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Wizbang Weekend Caption Contest™

It's Friday, which means it's time for the Wizbang Weekend Caption Contest™. Enter your best caption for the following picture:


President Barack Obama looks at a map donated to the White House by the National Geographic Society, in the Oval Office, June 10, 2009. (Official White House Photo by Pete Souza)


Winners will be announced Monday morning.

Update: Winners announced. Click the link to read the winning entries. The contest is now closed.


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Comments (199)

I am the world I am ... (Below threshold)
Maggie Mama:

I am the world
I am the children
I am the one who makes a brighter day
So you start giving.
There's a choice I'm making
I'm saving your own lives
It's true I'll make a better day
Just for you, done by me.

B.O.: "GYOT DAMN...Palau is... (Below threshold)
markm:

B.O.: "GYOT DAMN...Palau is way over THERE????"

B.O.: "..awe dang....it IS ... (Below threshold)
markm:

B.O.: "..awe dang....it IS really flat..."

I am the ruler of all I sur... (Below threshold)
Maggie Mama:

I am the ruler of all I survey.

Uhm, Michelle wanted to go ... (Below threshold)
Maggie Mama:

Uhm, Michelle wanted to go where for dinner?

Finally, my map with the U.... (Below threshold)
tomg51:

Finally, my map with the U.S. brushed off to the side.

President Obama contemplate... (Below threshold)
iwogisdead:

President Obama contemplates the sites to include in his "Apology for America" tour.

B.O. sings: "Who's the guy ... (Below threshold)
markm:

B.O. sings: "Who's the guy you need to know when there's a place you gotta what's my name? MAP"
(A little Dora the Explorer ditty)

Obama surveys the South Pol... (Below threshold)
Spencer:

Obama surveys the South Pole as he readies his global warming apoligy tour to the penguins.

Michael Jackson you are a g... (Below threshold)
Stan25:

Michael Jackson you are a god send. Now I can conquer the world and no one would even know about it

The eagle wished for a "Nig... (Below threshold)
tomg51:

The eagle wished for a "Night at the Museum" moment

edit: "when there's a place... (Below threshold)
markm:

edit: "when there's a place you gotta go"

"Would you look at that! Ir... (Below threshold)
Eric:

"Would you look at that! Iran and Iraq are right next to each other."

Risk! The Game of World Con... (Below threshold)
Eric:

Risk! The Game of World Conquest: Barack Obama Edition.

Occasionally Obama likes to... (Below threshold)
fustian:

Occasionally Obama likes to take a dump on the Great Seal, just like he has on the country.

My Brother George is where?... (Below threshold)
Pretzel Logic:

My Brother George is where?

Look no borders...perfect.<... (Below threshold)
Pretzel Logic:

Look no borders...perfect.

Teleprompter tryouts.... (Below threshold)
fustian:

Teleprompter tryouts.

Pres. Obama takes one last ... (Below threshold)
Eric:

Pres. Obama takes one last look at another gift from Great Britain before he returns it.

How far away can we ship Ru... (Below threshold)
Pretzel Logic:

How far away can we ship Rush Limbaugh?

Land for peace, land for pe... (Below threshold)
fustian:

Land for peace, land for peace... Hey, we could give the Red states to the Palestinians! No one's using them anyway except bitter people clinging to guns and religion.

Mine! All Mine!... (Below threshold)
pibill:

Mine! All Mine!

This is my best paint by nu... (Below threshold)
Prairie:

This is my best paint by number masterpiece yet!

Hmmm, where did I put those... (Below threshold)
RickM:

Hmmm, where did I put those other 7 states?

Don't know much about geogr... (Below threshold)
ordi:

Don't know much about geography
Don't know much trigonometry
Don't know much about algebra
Don't know what a slide rule is for

Barack is making sure he kn... (Below threshold)
fustian:

Barack is making sure he knows where Mecca is before starting evening prayers...

Yep, I think I got them all... (Below threshold)
ms960:

Yep, I think I got them all. No one left to apologize to.

'Now let's see...which coun... (Below threshold)
hermie:

'Now let's see...which countries with ruthless dictators haven't yet been invited to my July 4th party?'

"Come on guys, I said I wan... (Below threshold)
JP:

"Come on guys, I said I wanted red pushpins in all the countries I've apologized to, blue in the ones I still need to get to and a big black "X" on Israel. You guys are making this harder than eating a waffle!"

Now let's see...where is th... (Below threshold)
J.R.:

Now let's see...where is that 57th state.

"Why am I not at the center... (Below threshold)
P. Bunyan:

"Why am I not at the center of the map? Everyone knows the world revolves around me after all."

Barack Obama prefers vintag... (Below threshold)
Neoluddite:

Barack Obama prefers vintage maps. He enjoys the beauty, craftsmanship, and there is no state of Israel.

...and God called the dry g... (Below threshold)
Jeff Blogworthy:

...and God called the dry ground "land," and the gathered waters he called "seas." And God saw that it was good.

"Let's see.....I'm already ... (Below threshold)
zipity:

"Let's see.....I'm already buddies with Hugo, Evo, and Castro....who can I apologize to next to make friends and influence people...."

After all these questions t... (Below threshold)
Hank:

After all these questions this week, where the hell is Iran?

As Obama casts his eyes on ... (Below threshold)
Jeff Blogworthy:

As Obama casts his eyes on the Middles East he instinctively drops to his knees in deference.

"I can see Russia from my c... (Below threshold)

"I can see Russia from my crouch!"

"HEY RAHM! What do you thin... (Below threshold)
exceller:

"HEY RAHM! What do you think? Should I put Barackistan in Africa or the Middle East?"

They love me there, there t... (Below threshold)
IowaRight:

They love me there, there too, love me, love me, reeeeally love me, I am Huge there, love me....

President Obama tries to de... (Below threshold)
Dodo David:

President Obama tries to decide which nation to send his wife and daughters to for medical help in the event that Obamacare becomes a reality.

Yup, the United States is t... (Below threshold)
Jeff Blogworthy:

Yup, the United States is the lone bastion of liberty in the world. Gonna have to do something about that.

Hezbollah 25 billion... Ira... (Below threshold)
Jeff Blogworthy:

Hezbollah 25 billion... Iran 25 billion... China 25 billion... Russia 50 billion... North Korea...

Where in the worldis</e... (Below threshold)
Jeff Medcalf:

Where in the worldis Carmen Sandiego?

It's so much easier to find... (Below threshold)

It's so much easier to find Chicago on Google Earth.

Look at all of that opportu... (Below threshold)
IowaRight:

Look at all of that opportunity, RAHM! Are you absolutely sure there is no way to tax people in these other countries?

Get me a pair of scissors. ... (Below threshold)
Jeff Blogworthy:

Get me a pair of scissors. I'm going to cut out the West and throw it in the garbage.

Hmm. i left my campaign pro... (Below threshold)
wildman:

Hmm. i left my campaign promises somewhere, Probably left them somewhere on my world apology tour.

"Hey, Rahm! When did you s... (Below threshold)
iurockhead:

"Hey, Rahm! When did you say the oceans should start receding?"

♫ And Iran, Iran so far awa... (Below threshold)
Matt:

♫ And Iran, Iran so far away-yay-yay...♫

"They say if you stare long... (Below threshold)
commonsense247:

"They say if you stare long enough at the shapes without focusing, a magical picture appears before your eyes.. you know, the same approach I take to healthcare."

Dude - You're supposed to b... (Below threshold)
JohnG:

Dude - You're supposed to bow to the actual Mecca!

Been there...Been th... (Below threshold)

Been there...
Been there...
Born there...
Been there...

OH yeah, where was I born..... (Below threshold)
geo Author Profile Page:

OH yeah, where was I born...oh right there!!

The intrinsic unfairness of... (Below threshold)
Jeff Blogworthy:

The intrinsic unfairness of all these different sized nations is apparent. My "Outcome Based Geography Initiative" will fix it.

Shutting down Gitmo, so can... (Below threshold)
Mark L:

Shutting down Gitmo, so can't send teabagger protestors there. Where else? Hmmmm. . . Do we own Juan Fernandez? How about Howland atoll?

Obama looks for the Iraq/Pa... (Below threshold)
Adrian Browne:

Obama looks for the Iraq/Pakistan border that John McCain spoke of.

My precious! ... (Below threshold)

My precious!

Barack Obama looks to Europ... (Below threshold)
Eric:

Barack Obama looks to Europe as he takes a big dump on the American Eagle.

I was born over there, my ... (Below threshold)
itismedavid:

I was born over there, my dad was from over there, my mom was from right here, I spent some of my youth over here, and some over here until my stepdad died, then spent some time here, went to school over here, that was the first time I was REALLY in the US. But I am a US citizen!!!!

I've been President for ove... (Below threshold)
DJ Drummond:

I've been President for over 100 days, and there's still not even one country named for me!

Barack Obama seeks new coun... (Below threshold)

Barack Obama seeks new countries to apologize to. American citizens wait in vain.

...55, 56, 57.... (Below threshold)
FormerHostage:

...55, 56, 57.

So Waldo, we meet again!</p... (Below threshold)
FormerHostage:

So Waldo, we meet again!

Now, where is Freedonia?</p... (Below threshold)
Jeff:

Now, where is Freedonia?

"Hmmm".. There really are o... (Below threshold)
Chris G:

"Hmmm".. There really are only 50 states. I'll be damned".

The perfect map to reflect ... (Below threshold)
Eric:

The perfect map to reflect Obama's philosphies, it's Eurocentric and America is moved so far to the left it's almost off the page.

Poor Barack was unaware tha... (Below threshold)

Poor Barack was unaware that, as President of the United States, if he made an actual request, the map could be hung at eye level!

I've got the whole world in... (Below threshold)

I've got the whole world in my hands.

Hmmmm Let's see. Where can ... (Below threshold)
Stan25:

Hmmmm Let's see. Where can I send Hillary to keep her out of my hair, today?

I KNOW there are 57 states.... (Below threshold)
luze:

I KNOW there are 57 states. Must. Look. Harder.

YOU ARE HERE.... (Below threshold)
Joe Miller:

YOU ARE HERE.

Reading while on the john.<... (Below threshold)
epador:

Reading while on the john.

Let's see. Where to take M... (Below threshold)
GarandFan:

Let's see. Where to take Michelle on this weeks 'date night'. Paris? Venice? Monte Carlo?

"Gee, I wish the World of W... (Below threshold)
tony:

"Gee, I wish the World of Warcraft map on my PC was this detailed."

And Obama gazed at his king... (Below threshold)
Dave:

And Obama gazed at his kingdom and wept, for there were no more worlds to conquer.

From the MSNBC newsroom:<br... (Below threshold)

From the MSNBC newsroom:
"The map of the world will be displayed at eye level for Chinese President Hu Jintao's oval office meeting with Barack O' Teleprompter."

Iran...Iran...Iran... ah th... (Below threshold)
SillyPuddy:

Iran...Iran...Iran... ah there it is, hey guys I found it!


Hmm, lets see who I can let punk me next.

Obama thought bubble:<block... (Below threshold)

Obama thought bubble:

Heh, 'Atlas Shrugged' my ass!

Okay I see Siam and Prussia... (Below threshold)
jeff clark:

Okay I see Siam and Prussia where the hell is that 57th state?

Where in the world is Carme... (Below threshold)
Brad Punch:

Where in the world is Carmen San Diego?

Where's Waldo?... (Below threshold)
Brad Punch:

Where's Waldo?

47, 48, 49 , 50 ... damn! S... (Below threshold)
LiberalNitemare:

47, 48, 49 , 50 ... damn! Still only 50!

bin Laden? I'm still trying... (Below threshold)

bin Laden? I'm still trying to find Waldo.

I am a god to this ... (Below threshold)

I am a god to this world!

WOW, the Persian Empire is ... (Below threshold)
Meiji_man:

WOW, the Persian Empire is HUGE better not mess with them!

If I sell Alaska to Russia ... (Below threshold)
JAT:

If I sell Alaska to Russia my Palin troubles will just go away!

And on the 7th day, he rest... (Below threshold)
sallym:

And on the 7th day, he rested and say "It is good!"

Mr. President hell! It's Mr... (Below threshold)
JAT:

Mr. President hell! It's Mr. Emperor now!

Still searching for a count... (Below threshold)

Still searching for a country where socialized medicine works pretty well.

"Mine, all mine. Bwahahaha... (Below threshold)
LaMedusa:

"Mine, all mine. Bwahahaha!"

Note to myself - tell staff... (Below threshold)
JAT:

Note to myself - tell staffers to program teleprompter with the names of all these countries. I sure 'n hell wont remember their names.!

"Now, where is this Indones... (Below threshold)
LaMedusa:

"Now, where is this Indonesia place people keep sayin' I was born at."

Obama, trying to figure out... (Below threshold)
LaMedusa:

Obama, trying to figure out how to bow to the east via satellite.

Let's see which country I c... (Below threshold)
JAT:

Let's see which country I can pop off to to get some ice cream this week.

Dont forget to wipe!... (Below threshold)
914:

Dont forget to wipe!

"Don't worry little map. My... (Below threshold)
NJ Mike:

"Don't worry little map. My program for all disadvantaged non-hung maps and pictures will soon have you on my wall.........say 2029.....oh, the indignities you've suffered, down here on the floor. Just Hope for Change."

Hmmm. There must be som... (Below threshold)
Robert Koslover:

Hmmm. There must be some way to tax them all.

Ah hah, I knew it! Africa <... (Below threshold)
Robert Koslover:

Ah hah, I knew it! Africa is bigger than Texas!

I'm not sure, Al. Those ic... (Below threshold)
Robert Koslover:

I'm not sure, Al. Those icecaps still look about the same size to me.

So that's where the UFO act... (Below threshold)
Mac Lorry:

So that's where the UFO actually crashed back in the 50's, and look there are some from the 60's, 70's, 80's... What the hell, maybe we're are about to be invaded.

Monopoly for "adults"?... (Below threshold)
xiphos:

Monopoly for "adults"?

Now where the heck was I bo... (Below threshold)
jbw:

Now where the heck was I born??

Iran? That's somewhere nea... (Below threshold)
Wayne:

Iran? That's somewhere near France, isn't it?

Let's see. Which countries... (Below threshold)
GarandFan:

Let's see. Which countries haven't I apologized to yet?

...55, 56, 57!... (Below threshold)
AughtSix:

...55, 56, 57!

Damn, look what I inherited... (Below threshold)
Brad:

Damn, look what I inherited!

Now that the Iranians aren'... (Below threshold)
_Mike_:

Now that the Iranians aren't coming for the 4th, anyone want a world map without Israel on it ?

As Barry ponders the though... (Below threshold)
Stan25:

As Barry ponders the thought of sending Hillary to the South Pole, he lets one rip

OK, very funny. Who stole ... (Below threshold)

OK, very funny. Who stole the "You are here" sticker?

Damn, now where did I leave... (Below threshold)
Mycroft:

Damn, now where did I leave my integrity?

Obama prepares to take yet ... (Below threshold)

Obama prepares to take yet another crap on the Presidential Seal.

Obama finally reads the Atl... (Below threshold)
Eric:

Obama finally reads the Atlas while shrugging, but still doesn't see what the big deal is.

I knew she couldn't see Rus... (Below threshold)
Eric:

I knew she couldn't see Russia from her house. According to this map they are on opposite sides of the world. Stupid woman, it's good thing she didn't get elected.

Now where was I again? Oh yeah, trying to find that last State.

Dang! There's a LOT more th... (Below threshold)

Dang! There's a LOT more than 57 states.

55, 56, Dang, where is that... (Below threshold)
JustPlainBill:

55, 56, Dang, where is that 57th state?

Try as he might the 'Won' c... (Below threshold)
Gmac:

Try as he might the 'Won' could not find the X on the map that said "You are here"

"Hmmm...There's Kazakhstan.... (Below threshold)

"Hmmm...There's Kazakhstan. Kuwait, yeah. Kenya, of course, know that one. North Korea? C'mon, it's gotta be here somewhere. No, that's Kansas. C'mon...Liechtenstein, heh, that's funny to say...Liechtenstein, Liechtenstein. Oh well, how important can it be?"

Yep, 12 continents just lik... (Below threshold)
Mike M:

Yep, 12 continents just like I thought.

In furthering his aim towar... (Below threshold)
apb:

In furthering his aim toward global conquest, the Jug-eared Douche prepares to take a dump on the Great Seal...

"Hmmmmmm... where in the wo... (Below threshold)

"Hmmmmmm... where in the world is the fry that kill my fadder?"

Sorry I couldn't help myself.

uuuuuuuuuuugggghhhh! damn, ... (Below threshold)
Jason:

uuuuuuuuuuugggghhhh! damn, shouldn't have had that damn chili last night, whew! That's gonna be nasty, gonna have to courtsey wipe and cover that up so Rahm doesn't step in it.....MICHELLE, where's the constitution?

President Obama after scrat... (Below threshold)
Supertiny:

President Obama after scratching out "U.S.A" and scribbling in "The Land of Hopey, Changey, unicorns, and magical fairies".

"Hm. This still isn't as n... (Below threshold)
LaMedusa:

"Hm. This still isn't as nice as the one Michelle bought me at the flea market. They have the best ice cream there..."

"So let me get this right; ... (Below threshold)
Steve:

"So let me get this right; Sanford, the family man, cheated on his wife in most of these continents. He also left his kids alone on Father's Day. Yet, I'm a loving husband and devoted father and those gosh darn good ole Christians attack me? Oh yeah, we Dems don't have to worry about their party until 2044. Take that to the bank!"

Let's see ... first the Uni... (Below threshold)

Let's see ... first the United States, then ... .

RAHM! When did you say the ... (Below threshold)
IowaRight:

RAHM! When did you say the new "Picture Hanging Czar" would be here?

Hmm, now where are those ot... (Below threshold)
Kenobi:

Hmm, now where are those other 7 states, I could have sworn there were 57...

I thought I made the oceans... (Below threshold)
Brent T:

I thought I made the oceans blue.

Isreal is much too big.... (Below threshold)
Brent T:

Isreal is much too big.

Ego is to scale.... (Below threshold)
Brent T:

Ego is to scale.

Think Michelle would find o... (Below threshold)
Brent T:

Think Michelle would find out if I went to Argentina?

Just give me a minute . . .... (Below threshold)
Tom10000:

Just give me a minute . . . I'm sure that I can find the United States on this map.

Tim Kaine, where are you? ... (Below threshold)
Bill Ferguson:

Tim Kaine, where are you? I know you're out there somewhere!

"Hmmm...I thought the Earth... (Below threshold)

"Hmmm...I thought the Earth was supposed to be round??"

In a fine example of his mu... (Below threshold)

In a fine example of his multi-tasking skills, President Obama squats to pee as he searches for a country he hasn't already apologized to.

Hey, Michelle, I didn't kno... (Below threshold)
Bill Ferris:

Hey, Michelle, I didn't know the world was flat!

Obama checks out the upcomi... (Below threshold)
CDR M:

Obama checks out the upcoming fall board game by Milton Bradley called "Where in the World is Obama's Birth Certificate!"

Palau...no...Bermuda...no..... (Below threshold)
Josh:

Palau...no...Bermuda...no...I know! Britain sent their prisoners to Australia once! Should I tell the Queen first?

"There must be some country... (Below threshold)
Hodink:

"There must be some country 43 didn't threaten, intimidate or invade."

"...where the hell are thos... (Below threshold)
MichaelC:

"...where the hell are those states? I know there there's another 7 somewhere."

52....53.....54......55....... (Below threshold)

52....53.....54......55.......56........57. See there ARE 57 states.

Barry, believing he was in ... (Below threshold)
GarandFan:

Barry, believing he was in the bathroom, takes a shit on the Great Seal of the United States.

I love these "Find your Bir... (Below threshold)
MichaelR:

I love these "Find your Birth Place" puzzles! Now where is Kenya......

I don't care. This is how w... (Below threshold)
Trajan:

I don't care. This is how we do it in Kenya.
Rahm.....pass the T.P.

"4...3...2..1...Ready or no... (Below threshold)
Trajan:

"4...3...2..1...Ready or not here I come! (This'll be easy. Gibbs always hides in the
Lewinski bathroom and Rahm's under the sofa
cushions...I heard him giggle)"

"I wonder if Zbiggy will au... (Below threshold)
LaMedusa:

"I wonder if Zbiggy will autograph this for me. *Sigh* It would mean so much..."

President Obama searches fo... (Below threshold)
NGrove:

President Obama searches for those missing states...

It's just not fair. Americ... (Below threshold)
Baron Von Ottomatic:

It's just not fair. America is so comparatively small - yet we produce and consume one quarter of the global economy every year. Well not on my watch!

And to think that idiot Bus... (Below threshold)
Baron Von Ottomatic:

And to think that idiot Bush had this map hanging on the wall at eye level...

Barrack was stunned. Strain... (Below threshold)
Baron Von Ottomatic:

Barrack was stunned. Strain as he may a beam of sunlight wasn't shining across the Great Seal.

"President Barack Hussein O... (Below threshold)
sanssoucy:

"President Barack Hussein Obama struggles to recall which country - exactly - he's the president of.

In vain."

Now let me see if I can fin... (Below threshold)
marie:

Now let me see if I can find Kenya on the map...

See, I told you it was flat... (Below threshold)
SilverSeaOtter:

See, I told you it was flat!

Obama says his daily prayer... (Below threshold)
retired military:

Obama says his daily prayers facing Mecca.

I thought the earth was blu... (Below threshold)
brad:

I thought the earth was blue?

Just like chimps in the zoo... (Below threshold)
Gmac:

Just like chimps in the zoo would, Barry had trouble comprehending what he was looking at.

Lost and afraid to ask for ... (Below threshold)
Ken Hahn:

Lost and afraid to ask for directions, Obama studies an unfamiliar map.

President Obama instinctive... (Below threshold)

President Obama instinctively begins to sing while looking at his new map.

"Imagine there's no countries
It isn't hard to do...
Imagine no possessions
I wonder if you can
No need for greed or hunger
A brotherhood of man
Imagine all the people
Sharing all the world..."

Monopoly for despots.... (Below threshold)
xiphos:

Monopoly for despots.

"This'll really polish my f... (Below threshold)
Staylor:

"This'll really polish my foreign policy creds."

One of the American chicken... (Below threshold)
Jeff Blogworthy:

One of the American chickens coming home to roost.

How do I switch this thing ... (Below threshold)

How do I switch this thing to MSNBC?

Where in the world is Matt ... (Below threshold)
Maggie Mama:

Where in the world is Matt Lauer? It's his turn to kiss my a$$ this week!

B.O.- Here, let me show you... (Below threshold)
24usmcr:

B.O.- Here, let me show you. My brother George lives riiiiight here...

Obama practices squatting f... (Below threshold)
Spike:

Obama practices squatting for dinner in anticipation of a state visit to North Vietnam where he will apologize for the Vietnam War.

"If we put this on a turnta... (Below threshold)
MagicalPat:

"If we put this on a turntable, then the world would truly revolve around me."

"If I could just find Const... (Below threshold)
Mark W:

"If I could just find Constantinople I could make a speech there apologizing to the Persians for American involvement in the Roman empire. Those Romans would never have had slaves either if it hadn't been for America."

"Suckers!"... (Below threshold)
Spike:

"Suckers!"

I'm not sure whether my nex... (Below threshold)
Dr. B. R. Lang:

I'm not sure whether my next office should be in Brussels, or in Mecca ... maybe Medina.

I know, Jerusalem would be perfect!

There's Hawaii, there's Ken... (Below threshold)
Knightbrigade:

There's Hawaii, there's Kenya.
hmmmm.. If I squint, they look just the same... hee heee

Waldo? Hey, Waldo, where ar... (Below threshold)
Steven Price:

Waldo? Hey, Waldo, where are you?

I know Iran is on here some... (Below threshold)
Doug:

I know Iran is on here somewhere.

"Obama takes us all with... (Below threshold)
914:

"Obama takes us all with down His road map to Hell!!"

Edit for #14:High ... (Below threshold)
Eric:

Edit for #14:

High Risk: The Barack Obama Edition - The Game of World Domination where there are no armies and the rules of the game consist of negotiations or strongly worded letters of condemnation.

"Well what does this say ab... (Below threshold)

"Well what does this say about North Korea? ...Here there be dragons...Hmmm, well that can't be good."

The Game Of Risk... (Below threshold)
Faith+1:

The Game Of Risk

Squatters rights do not app... (Below threshold)
914:

Squatters rights do not apply.

"There's 50 states.... now ... (Below threshold)

"There's 50 states.... now what were the other states Joe told me to look for?.... Oh Yeah, Despair, Confusion, Disarray, Hopelessness, Incompentence, Stupor and Ignorance."

Sorry, I just can't see a 3... (Below threshold)

Sorry, I just can't see a 3-D bunny.

Hmmm. I can't find West Xyl... (Below threshold)

Hmmm. I can't find West Xylophone anywhere...

Boy, do I miss my African M... (Below threshold)

Boy, do I miss my African Muslim homeland!

I swore I would take a crap... (Below threshold)

I swore I would take a crap in the middle of the Oval Office, and by Allah, I'm going to do it!

"Uh... shoon't my name be l... (Below threshold)

"Uh... shoon't my name be listed under LEGEND?"

While staring at the map of... (Below threshold)
Eric:

While staring at the map of Iran the President screams, "MADNESS? This is Obama."

Obama demonstrates once aga... (Below threshold)

Obama demonstrates once again that he can't find his ass with both hands... and his ass.

"I can't find a fire swamp.... (Below threshold)

"I can't find a fire swamp... so I guess ROUS don't really exist."

"Today, the US Tomor... (Below threshold)
sarahconnor2:

"Today, the US
Tomorrow, Die Welt!!"

Clinton left a stain here t... (Below threshold)
Bill M:

Clinton left a stain here too?

He stoops to conquer.... (Below threshold)
Nylda:

He stoops to conquer.

"I did it honey!!!!! ... (Below threshold)
914:

"I did it honey!!!!! My dart landed right on the mount of olives!"

"...The same thing we do ev... (Below threshold)

"...The same thing we do every night, Pinky..."

Theres a bad moon o... (Below threshold)
914:

Theres a bad moon on the rise.

Great Seal " I see You on t... (Below threshold)
914:

Great Seal " I see You on the darkside of the Moon."

Iran, Cuba, Venezuela, thes... (Below threshold)
guido:

Iran, Cuba, Venezuela, these countries are tiny compared to the Soviet Union. They don't pose a serious threat to us the way the Soviet Union posed a threat to us.

Well I'll be darned, Joe Bi... (Below threshold)
guido:

Well I'll be darned, Joe Biden was right! There actually IS a country called Rand McNally.

Okay...where is the US agai... (Below threshold)
tacorbo:

Okay...where is the US again...

I dunno, I keep getting 57?... (Below threshold)
Monterrey Jim:

I dunno, I keep getting 57?

"Ok, now what countries are... (Below threshold)

"Ok, now what countries are on the other side?"

Update: <... (Below threshold)
Kevin Author Profile Page:

Update: Winners announced. Click the link to read the winning entries. The contest is now closed.




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