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Wizbang Weekend Caption Contest™

Posted by Kevin
Published: January 11, 2008 - 7:00 AM

It's Friday, which means it's time for the Wizbang Weekend Caption Contest™. Enter your best caption for the following picture:


Attendees look at a Fiat, right, and Ford Cobra, left, at the Microsoft Auto exhibit at the Consumer Electronics Show (CES) in Las Vegas, Monday, Jan. 7, 2008. (AP Photo/Paul Sakuma)


Winners will be announced Monday morning.


Update: Winners annouced. Click the link to read the winning entries. The contest is now closed, but a new edition will debut Friday morning.

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Comments (105)

"You have performed an ille... (Below threshold)

1. Posted by Steve L. | January 11, 2008 7:38 AM | Score: 2 (2 votes cast)
Steve L.:

"You have performed an illegal operation. CLick OK to reboot. What the...?!?!?!?!"

1. Posted by Steve L. | January 11, 2008 7:38 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 2 (2 votes cast)

Posted on January 11, 2008 07:38

"...and great mileage, you ... (Below threshold)

2. Posted by rodney dill | January 11, 2008 7:38 AM | Score: 3 (3 votes cast)
rodney dill:

"...and great mileage, you just have to shut it off and restart it every 10 miles."

2. Posted by rodney dill | January 11, 2008 7:38 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 3 (3 votes cast)

Posted on January 11, 2008 07:38

Needs twice as much engine,... (Below threshold)

3. Posted by JLawson | January 11, 2008 7:38 AM | Score: 2 (2 votes cast)
JLawson:

Needs twice as much engine, sucks twice as much gas, and crashes every five minutes. What's not to love?

3. Posted by JLawson | January 11, 2008 7:38 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 2 (2 votes cast)

Posted on January 11, 2008 07:38

Everytime you step on the g... (Below threshold)

4. Posted by rodney dill | January 11, 2008 7:42 AM | Score: 10 (10 votes cast)
rodney dill:

Everytime you step on the gas it asks you if you're sure you really want to go faster.

4. Posted by rodney dill | January 11, 2008 7:42 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 10 (10 votes cast)

Posted on January 11, 2008 07:42

After you purchase the chas... (Below threshold)

5. Posted by rodney dill | January 11, 2008 7:43 AM | Score: 7 (7 votes cast)
rodney dill:

After you purchase the chassis and engine upgrades you'll be all set.

5. Posted by rodney dill | January 11, 2008 7:43 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 7 (7 votes cast)

Posted on January 11, 2008 07:43

Gates: "I don't know why ev... (Below threshold)

6. Posted by rodney dill | January 11, 2008 7:45 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
rodney dill:

Gates: "I don't know why everyone keeps looking at that red Apple offering."

6. Posted by rodney dill | January 11, 2008 7:45 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on January 11, 2008 07:45

"Well here's your upgrade p... (Below threshold)

7. Posted by rodney dill | January 11, 2008 7:47 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
rodney dill:

"Well here's your upgrade problem... you didn't realize you still need that 3 and 1/2 inch floppy drive to get it reset the first time."

7. Posted by rodney dill | January 11, 2008 7:47 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on January 11, 2008 07:47

Setting a new record for qu... (Below threshold)

8. Posted by SilentStorm | January 11, 2008 7:48 AM | Score: 7 (7 votes cast)
SilentStorm:

Setting a new record for quickest unacceptable rating on Consumer Reports for crashworthyness, we present to you the Microsoft Bug.

8. Posted by SilentStorm | January 11, 2008 7:48 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 7 (7 votes cast)

Posted on January 11, 2008 07:48

For use with Microsoft Road... (Below threshold)

9. Posted by the brain | January 11, 2008 7:53 AM | Score: 3 (5 votes cast)
the brain:

For use with Microsoft Roads(TM) coming soon to a area near you!

9. Posted by the brain | January 11, 2008 7:53 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 3 (5 votes cast)

Posted on January 11, 2008 07:53

Where do you want to crash ... (Below threshold)

10. Posted by fustian | January 11, 2008 7:58 AM | Score: 4 (4 votes cast)
fustian:

Where do you want to crash today?

10. Posted by fustian | January 11, 2008 7:58 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 4 (4 votes cast)

Posted on January 11, 2008 07:58

Just make sure you start it... (Below threshold)

11. Posted by rodney dill | January 11, 2008 7:59 AM | Score: 1 (1 votes cast)
rodney dill:

Just make sure you start it up 15 minutes before you really want to use it.

11. Posted by rodney dill | January 11, 2008 7:59 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 1 (1 votes cast)

Posted on January 11, 2008 07:59

To start the car, you simpl... (Below threshold)

12. Posted by fustian | January 11, 2008 8:02 AM | Score: 14 (14 votes cast)
fustian:

To start the car, you simply press the brake, pull on the door handle, and open the glove box simultaneously. Then type in your password and off you go.

12. Posted by fustian | January 11, 2008 8:02 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 14 (14 votes cast)

Posted on January 11, 2008 08:02

Steering with the mouse is ... (Below threshold)

13. Posted by fustian | January 11, 2008 8:05 AM | Score: 4 (4 votes cast)
fustian:

Steering with the mouse is more efficient and many people don't miss the steering wheel after just a few months.

13. Posted by fustian | January 11, 2008 8:05 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 4 (4 votes cast)

Posted on January 11, 2008 08:05

That's great, but the new i... (Below threshold)

14. Posted by fustian | January 11, 2008 8:06 AM | Score: 3 (3 votes cast)
fustian:

That's great, but the new iCar flies!...

14. Posted by fustian | January 11, 2008 8:06 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 3 (3 votes cast)

Posted on January 11, 2008 08:06

dah dah dah dah... (Below threshold)

15. Posted by Pretzel_Logic | January 11, 2008 8:09 AM | Score: -5 (5 votes cast)
Pretzel_Logic:

dah dah dah dah

15. Posted by Pretzel_Logic | January 11, 2008 8:09 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: -5 (5 votes cast)

Posted on January 11, 2008 08:09

Pull My Finger.... (Below threshold)

16. Posted by Pretzel_Logic | January 11, 2008 8:09 AM | Score: -5 (5 votes cast)
Pretzel_Logic:

Pull My Finger.

16. Posted by Pretzel_Logic | January 11, 2008 8:09 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: -5 (5 votes cast)

Posted on January 11, 2008 08:09

For obvious PR reasons, Mic... (Below threshold)

17. Posted by fustian | January 11, 2008 8:10 AM | Score: 6 (6 votes cast)
fustian:

For obvious PR reasons, Microsoft is replacing the word "crash" with "in a pre-reboot state"...

17. Posted by fustian | January 11, 2008 8:10 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 6 (6 votes cast)

Posted on January 11, 2008 08:10

Microsoft is hoping to cash... (Below threshold)

18. Posted by fustian | January 11, 2008 8:13 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
fustian:

Microsoft is hoping to cash in on some of that traffic ticket revenue. If you don't pay your monthly speeding surcharge, Microsoft's digital rights management will revoke your license.

18. Posted by fustian | January 11, 2008 8:13 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on January 11, 2008 08:13

Are you just going to get t... (Below threshold)

19. Posted by fustian | January 11, 2008 8:16 AM | Score: 3 (3 votes cast)
fustian:

Are you just going to get the Surface Street Edition, or are you going to pop for the full Freeway and Toll Road Edition?

19. Posted by fustian | January 11, 2008 8:16 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 3 (3 votes cast)

Posted on January 11, 2008 08:16

More extensive crash testin... (Below threshold)

20. Posted by rodney dill | January 11, 2008 8:17 AM | Score: 3 (3 votes cast)
rodney dill:

More extensive crash testing than any other American model.

20. Posted by rodney dill | January 11, 2008 8:17 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 3 (3 votes cast)

Posted on January 11, 2008 08:17

Unfortunately, it only take... (Below threshold)

21. Posted by fustian | January 11, 2008 8:18 AM | Score: 1 (1 votes cast)
fustian:

Unfortunately, it only takes proprietary Microsoft gas from new stations being built by Dell, HP and Radio Shack.

21. Posted by fustian | January 11, 2008 8:18 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 1 (1 votes cast)

Posted on January 11, 2008 08:18

And I thought I had driver ... (Below threshold)

22. Posted by fustian | January 11, 2008 8:21 AM | Score: 3 (3 votes cast)
fustian:

And I thought I had driver trouble with Vista now...

22. Posted by fustian | January 11, 2008 8:21 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 3 (3 votes cast)

Posted on January 11, 2008 08:21

No it wasn't designed with ... (Below threshold)

23. Posted by rodney dill | January 11, 2008 8:21 AM | Score: 4 (4 votes cast)
rodney dill:

No it wasn't designed with any door locks, you just need the Trunk Monkey patch as a security workaround.

23. Posted by rodney dill | January 11, 2008 8:21 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 4 (4 votes cast)

Posted on January 11, 2008 08:21

You know Microsoft is going... (Below threshold)

24. Posted by fustian | January 11, 2008 8:22 AM | Score: 3 (3 votes cast)
fustian:

You know Microsoft is going to blame all crashes on bad drivers...

24. Posted by fustian | January 11, 2008 8:22 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 3 (3 votes cast)

Posted on January 11, 2008 08:22

ZuneBuggy... (Below threshold)

25. Posted by Usful Ijit | January 11, 2008 8:23 AM | Score: 6 (6 votes cast)
Usful Ijit:

ZuneBuggy

25. Posted by Usful Ijit | January 11, 2008 8:23 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 6 (6 votes cast)

Posted on January 11, 2008 08:23

These cars turn Blue right ... (Below threshold)

26. Posted by Imhotep | January 11, 2008 8:23 AM | Score: 1 (1 votes cast)
Imhotep:

These cars turn Blue right during or after they crash.

26. Posted by Imhotep | January 11, 2008 8:23 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 1 (1 votes cast)

Posted on January 11, 2008 08:23

Rejected slogan: "It's the ... (Below threshold)

27. Posted by fustian | January 11, 2008 8:24 AM | Score: -1 (1 votes cast)
fustian:

Rejected slogan: "It's the Zune of automobiles!".

27. Posted by fustian | January 11, 2008 8:24 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: -1 (1 votes cast)

Posted on January 11, 2008 08:24

Microsoft Auto - savaged by... (Below threshold)

28. Posted by Baron Von Ottomatic | January 11, 2008 8:30 AM | Score: -1 (1 votes cast)
Baron Von Ottomatic:

Microsoft Auto - savaged by nerds, used without issues by 99% of Americans.

28. Posted by Baron Von Ottomatic | January 11, 2008 8:30 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: -1 (1 votes cast)

Posted on January 11, 2008 08:30

Executives from 'Fix... (Below threshold)

29. Posted by Clancy | January 11, 2008 8:30 AM | Score: 2 (2 votes cast)
Clancy:

Executives from 'Fix It Again Tony' and 'Fix Or Repair Daily' work with microsoft to help improve microsoft's product quality...

29. Posted by Clancy | January 11, 2008 8:30 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 2 (2 votes cast)

Posted on January 11, 2008 08:30

A real car expert knows you... (Below threshold)

30. Posted by Baron Von Ottomatic | January 11, 2008 8:32 AM | Score: 1 (1 votes cast)
Baron Von Ottomatic:

A real car expert knows you should always boot the tires before you buy.

30. Posted by Baron Von Ottomatic | January 11, 2008 8:32 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 1 (1 votes cast)

Posted on January 11, 2008 08:32

Muscle Car vs. Mussel Car</... (Below threshold)

31. Posted by Jeff Blogworthy | January 11, 2008 8:33 AM | Score: 1 (1 votes cast)
Jeff Blogworthy:

Muscle Car vs. Mussel Car

31. Posted by Jeff Blogworthy | January 11, 2008 8:33 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 1 (1 votes cast)

Posted on January 11, 2008 08:33

A chaffeur, Microsoft Bob, ... (Below threshold)

32. Posted by Ivo Vegter | January 11, 2008 8:36 AM | Score: 1 (1 votes cast)
Ivo Vegter:

A chaffeur, Microsoft Bob, comes bundled for free.

32. Posted by Ivo Vegter | January 11, 2008 8:36 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 1 (1 votes cast)

Posted on January 11, 2008 08:36

Bill Gates would drive one ... (Below threshold)

33. Posted by Ivo Vegter | January 11, 2008 8:38 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Ivo Vegter:

Bill Gates would drive one of these. But then, he also plays with Chewbacca dolls.

33. Posted by Ivo Vegter | January 11, 2008 8:38 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on January 11, 2008 08:38

Look closely and you'll see... (Below threshold)

34. Posted by Baron Von Ottomatic | January 11, 2008 8:40 AM | Score: 0 (4 votes cast)
Baron Von Ottomatic:

Look closely and you'll see that smug, pretentious Mac prick from the TV commercials pinned under the new Microsoft Auto.

34. Posted by Baron Von Ottomatic | January 11, 2008 8:40 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (4 votes cast)

Posted on January 11, 2008 08:40

Firewall? What's a firewall... (Below threshold)

35. Posted by Ivo Vegter | January 11, 2008 8:40 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Ivo Vegter:

Firewall? What's a firewall?

35. Posted by Ivo Vegter | January 11, 2008 8:40 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on January 11, 2008 08:40

No, honey, I swear. I WAS ... (Below threshold)

36. Posted by guido | January 11, 2008 8:41 AM | Score: 8 (8 votes cast)
guido:

No, honey, I swear. I WAS on my way straight home to you, sweetie pie, but THEN a hacker redirected the car to that strip joint. So, really it's your fault, hunnybunch, 'cause I wanted to get the iCar, but NOOOOOO!, you just had to have MS Vistamobile.

36. Posted by guido | January 11, 2008 8:41 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 8 (8 votes cast)

Posted on January 11, 2008 08:41

Just be sure you have your ... (Below threshold)

37. Posted by Thunder Pig | January 11, 2008 8:48 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Thunder Pig:

Just be sure you have your authentication numbers handy when you call customer support.

37. Posted by Thunder Pig | January 11, 2008 8:48 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on January 11, 2008 08:48

The first Microsoft Auto-VI... (Below threshold)

38. Posted by fustian | January 11, 2008 8:50 AM | Score: 2 (2 votes cast)
fustian:

The first Microsoft Auto-VIrus has been announced. I pops your hood whenever the car goes faster than 70 mph...

38. Posted by fustian | January 11, 2008 8:50 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 2 (2 votes cast)

Posted on January 11, 2008 08:50

Until now, fiats by Microso... (Below threshold)

39. Posted by Baron Von Ottomatic | January 11, 2008 8:51 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Baron Von Ottomatic:

Until now, fiats by Microsoft involved security patches and rebooting.

39. Posted by Baron Von Ottomatic | January 11, 2008 8:51 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on January 11, 2008 08:51

Microsoft Auto started off ... (Below threshold)

40. Posted by guido | January 11, 2008 8:51 AM | Score: 1 (1 votes cast)
guido:

Microsoft Auto started off as a great success, but when Federal mileage regulations required that they get 9 bits to the byte, Microsoft executives secretly began selling off their stock options.

40. Posted by guido | January 11, 2008 8:51 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 1 (1 votes cast)

Posted on January 11, 2008 08:51