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Winners will be announced Monday morning.
Update: Winners announced. Click the link to read the winning entries. The contest is now closed.
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Comments (64)
Bristol: "Shut up Mom, you ... (Below threshold)1. Posted by rodney dill | May 13, 2011 7:14 AM | Score: 20 (20 votes cast)
Bristol: "Shut up Mom, you just don't do Tina Fey that well."
1. Posted by rodney dill | May 13, 2011 7:14 AM |
Score: 20 (20 votes cast)
Posted on May 13, 2011 07:14
2. Posted by retired military | May 13, 2011 7:15 AM | Score: 13 (19 votes cast)
So Obama thinks we want alligators in a moat along the border.
I guess he is trying to create a job for Michelle.
2. Posted by retired military | May 13, 2011 7:15 AM |
Score: 13 (19 votes cast)
Posted on May 13, 2011 07:15
3. Posted by Dodo David | May 13, 2011 7:19 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"Bristol, don't worry about what liberals will say about your new look. Plenty of them are two-faced themselves."
3. Posted by Dodo David | May 13, 2011 7:19 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on May 13, 2011 07:19
4. Posted by retired military | May 13, 2011 7:20 AM | Score: -2 (12 votes cast)
Palin
"well I have never seen a moose as big as Michelle when they were in season"
4. Posted by retired military | May 13, 2011 7:20 AM |
Score: -2 (12 votes cast)
Posted on May 13, 2011 07:20
5. Posted by dfbaskwill | May 13, 2011 7:20 AM | Score: 1 (1 votes cast)
Sarah Palin endorses a nearly human-looking Japanese Robot for Office.
5. Posted by dfbaskwill | May 13, 2011 7:20 AM |
Score: 1 (1 votes cast)
Posted on May 13, 2011 07:20
6. Posted by Brian The Adequate | May 13, 2011 7:28 AM | Score: -1 (7 votes cast)
Tomorrows headline on MSNBC:
Sarah Palin tries to sell daughter to older couple.
6. Posted by Brian The Adequate | May 13, 2011 7:28 AM |
Score: -1 (7 votes cast)
Posted on May 13, 2011 07:28
7. Posted by Pretzel_Logic | May 13, 2011 7:40 AM | Score: -1 (5 votes cast)
"I can see your scares from my house"
7. Posted by Pretzel_Logic | May 13, 2011 7:40 AM |
Score: -1 (5 votes cast)
Posted on May 13, 2011 07:40
8. Posted by Chico | May 13, 2011 7:56 AM | Score: -14 (18 votes cast)
"Wow, nice work on the jaw line, Bristol!"
http://www.joemcginniss.net/thought-it-couldnt-get-worse-bristols-reality-show-coming-soon/JoeMcGinniss
8. Posted by Chico | May 13, 2011 7:56 AM |
Score: -14 (18 votes cast)
Posted on May 13, 2011 07:56
9. Posted by hermie | May 13, 2011 7:57 AM | Score: 7 (11 votes cast)
"Do I have any comments about the current list of GOP Presidential hopefuls?"
(To herself)
Hmmm...Ron Paul and his Bin laden statement...
Romney and his Romneycare speech...
Daniels and his inability to convince his wife to let him run, and his not ready for a debate on foreign policy...
Gingrich ...enough said...
I just need a couple more to shoot themselves in the foot.
"Not really. I rather would talk about President Obama's record."
9. Posted by hermie | May 13, 2011 7:57 AM |
Score: 7 (11 votes cast)
Posted on May 13, 2011 07:57
10. Posted by retired military | May 13, 2011 7:59 AM | Score: 7 (15 votes cast)
Chico's deepest darkest fantasy.
10. Posted by retired military | May 13, 2011 7:59 AM |
Score: 7 (15 votes cast)
Posted on May 13, 2011 07:59
11. Posted by retired military | May 13, 2011 8:04 AM | Score: 29 (37 votes cast)
Palin "What do I think of Obama's moat comment? Well if they used 50 alligators then Obama would claim that is another 50 jobs created"
11. Posted by retired military | May 13, 2011 8:04 AM |
Score: 29 (37 votes cast)
Posted on May 13, 2011 08:04
12. Posted by tomg51 | May 13, 2011 8:12 AM | Score: -6 (6 votes cast)
Palin watching the Bin Ladin feed.
12. Posted by tomg51 | May 13, 2011 8:12 AM |
Score: -6 (6 votes cast)
Posted on May 13, 2011 08:12
13. Posted by Jeff Blogworthy | May 13, 2011 8:27 AM | Score: 14 (16 votes cast)
Palin: Looking better all the time.
13. Posted by Jeff Blogworthy | May 13, 2011 8:27 AM |
Score: 14 (16 votes cast)
Posted on May 13, 2011 08:27
14. Posted by Jeff Blogworthy | May 13, 2011 8:41 AM | Score: 9 (9 votes cast)
Seeing that Sarah's not home, Chico fantasizes about propositioning Todd.
14. Posted by Jeff Blogworthy | May 13, 2011 8:41 AM |
Score: 9 (9 votes cast)
Posted on May 13, 2011 08:41
15. Posted by MunDane | May 13, 2011 8:47 AM | Score: 6 (6 votes cast)
Once this photo was displayed on MSNBC, the population of progressives was cut in half overnight.
Unfortunately, the clean-up of the exploded heads would go on for weeks...
15. Posted by MunDane | May 13, 2011 8:47 AM |
Score: 6 (6 votes cast)
Posted on May 13, 2011 08:47
16. Posted by WildWillie | May 13, 2011 8:52 AM | Score: 2 (2 votes cast)
"Chin up honey!" ww
16. Posted by WildWillie | May 13, 2011 8:52 AM |
Score: 2 (2 votes cast)
Posted on May 13, 2011 08:52
17. Posted by Jeff Blogworthy | May 13, 2011 8:55 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Leftist-colored glasses:
Obama "birthers" -- crazy.
Trig "birthers" -- perfectly rational.
17. Posted by Jeff Blogworthy | May 13, 2011 8:55 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on May 13, 2011 08:55
18. Posted by Pretzel_Logic | May 13, 2011 8:58 AM | Score: 0 (4 votes cast)
"I can see your scars from my house"
(opps)
18. Posted by Pretzel_Logic | May 13, 2011 8:58 AM |
Score: 0 (4 votes cast)
Posted on May 13, 2011 08:58
19. Posted by john1v6 | May 13, 2011 9:02 AM | Score: 4 (4 votes cast)
Liberal heads explode at the Emmys, as "Sarah Palin's Alaska" wins Best Travel Show
19. Posted by john1v6 | May 13, 2011 9:02 AM |
Score: 4 (4 votes cast)
Posted on May 13, 2011 09:02
20. Posted by DJ Drummond | May 13, 2011 9:07 AM | Score: 6 (10 votes cast)
Hillary Clinton (left) watches as three republicans discuss why conservatives tend to be better-looking than liberals.
20. Posted by DJ Drummond | May 13, 2011 9:07 AM |
Score: 6 (10 votes cast)
Posted on May 13, 2011 09:07
21. Posted by rodney dill | May 13, 2011 9:17 AM | Score: -1 (3 votes cast)
"...and here's my Osama impression... blub blub blub blub blub blub...."
21. Posted by rodney dill | May 13, 2011 9:17 AM |
Score: -1 (3 votes cast)
Posted on May 13, 2011 09:17
22. Posted by Marky | May 13, 2011 9:21 AM | Score: -10 (16 votes cast)
Seacrest gave Bristol a pearl necklace too, but hers is still drying...
22. Posted by Marky | May 13, 2011 9:21 AM |
Score: -10 (16 votes cast)
Posted on May 13, 2011 09:21
23. Posted by rodney dill | May 13, 2011 9:23 AM | Score: 4 (4 votes cast)
"Anyone see Bristol... I hear her voice, but I don't see my daughter anywhere... BRISTOL!"
23. Posted by rodney dill | May 13, 2011 9:23 AM |
Score: 4 (4 votes cast)
Posted on May 13, 2011 09:23
24. Posted by retired military | May 13, 2011 9:24 AM | Score: 2 (4 votes cast)
Palin "What is wrong with the economy? Well to quote Chico "I blame Obama""
24. Posted by retired military | May 13, 2011 9:24 AM |
Score: 2 (4 votes cast)
Posted on May 13, 2011 09:24
25. Posted by Upset Old Guy | May 13, 2011 9:25 AM | Score: -2 (2 votes cast)
Guy on the left - "If this bimbo in the pearls were to bend forward a bit I might catch a little nipple."
25. Posted by Upset Old Guy | May 13, 2011 9:25 AM |
Score: -2 (2 votes cast)
Posted on May 13, 2011 09:25
26. Posted by fustian | May 13, 2011 9:25 AM | Score: -1 (1 votes cast)
Bristol, here's a thought.
Maybe you could refrain from moving into the house of a couple of Hollywood actors at least until I decide for sure whether I'm going to run for President.
26. Posted by fustian | May 13, 2011 9:25 AM |
Score: -1 (1 votes cast)
Posted on May 13, 2011 09:25
27. Posted by fustian | May 13, 2011 9:27 AM | Score: 15 (17 votes cast)
No, Mr. President.
We want the alligator-filled moat between you and the Treasury.
27. Posted by fustian | May 13, 2011 9:27 AM |
Score: 15 (17 votes cast)
Posted on May 13, 2011 09:27
28. Posted by Olsoljer | May 13, 2011 9:29 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Joy Behar looks on as the replacement cast for "The View" discusses Sean Hannity's appearance as stheir first guest.
28. Posted by Olsoljer | May 13, 2011 9:29 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on May 13, 2011 09:29
29. Posted by fustian | May 13, 2011 9:31 AM | Score: 2 (2 votes cast)
Mr. President, this moat idea of yours sounds like an ideal "shovel-ready" project.
Think of the jobs that could be save AND created!
29. Posted by fustian | May 13, 2011 9:31 AM |
Score: 2 (2 votes cast)
Posted on May 13, 2011 09:31
30. Posted by fustian | May 13, 2011 9:33 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Mr. President, this moat idea of yours sounds like an ideal "shovel-ready" project.
Think of the jobs that could be save AND created!
30. Posted by fustian | May 13, 2011 9:33 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on May 13, 2011 09:33
31. Posted by fustian | May 13, 2011 9:35 AM | Score: 3 (3 votes cast)
Oops. Sorry for the double post.
I feel like Charley Rangel snapping up rent-controlled apartments!
31. Posted by fustian | May 13, 2011 9:35 AM |
Score: 3 (3 votes cast)
Posted on May 13, 2011 09:35
32. Posted by fustian | May 13, 2011 9:39 AM | Score: 5 (5 votes cast)
Mr. President, have you given sufficient thought about how we're going to feed all of those border gators of yours?
I say if you ever run out of lawyers, you might consider closing Gitmo after all...
32. Posted by fustian | May 13, 2011 9:39 AM |
Score: 5 (5 votes cast)
Posted on May 13, 2011 09:39
33. Posted by Don L | May 13, 2011 9:40 AM | Score: 1 (1 votes cast)
"...and, there I was standing in carabou crap up to my knickers, when I could feel this hot grizzly breath on the back of my neck..."
33. Posted by Don L | May 13, 2011 9:40 AM |
Score: 1 (1 votes cast)
Posted on May 13, 2011 09:40
34. Posted by Don L | May 13, 2011 9:42 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
See Russia from my home, well those liars said that I hunt in my red spike-heels too....
34. Posted by Don L | May 13, 2011 9:42 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on May 13, 2011 09:42
35. Posted by fustian | May 13, 2011 9:44 AM | Score: 5 (5 votes cast)
And, Mr. President, if you should have difficulty finding enough border alligators, you might consider a bunch of frickin' sharks with frickin' lasers attached to their frickin' heads.
35. Posted by fustian | May 13, 2011 9:44 AM |
Score: 5 (5 votes cast)
Posted on May 13, 2011 09:44
36. Posted by Don L | May 13, 2011 9:53 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"I'm telling you,folks that saying, "Obama wear Birkenstocks" will win the Alaska vote for us.
36. Posted by Don L | May 13, 2011 9:53 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on May 13, 2011 09:53
37. Posted by PBunyan | May 13, 2011 9:53 AM | Score: 1 (3 votes cast)
Sarah to Bristol: "Just please remember the #1 lesson I've learned since appearing on the national stage: If an 'objective journalist' asks to interview you, agree to it only if it's live. Otherwise they'll carefully edit everything you say to falsely make you look stupid. The only stupid thing I've every done was agreeing to edited interviews by the likes of evil, dishonest, hate-filled Marxists like Couric and Gibson"
37. Posted by PBunyan | May 13, 2011 9:53 AM |
Score: 1 (3 votes cast)
Posted on May 13, 2011 09:53
38. Posted by DJ Drummond | May 13, 2011 10:20 AM | Score: 6 (12 votes cast)
"So it's Sunday and I'm cooking up a nice Moose Roast, and I get a phone call from Barack. Seems Hillary and Leon figured out where Osama bin Laden was and they're pushing Barack to approve the mission, but he can't decide and W wasn't available for advice, so he asked me what to do."
38. Posted by DJ Drummond | May 13, 2011 10:20 AM |
Score: 6 (12 votes cast)
Posted on May 13, 2011 10:20
39. Posted by Faith+1 | May 13, 2011 10:37 AM | Score: 6 (6 votes cast)
Andrew Sullivan's insists this new girl is not Bristol, but Sarah's other love child from an illicit affair with a Californian plastic surgeon.
39. Posted by Faith+1 | May 13, 2011 10:37 AM |
Score: 6 (6 votes cast)
Posted on May 13, 2011 10:37
40. Posted by Evo | May 13, 2011 10:39 AM | Score: -1 (1 votes cast)
She who smelt it, dealt it.
40. Posted by Evo | May 13, 2011 10:39 AM |
Score: -1 (1 votes cast)
Posted on May 13, 2011 10:39
41. Posted by Faith+1 | May 13, 2011 10:39 AM | Score: 1 (3 votes cast)
Tina Fey and Bai Ling make a guest appearance on SNL...
41. Posted by Faith+1 | May 13, 2011 10:39 AM |
Score: 1 (3 votes cast)
Posted on May 13, 2011 10:39
42. Posted by Faith+1 | May 13, 2011 10:40 AM | Score: 1 (3 votes cast)
(Due on the left)
I'm an old man, but my God.....Tits!
42. Posted by Faith+1 | May 13, 2011 10:40 AM |
Score: 1 (3 votes cast)
Posted on May 13, 2011 10:40
43. Posted by hermie | May 13, 2011 10:45 AM | Score: 6 (6 votes cast)
Sarah Palin denies the rumors that the live feed from the SEAL attack in Pakistan was 'blacked out' was because Obama saw that she was the one who actually took out Bin Laden.
43. Posted by hermie | May 13, 2011 10:45 AM |
Score: 6 (6 votes cast)
Posted on May 13, 2011 10:45
44. Posted by BluesHarper | May 13, 2011 11:10 AM | Score: 0 (2 votes cast)
"...and here's my Obama impression... blah blah blah blah blah blah...."
(Stolen mostly from Rodney Dill - sorry, I couldn't help myself.)
44. Posted by BluesHarper | May 13, 2011 11:10 AM |
Score: 0 (2 votes cast)
Posted on May 13, 2011 11:10
45. Posted by retired military | May 13, 2011 11:25 AM | Score: 4 (6 votes cast)
Palin "What's the difference between shooting a dirty, lowdown, slinking, thieving, good for nothing, polecat and shooting a liberal? Well you can eat the polecat"
45. Posted by retired military | May 13, 2011 11:25 AM |
Score: 4 (6 votes cast)
Posted on May 13, 2011 11:25
46. Posted by GianiD | May 13, 2011 11:27 AM | Score: 6 (6 votes cast)
I'm too sexy for the libs, too sexy for the libs
46. Posted by GianiD | May 13, 2011 11:27 AM |
Score: 6 (6 votes cast)
Posted on May 13, 2011 11:27
47. Posted by rodney dill | May 13, 2011 11:37 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"What do I say about a moat full of alligators? how bout, "CHOOT'EM CHOOT'EM CHET, CHOOT'EM!, you betchya."
47. Posted by rodney dill | May 13, 2011 11:37 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on May 13, 2011 11:37
48. Posted by tomg51 | May 13, 2011 12:12 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
SEALs and seals,
They all make her smile.
48. Posted by tomg51 | May 13, 2011 12:12 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on May 13, 2011 12:12
49. Posted by rodney dill | May 13, 2011 12:15 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"Oh, its Botox you used. With Pelosi it never seemed strange to me, but I always wondered why people said she used buttocks on her face."
49. Posted by rodney dill | May 13, 2011 12:15 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on May 13, 2011 12:15
50. Posted by Sep14 | May 13, 2011 1:26 PM | Score: 3 (3 votes cast)
Relax chicos, She's above your pay grade!
50. Posted by Sep14 | May 13, 2011 1:26 PM |
Score: 3 (3 votes cast)
Posted on May 13, 2011 13:26
51. Posted by itismedavid | May 13, 2011 2:38 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
I just came from the WH Correspondents Association dinner. I need a nice Italian wine.
51. Posted by itismedavid | May 13, 2011 2:38 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on May 13, 2011 14:38
52. Posted by warchild | May 13, 2011 3:25 PM | Score: -6 (6 votes cast)
Let's have a witches coven!
52. Posted by warchild | May 13, 2011 3:25 PM |
Score: -6 (6 votes cast)
Posted on May 13, 2011 15:25
53. Posted by levi | May 13, 2011 3:26 PM | Score: -14 (18 votes cast)
"Next, take the ball sack gently into your mouth. Watch the teeth! Then suck lightly and swirl your tongue around. And that's how you teabag! Now, go practice on your father."
53. Posted by levi | May 13, 2011 3:26 PM |
Score: -14 (18 votes cast)
Posted on May 13, 2011 15:26
54. Posted by Timmer | May 13, 2011 4:35 PM | Score: -5 (5 votes cast)
Whaddya MEAN my 15 minutes are up?
54. Posted by Timmer | May 13, 2011 4:35 PM |
Score: -5 (5 votes cast)
Posted on May 13, 2011 16:35
55. Posted by rodney dill | May 13, 2011 5:45 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Bristol: "...and I have one woman to credit for everything I have become and will be. One woman who is strong, courageous, honest, and would never mislead the public.... Octomom."
55. Posted by rodney dill | May 13, 2011 5:45 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on May 13, 2011 17:45
56. Posted by chsw | May 13, 2011 5:55 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Palin smiles as she realizes that Bristol will now be out of her hair forever.
chsw
56. Posted by chsw | May 13, 2011 5:55 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on May 13, 2011 17:55
57. Posted by rodney dill | May 13, 2011 9:05 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"What was the last thing Osama said to Seal Team Six?"
"I dunno."
"I'll keep and eye out for ya."
57. Posted by rodney dill | May 13, 2011 9:05 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on May 13, 2011 21:05
58. Posted by Jeff Blogworthy | May 13, 2011 9:50 PM | Score: 2 (2 votes cast)
Nothing epitomizes the left's idea of "civil discourse" like Sarah Palin.
58. Posted by Jeff Blogworthy | May 13, 2011 9:50 PM |
Score: 2 (2 votes cast)
Posted on May 13, 2011 21:50
59. Posted by Jeff Blogworthy | May 13, 2011 9:53 PM | Score: 2 (2 votes cast)
Listen to the Left. They will tell you who they fear.
59. Posted by Jeff Blogworthy | May 13, 2011 9:53 PM |
Score: 2 (2 votes cast)
Posted on May 13, 2011 21:53
60. Posted by Sep14 | May 14, 2011 12:19 AM | Score: 2 (2 votes cast)
Yes, the jealousy and gnashing of teeth is an indication of chicos deep emotional longing to be nurtured by a loving Mother which never occurred.
pathetic? Yes.
60. Posted by Sep14 | May 14, 2011 12:19 AM |
Score: 2 (2 votes cast)
Posted on May 14, 2011 00:19
61. Posted by Sep14 | May 14, 2011 12:28 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
^ I blame the Koch's ^
61. Posted by Sep14 | May 14, 2011 12:28 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on May 14, 2011 00:28
62. Posted by CZ | May 14, 2011 7:38 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Ooooo, those chin scars from Levi's nutsack are barely visible.
62. Posted by CZ | May 14, 2011 7:38 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on May 14, 2011 07:38
63. Posted by rodney dill | May 14, 2011 4:18 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"Yes Mom, I see the lipstick."
63. Posted by rodney dill | May 14, 2011 4:18 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on May 14, 2011 16:18
64. Posted by Kevin
| May 16, 2011 1:40 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Update: Winners announced. Click the link to read the winning entries. The contest is now closed.
64. Posted by Kevin
| May 16, 2011 1:40 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on May 16, 2011 01:40