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Wizbang Weekend Caption Contest™

It's Friday, which means it's time for the Wizbang Weekend Caption Contest™. Enter your best caption for the following picture:


Senators want WikiLeaks excluded from shield law


Winners will be announced Monday morning.

Update: Winners announced. Click the link to read the winning entries. The contest is now closed.


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Comments (94)

"Senator Schumer... how do ... (Below threshold)

"Senator Schumer... how do you propose to stop Wikileaks?"
"Eh... Depends... but that's not important now."

The decorum of the Kagan vo... (Below threshold)

The decorum of the Kagan vote to SCOTUS was only slightly marred as Schumer insisted on saying "POP... goes the weasel." for each vote Kagan received.

"Schumer? I don't even know... (Below threshold)

"Schumer? I don't even know her."

The New York Times reports ... (Below threshold)
Buckhunter:

The New York Times reports the Twin Towers have been rebuilt after almost nine years...

After a technical failure S... (Below threshold)

After a technical failure Schumer assumes duties as the manual TOTUS.

Senator Schumer tries to pl... (Below threshold)
Rick13:

Senator Schumer tries to play down the Wiki leaks damage by exclaiming "Nobody reads the New York Times anyway!".

This, ladies and gentlemen,... (Below threshold)
JPO:

This, ladies and gentlemen, is a newspaper. Once upon a time these were a vital and important source for obtaining the most current news and information.

Sen. Schumer displays the l... (Below threshold)
JPO:

Sen. Schumer displays the latest release from the Democratic PR department.

With newspaper readership i... (Below threshold)
JPO:

With newspaper readership in drastic decline, Sen. Schumer introduces a bill to place the newspaper on the endangered species list, thus ensuring his favorite propaganda tool will not forever disappear.

Schumer: "With this legisla... (Below threshold)
Upset Old Guy:

Schumer: "With this legislation, journalists who print this type of material will face imprisonment and financial ruin."

Reporter: "Does your bill also seek to penalize the leakers?"

Schumer: "I don't see any need to unfairly stigmatize members of my staff."

Senator Shumer wants to kno... (Below threshold)
Maggie Mama:

Senator Shumer wants to know why the story detailing his recent comments is below the fold.

Proof that the only people ... (Below threshold)
Maggie Mama:

Proof that the only people who read The New York Times live in Washington, D.C.

I'm selling this newspaper ... (Below threshold)
Oyster:

I'm selling this newspaper for $1. No, not just this paper - the whole business.

Can someone tell me how to ... (Below threshold)
CDR M:

Can someone tell me how to find the crossword puzzle in this newspaper so I can look busy while we pretend to discuss and analyze bills prior to enacting them into law?

"Black and white and .... I... (Below threshold)

"Black and white and .... I don't get it, this isn't red anywhere..."

"Bueller... Bueller... Buel... (Below threshold)
Lindy R. Dole:

"Bueller... Bueller... Bueller..."

Sen. Schumer realizes that ... (Below threshold)
chsw:

Sen. Schumer realizes that he has caught hiding porn behind the newspaper.

chsw

Sen. Schumer realizes that ... (Below threshold)
chsw:

Sen. Schumer realizes that he has been caught hiding porn behind the newspaper.

chsw

Chuckles: "Unlike governmen... (Below threshold)
SCSIwuzzy:

Chuckles: "Unlike government agencies like the SEC, which should not be questioned--"

Tea Party: "Because FOIA releases from the SEC would show how corrupt and feckless the Senators and Congresscritters have been and their part in causing the economic crash?!?"

Chuckles: "No! The topic is Wikileaks, whose leaks are criminal in that they--"

Tea Party: "Embarrassed the majority party and the President?!?"

Chuckles: "Security? Can we get the gallery cleared?"

Because, dammit, we prefer ... (Below threshold)
fustian:

Because, dammit, we prefer our treason coming from one of our own.

Without proper shield laws ... (Below threshold)
fustian:

Without proper shield laws the NYT may lose its ability to launch devastating attacks against Republicans!

Because it's not nearly as ... (Below threshold)
fustian:

Because it's not nearly as much fun speaking truth to power from behind bars...

I may not know what I'm tal... (Below threshold)
Ernie:

I may not know what I'm talking about, but holding this paper makes it look like I know what I am talking about.

Of course, journalists will... (Below threshold)
fustian:

Of course, journalists will not be protected if they foolishly attack democrats!

"Senator - why can the NY T... (Below threshold)
retired military:

"Senator - why can the NY Times publish top secret information but not wikileaks?"

Schumer - "You dont go publishing leaks under a democratic administraiton unless they give the okay"

Of course the NYT, Newsweek... (Below threshold)
fustian:

Of course the NYT, Newsweek, MSNBC, Daily Kos...these are all legitimate news sources. You can be certain that extreme right-wing hate sources like Fox, Rush Limbaugh, and Wizbang would not be protected by the shield law.

Schumer - "and if anyone kn... (Below threshold)
retired military:

Schumer - "and if anyone knows about the appropriate timing of leaking classified information it is me"

Schumer "I am not an expert... (Below threshold)
retired military:

Schumer "I am not an expert on national security but I did stay at a Holiday Inn express last night"

It's cute when Schumer trie... (Below threshold)
fustian:

It's cute when Schumer tries to convince us he can read.

"...And that's not all, if ... (Below threshold)
MunDane68:

"...And that's not all, if you order today, we will send you your own Julian Assange signed body bag in addition to the Sunday Edition!"

They're trying to tell us t... (Below threshold)
fustian:

They're trying to tell us that gays have a Constitutional right to marry, that we are not allowed to control our borders, and that we will be forcibly required to buy health insurance.

Hey, let's just legalize treason.

Why the hell not?

Schumer "If you look at th... (Below threshold)
retired military:

Schumer "If you look at the picture closely gentlmen you can see that the lady in question was not looking out the same hotel room door that I was but merely came up the hall behind me."

"See! See! They finally q... (Below threshold)
jim2:

"See! See! They finally quoted me using 'scintilla.' It's about time! I've been using it for months, ever since I learned it actually was not what the brothel madam called the head Hun."

"Meh."... (Below threshold)

"Meh."

Chuckie does what he knows ... (Below threshold)
Gmac:

Chuckie does what he knows best to do, protect the guilty.

"I'd like to introduce my l... (Below threshold)
DJ Drummond:

"I'd like to introduce my legal counsel and chief character witness

...

why is everyone laughing?"

"This is the ONLY Constitut... (Below threshold)
recovered liberal democrat:

"This is the ONLY Constitution we need," says Schmucky Schumer,"the living breathing New York Slimes".

There were a few moments of... (Below threshold)
P. Bunyan:

There were a few moments of awkward silence at the press conference when a fly flew past Senator Schumer and the senator rapidly flipped out his tongue, caught it, and ate it.

A leak and a Leaker.... (Below threshold)
Pretzel Logic:

A leak and a Leaker.

Watch closely and I will sh... (Below threshold)
just bob:

Watch closely and I will show you how to wrap a fish,line your bird cage and train a puppy.

I'm shocked, shocked I tell... (Below threshold)
JAT0:

I'm shocked, shocked I tell you - why is the NYT NOT using our exact talking points that we sent out via our propaganda journalist?

Lame Schmuck!!... (Below threshold)
914:

Lame Schmuck!!

Remember, it is not shielde... (Below threshold)

Remember, it is not shielded unless it it something we like.

We strongly believe that jo... (Below threshold)
Jeff Blogworthy:

We strongly believe that journalistic treason should be limited to the New York Times and/or the Washington Post.

One is a mindless object th... (Below threshold)
sarahconnor2:

One is a mindless object that promotes treason and leftwing propaganda. The other is a newspaper.

Sen Schumer briefs the pres... (Below threshold)
retired military:

Sen Schumer briefs the press "... and we want this picture centered under the headline for maximum effect. And if you want an interview with Obama this year then ensure you use the phrase "viscous republican attacks" in the first paragraph"

Speaking of leaks, I hear l... (Below threshold)
BluesHarper:

Speaking of leaks, I hear lining our cages with this is cheaper than Bounty.

I am telling you people tha... (Below threshold)
rich:

I am telling you people that I win! See...Paper covers rock! Thats how we get things done around here.

Senator Schumer attempted t... (Below threshold)
jbw:

Senator Schumer attempted to persuade seniors the new "Water Bottle Vision Enhancement" for seniors would work as well as normal reading glasses under the Obama medicare plans.

I'm sorry, did you say some... (Below threshold)
GarandFan:

I'm sorry, did you say something in response to my question?

"I ask you again, Mr. Sulzb... (Below threshold)
teh wind:

"I ask you again, Mr. Sulzberger, why am I not on the front page of today's issue of your newspaper? I remind you, you're under oath."

Both the newspaper and the ... (Below threshold)
Faith+1:

Both the newspaper and the Senator are?:

A) relics of the past of items with outdated ideas
B)crybabies lamenting their loss of power
C) wrinkled old media whores
D) leave inky stains on your fingers if you touch them
E) all the above with other comparisons too numerous to write

Yo, Nancy! Can I get a litt... (Below threshold)
Roy:

Yo, Nancy! Can I get a little more coffee ovah heyah?

I'm told Pelosi uses this t... (Below threshold)
BluesHarper:

I'm told Pelosi uses this to sop up leaks.

So can you explain to me wh... (Below threshold)
Jeff:

So can you explain to me why my picture wasn't featured above the fold ?

"As a friendly reminder to ... (Below threshold)
rbee:

"As a friendly reminder to the minions @msnbc,cnn,cbs,nbc,abc this is your show prep,no sodoku until the regime approves todays talking points, period full stop"

Chuck: "The NYT is now avai... (Below threshold)

Chuck: "The NYT is now available in English for our constituents, in Spanish for our new immigrant friends, and in monosyllabic words for us."

"If your all thru leakin... (Below threshold)
914:

"If your all thru leaking it's time to change your depend's Chucky!!"


I have been through this en... (Below threshold)

I have been through this entire paper and there is only one story that mentions me. This is UNACCEPTABLE.

Chucky is disturbed by the ... (Below threshold)
clearmind:

Chucky is disturbed by the bald head that is getting more attention than him. Hey, who let the cameras into my hearing, anyway.

Schumer: "How dare newspape... (Below threshold)
Dodo David:

Schumer: "How dare newspapers harm our national security by publishing classified information! Don't they know that a Democrat now occupies the Oval Office?"

Sen. Schumer passes the 'ru... (Below threshold)
Jeff Blogworthy:

Sen. Schumer passes the 'ruling class' checklist with flying colors.

1. Pompous ass - check
2. Looking down nose - check
3. Imperious - check
4. Condescending - check
5. Bloviating - check
6. One standard for him and another for the rest of us - check
7. $2,000 taxpayer funded suit - check
8. $100 haircut - check
9. Metrosexual manicure
10. Lies through teeth - check

We bought this Newsweek thi... (Below threshold)

We bought this Newsweek thing for $1 and we'll resell it for $5 in a few years and exempt ourselves from the taxes!

I will lower the newspaper ... (Below threshold)

I will lower the newspaper when Miss Lewinsky is finished, not before!

Chuck Schumer tries to bloc... (Below threshold)

Chuck Schumer tries to block some of the reflection from Henry Waxman's head.

Schumer: "Ladies and Gentle... (Below threshold)
Dodo David:

Schumer: "Ladies and Gentlemen, I assure you that my Democrat colleagues and I are working hard to change this situation pertaining to WikiLeaks. Before the upcoming November elections, we will find a way to pin the blame on the Republicans."

F**k! No I'm not making it... (Below threshold)
Bill Fabrizio:

F**k! No I'm not making it up, I found the name of every Democrat in Congress in today's OBIT section!

Unfortunately for Schumer, ... (Below threshold)
Dodo David:

Unfortunately for Schumer, the light reflected of the chrome dome prevented people from seeing what the Senator was showing.

I have to take exception to... (Below threshold)
SShiell:

I have to take exception to this headline that reads "Schumer is a Dick!"

Does anyone besides me have... (Below threshold)
Dodo David:

Does anyone besides me have the sudden urge to play billiards?

Then in the next window Blo... (Below threshold)
Allium:

Then in the next window Blondie catches Oba.., I mean Dagwood, napping.

It's come to my attention t... (Below threshold)
Maggie Mama:

It's come to my attention that Sharron Angle has blamed Senator Reid for some coked-up monkeys. Although I am eager to assume his position of power when he is defeated, I must say I don't think the Senator really meant to get the monkeys high but rather just spur the economy with research dollars and that this never would have happened if Harry had had the time to read the Stimulus Bill.

Read the bill? But I wanna ... (Below threshold)
MjM:

Read the bill? But I wanna finish this Style section.

Don't get me wrong .. it sa... (Below threshold)
Neo:

Don't get me wrong .. it says here that I'm a nice guy

Sen Schumer lost his train ... (Below threshold)
retired military:

Sen Schumer lost his train of thought when VP Biden sitting behind him stated aloud "Hold it up higher Chuck, I cant quite see all of Ms July"

Hey Chucky' "When are the... (Below threshold)
914:

Hey Chucky' "When are the New York Slime's going to release the sensitive part's of the bill so you asshat's can vote on it?"

And here is another example... (Below threshold)
Dana:

And here is another example of something I don't read in addition to the legislation I pass.

I got Nuthin.... (Below threshold)
rich K:

I got Nuthin.

Sir, you see all those phot... (Below threshold)
eaglewingz08:

Sir, you see all those photos on this page, and I ask you, WHERE IS MINE? You don't seem to know who I am! I worked good and hard to get the name Senator and you refused to put my photo in. Have you no shame!

"I wish that something........ (Below threshold)
Spike:

"I wish that something.....anything, funny could be said about me.

"That's funny; IndyMac was ... (Below threshold)
Spike:

"That's funny; IndyMac was listed in the Stock Listings just two years ago. Now I can't find it anywhere."

"I am kept informed by an i... (Below threshold)
Spike:

"I am kept informed by an increasingly irrelevant form of media that is increasingly sycophantic of an increasingly incompetent President."

My true goal in life is to ... (Below threshold)
RadiCalMan:

My true goal in life is to be on the front page of the New York Times everyday, even if it is below the fold.

This is conclusive proof th... (Below threshold)
sputum:

This is conclusive proof that the Republicans wish to thrust a dagger through the President's heart.

Hey Page! I'll have the lox... (Below threshold)
Sir Toby Belch:

Hey Page! I'll have the lox schmear on a raisin
bagel and a chocolate egg cream. If you're
quick....there's a nickel in it for YOU!

"Let's see, a seven letter ... (Below threshold)
Sir Toby Belch:

"Let's see, a seven letter word for 'CREEP'....
begins with S...ends in R...third letter H...
Tough damned puzzle today!"

"I have here a bust of the ... (Below threshold)
Sir Toby Belch:

"I have here a bust of the one, true prophet,
Mohammed. If I'm not assured that Cap/Trade
passes, the "old gray lady" hits the desktop!


Obama Sucks!!!... (Below threshold)
914:

Obama Sucks!!!

"I didn't get a harumph fro... (Below threshold)

"I didn't get a harumph from that guy."

I fully support the Milwauk... (Below threshold)
Mark:

I fully support the Milwaukee teachers union in the demand for Viagra to be included in their health care benefits

Another blowhard liberal ob... (Below threshold)
914:

Another blowhard liberal obfuscating responsibility and affixing blame to some phantom nemesis.


What the hell! I come all ... (Below threshold)
clear mind:

What the hell! I come all the way from Yonkers to have my picture taken with the Senator and all I get are 2 bottles of water and a picture of my bald head?

The Senator attends another... (Below threshold)
fustian:

The Senator attends another Cue Balls For Schumer rally.

Update: <... (Below threshold)
Kevin Author Profile Page:

Update: Winners announced. Click the link to read the winning entries. The contest is now closed.




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