth that wide!

It puts the lotion on its s... (Below threshold)
Rich M:

It puts the lotion on its skin or else it gets the hose again!

Sen. Clinton displays how s... (Below threshold)
itismedavid:

Sen. Clinton displays how she got the nickname "Hill-dog"

Hillary once worried of pen... (Below threshold)
kim:

Hillary once worried of penury.
It's only a quite recent memory.
The payoff, you say,
Was One Hundred Kay?
Except it was minus one penny.
=============================

Slickster: Please tell Me I... (Below threshold)
914:

Slickster: Please tell Me I did not have sex with that Woman!

My favorite was 'No more oa... (Below threshold)
kim:

My favorite was 'No more oat bangers' at 1:33PM, 4/6.
=============================

What do you mean there is n... (Below threshold)
Andrew Gregowicz:

What do you mean there is no Right Wing Conspiracy

"And I call this face my "I... (Below threshold)
retired military:

"And I call this face my "I'm so angry and I'm not going to take it anymore face" now my next face is when I kiss babies and it looks ...."

"I'm gonna win this preside... (Below threshold)
TLS:

"I'm gonna win this presidency whether anyone likes it or not!"

Give r another sugar cube W... (Below threshold)
914:

Give r another sugar cube Wilbur

Obama raised HOW MUCH???</p... (Below threshold)
CharlieDontSurf:

Obama raised HOW MUCH???

"I know the winner of last ... (Below threshold)
retired military:

"I know the winner of last week and this week's caption contest is in there somewhere. Just keep looking dammit!!"

Update: <... (Below threshold)

Update: Winners announced. Click on the link to read the winning entries. The constest is now closed.

Winners for last week's contest have been posted as well.




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Editors: Jay Tea, Lorie Byrd, Kim Priestap, DJ Drummond, Michael Laprarie, Baron Von Ottomatic, Shawn Mallow, Rick, Dan Karipides, Michael Avitablile, Charlie Quidnunc, Steve Schippert

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In Memorium: HughS

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