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The Good Side of Global Warming: It Will Depopulate Conservatives

Today we have a leftist nut writing at the Baltimore Chronicle and Sentinel who says that global warming will cause flooding in vast amounts of "red" states, depopulating those areas of evil conservatives. That, he says, is global warming's silver lining:

The area that will by completely inundated by the rising ocean--and not in a century but in the lifetime of my two cats--are the American southeast, including the most populated area of Texas, almost all of Florida, most of Louisiana, and half of Alabama and Mississippi, as well as goodly portions of eastern Georgia, South Carolina and North Carolina. While the northeast will also see some coastal flooding, its geography is such that that aside from a few projecting sandbars like Long Island and Cape Cod, the land rises fairly quickly to well above sea level. Sure, Boston, New York and Philadelphia will be threatened, but these are geographically confined areas that could lend themselves to protection by Dutch-style dikes. The West Coast too tends to rise rapidly to well above sea level in most places. Only down in Southern California towards the San Diego area is the ground closer to sea level.

So what we see is that huge swaths of conservative America are set to face a biblical deluge in a few more presidential cycles.

Then there's the matter of the Midwest, which climate experts say is likely to face a permanent condition of unprecedented drought, making the place largely unlivable, and certainly unfarmable. The agribusinesses and conservative farmers that have been growing corn and wheat may be able to stretch out this doomsday scenario by deep well drilling, but west of the Mississippi, the vast Ogallala Aquifer that has allowed for such irrigation is already being tapped out. It will not be replaced.

So again, we will see the decline and depopulation of the nation's vast midsection--noted for its consistent conservatism. Only in the northernmost area, around the Great Lakes (which will be not so great anymore), and along the Canadian border, will there still be enough rain for farming and continued large population concentrations, but those regions, like Minnesota, Wisconsin and Illinois, are also more liberal in their politics.

Finally, in the Southwest, already parched and stiflingly hot, the rise in energy costs and the soaring temperatures will put an end to right-wing retirement communities like Phoenix, Tucson and Palm Springs. Already the Salton Sea is fading away and putting Palm Springs on notice that the good times are coming to an end. Another right-wing haven soon to be gone.

So the future political map of America is likely to look as different as the much shrunken geographical map, with much of the so-called "red" state region either gone or depopulated.

There is a poetic justice to this of course. It is conservatives who are giving us the candidates who steadfastly refuse to have the nation take steps that could slow the pace of climate change, so it is appropriate that they should bear the brunt of its impact.

Too bad this guy's hopes will be dashed when the earth's warming trend retreats and moves into a cooling cycle as it did in the seventies. Then he'll probably write about how the silver lining of the coming ice age is that it will freeze out the red state conservatives who won't take up the cause of global cooling.


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Comments (39)

I don't suppose it occurred... (Below threshold)
SATerp:

I don't suppose it occurred to that moron, that, if he were correct, the conservatives would move to the blue states, taking them over?

SAT, what a valid point. I... (Below threshold)
J.R.:

SAT, what a valid point. It apparently escapes this mental midget that people will move away from the rising waters as they rise. Of course I do not believe such a thing is going to happen, but this guy seems to think the waters will rise in one big wave as in "the Day After Tomorrow."

Whats the point of being a ... (Below threshold)
Liberal Nitemare:

Whats the point of being a liberal if you cant punish people for disagreeing with you?


But the most liberal footho... (Below threshold)

But the most liberal footholds are on the coast. NYCity, LA, Sanfransciso, Seattle. It seems to me most of them would not life a finger to save themselves waiting instead for the wet nurse government to save them.

Just when I think liberals ... (Below threshold)
WildWillie:

Just when I think liberals cannot get any more stupid... ww

Its an amazing video(bottom... (Below threshold)
Pretzel_Logic:

Its an amazing video(bottom of the piece) really, watching these people. The guy talked and talked and really didnt say anything except Bush and Cheney need to be impeached.

RobertBut the m... (Below threshold)
marc:

Robert

But the most liberal footholds are on the coast. NYCity, LA, Sanfransciso, Seattle. It seems to me most of them would not life a finger to save themselves waiting instead for the wet nurse government to save them.
Gee... 1964 revisited!

Goodby all you Red Staters!

Owning Property in both Las... (Below threshold)
Vegas Vic:

Owning Property in both Las Vegas and Florida, it looks like I'm really in trouble. However thanks to the Baltimore Chronicle and Sentinel and Mr. Dave "loopy" Lindorff, I know now the place the buy property is BALTIMORE! Can you say Howdy Neighbor, where's the closest Wal-Mart!

According to the gren nut w... (Below threshold)
Spurwing Plover:

According to the gren nut wackos the earth will look like it did in that stupid movie WATERWORLD with KEVIN KOSNER swimming around looking like a complete dork WHAT A BUNCH OF TWITS

Posted by Spurwing... (Below threshold)
Posted by Spurwing Plover | December 27, 2007 3:49 PM

Yes, and we know how good that movie was...

Speaking as one who lives o... (Below threshold)
Mycroft:

Speaking as one who lives on semi high ground in FL, I'll believe it when the waves come lapping at my door.

In the meantime, 1998 marked the high water point and temps have been dropping ever since. So to the author of the original piece, go peddle your papers somewhere else.

SATerpI don't s... (Below threshold)
Eric:

SATerp

I don't suppose it occurred to that moron, that, if he were correct, the conservatives would move to the blue states, taking them over?

Actually, it did occur to him. And that is the scariest thing of all about his diatribe. His solution is of course to deny people the right to vote.

The important thing is that we, on the higher ground both actually and figuratively, need to remember that, when they begin their historic migration from their doomed regions, we not give them the keys to the city. They certainly should be offered assistance in their time of need, but we need to keep a firm grip on our political systems, making sure that these guilty throngs who allowed the world to go to hell are gerrymandered into political impotence in their new homes.
Quick! Get this man some s... (Below threshold)

Quick! Get this man some sort of journalistic award!

Any comments Jp2, nogo, Br... (Below threshold)
Michael:

Any comments Jp2, nogo, Brian, BarneyMoron, Herman, etc...?

I didn't think so.

Eric: The ugliness ... (Below threshold)
langtry:

Eric: The ugliness of that second paragraph, and especially the part you higlighted, is really astonishing. The arrogance and tyranical glee practically drips off the page!

Any comments Jp2, nogo, ... (Below threshold)
Brian:

Any comments Jp2, nogo, Brian, BarneyMoron, Herman, etc...?

Sure, if you insist...

It's a stupid column.

Anything else?

The area that will... (Below threshold)
LaMedusa:
The area that will by completely inundated by the rising ocean--and not in a century but in the lifetime of my two cats--are the American southeast, including the most populated area of Texas, almost all of Florida, most of Louisiana, and half of Alabama and Mississippi, as well as goodly portions of eastern Georgia, South Carolina and North Carolina.

Not only does he make this "scientific" assessment without any sources, he's pronounced the event as a "biblical deluge" that suggests a cleansing of his imagined enemy. I'd say Clown College is missing a star pupil. This is just as bad as those that said Hurricane Katrina was an act of God against liberals. Another extremist shooting for that Nobel "piece" Prize.

Well given all your idiotic... (Below threshold)
Michael:

Well given all your idiotic blithering in the past, I was curious how you felt about...that all.

Falze - "Quick! Get thi... (Below threshold)
marc:

Falze - "Quick! Get this man some sort of journalistic award!"

Too late! According to his bio he's already an "award-winning journalist," and a "two-time Journalism Fulbright Scholar."

And how shocking (in a Capt. Renault sense) is the co-author of The Case for Impeachment

The operative term in the f... (Below threshold)
Mac Lorry:

The operative term in the first sentence of Kim's piece is "leftist nut". At the heart of the global warming movement, for lack of a better term, are the goals of redistribution of wealth, destroying the preeminence of the U.S., and bringing about an environmental utopia. Lindorff is angry that conservatives are not falling for the IPCC's junk science, which would go a long way in bring about the global warming movement's goals. His piece is just sour grapes.

Once it's obvious that we have entered the cooling phase of the climate oscillation, the likes of Lindorff and Gore will simply form the global cooling movement with the same goals as the global warming movement. The goals don't change, just the vehicle to bring them to fruition.

"Actually, it did occur to ... (Below threshold)
John S:

"Actually, it did occur to him. And that is the scariest thing of all about his diatribe. His solution is of course to deny people the right to vote."

Someone tell this stupid shit that we citizens of the "red states" still have our guns. :)

So this blithering idiot thinks 20% of the United States will be underwater in 20 years. Too bad for him the earth has been on a slight cooling trend since 1997. (Have you noticed they now call it "Climate Change" and not "Global Warming.) And the Greenland icecap actually has beem increasing in size since 2003. The amount of heat needed to melt the polar caps in 20 years also would boil the oceans dry. So I doubt Florida will be underwater anytime soon.

If the entire northern icec... (Below threshold)
David:

If the entire northern icecap melted sea level wouldn't change. it is already taken into account as it floats. And yes, today's yearly averaged temperature is lower today than it was 10 years ago.

It has been asked here before (by others and myself), exactly what is the "ideal" average yearly temperature?

The Red staters can depopul... (Below threshold)
Scrapiron:

The Red staters can depopulate the earth of Blue stater simply by witholding all food supplies that 'we grow'. Starvation would set in next week. Most of them have the mentality of the lady in NYC a few years ago that replied when ask what the government should do for the dairy farmers, "I don't care what happens to the dairy farmers, I get my milk at the grocery store". They can always masturbate the dog to feed the cat.

As usual, an idiot liberal ... (Below threshold)
stan25 Author Profile Page:

As usual, an idiot liberal eastern city dweller that does not have a clue as to the way most of us live here in the west and mid west. The Eastern liberal establishment has declared war on the West and will do anything to denigrate the way we live out here. They couldn't shut down the agriculture or mining by passing asinine regulations, so they came up with the idiot theory of Global Warming. Well that dog is not gonna hunt either.

The Red staters ca... (Below threshold)
Eric:
The Red staters can depopulate the earth of Blue stater simply by witholding all food supplies that 'we grow'. Starvation would set in next week.

Red States, Blue States, Soylent Green States.

LOL Scrapiron, great commen... (Below threshold)

LOL Scrapiron, great comment.

No more Bud Light served to the likes of Jim Lampley!!

Recently someone claimed th... (Below threshold)
SPQR:

Recently someone claimed that Al Gore's exaggerations and misrepresentations in his film were not harmful. But this silly piece shows that there are people who are unfortunately believing Al Gore's ludicrous exaggerations of the AGW argument.

It is somewhat reminiscent ... (Below threshold)
DaveH:

It is somewhat reminiscent of the California/earthquake/liberal association. The only difference is that this guy seems serious!

The scariest thing about th... (Below threshold)

The scariest thing about the article is that it is highly likely it is not satire.

That would make the author one nasty person who makes fundamentalist zealotry seem benign in comparison.

This is probably some dummy... (Below threshold)
Baggi:

This is probably some dummy who thinks that people actually care about what he has to say. So in his mind, he's saying it because he thinks, "They'll get scared, real scared, and then they'll support Global Warming initiatives to save their own arse!"

This person is probably as delusional as the rest of the libs out there who think they are influential and clever.

Forgive me please, but I fa... (Below threshold)

Forgive me please, but I fail to see how putting vast stretches of the continent under water will result in the rest of it turning to desert. Doesn't more surface area mean more evaporated water which means more water in the atmosphere? Maybe it won't all fall in the same areas as present but it's going to fall *somewhere*

I also do not see any reason at all to think that refugees from the flooded South East or coastal Texas will head to blue states. No one is that stupid. In the situation this idiot imagines cities will be nearly unlivable and only a complete moron would head toward one.

Wow what a stupid article..... (Below threshold)
North Country:

Wow what a stupid article....and I'm a global warming believer!

Anyone who spends time outdoors in the north country can see the changes with his own two eyes and doesn't need Al Gore to tell him or her things are very different.

We are all in this together, this whole liberal vs conservative thing means nothing to the climate.

I wish both sides of the isle would learn the difference between weather and climate, it might make the changes were are witnesing easier to understand.

PS.
Where is this idea that the earth is now cooling coming from? I would really like to see a link to a peer reviewed scientific study showing this trend.

Oh, who joked about Water W... (Below threshold)

Oh, who joked about Water World?

If the whole South East got covered with shallow sea water it would likely be an extremely rich environment for life... like the Caribbean on steroids or the Louisiana Bayous. People can live in those environments with a little adaptation. People already live on houseboats and put their houses on stilts.

I think the author gloats about desperate refugees far too soon.

Whilst you are over there a... (Below threshold)
waveman:

Whilst you are over there at the Baltimore Chronicle and Sentinel, poke around for a few minutes if you can stand it. This sort of bilge is not the exception, it's the rule. A leftist's wet dream!

How someone can stand to go through life with such an outlook escapes me. I'd kill myself first.

"...but we need to keep ... (Below threshold)

"...but we need to keep a firm grip on our political systems, making sure that these guilty throngs who allowed the world to go to hell are gerrymandered into political impotence in their new homes."

So, what is he suggesting? That in his little fantasy scenario each suspected conservative "refugee" be interviewed, deemed guilty of thought crimes, have their rights stripped of them?

That's what always kills me about these kooks. They're quick to sling out the fascist labels and then suggest something so, well, fascist.

I thought - Okay, so they have one kook on staff. What paper doesn't? Then I read the left column of news sections:

Local News & Opinion
Health & Environment
US News Media
US Politics, Policy & Culture
US "High Crimes" & Incompetence

"Where is the idea that the... (Below threshold)
LaMedusa:

"Where is the idea that the earth is now cooling from?"

From the U.S. National Climate Data Center.
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-news/1658580/posts

<a href="http://acuf.org/is... (Below threshold)
LaMedusa:

Here is another link to the info in case the Free Republic site is down.

"Bob Carter, a paleoclimatologist from Australia, notes that the earth also had strong global warming between 1918 and 1940. Then there was a long cooling period from 1940 to 1965. He points out that the current warming started 50 years before cars and industries began spewing consequential amounts of CO2. Then the planet cooled for 35 years just after the CO2 levels really began to surge. In fact, says Carter, there doesn't seem to be much correlation between temperatures and man-made CO2."

Meanwhile... all you gals/w... (Below threshold)
marc:

Meanwhile... all you gals/woman who ogle that HOT guy driving the HOT car (like a Ferrari) STOP it!

You're killing the planet.

"we can't have these future... (Below threshold)

"we can't have these future refugee troglodytes, should their personal disasters still fail to make them recognize reality, mucking things up again."

Sounds just like the liberals who tire of the mess their liberal policies have created and move to red states - only to start the cycle of liberal destruction all over again. Shall we take his advice?




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