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Wizbang Weekend Caption Contest™

It's Friday, which means it's time for the Wizbang Weekend Caption Contest™. Enter your best caption for the following picture:


Obama also met with Berlin's mayor Klaus Wowereit, who presented him a porcelain bear, the city's symbol.


Winners will be announced Monday morning.


Update: Winners announced. Click the link to read the winning entries. The contest is now closed.


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Comments (130)

Obama: "I too am a jelly do... (Below threshold)

Obama: "I too am a jelly donut."

"Yes. Yes I do like the lit... (Below threshold)
WildWillie:

"Yes. Yes I do like the little bear you made, but no, I will not kiss your bear." ww

Well, there goes any shot a... (Below threshold)
Hamish:

Well, there goes any shot at the Colbert Report endorsement...

In a stunning scientific de... (Below threshold)
Hamish:

In a stunning scientific development, Barack Obama reveals how polar bears are adapting, even faster than Darwin could have predicted, to the shrinking polar ice caps brought about by global warmening.

Klaus: "Well you're the one... (Below threshold)

Klaus: "Well you're the one that said, 'Ich bin ein, beartrainer.'"

Aw man...you got a statue?<... (Below threshold)
SilentStorm:

Aw man...you got a statue?

I did my part for global warming and all I got was a lousy t-shirt!

This full grown Polar Bear ... (Below threshold)

This full grown Polar Bear is the result of global warming.

Some days the bear gets you... (Below threshold)

Some days the bear gets you ... some days you get the bear.

"and if you turn this littl... (Below threshold)
lisapope:

"and if you turn this little key in the back, he sings Barrack the Magic Negro..."

"Oh, those letters just sta... (Below threshold)

"Oh, those letters just stand for Klaus's Kodiak Klub."

Klaus: "Vhat do you mean by... (Below threshold)

Klaus: "Vhat do you mean by zees, 'Candygram for Mongo.'"

Barrack was delighted to re... (Below threshold)
Baron Von Ottomatic:

Barrack was delighted to reveal that the Senate Polar Bear Committee, of which he is a member or chairman or something, had approved a strongly worded proclamation favoring polar bears.

Obamessiah knows all too we... (Below threshold)
Baron Von Ottomatic:

Obamessiah knows all too well the consecrated cross-eyed bear...

Why this will look great ne... (Below threshold)
Baron Von Ottomatic:

Why this will look great next to the white flags I was given by Maliki and Petraeus.

Obviously another racist mo... (Below threshold)
Jumpinjoe:

Obviously another racist moment where the white polar bear, an enduring symbol of a species needing saving as opposed to the black nuisance bear that needs it's population controlled from spreading to the suburbs was presented to a black man knowing full well the true symbolism. Vote Obama and stop the racism.

Now is the time on Sprocket... (Below threshold)

Now is the time on Sprockets vhen ve dance!

THis is the a statue of tha... (Below threshold)
lisapope:

THis is the a statue of that Cracker Bear that met me in the woods that night. He told me I was the O'messiah and would become the first world citizen and annointed King of all the World.

Obama reciprocated with the... (Below threshold)
Baron Von Ottomatic:

Obama reciprocated with the two symbols of his campaign - an empty suit and a teleprompter.

Ich bin ein Sitzpinkler!</p... (Below threshold)
Baron Von Ottomatic:

Ich bin ein Sitzpinkler!

It's called a "Baracky Bear... (Below threshold)

It's called a "Baracky Bear". It's like a teddy bear, except it's environmental, or something.

White on the outside, empty... (Below threshold)

White on the outside, empty in the middle. It's my campaign!

"Uhhh...I like it, but ummm... (Below threshold)

"Uhhh...I like it, but ummmmmmmm...do you have one in uhhhh, mocha?"

"Mr Mayor, you want me to p... (Below threshold)
retired military:

"Mr Mayor, you want me to put this in my church? Well aside from it being the wrong color it isn't my church anymore."

It too is hollow on the ins... (Below threshold)
Baron Von Ottomatic:

It too is hollow on the inside; how do you say - empty - just like you. Ja?

"and you see Mr Obama, pres... (Below threshold)
retired military:

"and you see Mr Obama, press this lever here and he raises his paw in a Heil Obama salute."

Obama - "Why did the bear h... (Below threshold)
retired military:

Obama - "Why did the bear have to be white?"

And, when you get it back h... (Below threshold)

And, when you get it back home, break it open with a hammer. There's just under ten million marks to help you overlook a few German weapons systems the terrorists used to kill American soldiers.

Oopsie!

Obama - "The polar bear is ... (Below threshold)
retired military:

Obama - "The polar bear is a symbol of America's blatant racism. You notice that it is on the endangered species list and is protected by numerous laws. The black bear isn't on the endangered species list. In fact, the US even has black bear hunting season. That is why the German people should support me for President. To end this blatant racism."

Obama: Why is he giving me ... (Below threshold)
Jeff Blogworthy:

Obama: Why is he giving me a white bear?

"Oh...a gift...ha ha......h... (Below threshold)

"Oh...a gift...ha ha......ha....................ummmm...thanks..."

"Dear Lord in Heaven, pleas... (Below threshold)

"Dear Lord in Heaven, please let there be a receipt..."

Das German version of the "... (Below threshold)
Imhotep:

Das German version of the "Jackrabbit"....Michelle will LOVE it!

"Thanks so much, I have a p... (Below threshold)

"Thanks so much, I have a perfect spot for it when I get back to the Oval Office."

Zee, you put ein finger on ... (Below threshold)
Red Five:

Zee, you put ein finger on zee button und push it, und a little hologram appears und says, "Help me, Barack Hussein Obama, you're our only hope!"

"Thanks so much...small asi... (Below threshold)

"Thanks so much...small aside, my uncle's, brother's, cousin's, sister's, mom's, daughter's, dad, on my mother's side of the family, was there when the first polar bear was born in captivity. True story."

"And this slot here is wher... (Below threshold)
jim2:

"And this slot here is where you can put all that change you've been bloviating about."

"Uhhhhhhhhhh"... (Below threshold)
Faith+1:

"Uhhhhhhhhhh"

Mayor - "A great white bear... (Below threshold)
retired military:

Mayor - "A great white bear for the great white hype. umm I mean hope."

Narrowly avoiding an intern... (Below threshold)
Faith+1:

Narrowly avoiding an international incident Obama's crack staff had carved "Say 'Thanks!'" on the base of the statue so Obama would know what to say.

Mayor - "And Mr Obama this ... (Below threshold)
retired military:

Mayor - "And Mr Obama this is a token of our appreciation for what your democratic congress has done to the US economy. Once you are elected Germany looks forward to moving ahead of you in the world markets"

Eet iss a, how you say, fac... (Below threshold)
Weegie:

Eet iss a, how you say, facsimile of a bear, yust like you a facsimile of a president, ja?

Ja, und zince dere are nein... (Below threshold)
epador:

Ja, und zince dere are nein trees in die Arctic, zis is vere de polar bear poops.

Obama - "I will be sure to ... (Below threshold)
retired military:

Obama - "I will be sure to not let my wife see this. She may say something embarrasing if she does and I will have to throw her under the bus too."

Mayor - "Well if you spray ... (Below threshold)
retired military:

Mayor - "Well if you spray paint it black your wife may like it more. Then it will be more like you. Black on the outside and white on the inside"

"Oh, yes it's a fine... (Below threshold)

"Oh, yes it's a fine bear statue. I'm sure the bowl of soup it came with was top notch."

"Yo, blood, this a White be... (Below threshold)

"Yo, blood, this a White bear, man!"

The bear appears to be blin... (Below threshold)
SILVER BULLET:

The bear appears to be blind and feeling his way, just like Obama hopes the voters will be in November.

Mayor Wowereit: "It is ein... (Below threshold)
Joel:

Mayor Wowereit: "It is ein polar bear, threatened with extinction and a symbol of zee commitment both of us made to fight global warming."

Senator Obama: "No duh, Klaus. I've seen An Inconvenient Truth; watch CNN too."

Mayor Wowereit: "...and if... (Below threshold)
Joel:

Mayor Wowereit: "...and if you push zis hidden button right undernease here, you'll be able to access zee $100,000 euros needed to defeat zee McChimpyHaliBush in November."

"I knew Jack Kennedy. I wa... (Below threshold)
Joel:

"I knew Jack Kennedy. I was good friends with Jack Kennedy, and you, Senator, are a jelly doughnut."

Barack is presented the Ger... (Below threshold)
gil:

Barack is presented the German version of a white elephant.

"Using this switch, the bea... (Below threshold)
Joel:

"Using this switch, the bear can say 'Yes we can' in English, Spanish and German. However, we're not aware of an equivalent phrase in French."

Obama's reply:<blockq... (Below threshold)

Obama's reply:

Merci beaucoup!
If Obama's holding it you c... (Below threshold)
Baron Von Ottomatic:

If Obama's holding it you can be certain it's not a Hubble Humble figurine

'This is a scale model whic... (Below threshold)
hermie:

'This is a scale model which will be part of the rotunda in my Presidential Library which is now being constructed. Which coincidentally, contributions are now being accepted."

'We had considered a 'Golden Calf', but Michelle insisted on the 'Platinum Bear' instead.

Don't vorry. It vill get da... (Below threshold)
bryanD:

Don't vorry. It vill get darker. Itz meerschaum!

"This pathetic bear might a... (Below threshold)

"This pathetic bear might as well have written that dumbass speech you just gave."

"We wanted a suitable sy... (Below threshold)
DJ Drummond:

"We wanted a suitable symbol for you, Senator.

Expensive yet fragile, powerful in image if not in substance, and of course you can change its meaning while telling everyone you are being consistent."

"An expensive empty trin... (Below threshold)
DJ Drummond:

"An expensive empty trinket for an expensive empty suit!"

"I Got One In Every Room, T... (Below threshold)

"I Got One In Every Room, They are Smoke Detectors."

And here is a model of my c... (Below threshold)
kbiel Author Profile Page:

And here is a model of my civilian defense force. You see, if we use bears then people won't need guns and no one will want to invade us.

"Jessie Jackson Gave It To ... (Below threshold)

"Jessie Jackson Gave It To Me, It's A Nut Cracker."

"Yeah, I got one of these i... (Below threshold)

"Yeah, I got one of these in Mexico. Press down here, and oil comes out."

Not even a teleprompter cou... (Below threshold)
Rick13:

Not even a teleprompter could help Obama out of this one!

..vhut you see Obama, zumti... (Below threshold)
Jeff:

..vhut you see Obama, zumtimes za bear is just za bear...

It's not just the late nigh... (Below threshold)

It's not just the late night guys who are having trouble making jokes about Obie - Wizbang's top Caption Contest Contestants are equally stymied.

Obama removed the bear's ti... (Below threshold)
Al Pennam:

Obama removed the bear's tiny Coca-Cola bottle - too American.

So this is a bear. Nice. ... (Below threshold)

So this is a bear. Nice. We have bears in Illinois. I even backed legislation to see that they were afforded equal rights and fair housing while on the senate banking committee, with several representatives from the other 57 states.

Klaus: Would you like anoth... (Below threshold)
Jeff:

Klaus: Would you like another schnitzengruben?

Barack: No, thank you. Fifteen is my limit on schnitzengruben.

I understand your aides tak... (Below threshold)
jbw:

I understand your aides take foreign policy advice from Winnie the Pooh. Because I'm a grown-up this is the only bear I could find lying around.

Obama: Mr. Mayor, I think y... (Below threshold)
Jeff:

Obama: Mr. Mayor, I think you misunderstood when I said I wanted to come to Berlin and get a tiny white doll that was a bear...

"...and it's hollow inside ... (Below threshold)
Tango:

"...and it's hollow inside so you can hide your stash from the SS"

"Cool Beans you goose-steppin' Aryan"

"Give me a fist-bump my Chocolate Brother"

"...and this is my Nobel pr... (Below threshold)
GarandFan:

"...and this is my Nobel prize for lowering the seas and thus saving the polar bear..."

When the need is great, le... (Below threshold)
Al Pennam:

When the need is great, leave this by the window and the Gaia League will come to your aid!

"It's actually a bar of soa... (Below threshold)
kumquat:

"It's actually a bar of soap. When you wash your hands with it, the slow melting symbolizes the polar climate shift."

"Vee ver goink to giff y... (Below threshold)
DJ Drummond:

"Vee ver goink to giff you an eagle, but I understand you consider zat too pro-American and warlike ..."

" Did Jesse Jackson give yo... (Below threshold)
GMax:

" Did Jesse Jackson give you this bear? Cuz it looks like his testicles have been removed?"

This handy little unit is t... (Below threshold)
Lily:

This handy little unit is the Bear of Prevarication +2. With this little guy on the podium you gain the trust of all media personnel in the room and they automatically believe and broadcast your every utterance to your greatest advantage. If you speak "inartfully" you get a +2 on your save credibility roll and an automatic dump of Wikepedia and Google caches.

What you already have one of these?! That damn Gnome LIED to me. He said Bill Clinton had the only other one in existence.

This is the bear my uncle r... (Below threshold)

This is the bear my uncle received from the Soviets for helping to liberate Aushwitz.

"When Barack Obama was in t... (Below threshold)

"When Barack Obama was in the Alps,
Fighting polar bears,
He used his magical fire breath,
And saved the maidens fair.

"So what would Barack Obama do
If he were here today?
I'm sure he'd kick an ass or two,
That's what Barack Obama'd do."

"Mr. Obama, it is a nice statue, but must you sing about yourself in the third person? And the way the reporters all leaped in on the chorus... creepy."

"... and he holds the toile... (Below threshold)
rodney dill:

"... and he holds the toilet paper roll on a spindle between his paws -- in Germany we call that Forbearpoopin"

Obama: So, is that a bear i... (Below threshold)
Jeff:

Obama: So, is that a bear in your pants or are you just enjoying my speech?

A Kodiak Moment... (Below threshold)

A Kodiak Moment

Mayor: Is it true how zey s... (Below threshold)
Jeff:

Mayor: Is it true how zey say zat you people are... gifted?
[Lights go out, sound of zipper opening]
Mayor: Oh. It's twue. It's twue. It's twue, it's twue!

So Senator Obama, let me ge... (Below threshold)

So Senator Obama, let me get this straight: This is all that's left of the polar ice caps. Here in your office. At room temperature. Holding down your stacks of ACORN registration forms...

Hey, this bear is white! Th... (Below threshold)

Hey, this bear is white! That's racist!

Obama: "Bear with me for a ... (Below threshold)
_Mike_:

Obama: "Bear with me for a moment.. the teleprompter's down so I don't know my response".

Wow, you mean to say you sp... (Below threshold)

Wow, you mean to say you spent years sculpting this thing from nothing but bull excrement and hot air, then whitewashed it to make it look like something of substance? OK, but what about the bear statue?


I'm only showing you this t... (Below threshold)

I'm only showing you this to distract you from the fact that my name backwards is "I... I am a BOKC Arab."

I was given this by the Sie... (Below threshold)

I was given this by the Sierra Club for preserving the home of the Polar Bear. It's made from the boiled down cartilage of 1255 polar bears.

... and now ve vish to pres... (Below threshold)
RadiCalMan:

... and now ve vish to present Mr. Barack Hussein Obama mit the European Union's "Most Bearish on America" award for 2008!

Think this bear will fit un... (Below threshold)

Think this bear will fit under that bus?

This one has a "meadow fres... (Below threshold)
iurockhead:

This one has a "meadow fresh" cartrige, but you can refill it with the scent of your choice. I recommend one in every room. And each bathroom.

Mayor: The first rule of Be... (Below threshold)
Jeff:

Mayor: The first rule of Bear Club is - you do not talk about Bear Club. The second rule of Bear Club is - you DO NOT talk about Bear Club

Another Obama photo-op: unB... (Below threshold)
Norm:

Another Obama photo-op: unBEARable.

"The Bear Is Made Out Of Re... (Below threshold)

"The Bear Is Made Out Of Recycled Beer Foam."

"The Bear Comes In Limburge... (Below threshold)

"The Bear Comes In Limburger Or A Sassy German Brie."

"Putin Left It In The Batht... (Below threshold)

"Putin Left It In The Bathtub, It Floats."

Senator Obama holds a symbo... (Below threshold)
Dodo David:

Senator Obama holds a symbol of what the stock market will be like if he becomes President.

If you don't know what a be... (Below threshold)
Dodo David:

If you don't know what a bear market is, then you will if Obama becomes President.

Obama: "I call him Whitey, ... (Below threshold)
JV:

Obama: "I call him Whitey, after my grandma."

Obama Unveils Veep: "Kung F... (Below threshold)
JV:

Obama Unveils Veep: "Kung Fu Polar Bear"

"Push a button and it measu... (Below threshold)
JV:

"Push a button and it measures your ear? Ingenious!"

"You're right, Obama. He is... (Below threshold)
JV:

"You're right, Obama. He is citizen of the world, too!"

OBAMA'S SENSE OF SECURITY: ... (Below threshold)
JV:

OBAMA'S SENSE OF SECURITY: "You really sleep with him every night?"

Oh, look it's a BOY bear. ... (Below threshold)
itismedavid:

Oh, look it's a BOY bear. Barry, have you ever seen a grown man naked?

Obama's Views on Ecology an... (Below threshold)
JV:

Obama's Views on Ecology and Sovereignty: Knut and Neutered

"You really ripped that off... (Below threshold)
JV:

"You really ripped that off a Freezee machine? You criminal you!"

Polar Bear and Poller Bar'<... (Below threshold)
JV:

Polar Bear and Poller Bar'

"You know, he is viter than... (Below threshold)
JV:

"You know, he is viter than you but not as vite as me."

"Here's a little statue sig... (Below threshold)
P. Bunyan:

"Here's a little statue signifying what the world's stock markets will be like during your Presidency."

Uh, I, would uh, like to th... (Below threshold)
Willy:

Uh, I, would uh, like to thank, uh, you for this uh, wonderful bear. It, uh, represents to me, uh, strength and ...your thoughtfulness, uh, means much to, uh me. Uh, Uh.

Comments by B. uh, Obama

Answer: One is a polar bear... (Below threshold)

Answer: One is a polar bear and the other is a sub-par bowler.

If there's any justice at t... (Below threshold)

If there's any justice at this site, number 54 will be the winner.

I feel like such an idiot: ... (Below threshold)

I feel like such an idiot: I kept repeating "this is the moment" when what I meant to say was "this is the small polar bear statue."

Ick! Ben, ein Bear (linner)... (Below threshold)

Ick! Ben, ein Bear (linner).

'Yes and we call the bear, ... (Below threshold)
rodney dill:

'Yes and we call the bear, Boo-Boo.'

"This is your award for the... (Below threshold)

"This is your award for the most gratuitous of the word 'Belgium' ".

"Well, actually Ralphie's f... (Below threshold)

"Well, actually Ralphie's father got the Major award, but this one should do for you."

"Oh my gosh you shouldn't h... (Below threshold)

"Oh my gosh you shouldn't have. No seriously. You really, really shouldn't have."

"Wow. This will be a famil... (Below threshold)

"Wow. This will be a family wedding gag gift for decades."

Rodney (#120):LOL!... (Below threshold)

Rodney (#120):

LOL!!!! Damn hell, you say you won that?!

"A little white bear? Don'... (Below threshold)

"A little white bear? Don't you know who I am? I'm the ObamaMessiah, bitch!

Mr. Obama, you are now the ... (Below threshold)

Mr. Obama, you are now the proud owner of the Bear Market Voodoo Doll. If you want to become President of the US, you know what to do.

Would you skip visiting wou... (Below threshold)
Lori:

Would you skip visiting wounded soldiers for a Klondike Bar?

Congratulations -- For wear... (Below threshold)
ijosha:

Congratulations -- For wearing a lapel pin today, you get a prize!

Thank you. My grandmother ... (Below threshold)
john1v6:

Thank you. My grandmother used to have one just like it. She loved it, used to point it out and talk about it all the time. Racist b*tch

My mistake, I meant #53, "M... (Below threshold)

My mistake, I meant #53, "Merci beaucoup".

"And if you use this settin... (Below threshold)
lowmal:

"And if you use this setting, it'll make Michelle's head spin.. You're gonna need extra batteries.."

Update: <... (Below threshold)
Kevin Author Profile Page:

Update: Winners announced. Click the link to read the winning entries. The contest is now closed.




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