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Weekend Caption Contest™

It's Friday, which means it's time for the Wizbang Weekend Caption Contest™. Enter your best caption for the following photo:

The redesigned shuttle fuel tank is transported to a barge in New Orleans, Friday morning Dec. 31, 2004. The redesigned fuel tank, a massive vessel that supplies propellant for the launch of the space shuttle, is beginning a barge trip across the Gulf of Mexico to the launch site on Florida's east coast. (AP Photo/Bill Haber)

Update: Winners finally announced! Comments are now closed.

Comments (145)

Michael Moore's suppository... (Below threshold)

Michael Moore's suppository is readied for delivery.

"Damn, Dick Cheney is such ... (Below threshold)
Rodney Dill:

"Damn, Dick Cheney is such a show off."

The new featured ride at Do... (Below threshold)

The new featured ride at Dollywood is so realistic, Russ Meyers returns from the dead.

"Let's see Justin Timberlak... (Below threshold)
Rodney Dill:

"Let's see Justin Timberlake rip this sucker off!"

Visitors were surprised to ... (Below threshold)

Visitors were surprised to see that the cigar exhibit at President Clinton's new library had been changed unexpectedly to the new Hooters Hall of Fame.

Is that Michael Moore's nex... (Below threshold)

Is that Michael Moore's next movie up on that trailer, or is it just glad to see me?

Donald Rumsfeld is definite... (Below threshold)
Rodney Dill:

Donald Rumsfeld is definitely overcompensating for something with the new Bunker Buster Bomb.

Pentagon Voice-Over:... (Below threshold)

Pentagon Voice-Over: "...and the best thing about this new weapon is that it runs forever on just two 'D' batteries."

Like MOAB for New Year's.</... (Below threshold)
Paul Thornton:

Like MOAB for New Year's.

MOAF.....Mother Of All Fireworks

After masterminding Bush's ... (Below threshold)

After masterminding Bush's successful 2004 re-election bid, Karl Rove is understandably proud of himself.

Dang it McGehee, OneDrummer... (Below threshold)
Rodney Dill:

Dang it McGehee, OneDrummer and I had a caption "Dualing Banjos" thing going there. Minus the imbreeding thing, of course. (Not that I mind the competition.)

Wow, those hooter pilots ca... (Below threshold)

Wow, those hooter pilots can fly anything.

The Bill Clinton Library "M... (Below threshold)

The Bill Clinton Library "Monica's Right Breast" display draws a small crowd.

A federal appeals court thr... (Below threshold)

A federal appeals court threw out a judge's ruling that awarded $88.5 million to Anna Nicole Smith from her late husbands estate. But in a sharp turn of events, the court ruled that Ms. Smith could retain the luxurious love nest J. Howard Marshall built for her while they were courting.

Your new vibrator is here, ... (Below threshold)

Your new vibrator is here, Ms. Hilton!

Inspired by seeing the Spru... (Below threshold)

Inspired by seeing the Spruce Goose in the new movie about Howard Hughes, Oscar Meyer gets bold with their new weinermobile design.

The French ready their next... (Below threshold)
Rodney Dill:

The French ready their next gift to the US, to in their view, complement the Statue of Liberty.

"God D**n it, why should... (Below threshold)
Rodney Dill:

"God D**n it, why should Haliburton get the Ketchup contract for that sucker." -- Teresa Heinz Kerry.

On display at the county fa... (Below threshold)

On display at the county fair this weekend - the Minnesota State Boob.

As seen in this pre-electio... (Below threshold)
Doug Mcgie:

As seen in this pre-election photo; No one wanted to get too close to the "Kerry Express", for fear it it would surely suffer the same fate as the Hindenburg.

Hindrocket's.... (Below threshold)


"We've got another wardrobe... (Below threshold)

"We've got another wardrobe malfunction!!! It's a wardrobe malfunction!!! Every man for himself!!!"

FCC investigators seem some... (Below threshold)

FCC investigators seem somewhat troubled while viewing the float being prepared for the 2005 Super Bowl halftime show.

(Not that I mind the com... (Below threshold)

(Not that I mind the competition.)

Obviously I'm not trying hard enough.

A nipple clamp demonstratio... (Below threshold)
Paul Phillips:

A nipple clamp demonstration at the alt.sex Expo.

Sorry Dad, I could only zoo... (Below threshold)

Sorry Dad, I could only zoom out far enough to get Anna Nicole Smith's right boob in the picture.

When I said "scale model", ... (Below threshold)

When I said "scale model", I did not mean a one-to-one scale...

Although he thought his bit... (Below threshold)

Although he thought his bitchin' blue jump suit would get him into her pants, her body language made Jim suddenly realized "PenisWorld" was not the best place to take a first date.

Jan Egeland, the United Nat... (Below threshold)

Jan Egeland, the United Nations Under-Secretary-General for Humanitarian Affairs and Emergency Relief Co-ordinator, announces that Norway is sending help with relief efforts in SE Asia.

Tara Reid undergoes yet ano... (Below threshold)

Tara Reid undergoes yet another breast augmentation surgery this week.

Well-wishers await the dedi... (Below threshold)

Well-wishers await the dedication of the Clinton Presidential Library's "Lewinsky Wing."

Super Bowl sponsor Goodyear... (Below threshold)

Super Bowl sponsor Goodyear promises this year's halftime show will be even bigger and better than last year's.

They've finally discovered ... (Below threshold)

They've finally discovered a bigger d*ck than Sidney Blumenthal.

"Okay, this time Britney's ... (Below threshold)

"Okay, this time Britney's gone too far!"

"And in today's business ne... (Below threshold)

"And in today's business news, a disturbing new competitor to Richard Branson's Virgin empire has emerged..."

The new Viagra zeppelin is ... (Below threshold)

The new Viagra zeppelin is unveiled in New York's Central Park.

Pamela Anderson's Celebrity... (Below threshold)

Pamela Anderson's Celebrity Library opened today...

"Tonight, on a very special... (Below threshold)

"Tonight, on a very special episode of 'The Swan'..."

"So I asked my doctor about... (Below threshold)

"So I asked my doctor about Viagra...."

The flagship of the Royal D... (Below threshold)

The flagship of the Royal Dutch Air Force.

"I don't know---do YOU thin... (Below threshold)

"I don't know---do YOU think they're real?"

Janet has another "wardrobe... (Below threshold)

Janet has another "wardrobe malfunction"

"I love it too, Bill, but H... (Below threshold)

"I love it too, Bill, but Hillary's people say the double-wide design's just way more appropriate for a library..."

The FCC has announced that ... (Below threshold)

The FCC has announced that it will fine NASA a record-breaking $1 billion; the space agency could not be reached for comment.

The most popular attraction... (Below threshold)

The most popular attraction at the Clinton Presidential Library!

Meanwhile, a large package ... (Below threshold)

Meanwhile, a large package arrived today from Pakistan addressed to President Bush.

Despite size, concert crowd... (Below threshold)
Ray Midge:

Despite size, concert crowd indifferent to the newly solo career of Ms. Jackson's left breast.

Sally loved her new piercin... (Below threshold)
Jeff P:

Sally loved her new piercing but the downside is it became infected.

Oscar Mayer unveils its new... (Below threshold)

Oscar Mayer unveils its new Weinermobile, updated for the 21st Century.

Ringo Starrs' ship finally ... (Below threshold)

Ringo Starrs' ship finally comes in

people leave the largest bo... (Below threshold)

people leave the largest boob job ever display in topeka, Kansas realizing that it really was fake..

Billy, just how much water ... (Below threshold)

Billy, just how much water does your new super soaker hold?

The Clinton Library unveils... (Below threshold)

The Clinton Library unveils its latest attraction dedicated to the breast, like all other Clinton programs it was well over budget and full of hot air.

Prior to the last vice pres... (Below threshold)
Steve L.:

Prior to the last vice presidential debate, John Edwards' hair spray arrives.

The interceptor for Bush's ... (Below threshold)
jack rudd:

The interceptor for Bush's "Son of Star Wars" turned out to be larger than anticipated.

The DoD spokesman wr... (Below threshold)
jack rudd:

The DoD spokesman wryly remarked, "Bin Laden can run, but he can't hide."

"The press just THOU... (Below threshold)
jack rudd:

"The press just THOUGHT we were buying $600 hammers."

Seconds later a dozen peopl... (Below threshold)

Seconds later a dozen people drowned when the giant tit began lactating.

Karl Rove quietly re... (Below threshold)
jack rudd:

Karl Rove quietly remarked, "We strongly suggest one more recount in the Washington election for governor."

Dick Cheney's earlie... (Below threshold)
jack rudd:

Dick Cheney's earlier problem had grown to serious proportions.

(With apologies to Woody Al... (Below threshold)

(With apologies to Woody Allen):

"Be careful, these things usually travel in pairs!!!"

Behold! The Barry Bonds edi... (Below threshold)

Behold! The Barry Bonds edition of the Wienermobile.

If only it were laughing ga... (Below threshold)

If only it were laughing gas...

Confused from his recent st... (Below threshold)

Confused from his recent stroke, Dick Clark instructed workers to drop something other than a ball during Times Squares New Year's Eve Rockin' Eve.

Wonder how many batteries i... (Below threshold)

Wonder how many batteries it takes?...

After spending the entire d... (Below threshold)

After spending the entire day looking for the perfect hat, Homer Simpson took a well deserved nap.

And it's Anna Nichole Smith... (Below threshold)

And it's Anna Nichole Smith ahead by....

Bomb? What bomb?... (Below threshold)

Bomb? What bomb?

This proves that liberals l... (Below threshold)

This proves that liberals love the tsunami.

Reminiscent of the 2000 ele... (Below threshold)

Reminiscent of the 2000 election, a group of visitors to the Al Gore museum walk away unimpressed with the former Vice President's concept of a Social Security Lock Box.

Two Questions; Does it have... (Below threshold)

Two Questions; Does it have milk in it? and if yes, Where's a ladder?

"FrankenBoob"... (Below threshold)


Pfizer recalls Viagra after... (Below threshold)
Carl Smith:

Pfizer recalls Viagra after acknowledging a printing error. Labels were accidentally printed with 1000mg recommended dose instead of 100mg.

Enthusiasm for Hydrogen pow... (Below threshold)

Enthusiasm for Hydrogen powered vehicles has quieted somewhat as more people have become aware of the size of their fuel tanks.

For erections lasting 4 hou... (Below threshold)

For erections lasting 4 hours or more, consult a physician immediately....

Cialis FAQ: What happen's i... (Below threshold)
Rodney Dill:

Cialis FAQ: What happen's if you don't seek medical attention, if the condition persists more than four hours?

A rare picture of (part of)... (Below threshold)

A rare picture of (part of) Eccentrica Gallumbits.

Do you think it will hurt w... (Below threshold)

Do you think it will hurt when it goes in?

"Having safely defused the ... (Below threshold)

"Having safely defused the bomb using blogger comments, WizBangers return to their beloved computers and blog."

it followed me home - can i... (Below threshold)

it followed me home - can i keep it?

"Oh honey, while I'm thinki... (Below threshold)

"Oh honey, while I'm thinking about it, be sure to pick up a gallon of milk at the store."

Anna Nicole Smith's latest ... (Below threshold)

Anna Nicole Smith's latest breast augmentation goes terribly awry.

Dammit, that fatso in front... (Below threshold)

Dammit, that fatso in front drank all the milk.

Explained later as just an ... (Below threshold)

Explained later as just an innocent typo, DOD employees are stupified by the arrival of a 20-ton bunker-busting boob.

Deep in depression after No... (Below threshold)

Deep in depression after Nov. 2, Michael Moore orders one last Twinkie.

Upon release from the Venet... (Below threshold)

Upon release from the Venetian spacecraft, male abductees reported that the experiments were generally satisfying. One added that he could repeat it after a smoke and a 2-hour nap.

Shortly after this photo wa... (Below threshold)

Shortly after this photo was taken, the FCC fined NASA $50 million.

Presenting his stupendous m... (Below threshold)

Presenting his stupendous model and white-paper titled "circumcision is a gigantic decision," Dr. Dick Cutter was mostly disparaged by his peers at the annual pediatricians' convention.

No O rings on this sucker.<... (Below threshold)

No O rings on this sucker.

In a surprising twist of fa... (Below threshold)

In a surprising twist of fate Janet Jackson was crushed to death by her prosthetics and accompanying jewelry.

NASA workers walk away disa... (Below threshold)

NASA workers walk away disappointed after discovering that this was not the new main shuttle tank, but a life size mockup of the 2004 election results suppository experienced by DNC Head Terry McAuliffe.

Some merely ignored him, bu... (Below threshold)

Some merely ignored him, but to those who would listen, Sheldon vehemently insisted that he isn't troubled by his receding hairline, and no, he is not "compensating".

We are **so** busted by the... (Below threshold)

We are **so** busted by the FCC...

UN weapons inspectors walk ... (Below threshold)
AbuDaood Wolfson:

UN weapons inspectors walk away satisfied after Iranian officials show them another spice grinder, this one for cardamon.

Pilot Bob Smith refuses to ... (Below threshold)

Pilot Bob Smith refuses to take one more flight in the Ex-Lax blimp.

DRUDGE BREAKING: Wizbang... (Below threshold)
Rodney Dill:

DRUDGE BREAKING: Wizbang's new Google bomb ensures that a large proportion of penis and boob queries will be directed to Kevin's site.

In a last-ditch effort to r... (Below threshold)

In a last-ditch effort to regain readership, Nick Coleman unveils his answer to Hindrocket and The Big Trunk.

AP BREAKING: The Big Boo... (Below threshold)
Rodney Dill:

AP BREAKING: The Big Boob Award, presented to Florida, by the council of Governors, subsequent to the 2000 Elections, is prepared for shipment to the state of Washington.

The Lyrics to Baby Got B... (Below threshold)
Rodney Dill:

The Lyrics to Baby Got Back by Sir Mix-A-Lot are finally understood.

Tourists to the Museum of L... (Below threshold)

Tourists to the Museum of Liberalism get an eyeful of the exemplary exhibit The Giant Government Nipple Solution.

It looks like a huge cigar,... (Below threshold)

It looks like a huge cigar, not a huge penis or a huge boob. Get your heads out of the gutter.

So my headline is:

Sexually frustrated Americans mistake huge cigar for huge penis.

CNN Reports Breaking News</... (Below threshold)

CNN Reports Breaking News

Vice President Dick Cheney announced today that he will run for the Republican Presidential canidate in 2008. The caption on the side of the apparently oversized penis shaped object will read.

" Dick...He's Not Just For Breakfast Anymore!!!"

"...and the condom on it sa... (Below threshold)

"...and the condom on it says medium!"

Depressed over Susan Sontag... (Below threshold)

Depressed over Susan Sontag's death, Annie Leibowitz throws their favorite toy out to the curb.

Officials stated tha... (Below threshold)

Officials stated that as a final order before leaving office, John Ascroft demanded the enormous breastlike object have a well defined and solidly constructed pastie placed over the obviously obscene nipple. The move was applauded by Jerry Falwell and the Bush Administration.

Judges at the Tournament of... (Below threshold)

Judges at the Tournament of Roses parade disqualify the entry from The Body Shop on Sunset Strip as volunteers walk away disappointed.

"We all live in a yellow su... (Below threshold)

"We all live in a yellow submarine".

Janet Jackson, eat your hea... (Below threshold)

Janet Jackson, eat your heart out baby!

One of Pamela Anderson's ne... (Below threshold)

One of Pamela Anderson's new implants arrives already equipped with a Janet Jackson inspired nipple ring and chain.

...there's nothing like a l... (Below threshold)

...there's nothing like a large Havana after a bit of stingy relief giving!

Ok, which one of you "despe... (Below threshold)

Ok, which one of you "desperate housewives" ordered this?

Democrats await the arrival... (Below threshold)

Democrats await the arrival of school buses for the first annual "Giant Condom Festival." A crane, operated by former President Bill Clinton, will lift the giant condom into place for the worlds largest safe sex demonstration.

Representatives from Guinness World Records are expected to attend.

"We have to show them how to do it," said event spokesperson Paris Hilton.

Speaking on condition of anonymity, inside sources say to expect a shocking French kiss involving Paris Hilton and former Surgeon General Dr. Jocelyn Elders.

After the tragic demise of ... (Below threshold)

After the tragic demise of the Oil For Food program, UN bureaucrats leap at the chance to suckle lifestyle-saving nourishment from the large teat of tsumani relief funds.

Xorba the Dalamite never di... (Below threshold)

Xorba the Dalamite never did figure out why all the human men loved her, while the human woman despised her.

"Now THIS should raise brea... (Below threshold)

"Now THIS should raise breast cancer awareness bigtime!"

Casting call for the remake... (Below threshold)

Casting call for the remake of "Attack of the 50-Foot Woman".

"Felcher, you idiot! I sai... (Below threshold)

"Felcher, you idiot! I said 'giant rocket TUBES'!"

"Hello? My eyes are up he... (Below threshold)

"Hello? My eyes are up here, buddy!"

The maiden flight of The... (Below threshold)

The maiden flight of The Hindenboob. Oh, the humanity!

"Other fellas might answer ... (Below threshold)

"Other fellas might answer differently, but I'm drawn to the smile first..."

Forget the mammogram! We'll... (Below threshold)
Larry K.:

Forget the mammogram! We'll just go with breast self examinations.

The Kennedymobile tools aro... (Below threshold)

The Kennedymobile tools around Martha's Vineyard.

"I suppose this is what we ... (Below threshold)

"I suppose this is what we get for selling the painting rights to Larry Flynt..."

"Oh, don't worry---I think ... (Below threshold)

"Oh, don't worry---I think we'll be able to figure out where we parked it."

"The only hitch is the pito... (Below threshold)

"The only hitch is the pitot tube tends to fall off whenever we get a frigid crosswind..."

After another change in siz... (Below threshold)

After another change in size, we are forced to ask the eternal question once more: Just how big are Brittney Spears' boobs? Really?

d'oh. change the question ... (Below threshold)

d'oh. change the question mark after boobs to a comma, and include "really" in the sentence.

How much Viagra?... (Below threshold)

How much Viagra?

Sometimes a phallic yellow ... (Below threshold)

Sometimes a phallic yellow fuel tank with a Prince Albert is just a phallic yellow fuel tank with a Prince Albert.

Tragically, the giant baby ... (Below threshold)

Tragically, the giant baby was never located.

Moments later the rest of M... (Below threshold)

Moments later the rest of Miss Parton came into view.

Remember, only take Viagra ... (Below threshold)

Remember, only take Viagra in the dosage prescribed by your physician.

In related news, France sur... (Below threshold)

In related news, France surrenders.

Tired of searching for indi... (Below threshold)

Tired of searching for individual terrorists, the U.S. has decided to nuke the planet.

After a rejuvinating Christ... (Below threshold)

After a rejuvinating Christmas Holiday at the Crawford Texas ranch, the President prepares to unveil a Social Security bail-out proposal that even most Democrats can support....!

Emboldened by recent court ... (Below threshold)

Emboldened by recent court victories and supportive critical reviews, a coalition of Hollywood producers makes final preparations for the theatrical release of a Janet Jackson inspired musical, "Titty Titty Bang Bang"...

AP BREAKING - The National ... (Below threshold)
Rodney Dill:

AP BREAKING - The National Organization of Women (NOW) today announced their response to the emergence of Viagra as a Male sex life enhancer. Asked by a female reporter if the device would enhance a woman's natural lubrication, a NOW spokesperson responded, 'No, it simply rolls over and crushes the male."

The crowd did not approve o... (Below threshold)

The crowd did not approve of Janet Jackson's recent weight gain.
What do you get when you cross Janet Jackson with Anna Nicole Smith?

Filming begins for Woody Al... (Below threshold)

Filming begins for Woody Allen's "Everything You Ever Wanted to Know About Sex II: The Revenge".

"Houston, we have a problem... (Below threshold)

"Houston, we have a problem!"

The TV series "Third Rock f... (Below threshold)

The TV series "Third Rock from the Sun" returns on cable, this time with the Big Giant Head replaced by the Big Giant Boob.

(Which may explain why the thing looks, as Jonathan noticed, like the top of Homer Simpson's head.)

Giant bullet makes the Guin... (Below threshold)
Ignacio Marco:

Giant bullet makes the Guinness World Record. Controversy makes news about who will be given credit for it. DU said Palmela Anderson might win the credit, we at New York Times support DU reaserch conclusion.

Due to the row caused by th... (Below threshold)
Rodney Dill:

Due to the row caused by the attempted body cavity search of Barbra Streisand, Abdul was able to simply walk past Airport security with his carry-on luggage.

Here we see a scene from ye... (Below threshold)

Here we see a scene from yet another Hollywood movie remake. This time it's Woody Allen's "Everything You Always Wanted To Know About Sex, But Were Afraid To Ask"

Update: <a href="htt... (Below threshold)

Update: Winners finally announced! Comments are now closed.






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