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Weekend Caption Contest™

It's Friday, which means it's time for the Wizbang Weekend Caption Contest™.

REUTERS/Jason Reed

Winners will be announced Sunday.

Comments (86)

Everyone has to laugh when ... (Below threshold)

Everyone has to laugh when Bill makes the comment, "if only Monica had an umbrella that day......"

Bill and Hillary stopped la... (Below threshold)

Bill and Hillary stopped laughing when Bush pulled the rope to release the hounds.

GWB: "You know Bill, I thou... (Below threshold)

GWB: "You know Bill, I thought that Rove's idea of giving CBS the forged memos was brilliant, but your idea of using Joe Lockhart to tie it to the Kerry campaign just takes the cake. "

"John Kerry. "... (Below threshold)

"John Kerry. "

Dubya: "Whereinthehell a... (Below threshold)
Rodney Dill:

Dubya: "Whereinthehell are all the books?"

"Gee, Dubya. I didn't know... (Below threshold)
Laura Z:

"Gee, Dubya. I didn't know you could rip one like that!"

Dubya: "...and as a good... (Below threshold)
Rodney Dill:

Dubya: "...and as a goodwill gesture I would like to contribute the complete collection of Ann Coulter's books to your library."

I told the White House pres... (Below threshold)

I told the White House press corp I had a mandate.

"Usually only Bill's cigars... (Below threshold)

"Usually only Bill's cigars get this wet!"

Dubya: " It's ironic that I... (Below threshold)

Dubya: " It's ironic that I'm at the opening of a library, sitting next to the ONLY 3 people in this state that know how to read"!

"This Yakov Smirnov guy is ... (Below threshold)

"This Yakov Smirnov guy is high-larious!"

Bill: "Oh Man... You're ... (Below threshold)
Rodney Dill:

Bill: "Oh Man... You're in Arkansas now, libraries don't need no stinkin' books"

George Bush pulls the cord ... (Below threshold)

George Bush pulls the cord that creates a hurricane, this time in Arkansas.

Everyone at the opening of ... (Below threshold)

Everyone at the opening of the Clinton library was simply delighted when they saw Ken Starr's limo pass without stopping.

We fooled 'em twice, Hill, ... (Below threshold)
Just Don:

We fooled 'em twice, Hill, I tell ya, we can do it again!

"Put that damn Dick Cheney ... (Below threshold)
Rodney Dill:

"Put that damn Dick Cheney picture away, jees, my wife and kid are here."

Shoot Bill, did you have to... (Below threshold)

Shoot Bill, did you have to make the "Oval Office Ride" so realistic?

After meeting briefly with ... (Below threshold)

After meeting briefly with Bono of U2 before his performance at the dedication ceremony, George Bush and the entire Clinton family realize simultaneously that there was definitely something “funny” in those cigarettes Bono passed around.

"I shoulda worn my raincoat... (Below threshold)

"I shoulda worn my raincoat."
"What do you mean? Your daughter's beautiful now."

GWB: "You were right about... (Below threshold)

GWB: "You were right about those two grooves in the carpet in the Oval Office. I trip over them all the time. How did they get there? Dad said they weren't there when he was President."

GWB: "You know if we play t... (Below threshold)

GWB: "You know if we play this right it could be Bush-Clinton-Bush-Clinton-Bush-Clinton forever."

"Hey there's John out in th... (Below threshold)

"Hey there's John out in the audience. John, Come on up here. Oh wait this are is for Presidents only."

W: So...Chelsea...working ... (Below threshold)

W: So...Chelsea...working on your southern accent yet? Never too early to start.

BC: "Everybody says make-up... (Below threshold)

BC: "Everybody says make-up sex is the best, but I told you Sex-in-the-White-House really IS the best. "
GWB: "Not so loud Dick Cheney might be listening."

"Wasn't me who farted," sai... (Below threshold)

"Wasn't me who farted," said Dubya squinting with exertion, while the crowd roared with laughter.

51 percent?!? No way!... (Below threshold)

51 percent?!? No way!

GWB (thought balloon): "smi... (Below threshold)

GWB (thought balloon): "smile, don't scowl. smile, don't scowl. smile, don't scowl. Oh lord - how am I going to take standing next to these two for 30 more years of this ceremonially crap? Where is Barbara?"

The Clinton family has a go... (Below threshold)

The Clinton family has a good laugh at George Bush's dead-on impersonation of Algore talking about the Social Security "lock-box".

GW: Bill, I've seen statues... (Below threshold)

GW: Bill, I've seen statues that pee before, but how DID you get it to do THAT? Glad this exhibit comes with umbrellas

BC: Mr. President, it doesn't if you have a blue dress on.... Hahaha!

Hey, look! George doesn't r... (Below threshold)

Hey, look! George doesn't realize that we switched his umbrella for a baton!

President Bush and the Clin... (Below threshold)

President Bush and the Clinton family discuss John Kerry's chances of winning the Democratic Presidential nomination in 2008.....

I never should have bet aga... (Below threshold)

I never should have bet against CBS running the memos and claiming they were real. Now I'm stick at this prick's library getting soaked.

George W gets a laugh with ... (Below threshold)

George W gets a laugh with his Bob Dole impersonation.

"So Bill, just who is going... (Below threshold)
Rodney Dill:

"So Bill, just who is going to get the job of Head Librarian."

"Bill, I don't think I brou... (Below threshold)

"Bill, I don't think I brought my LIBERRY card"

GWB: "It was just where you... (Below threshold)

GWB: "It was just where you said it was but I couldn't resist changing to

W: "Read my lips, no nude ... (Below threshold)

W: "Read my lips, no nude interns"


W: "President Al Gore."


Dubya and 3 Dubya voters.

Chelsea: You know for a Rep... (Below threshold)
Tony Mc:

Chelsea: You know for a Republican he's kinda cute.

Hillary: I think 4 years is not so bad, he's pretty good looking.

Bill: Damn he's HOT!!! I wonder if he likes cigars???

Chelsea: You know for a Rep... (Below threshold)
Tony Mc:

Chelsea: You know for a Republican he's kinda cute.

Hillary: I think 4 years is not so bad, he's pretty good looking.

Bill: Damn he's HOT!!! I wonder if he likes cigars???

Imagine? Let's just enjoy t... (Below threshold)
Roy Lofquist:

Imagine? Let's just enjoy this one.

"It depends on what the mea... (Below threshold)

"It depends on what the meaning of 'fart' is...."

Tipper sure looks like a "r... (Below threshold)

Tipper sure looks like a "red stater" in that plastic rain slicker.

W: "Don't mess with Arkansa... (Below threshold)

W: "Don't mess with Arkansas"

BC: ...so then I told Al, ... (Below threshold)

BC: ...so then I told Al, I said "Well, you don't have to have gotten a majority to sit up there with me, but you do have to have won!"

GEORGE BUSH: "Chelsea, now ... (Below threshold)

GEORGE BUSH: "Chelsea, now you gotta promise me you'll teach Jenna how to hold her liquor, ok? I'd 'preciate that."

Chelsea... That leather ski... (Below threshold)

Chelsea... That leather skirt filters a fart better than Hill's presumtive pant suit! OBTW, nice ass...

(...ok, so I'm not the first fart smeller!)


The Clintons respond to a r... (Below threshold)

The Clintons respond to a reporter's question: "But isn't a Presidential Library about historic values and scholarship, not self-aggrandizement and serving as a springboard for Hillary's Presidential campaign?"

Everyone laughs when Jimmy ... (Below threshold)
Jim Hines:

Everyone laughs when Jimmy Carter suggests he has an idea to deal with the Iranian nuclear weapons crisis.

"Mr. President in honor of... (Below threshold)
Rodney Dill:

"Mr. President in honor of your visit to the dedication of my library I'd like to present you with a very special gift. A copy of the very first play written by my daughter, Chelsea, about a rancher that raised lambs for mutton. The play is a written in an unorthodox manner as it starts with Act III and proceeds to Act I."
"Mr. Clinton, I'm honored, and... and... Oh, Damn, I told you not to mess with Texas. You just want me to have Unnatural Acts with a Sheep."

"Oh my God, John Kerry wore... (Below threshold)

"Oh my God, John Kerry wore his Lucky Hat!"

Hey lets laugh at the 1 ter... (Below threshold)

Hey lets laugh at the 1 termers! HAHAHAHAHA

Wee! This is actually fun!... (Below threshold)

Wee! This is actually fun! Hey, man, who brought the raisins?

And then I said, "yeah? wel... (Below threshold)

And then I said, "yeah? well, global test this!".

President Bush- "So Mary Po... (Below threshold)

President Bush- "So Mary Poppins checks into a hotel and orders cauliflower, eggs, and swiss cheese. The next day, as she checks out of the hotel, the desk clerk asks her how she enjoyed her meal.

"Well," she replies, "The cauliflower was good, and so was the cheese, but the eggs weren't very tasty."

After being directed to the suggestion box, she writes something down on a piece of paper, puts it in, grabs her umbrella, and leaves.

The desk clerk's very curious about what she wrote. So he grabs the paper out of the suggestion box, and looks.

He reads: Supercauliflowercheesebuteggswerequiteatrociuos."

What the HELL was that Yank... (Below threshold)

What the HELL was that Yankee thinkin'?

GW:"I heard that so... (Below threshold)

GW:"I heard that some the 'lamest' of the Wizbag Caption Contest entrants don't even use umbrellas..they just wear ladies panties on their heads !"

BC:"HaHaHa..Ladies panties..HaHaHa"


CC:"What's a wizbang?"

Despite the fact that he re... (Below threshold)

Despite the fact that he really didn't get the joke, Dubya laughed heartily along anyway.

Before our caption, Rick13,... (Below threshold)

Before our caption, Rick13, as a native of Arkansas and Little Rock, I'd like you to read and interpret the following: F#CK YOU, you clearly ignorant $hit.

Now for our caption....

And that John Kerry fella....Heh, and y'all called my daddy a flip flopper!

There was a round of nervou... (Below threshold)

There was a round of nervous laughter when W offered Chelsea a job as a White House intern...

Just then, as they all laug... (Below threshold)

Just then, as they all laughed for the cameras, George W. pulled the lever causing the trap doors to open,swallowing the entire Clinton family at the site of their legacy.

GWB: "Bridge to the 21st ce... (Below threshold)

GWB: "Bridge to the 21st century my ass" "You fooled em bubba"

W: "Hey, nice trailer house... (Below threshold)

W: "Hey, nice trailer house!"

W: "Hey, isn't that that Mo... (Below threshold)

W: "Hey, isn't that that Monica gal in the front row there?"

W: "So then Chelsea says to... (Below threshold)

W: "So then Chelsea says to her mom, 'Not according to Dad I'm not."

Hey Bill, Chelsea says she ... (Below threshold)

Hey Bill, Chelsea says she wants to be an intern.

My father told me to be nic... (Below threshold)

My father told me to be nice...

W: Secretary of Agriculture... (Below threshold)

W: Secretary of Agriculture is still open...what'd ya say?

Women find camera, asshole... (Below threshold)
Steel Turman:

Women find camera, asshole sees what the women
are doing, man ignores camera and smiles at folks.

We're not laughing at you, ... (Below threshold)

We're not laughing at you, we're laughing with you, Mr. President.

The whoopie cushion on the ... (Below threshold)

The whoopie cushion on the President's seat would have been funny by itself, but Bill got Chelsea to pull his finger just as Bush was sitting down. Even Bush had to admit they got him good.

Ofr course, Chelsea's draft notice arrived in the mail the next day...

Wowhohohow, they actually s... (Below threshold)

Wowhohohow, they actually showed up, how about that! Tell Vladnits we don't need him.

W: So, the guy walks to th... (Below threshold)

W: So, the guy walks to the end of the bar and sits down next to Mary Cheney, and says,
"So, what part of lesbia are you from?"

Everyone got a good laugh w... (Below threshold)

Everyone got a good laugh when the President mentioned the rumor Senator Kerry planned on introducing a bill next session.


W's dry humor cracked up the crowd when he mentioned the FDA was planning to approve gin soaked raisins as a cure for Post Election Stress Trauma, also known as Kedwards Disease.

even a cleansing rain from ... (Below threshold)

even a cleansing rain from God can't rid the taint of the Clintons

even a cleansing rain from ... (Below threshold)

even a cleansing rain from God can't rid the taint of the Clintons

Kerry at the podium:... (Below threshold)

Kerry at the podium:
I'm John Kerry and I'm reporting for duty!

W: yea to loser-ville!

W: By the Power of Greysku... (Below threshold)

W: By the Power of Greyskull...I have the Power!

GWB: "I did not fart with ... (Below threshold)

GWB: "I did not fart with those Presidents!"

Weebls wobble but they don'... (Below threshold)

Weebls wobble but they don't fall down.

Feeling uncomfortabl... (Below threshold)

Feeling uncomfortable with the rain-soaked silence of the other VIP's,'W'decides to lighten the mood with his Tatoo(Fantasy Island) impression : "Zee Plane, Boss..Zee Plane" !

I thought Daddy was somethi... (Below threshold)

I thought Daddy was something, but the Vice President's thingy really is something else!

The Clintons look on in lau... (Below threshold)

The Clintons look on in laughter as W.'s umbrella turns inside out, leaving the president drenched. Bill reportedly quipped about "divine inser...no, I mean intervention."

Clinton to himself: wonder ... (Below threshold)

Clinton to himself: wonder if W would let have his two daughters for the night....hell he could even have Hilary and Chelsea in return!"

I vote for Cyberludite's ca... (Below threshold)

I vote for Cyberludite's caption

CC: Fellatio in ... (Below threshold)

CC: Fellatio in the rain ... leaves no stain ...

Bill: "This is the wettest... (Below threshold)

Bill: "This is the wettest I've been since the Whitehouse, if ya'll catch my drift."






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