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Wizbang Weekend Caption Contest™

Posted by Kevin

Published: August 8, 2008 - 7:00 AM

It's Friday, which means it's time for the Wizbang Weekend Caption Contest™. Enter your best caption for the following picture:


A toilet with an Olympic sticker attached can be seen at the Olympic village in Beijing July 27, 2008. The heavily-guarded village, which will house 16,000 athletes and officials during next month's Beijing Games, was officially opened on Sunday under skies still grey with the pollution that China has promised to clear in time for the August 8-24 Games. REUTERS/David Gray (CHINA) (BEIJING OLYMPICS 2008 PREVIEW)


Winners will be announced Monday morning.

Update: Winners announced. Click the link to read the winning entries. The contest is now closed.

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Comments (102)

The men's gymnastics team l... (Below threshold)

1. Posted by WildWillie | August 8, 2008 7:19 AM | Score: 4 (4 votes cast)
WildWillie:

The men's gymnastics team lodge a complaint againt the events organizers. ww

1. Posted by WildWillie | August 8, 2008 7:19 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 4 (4 votes cast)

Posted on August 8, 2008 07:19

The new event: The enema li... (Below threshold)

2. Posted by WildWillie | August 8, 2008 7:21 AM | Score: 1 (3 votes cast)
WildWillie:

The new event: The enema lift games. ww

2. Posted by WildWillie | August 8, 2008 7:21 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 1 (3 votes cast)

Posted on August 8, 2008 07:21

Moments before the Opening ... (Below threshold)

3. Posted by Baron Von Ottomatic | August 8, 2008 7:32 AM | Score: 15 (17 votes cast)
Baron Von Ottomatic:

Moments before the Opening Ceremonies, China revealed its monument to human rights.

3. Posted by Baron Von Ottomatic | August 8, 2008 7:32 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 15 (17 votes cast)

Posted on August 8, 2008 07:32

Astronomy Picture of The Da... (Below threshold)

4. Posted by rodney dill | August 8, 2008 7:34 AM | Score: 2 (6 votes cast)
rodney dill:

Astronomy Picture of The Day -- Rings around Uranus

4. Posted by rodney dill | August 8, 2008 7:34 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 2 (6 votes cast)

Posted on August 8, 2008 07:34

Squat, Clean, and Jerk.... (Below threshold)

5. Posted by rodney dill | August 8, 2008 7:36 AM | Score: 4 (6 votes cast)
rodney dill:

Squat, Clean, and Jerk.

5. Posted by rodney dill | August 8, 2008 7:36 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 4 (6 votes cast)

Posted on August 8, 2008 07:36

Because the urine from team... (Below threshold)

6. Posted by Baron Von Ottomatic | August 8, 2008 7:37 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Baron Von Ottomatic:

Because the urine from team Russian would burn right through a regular toilet.

6. Posted by Baron Von Ottomatic | August 8, 2008 7:37 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on August 8, 2008 07:37

After hearing what he is fu... (Below threshold)

7. Posted by Yogurt [TypeKey Profile Page] | August 8, 2008 7:40 AM | Score: 15 (17 votes cast)
Yogurt[TypeKey Profile Page]:

After hearing what he is full of, Chinese handlers hurriedly prepared for Obama's visit to the Olympics

7. Posted by Yogurt [TypeKey Profile Page] | August 8, 2008 7:40 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 15 (17 votes cast)

Posted on August 8, 2008 07:40

For a real Olympic Movement... (Below threshold)

8. Posted by thepublicdan | August 8, 2008 7:40 AM | Score: 9 (9 votes cast)
thepublicdan:

For a real Olympic Movement.

8. Posted by thepublicdan | August 8, 2008 7:40 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 9 (9 votes cast)

Posted on August 8, 2008 07:40

Like its generic counterpar... (Below threshold)

9. Posted by Baron Von Ottomatic | August 8, 2008 7:42 AM | Score: 1 (1 votes cast)
Baron Von Ottomatic:

Like its generic counterpart, female toilet gymnastics consistently draws higher ratings than the men's events.

9. Posted by Baron Von Ottomatic | August 8, 2008 7:42 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 1 (1 votes cast)

Posted on August 8, 2008 07:42

The seniors parallel bars i... (Below threshold)

10. Posted by fustian | August 8, 2008 7:53 AM | Score: 4 (4 votes cast)
fustian:

The seniors parallel bars is not for the squeamish.

10. Posted by fustian | August 8, 2008 7:53 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 4 (4 votes cast)

Posted on August 8, 2008 07:53

You must be at least this t... (Below threshold)

11. Posted by Baron Von Ottomatic | August 8, 2008 7:53 AM | Score: 3 (3 votes cast)
Baron Von Ottomatic:

You must be at least this tall to ride the decadent Western-style toilet.

11. Posted by Baron Von Ottomatic | August 8, 2008 7:53 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 3 (3 votes cast)

Posted on August 8, 2008 07:53

The IOC's request for a ven... (Below threshold)

12. Posted by fustian | August 8, 2008 7:58 AM | Score: 2 (2 votes cast)
fustian:

The IOC's request for a venue for "running" events may not have been translated faithfully.

12. Posted by fustian | August 8, 2008 7:58 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 2 (2 votes cast)

Posted on August 8, 2008 07:58

It has been customary for c... (Below threshold)

13. Posted by Maggie Mama | August 8, 2008 8:00 AM | Score: 2 (2 votes cast)
Maggie Mama:

It has been customary for countries to choose an Olympic mascot. In an attempt to prove it is the best at everything, China has chosen five "Fuwas"...this one was almost #6 until an American reporter commented on how appropriate it would be since Beijing is a shithole.

13. Posted by Maggie Mama | August 8, 2008 8:00 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 2 (2 votes cast)

Posted on August 8, 2008 08:00

American Standard introduce... (Below threshold)

14. Posted by rodney dill | August 8, 2008 8:05 AM | Score: 1 (1 votes cast)
rodney dill:

American Standard introduces the new Wide Stance Restricting Model, dubbed 'The Larry'.

14. Posted by rodney dill | August 8, 2008 8:05 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 1 (1 votes cast)

Posted on August 8, 2008 08:05

Poop like an athlete with o... (Below threshold)

15. Posted by fustian | August 8, 2008 8:09 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
fustian:

Poop like an athlete with our new Olympic Model crap catcher.

15. Posted by fustian | August 8, 2008 8:09 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on August 8, 2008 08:09

The Best Damn Metaphor Peri... (Below threshold)

16. Posted by smitch | August 8, 2008 8:12 AM | Score: 11 (11 votes cast)
smitch:

The Best Damn Metaphor Period

16. Posted by smitch | August 8, 2008 8:12 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 11 (11 votes cast)

Posted on August 8, 2008 08:12

"Where's the rosin?"... (Below threshold)

17. Posted by rodney dill | August 8, 2008 8:14 AM | Score: 2 (2 votes cast)
rodney dill:

"Where's the rosin?"

17. Posted by rodney dill | August 8, 2008 8:14 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 2 (2 votes cast)

Posted on August 8, 2008 08:14

With all the security surro... (Below threshold)

18. Posted by JLawsonn | August 8, 2008 8:16 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
JLawsonn:

With all the security surrounding the Olympics - even the toilet lids were locked down.

18. Posted by JLawsonn | August 8, 2008 8:16 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on August 8, 2008 08:16

Kohler - Official Sponsor o... (Below threshold)

19. Posted by DSkinner | August 8, 2008 8:18 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
DSkinner:

Kohler - Official Sponsor of the 2008 Olympics

19. Posted by DSkinner | August 8, 2008 8:18 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on August 8, 2008 08:18

It's for a new demonstratio... (Below threshold)

20. Posted by fustian | August 8, 2008 8:18 AM | Score: 1 (1 votes cast)
fustian:

It's for a new demonstration sport: the 15,000 meter Run, Shoot & Crap.

20. Posted by fustian | August 8, 2008 8:18 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 1 (1 votes cast)

Posted on August 8, 2008 08:18

This years Olympics feature... (Below threshold)

21. Posted by Stephen Macklin | August 8, 2008 8:25 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Stephen Macklin:

This years Olympics features a new event, the Low Flow Double Flush.

21. Posted by Stephen Macklin | August 8, 2008 8:25 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on August 8, 2008 08:25

The pooping events are expe... (Below threshold)

22. Posted by fustian | August 8, 2008 8:26 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
fustian:

The pooping events are expected to be quite popular at this Olympics. Athletes are judged on volume and ability to hit a target. Extra points are sometimes given for special fragrance.


22. Posted by fustian | August 8, 2008 8:26 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on August 8, 2008 08:26

We know it isn't Obama's. I... (Below threshold)

23. Posted by fustian | August 8, 2008 8:27 AM | Score: 3 (3 votes cast)
fustian:

We know it isn't Obama's. It isn't made of gold.

23. Posted by fustian | August 8, 2008 8:27 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 3 (3 votes cast)

Posted on August 8, 2008 08:27

Gym(nasty)ics... (Below threshold)

24. Posted by sachxn [TypeKey Profile Page] | August 8, 2008 8:28 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
sachxn[TypeKey Profile Page]:

Gym(nasty)ics

24. Posted by sachxn [TypeKey Profile Page] | August 8, 2008 8:28 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on August 8, 2008 08:28

"...and the judges rewarded... (Below threshold)

25. Posted by Tom Blogical | August 8, 2008 8:47 AM | Score: 6 (6 votes cast)
Tom Blogical:

"...and the judges rewarded him well for that one...8.5 for length, 9.0 for texture, and 9.0 for smell..."

25. Posted by Tom Blogical | August 8, 2008 8:47 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 6 (6 votes cast)

Posted on August 8, 2008 08:47

Apparently, Larry Craig rea... (Below threshold)

26. Posted by No One of Consequence | August 8, 2008 8:51 AM | Score: 4 (4 votes cast)
No One of Consequence:

Apparently, Larry Craig really was preparing for the Olympics. Who knew?

26. Posted by No One of Consequence | August 8, 2008 8:51 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 4 (4 votes cast)

Posted on August 8, 2008 08:51

Sums up my vision of this y... (Below threshold)

27. Posted by Tom Blogical | August 8, 2008 8:52 AM | Score: 1 (1 votes cast)
Tom Blogical:

Sums up my vision of this year's games perfectly.

27. Posted by Tom Blogical | August 8, 2008 8:52 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 1 (1 votes cast)

Posted on August 8, 2008 08:52

"We aim to please. You aim... (Below threshold)

28. Posted by Tom Blogical [TypeKey Profile Page] | August 8, 2008 8:53 AM | Score: 2 (4 votes cast)
Tom Blogical[TypeKey Profile Page]:

"We aim to please. You aim too, please."

28. Posted by Tom Blogical [TypeKey Profile Page] | August 8, 2008 8:53 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 2 (4 votes cast)

Posted on August 8, 2008 08:53

I always wondered how to st... (Below threshold)

29. Posted by Tom Blogical [TypeKey Profile Page] | August 8, 2008 8:54 AM | Score: 2 (2 votes cast)
Tom Blogical[TypeKey Profile Page]:

I always wondered how to start working on the Iron Cross.

29. Posted by Tom Blogical [TypeKey Profile Page] | August 8, 2008 8:54 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 2 (2 votes cast)

Posted on August 8, 2008 08:54

Chinese organizers recogniz... (Below threshold)

30. Posted by epador | August 8, 2008 8:56 AM | Score: 3 (3 votes cast)
epador:

Chinese organizers recognize the true spirit of the Olympic Movement.

30. Posted by epador | August 8, 2008 8:56 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 3 (3 votes cast)

Posted on August 8, 2008 08:56

Under closer scrutiny of th... (Below threshold)

31. Posted by Clay | August 8, 2008 8:56 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Clay:

Under closer scrutiny of the IOC rules, it was discovered that the parallel bars had been performed incorrectly all these past years. The new event has been named Friedrich Jahn's Revenge.

31. Posted by Clay | August 8, 2008 8:56 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on August 8, 2008 08:56

"The Crappel Horse programs... (Below threshold)

32. Posted by Tom Blogical [TypeKey Profile Page] | August 8, 2008 8:58 AM | Score: 3 (3 votes cast)
Tom Blogical[TypeKey Profile Page]:

"The Crappel Horse programs are usually very strenuous, and some of the dismounts can get pretty messy."

32. Posted by Tom Blogical [TypeKey Profile Page] | August 8, 2008 8:58 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 3 (3 votes cast)

Posted on August 8, 2008 08:58

"Yeah, you'll choke on our ... (Below threshold)

33. Posted by Tom Blogical [TypeKey Profile Page] | August 8, 2008 9:02 AM | Score: 1 (1 votes cast)
Tom Blogical[TypeKey Profile Page]:

"Yeah, you'll choke on our air and our water will melt your skin...but our toilets are spotless!! (Just be careful not to splash on yourself.)"

33. Posted by Tom Blogical [TypeKey Profile Page] | August 8, 2008 9:02 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 1 (1 votes cast)

Posted on August 8, 2008 09:02

Hey, I heard the Olympics h... (Below threshold)

34. Posted by Conservachef | August 8, 2008 9:09 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Conservachef:

Hey, I heard the Olympics had gone downhill, but I didn't think that they'd really gone down the toilet!

34. Posted by Conservachef | August 8, 2008 9:09 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on August 8, 2008 09:09

Here's your chance to watch... (Below threshold)

35. Posted by lawhawk | August 8, 2008 9:23 AM | Score: 1 (1 votes cast)
lawhawk:

Here's your chance to watch Mr Hanky go for the gold with a triple lindy.

35. Posted by lawhawk | August 8, 2008 9:23 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 1 (1 votes cast)

Posted on August 8, 2008 09:23

Not exactly American Standa... (Below threshold)

36. Posted by woody | August 8, 2008 9:30 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
woody:

Not exactly American Standard . . .

36. Posted by woody | August 8, 2008 9:30 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on August 8, 2008 09:30

I don't think we're in Kans... (Below threshold)

37. Posted by Lindy R. Dole | August 8, 2008 9:44 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Lindy R. Dole:

I don't think we're in Kansas anymore, Toto

37. Posted by Lindy R. Dole | August 8, 2008 9:44 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on August 8, 2008 09:44

"...and the judges... (Below threshold)

38. Posted by rodney dill | August 8, 2008 9:52 AM | Score: 3 (3 votes cast)
rodney dill:
"...and the judges rewarded him well for that one...8.5 for length, 9.0 for texture, and 9.0 for smell..."
...and he stuck the landing.

38. Posted by rodney dill | August 8, 2008 9:52 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 3 (3 votes cast)

Posted on August 8, 2008 09:52

Going for the Gold!... (Below threshold)

39. Posted by Tango | August 8, 2008 9:57 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Tango:

Going for the Gold!

39. Posted by Tango | August 8, 2008 9:57 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on August 8, 2008 09:57

The new Olympic event gave ... (Below threshold)

40. Posted by BlogDog | August 8, 2008 10:00 AM | Score: 1 (1 votes cast)
BlogDog:

The new Olympic event gave a whole new meaning to the phrase "stick the dismount."

40. Posted by BlogDog | August 8, 2008 10:00 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 1 (1 votes cast)

Posted on August 8, 2008 10:00

I like the 'Now See Dung' m... (Below threshold)

41. Posted by rodney dill | August 8, 2008 10:02 AM | Score: 1 (1 votes cast)
rodney dill:

I like the 'Now See Dung' model with waving Chairman better.

41. Posted by rodney dill | August 8, 2008 10:02 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 1 (1 votes cast)

Posted on August 8, 2008 10:02

Just Do It... (Below threshold)

42. Posted by Porkopolis | August 8, 2008 10:08 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Porkopolis:

Just Do It

42. Posted by Porkopolis | August 8, 2008 10:08 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on August 8, 2008 10:08

The People's toilets at the... (Below threshold)

43. Posted by SideShowJane | August 8, 2008 10:27 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
SideShowJane:

The People's toilets at the Olympic village are not very private but they do come with an option of having the attendant gently clean your bottom. After finishing, simply stand, turn, and bend over using the rails for support and holler, "Du Poo!"

43. Posted by SideShowJane | August 8, 2008 10:27 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on August 8, 2008 10:27

Finally, an Olympic event I... (Below threshold)

44. Posted by Peter F. | August 8, 2008 11:06 AM | Score: 2 (2 votes cast)
Peter F.:

Finally, an Olympic event I can enter and take home the gold.

44. Posted by Peter F. | August 8, 2008 11:06 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 2 (2 votes cast)

Posted on August 8, 2008 11:06

The 2008 Head Games... (Below threshold)

45. Posted by Peter F. | August 8, 2008 11:11 AM | Score: 1 (1 votes cast)
Peter F.:

The 2008 Head Games

45. Posted by Peter F. | August 8, 2008 11:11 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 1 (1 votes cast)

Posted on August 8, 2008 11:11

Considering the crap they u... (Below threshold)

46. Posted by john1v6 | August 8, 2008 11:23 AM | Score: 1 (1 votes cast)
john1v6:

Considering the crap they usually broadcast, NBC was surprised that the Synchronized Sh*tting event drew such poor ratings

46. Posted by john1v6 | August 8, 2008 11:23 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 1 (1 votes cast)

Posted on August 8, 2008 11:23

Senator McCain's Olympic Cr... (Below threshold)

47. Posted by Matt | August 8, 2008 11:25 AM | Score: -5 (5 votes cast)
Matt:

Senator McCain's Olympic Crapper...

47. Posted by Matt | August 8, 2008 11:25 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: -5 (5 votes cast)

Posted on August 8, 2008 11:25

Senator Obama's new rainbow... (Below threshold)

48. Posted by GarandFan | August 8, 2008 11:27 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
GarandFan:

Senator Obama's new rainbow 'salute' suddenly started showing up everywhere.

48. Posted by GarandFan | August 8, 2008 11:27 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on August 8, 2008 11:27

"Welcome to China. Deposit... (Below threshold)

49. Posted by Tom Blogical | August 8, 2008 11:27 AM | Score: 7 (7 votes cast)
Tom Blogical:

"Welcome to China. Deposit your Human Rights here."

49. Posted by Tom Blogical | August 8, 2008 11:27 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 7 (7 votes cast)

Posted on August 8, 2008 11:27

"Look Senator Obama, they p... (Below threshold)

50. Posted by Matt | August 8, 2008 11:27 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Matt:

"Look Senator Obama, they put to many O's on your Toilet."

"Yeah, they forgot President, too."

50. Posted by Matt | August 8, 2008 11:27 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on August 8, 2008 11:27

First, there was competitiv... (Below threshold)

51. Posted by Baron Von Ottomatic | August 8, 2008 11:36 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Baron Von Ottomatic:

First, there was competitive eating. Tune in this Fall on Fox as we give you an exclusive peek into what happens after the trophies are handed out.

51. Posted by Baron Von Ottomatic | August 8, 2008 11:36 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on August 8, 2008 11:36

"The Chinese team is hoping... (Below threshold)

52. Posted by Tom Blogical | August 8, 2008 11:41 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Tom Blogical:

"The Chinese team is hoping to flush the competition in the Crappel Horse this year by unveiling their new signature move, the Shiitake."

52. Posted by Tom Blogical | August 8, 2008 11:41 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on August 8, 2008 11:41

NBC: In the tank for Obama... (Below threshold)

53. Posted by colejusmc | August 8, 2008 11:44 AM | Score: 2 (2 votes cast)
colejusmc:

NBC: In the tank for Obama. In the tank for Red China.

53. Posted by colejusmc | August 8, 2008 11:44 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 2 (2 votes cast)

Posted on August 8, 2008 11:44

Worst...parallel bar routin... (Below threshold)

54. Posted by Master Shake | August 8, 2008 11:44 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Master Shake:

Worst...parallel bar routine...ever!

54. Posted by Master Shake | August 8, 2008 11:44 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on August 8, 2008 11:44

"All your crap are belong t... (Below threshold)

55. Posted by Tom Blogical [TypeKey Profile Page] | August 8, 2008 11:53 AM | Score: 1 (1 votes cast)
Tom Blogical[TypeKey Profile Page]:

"All your crap are belong to us!"

55. Posted by Tom Blogical [TypeKey Profile Page] | August 8, 2008 11:53 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 1 (1 votes cast)

Posted on August 8, 2008 11:53

Those of you who have docum... (Below threshold)

56. Posted by [IMH] | August 8, 2008 12:10 PM | Score: 1 (1 votes cast)
[IMH]:

Those of you who have documented disabilities, demonstrated by presenting Forms G, Q, and X to the door guard, may use our specially designed disability toilet.

Everyone else may use with pleasure the luxurious bucket seen on the right.

56. Posted by [IMH] | August 8, 2008 12:10 PM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 1 (1 votes cast)

Posted on August 8, 2008 12:10

China's Olympic organizers ... (Below threshold)

57. Posted by UncleOlaf | August 8, 2008 12:20 PM | Score: 1 (1 votes cast)
UncleOlaf:

China's Olympic organizers revealed for the first time today their state of the art gender test...

They force everyone to dring 2 gallons of black tea, and anyone who leaves the lid up is labeled "male".
They did hit a snag however with several of the Soviet female gymnasts who managed to hit a hole in one from across the room...

57. Posted by UncleOlaf | August 8, 2008 12:20 PM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 1 (1 votes cast)

Posted on August 8, 2008 12:20

Government Executive Toilet... (Below threshold)

58. Posted by Jer | August 8, 2008 12:38 PM | Score: 1 (1 votes cast)
Jer:

Government Executive Toilet.....$500
Custom Padded Precious PVC Hand Assists.....$25
Being First In Line out of the 16000 Athletes and Officials.....Priceless

Work has already commenced on the second one.

58. Posted by Jer | August 8, 2008 12:38 PM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 1 (1 votes cast)

Posted on August 8, 2008 12:38

STD's not included... (Below threshold)

59. Posted by rodney dill | August 8, 2008 12:51 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
rodney dill:

STD's not included

59. Posted by rodney dill | August 8, 2008 12:51 PM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on August 8, 2008 12:51

In People's Republic of Chi... (Below threshold)

60. Posted by Baron Von Ottomatic | August 8, 2008 1:17 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Baron Von Ottomatic:

In People's Republic of China toilet flushes Yu.

60. Posted by Baron Von Ottomatic | August 8, 2008 1:17 PM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on August 8, 2008 13:17

Oh my god, that fortune coo... (Below threshold)

61. Posted by Baron Von Ottomatic | August 8, 2008 1:20 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Baron Von Ottomatic:

Oh my god, that fortune cookie I got last night makes so much sense now...

61. Posted by Baron Von Ottomatic | August 8, 2008 1:20 PM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on August 8, 2008 13:20

The location for the new "W... (Below threshold)

62. Posted by physics geek | August 8, 2008 1:21 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
physics geek:

The location for the new "Where have my civil rights gone?" competition in Beijing.

62. Posted by physics geek | August 8, 2008 1:21 PM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on August 8, 2008 13:21

When Obamanomics set in, th... (Below threshold)

63. Posted by Dale A | August 8, 2008 1:26 PM | Score: 1 (1 votes cast)
Dale A:

When Obamanomics set in, the GDP and stock market will be here. Hold on with both hands!

63. Posted by Dale A | August 8, 2008 1:26 PM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 1 (1 votes cast)

Posted on August 8, 2008 13:26

"No, it's not a public toil... (Below threshold)

64. Posted by Tom Blogical [TypeKey Profile Page] | August 8, 2008 1:46 PM | Score: 3 (3 votes cast)
Tom Blogical[TypeKey Profile Page]:

"No, it's not a public toilet. It's The People's Toilet. Big difference."

64. Posted by Tom Blogical [TypeKey Profile Page] | August 8, 2008 1:46 PM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 3 (3 votes cast)

Posted on August 8, 2008 13:46

Typical communist pro... (Below threshold)

65. Posted by DJ Drummond | August 8, 2008 1:48 PM | Score: 10 (10 votes cast)
DJ Drummond:

Typical communist project. Pipes going up, down, and all around, but none actually attached to make it really flush

65. Posted by DJ Drummond | August 8, 2008 1:48 PM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 10 (10 votes cast)

Posted on August 8, 2008 13:48

Venue for newly approved Ol... (Below threshold)

66. Posted by CB | August 8, 2008 2:36 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
CB:

Venue for newly approved Olympic event, the Turd Drop.

66. Posted by CB | August 8, 2008 2:36 PM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on August 8, 2008 14:36

Handicap Toilet for use by ... (Below threshold)

67. Posted by dfbaskwill | August 8, 2008 2:43 PM | Score: -1 (1 votes cast)
dfbaskwill:

Handicap Toilet for use by all handicapped Olympians! (Citizens Bank Park in Phila. has a mandated elevator for use by all handicapped relief pitchers!)

67. Posted by dfbaskwill | August 8, 2008 2:43 PM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: -1 (1 votes cast)

Posted on August 8, 2008 14:43

China's answer to th... (Below threshold)

68. Posted by observer | August 8, 2008 2:46 PM | Score: 1 (1 votes cast)
observer:


China's answer to the old "superglue on the toilet" trick...

68. Posted by observer | August 8, 2008 2:46 PM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 1 (1 votes cast)

Posted on August 8, 2008 14:46

John? John Edwards? Are y... (Below threshold)

69. Posted by Jer | August 8, 2008 4:21 PM | Score: 3 (3 votes cast)
Jer:

John? John Edwards? Are you in there?

69. Posted by Jer | August 8, 2008 4:21 PM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 3 (3 votes cast)

Posted on August 8, 2008 16:21

John Edwards could not be r... (Below threshold)

70. Posted by lawhawk | August 8, 2008 5:47 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
lawhawk:

John Edwards could not be reached for comment...

70. Posted by lawhawk | August 8, 2008 5:47 PM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on August 8, 2008 17:47

Chinese officials today rei... (Below threshold)

71. Posted by Rickbert [TypeKey Profile Page] | August 8, 2008 6:22 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Rickbert[TypeKey Profile Page]:

Chinese officials today reiterated their commitment to freedom of expression in public affairs by opening the first of many Suggestion Boxes for Political Reform.

71. Posted by Rickbert [TypeKey Profile Page] | August 8, 2008 6:22 PM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on August 8, 2008 18:22

Despite massive Chinese pre... (Below threshold)

72. Posted by retired military | August 8, 2008 6:25 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
retired military:

Despite massive Chinese preparation this year's Olympic coverage is the toilet.

72. Posted by retired military | August 8, 2008 6:25 PM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on August 8, 2008 18:25

The Chinese government quic... (Below threshold)

73. Posted by retired military | August 8, 2008 7:18 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
retired military:

The Chinese government quickly realized that holding the Olympics in their country was a big crap shoot.

73. Posted by retired military | August 8, 2008 7:18 PM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on August 8, 2008 19:18

The "thanks for a job well ... (Below threshold)

74. Posted by Dan Melson | August 8, 2008 8:29 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Dan Melson:

The "thanks for a job well done" to the Olympic Site Selection Committee

74. Posted by Dan Melson | August 8, 2008 8:29 PM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on August 8, 2008 20:29

I completely understand. I... (Below threshold)

75. Posted by DaveD | August 8, 2008 9:28 PM | Score: 2 (2 votes cast)
DaveD:

I completely understand. I stink on the parallel bars too.

75. Posted by DaveD | August 8, 2008 9:28 PM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 2 (2 votes cast)

Posted on August 8, 2008 21:28

Chinese "birthing station" ... (Below threshold)

76. Posted by Mark Ducharme [TypeKey Profile Page] | August 8, 2008 9:57 PM | Score: 1 (1 votes cast)
Mark Ducharme[TypeKey Profile Page]:

Chinese "birthing station" for moms having girls.

76. Posted by Mark Ducharme [TypeKey Profile Page] | August 8, 2008 9:57 PM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 1 (1 votes cast)

Posted on August 8, 2008 21:57

"All right! I got home in t... (Below threshold)

77. Posted by Mark Ducharme [TypeKey Profile Page] | August 8, 2008 10:12 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Mark Ducharme[TypeKey Profile Page]:

"All right! I got home in time for the 'Quran-a-thon'!"

77. Posted by Mark Ducharme [TypeKey Profile Page] | August 8, 2008 10:12 PM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on August 8, 2008 22:12

The last thing your plate o... (Below threshold)

78. Posted by Mark Ducharme [TypeKey Profile Page] | August 8, 2008 10:14 PM | Score: -1 (1 votes cast)
Mark Ducharme[TypeKey Profile Page]:

The last thing your plate of "chow-fun" really saw.

78. Posted by Mark Ducharme [TypeKey Profile Page] | August 8, 2008 10:14 PM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: -1 (1 votes cast)

Posted on August 8, 2008 22:14

Confucius say, "Crap in han... (Below threshold)

79. Posted by Mark Ducharme [TypeKey Profile Page] | August 8, 2008 10:23 PM | Score: -1 (1 votes cast)
Mark Ducharme[TypeKey Profile Page]:

Confucius say, "Crap in hand and wish in other,no matter,you no get this beauty".

79. Posted by Mark Ducharme [TypeKey Profile Page] | August 8, 2008 10:23 PM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: -1 (1 votes cast)

Posted on August 8, 2008 22:23

Confucius say, "When you no... (Below threshold)

80. Posted by Mark Ducharme [TypeKey Profile Page] | August 8, 2008 10:28 PM | Score: -1 (1 votes cast)
Mark Ducharme[TypeKey Profile Page]:

Confucius say, "When you not know wrich wray to approach commode, you prease to have ingest real ancient Chinese seclet."

80. Posted by Mark Ducharme [TypeKey Profile Page] | August 8, 2008 10:28 PM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: -1 (1 votes cast)

Posted on August 8, 2008 22:28

Freedom to worship: Pricele... (Below threshold)

81. Posted by Mark Ducharme [TypeKey Profile Page] | August 8, 2008 10:34 PM | Score: -2 (2 votes cast)
Mark Ducharme[TypeKey Profile Page]:

Freedom to worship: Priceless
Freedom to protest: Priceless
What China thinks of these freedoms: They can't spare a (Tiananmen) square

81. Posted by Mark Ducharme [TypeKey Profile Page] | August 8, 2008 10:34 PM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: -2 (2 votes cast)

Posted on August 8, 2008 22:34

Confucius say, "One who wri... (Below threshold)

82. Posted by Mark Ducharme [TypeKey Profile Page] | August 8, 2008 10:51 PM | Score: -1 (1 votes cast)
Mark Ducharme[TypeKey Profile Page]:

Confucius say, "One who wrie down writh red Chinese,wrake up with new persplective on rife."

82. Posted by Mark Ducharme [TypeKey Profile Page] | August 8, 2008 10:51 PM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: -1 (1 votes cast)

Posted on August 8, 2008 22:51

Confucius say, "Raugh and t... (Below threshold)

83. Posted by Mark Ducharme [TypeKey Profile Page] | August 8, 2008 10:56 PM | Score: -1 (1 votes cast)
Mark Ducharme[TypeKey Profile Page]:

Confucius say, "Raugh and the world raughs writh you. Cly? Well, you obviousry in China my flend."

83. Posted by Mark Ducharme [TypeKey Profile Page] | August 8, 2008 10:56 PM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: -1 (1 votes cast)

Posted on August 8, 2008 22:56

toilet: "Sen. Obama,what wo... (Below threshold)

84. Posted by Mark Ducharme [TypeKey Profile Page] | August 8, 2008 11:16 PM | Score: -2 (2 votes cast)
Mark Ducharme[TypeKey Profile Page]:

toilet: "Sen. Obama,what would you do about Russia?"
BO: "I'm kinda busy sweetie,couldja keep it down?"

84. Posted by Mark Ducharme [TypeKey Profile Page] | August 8, 2008 11:16 PM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: -2 (2 votes cast)

Posted on August 8, 2008 23:16

Didja hear the one about th... (Below threshold)

85. Posted by Mark Ducharme [TypeKey Profile Page] | August 9, 2008 12:40 AM | Score: -2 (2 votes cast)
Mark Ducharme[TypeKey Profile Page]:

Didja hear the one about the Chinese islamist and the public ...tick,tick,tick
BOOM!!!


85. Posted by Mark Ducharme [TypeKey Profile Page] | August 9, 2008 12:40 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: -2 (2 votes cast)

Posted on August 9, 2008 00:40

Confucius say, "Hey,Orympic... (Below threshold)

86. Posted by Mark Ducharme [TypeKey Profile Page] | August 9, 2008 12:43 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Mark Ducharme[TypeKey Profile Page]:

Confucius say, "Hey,Orympics happen."

86. Posted by Mark Ducharme [TypeKey Profile Page] | August 9, 2008 12:43 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on August 9, 2008 00:43

In a blatent act of subvers... (Below threshold)

87. Posted by Mark Ducharme [TypeKey Profile Page] | August 9, 2008 12:59 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Mark Ducharme[TypeKey Profile Page]:

In a blatent act of subversion today,Chinese industry unvailed its new tool to keep American octogenarians actively gumming up US commerce. Dubbed "The Creeping Crapper" the new device has the covert community and everyone in State scrambling to devise harsh porcelain tariffs and crushing tp excise taxes.When asked his opinion, Sen. Bob "Sheets" Byrd said, "zzzzz,WHAT? Who's there? Bocephus? Isatchooboy? Come fetch me my slippers boy...zzzzz"

87. Posted by Mark Ducharme [TypeKey Profile Page] | August 9, 2008 12:59 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on August 9, 2008 00:59

"Just Do It"<p... (Below threshold)

88. Posted by Headzero | August 9, 2008 1:16 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Headzero:

"Just Do It"

42. Posted by Porkopolis

I think you meant

"Just Poo it"

88. Posted by Headzero | August 9, 2008 1:16 PM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on August 9, 2008 13:16

"The Olympics were marred b... (Below threshold)

89. Posted by Faith+1 | August 9, 2008 1:48 PM | Score: 1 (1 votes cast)
Faith+1:

"The Olympics were marred by the tragic drowning death of Simon Smythe during a complex dismount from The Olympic Pommel John."

89. Posted by Faith+1 | August 9, 2008 1:48 PM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 1 (1 votes cast)

Posted on August 9, 2008 13:48

Go (here) World.... (Below threshold)

90. Posted by itismedavid | August 9, 2008 2:15 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
itismedavid:

Go (here) World.

90. Posted by itismedavid | August 9, 2008 2:15 PM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on August 9, 2008 14:15

Mr. Hu. It was the Soviets ... (Below threshold)

91. Posted by Strider | August 9, 2008 4:01 PM | Score: -1 (1 votes cast)
Strider:

Mr. Hu. It was the Soviets who were supposed to tear down walls. Sheesh!

91. Posted by Strider | August 9, 2008 4:01 PM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: -1 (1 votes cast)

Posted on August 9, 2008 16:01

Chinese translaters mistake... (Below threshold)

92. Posted by retired military | August 9, 2008 4:38 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
retired military:

Chinese translaters mistakenly thought that Barrack had already won the Presidential election and thus designed the official President Obama Presidential Seal for his upcoming visit.

92. Posted by retired military | August 9, 2008 4:38 PM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on August 9, 2008 16:38

"Just ... (Below threshold)

93. Posted by ijosha | August 9, 2008 5:51 PM | Score: 1 (1 votes cast)
ijosha:
"Just Do It"

42. Posted by Porkopolis

I think you meant

"Just Poo it"

88. Posted by Headzero

"Just Do Do It" ?

93. Posted by ijosha | August 9, 2008 5:51 PM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 1 (1 votes cast)

Posted on August 9, 2008 17:51

Brilliant! All that, and t... (Below threshold)

94. Posted by ijosha | August 9, 2008 5:57 PM | Score: 1 (1 votes cast)
ijosha:

Brilliant! All that, and they still couldn't figure out how to hang a toilet-paper roll?

94. Posted by ijosha | August 9, 2008 5:57 PM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 1 (1 votes cast)

Posted on August 9, 2008 17:57

Optional for the gymnast wi... (Below threshold)

95. Posted by LaMedusa | August 9, 2008 8:09 PM | Score: 1 (1 votes cast)
LaMedusa:

Optional for the gymnast with a problem dismount.

95. Posted by LaMedusa | August 9, 2008 8:09 PM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 1 (1 votes cast)

Posted on August 9, 2008 20:09

Chinese authorities insist ... (Below threshold)

96. Posted by ptg | August 9, 2008 9:22 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
ptg:

Chinese authorities insist Western-style toilet stalls are not bugged: "Everyone can see there is no invasion of privacy."

96. Posted by ptg | August 9, 2008 9:22 PM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on August 9, 2008 21:22

Unfortunately Wong's Pu-Pu ... (Below threshold)

97. Posted by rodney dill | August 10, 2008 4:31 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
rodney dill:

Unfortunately Wong's Pu-Pu Platters is located just one floor lower.

97. Posted by rodney dill | August 10, 2008 4:31 PM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on August 10, 2008 16:31

...and given the water supp... (Below threshold)

98. Posted by rodney dill | August 10, 2008 4:32 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
rodney dill:

...and given the water supply you'll need to visit here again just an hour later.

98. Posted by rodney dill | August 10, 2008 4:32 PM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on August 10, 2008 16:32

DIY water recycling... (Below threshold)

99. Posted by rodney dill | August 10, 2008 4:33 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
rodney dill:

DIY water recycling

99. Posted by rodney dill | August 10, 2008 4:33 PM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on August 10, 2008 16:33

"...and you said Mike Rowe ... (Below threshold)

100. Posted by rodney dill | August 10, 2008 4:34 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
rodney dill:

"...and you said Mike Rowe wouldn't even touch this one?"

100. Posted by rodney dill | August 10, 2008 4:34 PM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on August 10, 2008 16:34

The coaches kept telling th... (Below threshold)

101. Posted by Jeff Blogworthy | August 10, 2008 8:50 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Jeff Blogworthy:

The coaches kept telling them to "get the lead out of their butts"...

101. Posted by Jeff Blogworthy | August 10, 2008 8:50 PM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on August 10, 2008 20:50

Update: <... (Below threshold)

102. Posted by Kevin [TypeKey Profile Page] | August 11, 2008 1:45 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Kevin[TypeKey Profile Page]:

Update: Winners announced. Click the link to read the winning entries. The contest is now closed.

102. Posted by Kevin [TypeKey Profile Page] | August 11, 2008 1:45 AM | Vote up Vote down Report this comment Score: 0 (0 votes cast)

Posted on August 11, 2008 01:45




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