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Wizbang Weekend Caption Contest™

It's Friday, which means it's time for the Wizbang Weekend Caption Contest™. Enter your best caption for the following picture:


US President Barack Obama (R) and Vice President Joe Biden (L) speak during a town hall meeting at the University of Tampa in Tampa, Florida. Obama Thursday rekindled the 'Yes We Can' mood of his 2008 campaign, vowing not to shirk from the 'tough stuff' after his reform plans ground to a near halt in Congress. (AFP/Jim Watson)


Winners will be announced Monday morning.


Update: Winners announced. Click the link to read the winning entries. The contest is now closed.


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Comments (149)

"If he says he would tell h... (Below threshold)

"If he says he would tell his family not to fly on airplanes while I'm in charge of national security I'm gonna have to slug him."

"Ditto!"... (Below threshold)

"Ditto!"

Dumb and Dumber... (Below threshold)

Dumb and Dumber

"OK... OK.... you're right.... (Below threshold)

"OK... OK.... you're right... readin' off a teleprompter ain't that easy."

You're doing it all wrong.<... (Below threshold)
Gmac:

You're doing it all wrong.

Expressing displeasure with... (Below threshold)
iwogisdead:

Expressing displeasure with a recent Supreme Court decision, Vice President Joe Biden issues a challenge to meet all nine justices in the UFC Octagon in a winner-take-all showdown.

F-f-f-f ive hundred. Do I h... (Below threshold)

F-f-f-f ive hundred. Do I hear six?

Karaoke night was abruptly ... (Below threshold)
Rick13:

Karaoke night was abruptly cancelled after Joe Biden tried in vain to get the President to sing a duet of "Ebony and Ivory".

Obama is so desperate, he's... (Below threshold)
fustian:

Obama is so desperate, he's starting to listen to Biden...

All you need to know about ... (Below threshold)
fustian:

All you need to know about Obama is that he thought Biden was some kind of foreign policy expert.

"The solution is a three le... (Below threshold)
Spike:

"The solution is a three letter word: J - O - B - S"!

"I introduce to you a light... (Below threshold)
Spike:

"I introduce to you a light-skinned, clean, articulate black man, who speaks with with no Negro dialect (except when he wants to)....Barack Hussein OBAMA!"

I say we nuke Massachusetts... (Below threshold)
fustian:

I say we nuke Massachusetts!

Barack, I may not have the ... (Below threshold)
fustian:

Barack, I may not have the sense God gave an in-grown lychee nut, but at least you don't see me pissin' off the Supreme Court.

What were you thinkin' man?

And I'll tell you another t... (Below threshold)
IowaRight:

And I'll tell you another thing about this man, He DOES NOT QUIT...except Afghanistan, Gitmo, the War on Terror, and capitalism...

With his teleprompter broke... (Below threshold)
fustian:

With his teleprompter broken, Obama had no choice but to let Biden speak...

I've got Spirit yes I do, I... (Below threshold)
IowaRight:

I've got Spirit yes I do, I've got Spirit, how 'bout you!

Barry guess of the Deficit ... (Below threshold)
John Sheehan:

Barry guess of the Deficit Prize package is $8 Gazillion....remember your guess cannot be over here on The Price is Right........

Ya head down K street, go a... (Below threshold)
Pretzel Logic:

Ya head down K street, go about two blocks, turn right at the Starbucks....

I wouldn't pull my finger i... (Below threshold)
Pretzel Logic:

I wouldn't pull my finger if I were you.

Obama thought bubble: "In ... (Below threshold)
Steve:

Obama thought bubble: "In retrospect, why didn't I go with John Edwards?"

"And the next time one of y... (Below threshold)
Upset Old Guy:

"And the next time one of you ninnies laughs or farts while this man is talking I'm coming up there to kick some serious butt."

Look Barry, I told you alre... (Below threshold)
Jim:

Look Barry, I told you already, there will be NO new coal or nuclear facilities in the US. Don't make me tell you again!

Who's bright idea was it to... (Below threshold)
fustian:

Who's bright idea was it to put these two in charge of a national economy?

Slow Joe: "I'm starting to ... (Below threshold)
JAT:

Slow Joe: "I'm starting to hear word on the streets that you are more stupid than I am. Takes the heat off me!"

If they say "You Lie" you s... (Below threshold)
Pretzel Logic:

If they say "You Lie" you say "You Suck". If they mouth something to you, you get in their face. If they bring a knife, we bring a gun.

"This one time, at band cam... (Below threshold)
Pretzel Logic:

"This one time, at band camp..."

Barack, go take a cigarette... (Below threshold)
fustian:

Barack, go take a cigarette break, then come back here and tell us about health care.

"Anyway, so the Rabbi says ... (Below threshold)
Pretzel Logic:

"Anyway, so the Rabbi says to the Mexican..."

You can tell Obama's thrown... (Below threshold)
fustian:

You can tell Obama's thrown in the towel when he lets Biden speak.

"Look, if you dont let me t... (Below threshold)
geo Author Profile Page:

"Look, if you dont let me talk, how are people gonna know you are the smart one?"

...and so I tell the lady, ... (Below threshold)
IowaRight:

...and so I tell the lady, I am the Vice President of the United States, she laughs and says that she is the Queen of England, but I still need the ticket to get my laundry, so I say...

Where's Simon Cowell when w... (Below threshold)
jim2:

Where's Simon Cowell when we need him?

"OK, so maybe I was wrong a... (Below threshold)
zipity:

"OK, so maybe I was wrong about the "clean" part, after seeing him not wash his hands after using the restroom, but the part about him being "articulate"? Oh hell....obviously I was just talking out my ass......"

They knew they didn't have ... (Below threshold)

They knew they didn't have a chance until the show was renamed "American Idiot."

"Really, ladies and gentlem... (Below threshold)
WildWillie:

"Really, ladies and gentleman, he does smell clean". ww

I can say "I" more than you... (Below threshold)
Joe:

I can say "I" more than you can Barack.

"I give you our President, ... (Below threshold)
Mark L:

"I give you our President, who will give a speech that is so compelling that this time not only will Chris Matthews forget that he is black, but so will Keith Olberman and Rachel Maddow."

I would prefer to be a two-... (Below threshold)
Joe:

I would prefer to be a two-term bad Vice President Barack.

"Hillary didn't come to the... (Below threshold)
Lindy R. Dole:

"Hillary didn't come to the SOTU address... so I say the Bitch must die."

"If he would just shut up I... (Below threshold)

"If he would just shut up I'd spring for a new set of plugs."

Obama: "Why oh why didn't I... (Below threshold)
vader06:

Obama: "Why oh why didn't I take the blue pill ???"

Chris Mathews is so right. ... (Below threshold)
Jeff Blogworthy:

Chris Mathews is so right. In this light, if I squint just right, I can almost forget you are black.

Oboma thought bubble: "Sure... (Below threshold)
Neoluddite:

Oboma thought bubble: "Sure, life insurance is important, but the cost!"

I got this Mr. Microphone f... (Below threshold)
Joe Miller:

I got this Mr. Microphone for Christmas! Listen to "New York, New York!"

Post-sentient America.... (Below threshold)
Jeff Blogworthy:

Post-sentient America.

I love you,You love ... (Below threshold)
Jeff Blogworthy:

I love you,
You love me,
We're a happy family...

2 idiots, no red tie, have ... (Below threshold)
914:

2 idiots, no red tie, have microphone, were in debt.

I swear it boss, every time... (Below threshold)
IowaRight:

I swear it boss, every time Pelosi jumped to her feet to clap, she farted! EVERY DAMN TIME!

Biden thought bubble "He li... (Below threshold)

Biden thought bubble "He listens so well for a black man"

Obama thought bubble "wonder what my teleprompter will tell me to say about his speech?"

Behind the curtain thought bubble "these idiots are so easy to control"

Obama: I thought I was gett... (Below threshold)
mpw280:

Obama: I thought I was getting a foreign policy wonk not a fu#$ing dork. mpw

Damn it Obama, get your han... (Below threshold)
cathymv:

Damn it Obama, get your hand out of my ass! I keep telling you - I am not Walter!!!


see ya
cathy :)

~ Wont ya take Me too... (Below threshold)
914:

~ Wont ya take Me too
shanty town

Introduce Me too
Mister brown

So squeeky clean
He's a pro

Dont ask Me why
Im just joe

~Interlude~

Confine us to a
shanty town

Asshats for life
black or brown

Join us in our
shanty town

We'll make America a
shanty town~

"A love shack is a little o... (Below threshold)
914:

"A love shack is a little ol' place where We screw up together, love shack Bambiiiiii"

~Put Your head on My should... (Below threshold)
914:

~Put Your head on My shoulders

Whisper in My big ears, Joey

Lies I long to hear, tell Me

That Your still in love with Me

Put Your lips next to mine~

err.. Forget the rest of that verse..

" Dammitt!! When I say I wa... (Below threshold)
914:

" Dammitt!! When I say I want jobs created everywhere but America! You better damn well know I mean it!!!"

Thirty minutes ago Obama ga... (Below threshold)
john1v6:

Thirty minutes ago Obama gave Biden the microphone and said, "Check this and make sure it's on. All you have to do is say, 'Testing...1...2...3.'"

A candid moment brought to ... (Below threshold)
914:

A candid moment brought to You in living color by Faux News:

"Is it true Saul,that once You go black You never catch a break"

"Er...ah..um....era...W..uhh.......mmmm, mmmm, mmmm... Load the Damned prompter already!"

Flag this message--You"re a... (Below threshold)
914:

Flag this message--You"re approved- !Financial Aid Available--Friday, January 29, 2010 9:19 AMFrom: "-- -FAFSA- --" Add sender to ContactsTo:

That was quick? You got My vote Barry!

In Obamas mind: He's been ... (Below threshold)
Jeff:

In Obamas mind: He's been hold that um for about a minute now. Maybe he had a stroke, please god let that be it.

I hear some people mistake ... (Below threshold)
BluesHarper:

I hear some people mistake me for a dummy!

Our next lot is a tarnished... (Below threshold)
Burke:

Our next lot is a tarnished US President. He has low poll ratings, is clean and articulate and will provide hours of relief from white guilt. Opening bids please...

Biden - "And our policies w... (Below threshold)
_Mike_:

Biden - "And our policies will help grow the government and expand unemployment.."

Obama - "*Gulp* Who gave Joe the mic?"

American Idle... (Below threshold)
Brad:

American Idle

Any goofball who wears a pu... (Below threshold)
SILVER BULLET:

Any goofball who wears a purple tie should be required to eat a microphone!

For his next trick, The Oba... (Below threshold)
GarandFan:

For his next trick, The Obamassiah will make $2.4 TRILLION dollars disappear before your very eyes, WHILE AT THE SAME TIME INVOKING A SPENDING FREEZE! Prepare yourselves to be AMAZED!

AND NOW......HEEEEEEEEEEEEE... (Below threshold)
GarandFan:

AND NOW......HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEERE'S Barry!

And when I die, and you bec... (Below threshold)
Son of a Pig and a Monkey:

And when I die, and you become President...er, what,...I'm not the President?

Oh, screw it; we're going s... (Below threshold)

Oh, screw it; we're going straight for Stimulus 3!

"The President has asked me... (Below threshold)

"The President has asked me to come up and give you all some very intelligent reasons why you wouldn't want to impeach him, and all I want to say is..."

"Thank you, Joe, that should do the trick."

Jimmy Carter II and Dan Qua... (Below threshold)

Jimmy Carter II and Dan Quayle II.

"I know, Eminem, and you, s... (Below threshold)

"I know, Eminem, and you, sir, are no Eminem."

"Okay, Barack, check it out... (Below threshold)

"Okay, Barack, check it out. Guess who I am? I'm Reverend Flagler!

"Side by side on my paino k... (Below threshold)

"Side by side on my paino keyboard, oh lord, why do weeeeee.....now you, Barack!....Barack? Come on, I know you feel it...."

Dumb and Dumber: The Mov... (Below threshold)
DJ Drummond:

Dumb and Dumber: The Movie
Dumb and Dumber: The Sitcom
Dumb and Dumber: The Administration

Biden: "Im tellin You Ba... (Below threshold)
914:

Biden: "Im tellin You Barry, We keep on tellin em' the economys growing and jobs are being created and by spring they'll be so buried in shit they wont even notice We did it to em'!"

Who knew an albatross could... (Below threshold)
SCSIwuzzy:

Who knew an albatross could be so loud?

Obama thought bubble: "Yup,... (Below threshold)
P. Bunyan:

Obama thought bubble: "Yup, they were right. This fucking idiot is the best assassination insurance in the world."

For Obama's next trick, HE ... (Below threshold)
GarandFan:

For Obama's next trick, HE will WALK ON WATER, without a jacket! Let's hear it for The Won!

"I'll be loving you, always... (Below threshold)
GarandFan:

"I'll be loving you, always........"

We're not afraid to appear ... (Below threshold)
GarandFan:

We're not afraid to appear together. The Secret Service agents are all wearing sign-boards that say "So you want President PELOSI?"

Biden: "You may think Tige... (Below threshold)
P. Bunyan:

Biden: "You may think Tiger Woods is a half black man who's screwed a lot of people, but right here folks, we have a half black man who's screwing hundreds of millions of people!"

Neither of us are ready for... (Below threshold)
RadiCalMan:

Neither of us are ready for prime time.

From one empty suit to anot... (Below threshold)
914:

From one empty suit to another: The future is Splenda! Yes the future is Splenda!

In an effort to outdo Jeff ... (Below threshold)
Weegie:

In an effort to outdo Jeff Dunham, President Obama makes Walter talk and move without a hand up his butt.

He is also said to be practicing on a routine with Janet Napolapeño on a Stick.

Keeping with tradition, Oba... (Below threshold)
Dodo David:

Keeping with tradition, Obama uses a dummy for his ventriloquist act.

I'm practicing my '800 poun... (Below threshold)
bigbugna:

I'm practicing my '800 pound gorilla in the room' speech. Listen to this!!!

"Gird your loins, this man ... (Below threshold)
jbw:

"Gird your loins, this man smells as sweet as a summer ham"

Together We cant!!!<... (Below threshold)
914:

Together We cant!!!

......and then the Priest a... (Below threshold)
Wiglaf:

......and then the Priest asks the Rabbi- where's a cop when you need one.

See Mr. President, that's how you do it without a teleprompter

6 pac puggs: "Im demanding ... (Below threshold)
914:

6 pac puggs: "Im demanding Matthews be brought down here and shine Your shoe's right now! Just to prove I've gotten over all the racist bigotry that clouds Your past O' Great One!"

He's waving that finger jus... (Below threshold)
914:

He's waving that finger just like Bill!! "I knew You'se people would never amount to diddly squat!"

"For his next trick, The... (Below threshold)
914:

"For his next trick, The Obamassiah will make $2.4 TRILLION dollars disappear before your very eyes"

Ha ha ha ha

And for his next trick, He will make it reappear in an offshore account under the name of "The One"!!

{WTF? Why? Why did I chose ... (Below threshold)
Maggie Mama:

{WTF? Why? Why did I chose Biden? What was I thinking?}

{Please tell me that he didn't just say I was speaking in my "cracker" dialect?}

Biden: "And just in case you don't thinking Obama is working for you, just check out his rolled up shirt sleeves."

Biden: "If you'll all remember, I warned America that Obama would face an international crisis within his first six months. Don't say we weren't doing anything right cause the underwear bomber didn't come until the end of the year."

Biden: "Unlike those rowdy tea-baggers, I'm no racist as you can tell by my Color of Purple tie."

Biden sings Acapella, "The ... (Below threshold)
Robert L:

Biden sings Acapella, "The Lion Sleeps Tonignt"

I told you before .. I want... (Below threshold)
Neo:

I told you before .. I want my coffee with just sugar

Hey-oooooo! How hot was it?... (Below threshold)

Hey-oooooo! How hot was it?

(With apologies to Ed McMahon)

"Were losers but somebody b... (Below threshold)
914:

"Were losers but somebody besides us is a Winner!"

Proof positive that even th... (Below threshold)
914:

Proof positive that even the dumbest among us can achieve....? Cluelessness?

Finally, someone further to... (Below threshold)
Faith+1:

Finally, someone further to the left than Obama.

Alex, my answer is: "What d... (Below threshold)
Faith+1:

Alex, my answer is: "What do you get with lots of money, low intelligence, little ability, a lot of hype and little substance?"

Obama, if I told you once, ... (Below threshold)
retired military:

Obama, if I told you once, I told you a thousand times, if you speak in Eubonics at the state of the union you will never get the republicans to go along with you.

Biden - Just because they s... (Below threshold)
retired military:

Biden - Just because they said you dont have to talk Negro if you dont need to doesnt mean to do it at the SOTU.

Biden - "You know, listenin... (Below threshold)
retired military:

Biden - "You know, listening to your SOTU, I almost forgot that you were black."

Oh why do I live this way? ... (Below threshold)
Faith+1:

Oh why do I live this way? (Hey, must be the money!)

Biden - "Go ahead, pull my ... (Below threshold)
retired military:

Biden - "Go ahead, pull my finger, I dare you"

Now! Let Me refresh your mi... (Below threshold)
914:

Now! Let Me refresh your mind Woodrow, there are many reason's they sent us here! First and foremost, to lose jobs. Grow government and administer our sickness to the poor..

The worst part is We believe they sent us here because We give a damn about them! The honest truth is, I dont give a dam about them! I give a damn about You and Your ordained "godhood", so let us dispense with all the chicanery and just say " Plow My field! I own You!"..

Obama - Joe, they mean you ... (Below threshold)
retired military:

Obama - Joe, they mean you when they say "Ugly American", not only am I pretty but I was born in Kenya.


I-I-I know what you're gonn... (Below threshold)
Baron Von Ottomatic:

I-I-I know what you're gonna say son. When two halves is gone there's nuthin' left - and you're right. Two nuthins is nuthin'. That's mathematics son. You can argue with me but you can't argue with figures. Two half nuthins is a whole nuthin'.

Was this photo taken during... (Below threshold)
914:

Was this photo taken during recess? Or in Chi chi's bedroom?

Joe's mad as hell and he ai... (Below threshold)
914:

Joe's mad as hell and he aint gonna fake it anymore!!

~Envy and bribery live toge... (Below threshold)
914:

~Envy and bribery live together in perfect harmony... Side by side on our pawned piano oh lord were so freee~

Hey Barry, pull my finger!<... (Below threshold)
Jim:

Hey Barry, pull my finger!

"My State Was A Slave State... (Below threshold)
Clancy:

"My State Was A Slave State"

Color Me blind! But did Joe... (Below threshold)
914:

Color Me blind! But did Joe just whistle dixie in the half blak dial up a negroid lexicon dunce in thugs face?

Dope and Strange... (Below threshold)

Dope and Strange

"Solutions? You move right ... (Below threshold)
Hodink:

"Solutions? You move right and then you move left. Right?"

I swear He looks like the g... (Below threshold)
914:

I swear He looks like the guy that pushed Me out of a snowbank one night 30 years ago! Of course he ended up pushing Me in the other side jacking My money and telling me You'll be alright this time!

Yeah, musta been Him. That's the only real job this clown ever had! Stic up in chief!

Trick questionHow ... (Below threshold)
914:

Trick question

How many idiots does it take too build a coalition of marxists?

Answer: 1

Let Me digress and refrain ... (Below threshold)
914:

Let Me digress and refrain from the established media..

How many marxists does it take to build a coalition of idiots?

Answer: Only one if He has the Presidency.

SEIU gave me the tie. You l... (Below threshold)
Lord Zoltar:

SEIU gave me the tie. You like it?

Do I hear $13 trillion? Thi... (Below threshold)
Lord Zoltar:

Do I hear $13 trillion? Thirteen trillion. Do I hear $14 trillion? $14.5 trillion. $14.5 trillion going once, twice, SOLD, to the American public.

Comedian Jeff Dunham was ac... (Below threshold)
retired military:

Comedian Jeff Dunham was accused of racism after putting on black face and giving his dummy a microphone.

The following picture was m... (Below threshold)
retired military:

The following picture was marked Exhibit A in the case the American People VS The Dumocrats. The subject of the equal opportunity case highlights the problems with racial quotas and hiring the handicapped for jobs they are not qualified for.

----------
PS. My sincere apologies to the handicapped in implying with the above statement that Biden is handicapped.

Forget Osama. Why aren't we... (Below threshold)
Vagabond:

Forget Osama. Why aren't we going after Achmed the Dead Terrorist?

"The big difference between... (Below threshold)
Spike:

"The big difference between you and I, Mr. President, is that I don't need a teleprompter to prove my ignorance; a microphone will do."

"So I said to him, 'Look be... (Below threshold)
Spike:

"So I said to him, 'Look behind you, Mr. Chief Justice, there's a hundred years of stare decisis behind you.'"

Caption: Really, hmmmm, te... (Below threshold)
Judith Hofbauer:

Caption: Really, hmmmm, tell me more.

Yeah, well I've seen you wi... (Below threshold)
twolaneflash:

Yeah, well I've seen you wing it without a teleprompter, too, and I'll tell you, Bub, it ain't pretty. Call me gafftastic again, I'll stick this microphone where your head is.

"DY - NO - MITE"... (Below threshold)

"DY - NO - MITE"

Caption: Really, h... (Below threshold)
Caption: Really, hmmmm, tell me more.
Are you infering Obama is a negatoid?
"...and the Republicans say... (Below threshold)
D. Dean:

"...and the Republicans saying that the healthcare plan has no merit is like saying the lunar landings weren't filmed in Nevada!"

"...and the Republicans say... (Below threshold)
D. Dean:

"...and the Republicans saying that the Health Care Plan has no merit is like saying the lunar landings weren't filmed in Nevada!"

Get the hell off my lawn!!!... (Below threshold)
Sputum:

Get the hell off my lawn!!! Oh, sorry boss, I didn't know it was you.

Obama - "Joe, did you ever ... (Below threshold)
retired military:

Obama - "Joe, did you ever hear that old adage. Say nothing and be thought a fool rather than open your mouth and remove all doubt."

".....and in this cawnah, f... (Below threshold)
Sir Toby Belch:

".....and in this cawnah, from the isle of Oahu, weighing in at 165 lbs., and fresh off
a loss to Congress in the Health Care Thrilla
is a leaner, meaner Barry "The Bomb"
Obaaaaaaammmmmma......Obaaaaaaammmmma!!!"

"What do you mean I can't s... (Below threshold)
Gmac:

"What do you mean I can't sell him?"

Uh,....what the hell did I ... (Below threshold)
olsoljer:

Uh,....what the hell did I just say??

Anus and Dandy... (Below threshold)

Anus and Dandy

Pants on the ground. Looki... (Below threshold)
twolaneflash:

Pants on the ground. Lookin' like a fool....

I'm way whiter than he is -... (Below threshold)
Pete:

I'm way whiter than he is - really!

(Obama thinking): "Wow... n... (Below threshold)

(Obama thinking): "Wow... nearly any George Bush quote sounds reasonable coming out of Biden's mouth."

"Once You sell out to Barac... (Below threshold)
914:

"Once You sell out to Barack You never go back!"

"Read My lips, no new jo... (Below threshold)
914:

"Read My lips, no new jobs!!"

Biden: "Did you hear the on... (Below threshold)
Maggie Mama:

Biden: "Did you hear the one about the Republican Senator from Massachusetts and ....... "

"Ebony and bribery the reun... (Below threshold)
914:

"Ebony and bribery the reunion tour, together there's nothing We cant screw up.."

Ladies and gentlemen.....ou... (Below threshold)
Sir Toby Belch:

Ladies and gentlemen.....our contestant here
here needs "Health Care Reform" .......and
he's choosing Curtain #3! Let's all go over
now and see what he's won!

"He said 'the Sheriff is a-... (Below threshold)

"He said 'the Sheriff is a-near!'"

Update: <... (Below threshold)
Kevin Author Profile Page:

Update: Winners announced. Click the link to read the winning entries. The contest is now closed.




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