Wizbang Weekend Caption Contest™

101 Comments

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1. Commander_Chico March 30, 2012

   “Set the controls for the heart of the sun.”
2. Stephen Macklin March 30, 2012

   So with this I can get in a full 18 holes and be home in time to play basketball? Sweet!
3. Stephen Macklin March 30, 2012

   Will this help me score with the chicks over at Georgetown Law?
4. Stephen Macklin March 30, 2012

   I bet I can spend a billion dollars before you can get this off the ground.
5. RDOwens March 30, 2012

   So, how much algae does this thing burn?
6. RDOwens March 30, 2012

   We’re not going to Vegas.  Guys, push it to full throttle.
7. emrengineer March 30, 2012

   Yes Mr. President, these are the new controls the EPA is mandating to be on all new automobiles.
8. emrengineer March 30, 2012

   Obama “So you wanted me here to show me this new advanced airplane that even an idiot could fly?”
9. Pretzel__Logic March 30, 2012

   Do you like movies about Gladiators?
    
10. Pretzel__Logic March 30, 2012

    So I can fly this straight into the ground? Like I did the economy?
     
11. Pretzel__Logic March 30, 2012

    If I was a pilot, I would look like me.
12. Pretzel__Logic March 30, 2012

    Anything here I can give the Russians?
13. Pretzel__Logic March 30, 2012

     I am serious… and don’t call me Shirley!
14. Entrope March 30, 2012

    Moments later, the captain was observed running down the aisle, shouting about imminent environmental doom.
15. Pretzel__Logic March 30, 2012

    Think this’ll run on arugula?
16. Pretzel__Logic March 30, 2012

    Looks like I picked the wrong week to play the race card.
17. PBunyan March 30, 2012

    Obama:  “If I was a pilot, I would look like this.”
18. fustian24 March 30, 2012

    Where do they fit the TelePrompTer?
19. fustian24 March 30, 2012

    Why are all the passengers exiting the plane?
20. fustian24 March 30, 2012

    It’s a Chevy MegaVolt!
21. fustian24 March 30, 2012

    Like the economy, Obama can’t get this off the ground either.
22. fustian24 March 30, 2012

    You know Bush could actually fly one of these. 

    Just saying…
23. fustian24 March 30, 2012

    Obama becomes oddly subdued as he realizes this is something he could never actually fake
24. fustian24 March 30, 2012

    You know, if it wasn’t for racist Republicans Trayvon Martin could be sitting here some day. 
25. Gmacr1 March 30, 2012

    So how much training do you need to fly one of these without having to learn how to land?
26. Brian_The_Adequate March 30, 2012

    I sure would like Obama’s answer to be yes in 2014.
    Question: Have you ever been in a Turkish Prison?
27. herddog505 March 30, 2012

    Michelle’s got the kids and her wardrobe tucked away.  Joe’s safely strapped in and babbling to himself in the back.  Nancy’s checked out the bar and it’s A-OK.  The wagyu, arugala and my golf clubs are on board.  Fire this puppy up!  It’s vacation time again!  F*CK!  I LOVE THIS JOB!
28. herddog505 March 30, 2012

    … and I love the mini teleprompters in the windows.
29. The_Albatross March 30, 2012

    “Which button do I press to release the sharks with lasers on their heads?”
30. Rick Adams March 30, 2012

    “Whaddya mean, ‘Set transponder to squawk 7500?’  Just tell me what button to push.”  
    • Dan Melson March 30, 2012

       Brilliant!  (If you don’t know what this means, ask a pilot or controller)
    • Brucepall March 30, 2012

      Emergency IFF transponder – hijack in progress.  

      Subtle, but absolutely hilarious.

      +1 Rick
31. Dan Melson March 30, 2012

    Co-pilot (in the right seat): No, the reason we’re crashing is because you flew it that way.  Has nothing to do with the last pilot, you imbecile!
32. UOG March 30, 2012

    Hey, can you give me printouts on everything you’ve got on molding composite structures. Yeah, Sarkozy is hosting me and Michelle in a couple of weeks and I need to bring him some kind of a Thank You gift.
33. Joe_Miller March 30, 2012

    I think I’m a better speech writer than my speech writers, I know more
    about policies on any particular issue than my policy directors. And
    I’ll tell you right now that I’m … a better pilot than my Air Force One pilot.
34. Joe_Miller March 30, 2012

    All I want to know is WHERE’S THE DAMN RADIO!
35. John March 30, 2012

    Sir, just sit here and play with the buttons while the grown-ups handle things in Washington.
36. John March 30, 2012

    I see a Republican.  Which button fires the missiles?
37. GarandFan March 30, 2012

    Bet I could learn to fly this in just a couple of minutes.  I’m that awesome.  Just look at all I’ve done for the economy.
38. fustian24 March 30, 2012

    Oh course I know how to start it. I just have to find the “Stimulus Button”…
39. Vagabond661 March 30, 2012

    What’s your vector, Victor?
40. Brad March 30, 2012

    Pontius Pilot
    • kevwiz April 1, 2012

      Or – Pompous Pilot
41. Brad March 30, 2012

    I thought terrorists weren’t allowed in the cockpit
42. Doc Musgrove March 30, 2012

    Hey!  Don’t bother with landing instructions, I have other plans.
43. fustian24 March 30, 2012

    It’s Air Farce One…
44. Hank_M March 30, 2012

    We begin bombing the Supreme Court in five minutes.
45. 914 March 30, 2012

    Barry take the wheel……And shove it up your ass
46. Conservachef March 30, 2012

    Yeah, well people said that I wasn’t qualified to be President, either.
47. sabbahillel March 30, 2012

    Swell, so this is the new campaign bus
48. sabbahillel March 30, 2012

    Wow, my chauffeur really does have to know what he’s doing.
49. Conservachef March 30, 2012

    Oooh look! Is that a built-in teleprompter? And one for the co-pilot!
50. Jon pirrong March 30, 2012

    With “president” off the list, Obama moves onto find another job he is unqualified for.
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