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Wizbang Weekend Caption Contest™

It's Friday, which means it's time for the Wizbang Weekend Caption Contest™. Enter your best caption for the following picture:


President Barack Obama meets with Homeland Security Secretary Janet Napolitano and senior administration officials, including National Security Advisor Gen. James Jones, left, in the Oval Office, regarding the situation in the Gulf of Mexico, April 29, 2010. (Official White House Photo by Pete Souza)


Winners will be announced Monday morning.


Update: Winners announced. Click the link to read the winning entries. The contest is now closed.


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Comments (130)

...and you can see how the ... (Below threshold)
Timmer:

...and you can see how the blue matches both your tie and almost matches his shirt, showing that you're both on the same page...get it...it's symbolic.

See how we matched the powe... (Below threshold)
Jeff:

See how we matched the powerpoint background color to your tie as you requested.

Yes, Sir, Homeland Security... (Below threshold)
tomg51:

Yes, Sir, Homeland Security really is part of your job. I'll explain with these pictures.

Nine days later, as the oil... (Below threshold)
IowaRight:

Nine days later, as the oil slick reaches shore, they have a meeting. "Heckuva Job Obamie"

"Gee, Ms. Napolitano, what ... (Below threshold)
JPO:

"Gee, Ms. Napolitano, what are we doing today?"

"What we try to do every day."

"What's that Ms. Napolitano?"

"Try to take over the world!"

"Narf!"

"How many of the 57 states ... (Below threshold)
Pretzel Logic:

"How many of the 57 states are we talking about?"

"We'll start with this and ... (Below threshold)
zipity:

"We'll start with this and work our way up to the more challenging works by Dr. Seuss....."

... we're putting in the SW... (Below threshold)
Paula:

... we're putting in the SWAT team here and the Vice Squad will enter here... And over here you'll notice the Truant Officers inspecting the wellheads...

Yes Mr. President, that wid... (Below threshold)
IowaRight:

Yes Mr. President, that wide open space in the middle is where our people will Photoshop in the zodiac full of Tea Partiers with the explosives...

"You see, if we remove the ... (Below threshold)
zipity:

"You see, if we remove the border guards and the fences, we can guarantee at least 3-5 million more new illegal Democratic voters for the next election. Our comrades at ACORN have assured us they can handle the volume of bogus voter registrations"

Even with the extra large c... (Below threshold)
Pretzel Logic:

Even with the extra large cards, UNO was still perplexing to the president.

"Does this red jacket make ... (Below threshold)
Pretzel Logic:

"Does this red jacket make me look like Frank Luntz?"

Obama holding fast to the l... (Below threshold)
Paul:

Obama holding fast to the liberal policy that mechanical failure -like terrorism- is a law enforcement issue.

So with this thing called P... (Below threshold)
GoWIld00:

So with this thing called Photoshop, we can make all of America into a blue state. Pretty cool, eh?

If you enlarge the picture,... (Below threshold)
IowaRight:

If you enlarge the picture, I swear, you can see a tear in Lincoln's eye...

Lincoln weeps.... (Below threshold)
Jeff Blogworthy:

Lincoln weeps.

"Look, see that entry, I ca... (Below threshold)
geo Author Profile Page:

"Look, see that entry, I can make another $30,000 before I hit the cap you set for having enough money."

Gen. Jones thinking: "I'm s... (Below threshold)
JAT0:

Gen. Jones thinking: "I'm sure Scott Adams gets inspiration for Dilbert after watching these two clowns."

Have you heard this one? A ... (Below threshold)
Jeff Medcalf:

Have you heard this one? A mulatto, a woman and an anti-semite walk into the Oval Office...

Actually Lincoln is probabl... (Below threshold)
Jeff Blogworthy:

Actually Lincoln is probably applauding. Like himself, Obama is using half the country to rape, pillage, and plunder the other half for a stronger central government.

Janet these are great budge... (Below threshold)
JAT0:

Janet these are great budget number for HHS, but let's bump it up a few more billion. Heck we're not paying for this - I'll just raise taxes.

Focus Mr. President - we're... (Below threshold)
JAT0:

Focus Mr. President - we're still on page one of my report.

"This is the cover sheet fo... (Below threshold)
Big Mo:

"This is the cover sheet for my proposals on the Teabaggers, Mr. President. Inside...well, there's actually nothing inside. Just wave it around like MacArthy did on TV and you'll be golden to the press once more."

"Yes, Mr. President, it ... (Below threshold)
DJ Drummond:

"Yes, Mr. President, it IS close to Texas. Therefore, we concur that you should blame the explosion and spill on George W. Bush."

"Border Protection for Dumm... (Below threshold)

"Border Protection for Dummies"...Don't these usually come with a yellow cover?

So when do we get to the pi... (Below threshold)
Eric:

So when do we get to the pictures of me?

Sing along children, ... (Below threshold)

Sing along children,
One of these people just doesn't belong,
One of these people is not like the others.
Can you tell which person is not like the others
By the time I finish my song?

Did you guess which person was not like the others?
Did you guess which person just doesn't belong?
If you guessed the white man is not like the others,
Then you're absolutely...right!


"Mr. President every copy c... (Below threshold)
recovered liberal democrat:

"Mr. President every copy comes with a free box of crayons".

Wait - go back to that firs... (Below threshold)
JAT0:

Wait - go back to that first part again. You mean we could waterboard those Tea Party leaders and get away with it?

Napolitano: You see Mr. Pre... (Below threshold)
Conservachef:

Napolitano: You see Mr. President, if you sign up just 4 people under you, and they sell just $100 of Amway products, and then they recruit just 4 people under them, then the national debt will be gone before you know it! Should I sign you up?

Obama: Present!

The Homeland Security team ... (Below threshold)
Stan:

The Homeland Security team viewing the daily porn updates that was sent over from the SEC.

Mr. President, every proble... (Below threshold)
Brian Wohlgemuth:

Mr. President, every problem we face can be solved with these two PowerPoint slides. The only thing standing in our way is that pesky constitution...

Why is it that every Democr... (Below threshold)
Jeff Blogworthy:

Why is it that every Democrat administration has its very own Androgynous Pat?

Janet, Powerpoint slides ar... (Below threshold)
Mikey60:

Janet, Powerpoint slides are NOT going to help General Jones come up with better material. I think he should go with the fart jokes....those always get a laugh.

No, Mr. President, if you t... (Below threshold)

No, Mr. President, if you tilt the photo to the left the oil DOESN'T roll back out to sea...

Yes, Mr. President, as you ... (Below threshold)
Maggie Mama:

Yes, Mr. President, as you ordered I've got several drones watching every move Governor Brewer makes.

Obama: "No, of course I'm ... (Below threshold)
P. Bunyan:

Obama: "No, of course I'm not gonna read this. If Soros says I'm for it then I'm for it. Thinking and making decisions is above my pay grade."

Arizona is down there, Mr. ... (Below threshold)
Hank:

Arizona is down there, Mr. President

I'm telling you, that joke ... (Below threshold)
Anon Y. Mous:

I'm telling you, that joke was funny! Here, check page 3 of my report where I explain the part about Jewish storeowners...

No, Mr. President, we can't... (Below threshold)
Maggie Mama:

No, Mr. President, we can't blame the Mayor of New Orleans because he's a Democrat. But you can always throw Bobby Jindal under the bus.

No sir, It's Gulf, not golf... (Below threshold)
Hank:

No sir, It's Gulf, not golf of Mexico.

Obama: "Man this is hard to... (Below threshold)

Obama: "Man this is hard to understand... you gotta TOTUS version?"
General Jones: "You're just suffering a Napolitano complex... report"

Napolitano: "Please stop ca... (Below threshold)

Napolitano: "Please stop calling me Clifford Mr. President."
General: "woof..."

1.Good news, ... (Below threshold)
Sadie:


1.
Good news, mein President, we've recovered the blue prints from the bunker.
2.
Ghost of Lincoln speaks: "I said free the slaves, not enslave the Republic"

Napolitano: Mr. President, ... (Below threshold)
Conservachef:

Napolitano: Mr. President, we have three options for dealing with people who have "made enough money." All you have to do is pick one.

Obama: Do I have to read them?

Napolitano: Well...

Obama: I was elected to Lead... Not to Read!

See? We secure the Mexican ... (Below threshold)
tomg51:

See? We secure the Mexican border at Guatemala and Belize - its a much shorter fence.

Or, if you're feeling audacious, and aren't you always, secure the border at Panama / Columbia and we get up to 57 states, a 20 mile border, and the communist party on the ballot to boot!

"I realize it's a very good... (Below threshold)
Upset Old Guy:

"I realize it's a very good image Mr. President, but it is just photo-recon image printed on a piece of paper. This is not one of those cool new iPads."

Napoliatano "Mr President, ... (Below threshold)
retired military:

Napoliatano "Mr President, here is our plan for taking the money from those who make more than you do."

Napolitano - "And Gen Jones... (Below threshold)
retired military:

Napolitano - "And Gen Jones suggested putting snipers here, here, and here, to take out the teabaggers"

Napolitano - "Gen JOnes sug... (Below threshold)
retired military:

Napolitano - "Gen JOnes suggests placing snipers here, here and here to take out the teabaggers"

Napolitano: "As you can see... (Below threshold)
guido:

Napolitano: "As you can see, Mr. President, this is a serious 'man-caused disaster'."
Obama: "You mean to tell me that this is a 'terrorist attack'?"
Napolitano: "No, no, Mr. President, I mean that this is, how should I say it?, 'an accident, not an attack, that was caused by man that has resulted in a disaster'."
Obama: "Dang, I hate it when we get I tripped up by our own silly euphemisms."

Gen Jones - "Sir the milita... (Below threshold)
retired military:

Gen Jones - "Sir the military will never stand for cancelling the elections and declaring you Emporer for Life"

Napaliatano - "How do you know? It has never been tried before"

Obama - "The Arizona law is... (Below threshold)
retired military:

Obama - "The Arizona law is an outrage, stopping people just because they look foreign"

Napolitano - "You are right sir. Now here are the plans you approved for keeping white voters away from the polls in Nov."

Gen Jones - "sir we despera... (Below threshold)
retired military:

Gen Jones - "sir we desperately need to work on these plans to confront a nuclear Iran"

Obama - "This is such a nice blue. It matches my tie, dont you think Janet."

Napolitano - "Sir the plan ... (Below threshold)
retired military:

Napolitano - "Sir the plan you had to blow up the oil rig to stop the drilling was fantastic, it is working just the way you thought it would"

Napolliana: "How do we b... (Below threshold)
914:

Napolliana: "How do we blame Booosh for this?"

You see, Mr. President, we ... (Below threshold)
Rob:

You see, Mr. President, we modeled our report on your speeches -- looks good on the surface, full of words and says absolutely nothing. Except, of course, for blaming bush and calling Tea Partiers dangerous.

Gen Jones looks over at the... (Below threshold)
retired military:

Gen Jones looks over at the blue pill and the red pill and decides both are bad for America.

Sorry DJ, I posted before I... (Below threshold)
914:

Sorry DJ, I posted before I read them... I blame bush.

And right here is the part ... (Below threshold)
pibill:

And right here is the part where Pogo tells Porky, "We have met the enemy, and he is us".

Obama - "Gen Jones I am con... (Below threshold)
retired military:

Obama - "Gen Jones I am concerned, if we place too many swat team members on the oil platforms they may capsize"

Gen Jones - "We dont foresee that happening sir"

Barry- "Good job janet, the... (Below threshold)
914:

Barry- "Good job janet, the charges were planted perfectly. You make planet janet look like a piker."

(Obumble thinking): "This i... (Below threshold)

(Obumble thinking): "This is a disaster. Should never have put me with this woman. Whose idea was this? She's just a sort of bigoted woman..."

Obama: "I think I've finall... (Below threshold)

Obama: "I think I've finally got my mind around how to win in November, it's... Oh look. Shiny."

Lincoln disapproves of this... (Below threshold)
914:

Lincoln disapproves of this message!

Barry peruses the reverse s... (Below threshold)
914:

Barry peruses the reverse side of an ACORN coversheet.

"I declare Marshall Law for... (Below threshold)
914:

"I declare Marshall Law for all 57 states!"

"Mr. President, can we plea... (Below threshold)

"Mr. President, can we please take down the Lincoln portrait? Every time I see him up there I find it harder and harder to think we can fool all of the people all of the time as you claim!"

"Instead of a fence, Sir, w... (Below threshold)
Neoluddite:

"Instead of a fence, Sir, we'll station Jewish necktie merchants along the border with nearby, strategically placed Jewish restaurants."

"OK... We've opened the thi... (Below threshold)

"OK... We've opened the third envelope... What does it say to do?"
"It says, 'Prepare three envelopes....'"

Mr. President, now might be... (Below threshold)
Pretzel Logic:

Mr. President, now might be a good time to fulfill that campaign promise of lowering the seas.

Mr. President, please consi... (Below threshold)
CZ:

Mr. President, please consider this to be your own copy of "My Pet Goat".

Rest assured Mr. President,... (Below threshold)
Baron Von Ottomatic:

Rest assured Mr. President, we'll be expending every available resource to ensure your 2011 NCAA basketball bracket doesn't crap out in the second round.

Powerpoint is just a crutch... (Below threshold)
Baron Von Ottomatic:

Powerpoint is just a crutch for people who have difficulty presenting complex information extemporaneously, so have these transcribed to the teleprompter for my 3:00 presser.

As you can see Mr President... (Below threshold)
scotty:

As you can see Mr President the enemies list we have compiled has grown to several pages

Nappy headed hoes.... (Below threshold)
914:

Nappy headed hoes.

{Lincoln thought bubble} -<... (Below threshold)
scotty:

{Lincoln thought bubble} -

what a shithead.

so this plan will replace A... (Below threshold)

so this plan will replace Arizona with Puerto Rico and maintain the 57 state level we currently have, Mr. President

Something borrowed,somethin... (Below threshold)
just bob:

Something borrowed,something blue,all is old and nothing new.

Obama: "So, what am ... (Below threshold)

Obama: "So, what am I looking at here?"

Nathan Lane in drag: "A sheet of paper with a lot of blue ink all over it."

Obama - "General, we need a... (Below threshold)
retired military:

Obama - "General, we need a very serious situation and need to discuss the first use of nuclear weapons"

Jones - "You mean against Iran?'

Obama "Don't be ridiculous. Against the teabaggers!"

A lamp, a room, 52 books, a... (Below threshold)
914:

A lamp, a room, 52 books, a love seat, 2 spectators, a dictator full of incompetence.

Could be Cuba but its not.

Napolitano: "Yes, Mr Presi... (Below threshold)
itismedavid:

Napolitano: "Yes, Mr President, the Gulf still DOES look blue..."

Jones thought bubble: OK, how about this, a bedraggled oil platform worker wanders into a Jewish clothing shop in New Orleans...

Lincoln-"I freed t... (Below threshold)
914:

Lincoln-

"I freed them for this??"

Obama - "I dont understand ... (Below threshold)
retired military:

Obama - "I dont understand this part here Janet"

Napilitano - "You have the page upside down Mr President"

What has this to do with co... (Below threshold)
914:

What has this to do with community agitatin???

"Well, I say bet the farm o... (Below threshold)
Rachel Edith:

"Well, I say bet the farm on Line Of David in the Derby."

"Blue is a soothing color, ... (Below threshold)
GarandFan:

"Blue is a soothing color, and we do want to sooth people while we tell them we're not enforcing the southern border."

Mr. President, here are the... (Below threshold)
sarahconnor2:

Mr. President, here are the latest photos of the blue screen on your personal computer. Shall I call in the SWAT team to deal with it?

Hey Janet, is there anyway ... (Below threshold)
Stan:

Hey Janet, is there anyway we can blame George W Bush for the rig explosion that occurred last week?

Lets give that to Keith Overbite to spin, Mr President.

Damn! His ears really are t... (Below threshold)
914:

Damn! His ears really are that big!

"I was all for offshore dri... (Below threshold)
914:

"I was all for offshore drilling before I was against it!"

"Mr. president, this is the... (Below threshold)
Jim:

"Mr. president, this is the shade of blue we have strongly suggested that the Nobel committee wear as they give you the Nobel Prize again next year."

Obama - "Why did they use ... (Below threshold)
retired military:

Obama - "Why did they use blue paper on this report"

Janet - "That is a picture of the water sir"

The brightest bulb in the r... (Below threshold)
RAH:

The brightest bulb in the room is:

A) Wearing a red coat
B) Wearing a blue tie
C) Wearing a brown tie and looking confused as to why he is there, or
D) Sitting on the end table and looking like the Stanley Cup

If you answered D, you are a racist!!!

"Mr. President, If you'l;l ... (Below threshold)
Big Mo:

"Mr. President, If you'l;l just read --"

Obama: "I was elected to lead. Not to read."

Like Coowell!! Barry's taki... (Below threshold)
914:

Like Coowell!! Barry's taking remedial classes to learn how to speak without the aid of a prompter!

"And these are the pictures... (Below threshold)
SShiell:

"And these are the pictures Air Force One took on its flight over New York City!"

And, Mr. President, here's ... (Below threshold)
jim2:

And, Mr. President, here's how it will look on the teleprompters.

I see dead people... (Below threshold)
914:

I see dead people

There I was, Janet Reno's t... (Below threshold)
Matt:

There I was, Janet Reno's testicles in my hand...

Ive seen MENSA and brother,... (Below threshold)
914:

Ive seen MENSA and brother, this aint no MENSA

"Janet. How many times do I... (Below threshold)

"Janet. How many times do I have to tell you 'MAKE THE LOGO BIGGER?'"

Obama - "This bill is too t... (Below threshold)
Roger McGaugh:

Obama - "This bill is too thin, I need for it to be atleast 12 inches thick, make it happen."

Janet - "Sir, we are showin... (Below threshold)
retired military:

Janet - "Sir, we are showing that due to the new immigration law in Arizona, undocumented aliens are leaving the state"

Obama - "Think we could pass a national law like that against the GOP?"

"No, Mr. President, I know ... (Below threshold)
Jay Guevara:

"No, Mr. President, I know it's called the 'Gulf of Mexico,' but that still doesn't it make it their problem."

While that crone drones on,... (Below threshold)
Sputum:

While that crone drones on, I'll just take a moment and check my eyelids for cracks.

Those Earth Liberation Fron... (Below threshold)
Stan:

Those Earth Liberation Front guys did a bang up job on that drilling rig last week. We got our money's worth on that job.

Abraham Lincoln sits perfec... (Below threshold)
PapaWhisky:

Abraham Lincoln sits perfectly still, hoping the jokers in the room won't see him.

Gen Jones - "Mr President, ... (Below threshold)
retired military:

Gen Jones - "Mr President, I."

Obama - "That is King Obama to you "

Sorry Janet,but I have to a... (Below threshold)
Wiglaf:

Sorry Janet,but I have to ask each time.
Should I bow to it?

Mr. President...it's the color blue

This was BRITISH Petroleum,... (Below threshold)
fustian:

This was BRITISH Petroleum, you say?

Maybe we should have gotten them a better gift...

" stupidfest the series "</... (Below threshold)
914:

" stupidfest the series "

DO YOU have to have to have... (Below threshold)
914:

DO YOU have to have to have an IQ above 16 to attend here? No, not really.

Guy on the left: "What kin... (Below threshold)
Rick13:

Guy on the left: "What kind of a man wears a red sport coat to the White House?"

"Mr. President, we extracte... (Below threshold)
Maggie Mama:

"Mr. President, we extracted these still photographs of you and Vera from the hotel's video tape . . ."

BP says it isn't an ecologi... (Below threshold)
fustian:

BP says it isn't an ecological disaster.

They prefer to call it "change"...

After all Barack, they're j... (Below threshold)
fustian:

After all Barack, they're just doing to the Gulf of Mexico what you're doing to the whole country.

It's amazing, but since the... (Below threshold)
fustian:

It's amazing, but since they passed that immigration bill, none of that Gulf of Mexico oil spill is washing up on Arizona.

The new "E-ink" birth certi... (Below threshold)

The new "E-ink" birth certificates are subject to the "blue screen of death" as you can see, sir. But we're unsure if this is a bug or a feature.

"In the land of the b... (Below threshold)
Melek:

"In the land of the blind, the one-eyed man is king."


I wish you well :) Melek



"Competence, like truth, beauty and contact lenses, is in the eye of the beholder."
~ L. J. Peter

"I thought this would be a ... (Below threshold)
kenneyraisin:

"I thought this would be a pretty blue for your new palace bedroom but Hillary thinks a nice gold with red trim would look better.

You need to stop watching R... (Below threshold)
kenneyraisin:

You need to stop watching Rick Sanchez on CNN Mr. President. The oil spill is here in the Gulf of Mexico, not the Arctic Circle.

"OK, Here's our plan to rep... (Below threshold)

"OK, Here's our plan to replace all of this Week's National Enquirer with our own version."

Unfortunately Mr. President... (Below threshold)
Michael Hamm:

Unfortunately Mr. President, our report does confirm that everyone who voted for you was stupid.

We have no real plan for th... (Below threshold)
chsw:

We have no real plan for the oil spill but we have a PR campaign to blame it on Bush.

chsw

"Show me all the blueprints... (Below threshold)
The Aviator:

"Show me all the blueprints, show me all the blueprints, show me all the blueprints, show me all the blueprints... I wanna get this done right, so show me all the blueprints... Show me all the blueprints, show me all the blueprints, show me all the blueprints..."

Napilatano "Mr President, i... (Below threshold)
retired military:

Napilatano "Mr President, it is imperative you put in an appearance in the areas hit by the oil slicks"

Obama "But, but, I dont see any golf courses that I can play at that are close by."

"Don't listen to her, Barry... (Below threshold)
Hermoine:

"Don't listen to her, Barry. Nobody else does."

Update: <... (Below threshold)
Kevin Author Profile Page:

Update: Winners announced. Click the link to read the winning entries. The contest is now closed.




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