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Wizbang Weekend Caption Contest™

It's Friday, which means it's time for the Wizbang Weekend Caption Contest™. Enter your best caption for the following picture:

Detail of a pair of silicone breast implants is seen in this file photo. The Australian military Sunday defended its decision to pay for some female sailors to have breast implants, saying the operations were not carried out for cosmetic reasons.(AFP/File/Mauricio Lima)

Winners will be announced Monday morning, as will the winners from last week's contest which was delayed due to our server meltdown last weekend.

Update: Winners announced. Click on the link to read the winning entries. The contest is now closed. A new edition of the Weekend Caption Contest™ will debut Friday morning.


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Comments (131)

Even though they are used f... (Below threshold)

Even though they are used for breast implants, a RNC donor tells the US Senate to grow a pair

breast.caption.contest.ever... (Below threshold)


Bill Clinton's fake tear du... (Below threshold)
retired military:

Bill Clinton's fake tear ducts undergoing their weekly replacment.

However, Hillary's butt-che... (Below threshold)

However, Hillary's butt-cheek implants had to be delivered by forklift.

The latest additions to Hil... (Below threshold)
retired military:

The latest additions to Hillary Clinton's testicle lock box.

Doctors prepare to implant ... (Below threshold)
retired military:

Doctors prepare to implant Hillary's nuticles so that she can appear tougher on defense issues.

What remained after everyth... (Below threshold)

What remained after everything fake was removed from Nancy Pelosi.

Prosecutors displayed evide... (Below threshold)

Prosecutors displayed evidence taken from a defendant in the Hooters fraud case.

OJ was unsuccessful in retr... (Below threshold)

OJ was unsuccessful in retrieving further Nicole Simpson memorabilia.

A latest study in the symme... (Below threshold)

A latest study in the symmetrical design of artificial intelligence.

Anything more than a handfu... (Below threshold)

Anything more than a handful is a waste, but a pinch?

EBay President and CEO Meg ... (Below threshold)

EBay President and CEO Meg Whitman displays the auction site's latest item for bid, Rep. Dennis Kucinich's empty nutsack.

A pre-surgery titty-twister... (Below threshold)
Jim in Cleveland:

A pre-surgery titty-twister.

Dyslexic Australian Procure... (Below threshold)
Senor Cardgage:

Dyslexic Australian Procurement Officer: "I'm sorry sir, I thought I was ordering cluster BOMBS."

Look, democrats!... (Below threshold)

Look, democrats!

Hey, what happened to the r... (Below threshold)

Hey, what happened to the rest of Pamela Anderson?

Thanks to Bill's non-stop l... (Below threshold)
Baron Von Ottomatic:

Thanks to Bill's non-stop lobbying, Hillary's new health care plan guaranteed women a right to choose one elective surgery procedure...

I'm told they look much bet... (Below threshold)

I'm told they look much better when they're being worn.

Al Gore displays proof of <... (Below threshold)
Lindy R. Dole:

Al Gore displays proof of Globular Warming.

Breast augmentation arrivin... (Below threshold)

Breast augmentation arriving a week too late to rescue a disappointing "Oktoberfest" edition of Wizbang Weekend Caption Contest.

In Hollywood, this is the d... (Below threshold)

In Hollywood, this is the difference between an actress and a talented actress.

Would you like to super-siz... (Below threshold)
Baron Von Ottomatic:

Would you like to super-size your order for an extra dollar?

Doing what the democrats do... (Below threshold)

Doing what the democrats do best, the golden cow is now merely a golden steer.

Hsu-lifts ... (Below threshold)


I think TSA security screen... (Below threshold)

I think TSA security screening has finally gone a little too far.

There are some things you j... (Below threshold)

There are some things you just don't want to know about your Mom's autopsy.

Don't-ask-don't-tell, Austr... (Below threshold)

Don't-ask-don't-tell, Australian Rules.

GM saw sales soar after rep... (Below threshold)
Baron Von Ottomatic:

GM saw sales soar after replacing the driver's side air bags in all their vehicles with driver's side fun bags.

Ted Kennedy prepares to dow... (Below threshold)

Ted Kennedy prepares to down a couple of Chivas Jello shots.

Good God! No wonder Bill's ... (Below threshold)

Good God! No wonder Bill's been so quiet. Hillary had him neutered!

It was all forensic teams c... (Below threshold)
Baron Von Ottomatic:

It was all forensic teams could recover after Ahmadinejad tried to force his way through the assembled throng to visit Ground Zero.

John Edwards applies his da... (Below threshold)

John Edwards applies his daily dose of Breck hair gel.

Apparently, this is some ki... (Below threshold)

Apparently, this is some kind of mind control device. But it only works on men.

Thanks for the mammaries!</... (Below threshold)

Thanks for the mammaries!

After his home run ball was... (Below threshold)

After his home run ball was destroyed, Barry Bonds Urine Samples enter the Hall of Fame.

The Academy of Motion Pictu... (Below threshold)

The Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Science unveils its new Oscar for Best Female in a "supporting" role.

Moveon takes another democr... (Below threshold)

Moveon takes another democrat "scalp".

CBS executives soon realize... (Below threshold)
Baron Von Ottomatic:

CBS executives soon realized there was only one sure way to boost Katie Couric's sagging, er um, ratings.

(Kevin thinking at 7:20 AM ... (Below threshold)

(Kevin thinking at 7:20 AM this morning): "At least I won't get a lot captions to judge with this Wizbang caption contest picture."

A favorite at the she-woman... (Below threshold)

A favorite at the she-woman man haters club is the testicle and hand puppet rendition of "Planet Earth" , the movie in which the "Women of Ruth" rule over the "Dink" (man) population.

Possible cure found for the... (Below threshold)
Jeff Blogworthy:

Possible cure found for the Republican leadership's timidity: silicon testicles.

oops. Pls correct: silicone... (Below threshold)
Jeff Blogworthy:

oops. Pls correct: silicone

The Senators from Massachus... (Below threshold)

The Senators from Massachusetts have a "Who's got the Bigger Booger" contest.

Dan Rather is claiming this... (Below threshold)

Dan Rather is claiming this is all that's left of the typewriter that proves Bush ducked out on his National Guard Commitment.

This is essence of bullshit... (Below threshold)

This is essence of bullshit. And congress is mainlining the stuff.

The U.S. government awarded... (Below threshold)
Jeff Blogworthy:

The U.S. government awarded a million dollar grant for a Massachusetts study to determine whether pinching the nipples of breast implants is as satisfying as the real thing.

Some emergency supplies for... (Below threshold)
pjo, a twin with twins:

Some emergency supplies for Gwyneth Paltrow for when the press shows up.

The newest recipient of a g... (Below threshold)

The newest recipient of a grant from the National Endowment of the Arts tries to choose which bag of urine to use in his latest work.

The market for recycled bre... (Below threshold)

The market for recycled breast implants was smaller than anticipated.

Moveon.org proudly display'... (Below threshold)

Moveon.org proudly display's the Democrat Party's nads.

A new advance in implant te... (Below threshold)

A new advance in implant technology, using naturally occurring sterile liquid: the urine filled implants.

"No, no, no.....that is NOT... (Below threshold)

"No, no, no.....that is NOT what I meant by tea bagging......."

For $20 you too can fondle ... (Below threshold)

For $20 you too can fondle Jenna Jameson's breasts.

Fake but accurate.... (Below threshold)

Fake but accurate.

Floyd Landis' attempt to sw... (Below threshold)

Floyd Landis' attempt to swap out his dirty pee with a clean sample before the drug test proved unsuccessful.

In another example of scien... (Below threshold)

In another example of science with no purpose, Ted Kennedy's urine was compared (unfavorably) to that of a hippopotamus.

Finally found - the missing... (Below threshold)

Finally found - the missing weapons of mass distraction.

Pillow talk.... (Below threshold)

Pillow talk.

And ROSIE O,DONNELL here we... (Below threshold)
spurwing plover:

And ROSIE O,DONNELL here we present you with you two new mean of looking less geeky

Padded cells.... (Below threshold)

Padded cells.

Yes, there's definitely som... (Below threshold)
Peter F.:

Yes, there's definitely something suspicious about Greg Landis' urine sample.

This little booby went to m... (Below threshold)

This little booby went to market, this little booby stayed home...

"Here FreedomFries, let me ... (Below threshold)
Son Of The Godfather:

"Here FreedomFries, let me take your tears away..."

Bill's shadow puppet perfor... (Below threshold)

Bill's shadow puppet performance of "bunny with a very runny nose" and "duck with ginormous earring bling" was received rather poorly.

Upon her demise, Helen Thom... (Below threshold)
Lindy R. Dole:

Upon her demise, Helen Thomas' pair had to be disposed of gingerly by HAZMAT personal.

Upon her demise, Helen Thom... (Below threshold)
Lindy R. Dole:

Upon her demise, Helen Thomas' pair had to be disposed of gingerly by HAZMAT personnel.

"Ms. Anderson, your breast ... (Below threshold)
Peter F.:

"Ms. Anderson, your breast reduction is going well. 2 down, only 22 more to go...."

Scrotum implants - High in ... (Below threshold)
Rachel Edith:

Scrotum implants - High in demand among all presidential contenders.

Anna Nicole Smith's Breast ... (Below threshold)

Anna Nicole Smith's Breast Implants Found Amongst Recovered O.J. Simpson Robbery Memorabilia

Holy D-Cup!!! The ... (Below threshold)

Holy D-Cup!!!

The Penguin has trapped Batman in a breast implant!

Miss Manners demonstrates t... (Below threshold)

Miss Manners demonstrates the proper way to carry testicle implants. Note how the pinkies are extended, and only the tips of the thumb and index finger make actual content with the implants.

Now, all the Republicans ha... (Below threshold)

Now, all the Republicans have to do is to persuade Hillary's doctor to use these implants filled with plastic explosives.

When Hillary discovered tha... (Below threshold)

When Hillary discovered that her cleavage got so much press, she decided to go all out!

In Soviet Russia, breasts i... (Below threshold)
rodney dill:

In Soviet Russia, breasts implant you

Evidence from the Hannibal ... (Below threshold)

Evidence from the Hannibal Lecter trials needed to be handled carefully.

Harry Reid takes his crania... (Below threshold)

Harry Reid takes his cranial implants out each night for cleaning before bedtime.

DARPA scientist holds up co... (Below threshold)

DARPA scientist holds up components of newest binary super-weapon, Essence of Dick Cheney and Squeezings of Chuck Norris.

Global warming effects on p... (Below threshold)

Global warming effects on polar bear urine:

1) above is pre-global warming
2) bottom is post.

Harry Reid presents Hillary... (Below threshold)

Harry Reid presents Hillary Clinton with two honorary brass balls for claiming she would be a credible commander-in-chief of the U.S. military.

Hillary Clinton at fundrais... (Below threshold)

Hillary Clinton at fundraisers' staff meeting:

"Here, hand some of these out to the boys in lieu of pay. Little horny devils, they'll love these."

Moveon's latest full-page N... (Below threshold)

Moveon's latest full-page NYT ad- "We OWN the Democrats!"

You remember the old saying... (Below threshold)

You remember the old saying- A boob in the hand is worth two in the bush...

The French hire expert mime... (Below threshold)
WebDiva Author Profile Page:

The French hire expert mime/juggler Henri Merlot to test Landis' urine sample by differential specific gravitas.

just when u thought you hea... (Below threshold)

just when u thought you heard the last of Monica Lewinski. Next week, will be Buttafuco week!

Scientists display the sili... (Below threshold)

Scientists display the silicone testicle implants that will be part of Senator Clinton's "Tough on Terror" makeover, which she will be undergoing in the months leading up to the general election.

Due to the military specifi... (Below threshold)

Due to the military specifications and extensive testing required, they each cost $32,768... and that is, of course, before they are implanted.

Which bag really<... (Below threshold)

Which bag really holds up under pressure?

We put the leading brands to the test!


In a blind squeeze test, ni... (Below threshold)

In a blind squeeze test, nine out of ten hetero American males prefer silicone over saline.

"I really felt that I had a handful with the silicone," stated Bill from Arkansas.

Man, look at the set on her... (Below threshold)
Anon Y. Mous:

Man, look at the set on her!

Silky Pony continues his (i... (Below threshold)
Apropos de Nada:

Silky Pony continues his (it's?) quest to be the most feminine Democratic hopeful.

It's too late Senator Reid,... (Below threshold)

It's too late Senator Reid, The whole country will know their fake!

They're only "funbags" afte... (Below threshold)

They're only "funbags" after. Until then, just bags.

A cosmetic surgeon displays... (Below threshold)

A cosmetic surgeon displays a pair of modest, B-cup-sized "sort-of-fun" bags.

Female member of Australian... (Below threshold)
Dodo David:

Female member of Australian Navy:
"Super-size me!"

John Edwards attempts to de... (Below threshold)
retired military:

John Edwards attempts to demonstrate his model of the two Americas using his solid gold paperweights.

Bottom hand - This is your... (Below threshold)
retired military:

Bottom hand - This is your bag of pee.

Top hand - This is your bag of pee on drugs.

"And this just in. Two mor... (Below threshold)
retired military:

"And this just in. Two more claimants of the Anna Nicole Smith fortune have come forward."

John Kerry displays his mag... (Below threshold)
retired military:

John Kerry displays his magic blobs of plastic explosives given to him by the SPEC OP guys in Vietnam.

Al Gore displays life size ... (Below threshold)
retired military:

Al Gore displays life size models of the Polar Ice Caps in the year 2040.

Pictured: Barack Obama's w... (Below threshold)

Pictured: Barack Obama's wife's removed breast implants. They weren't "black enough".

Now you want to know what i... (Below threshold)
Vegas Vic:

Now you want to know what it takes to be a "metrosexual"

Which will make a bigger im... (Below threshold)

Which will make a bigger impact: piss or honey? Just drop them over this balcony on the first politicians you see, and we'll find out!

Sensing a window of opportu... (Below threshold)

Sensing a window of opportunity, Bill Burkett holds a press conference to reveal conclusive proof that Lucy Ramirez was a real person.

And here we have the two bi... (Below threshold)
retired military:

And here we have the two biggest assets to the Republicans for the 2008 Presidential campaign.

Hillary Clinton and John Edwards.

Babs Streisand and Jane Fon... (Below threshold)
retired military:

Babs Streisand and Jane Fonda donate the best part of themselves to the DNC.

Keeping abreast of the late... (Below threshold)
Dodo David:

Keeping abreast of the latest fashions, the Australian Navy introduces new flotation devices for its female sailors.

Engineer Scott supervises S... (Below threshold)

Engineer Scott supervises Starfleet's retrofit of new anti-grav units.

Bush playing bomb Iran with... (Below threshold)

Bush playing bomb Iran with water balloons again.

HOOTERS ........ here I com... (Below threshold)
La Mano:

HOOTERS ........ here I come!

"If I can touch them, they ... (Below threshold)

"If I can touch them, they are REAL!"

The Royal Australian Navy r... (Below threshold)
Dodo David:

The Royal Australian Navy reveals evidence that it is the breast branch of the Australian Defence Force for a woman to be in.

During an episode of Dr. Ru... (Below threshold)

During an episode of Dr. Ruth, she stated, (using your best Dr. Ruth voice) "while performing fellatio, gently pinch the testicles to maximize his pleasure".

This photo demonstrates the moment Big Bertha realized she didn't know her own strength.

DIY... (Below threshold)


The Australian Navy spokesm... (Below threshold)

The Australian Navy spokesman was adamant: "For what we pay by buying in bulk from China, we save more than double that by not having to issue life vests to our female sailors who opted for the implants. Why even some of our brave bois have opted for the surgery, proving they are not cosmetic."

Hillary - "Here you can ha... (Below threshold)
retired military:

Hillary - "Here you can have these back for now Bill. Go round me up some votes."

Museum placard 2140 - This... (Below threshold)
retired military:

Museum placard 2140 - This picture shows President Hillary Clinton casually removing the gonads of the United States and thus caused the fall of what was once the greatest nation on earth.

Hillary Clinton demonstrate... (Below threshold)
retired military:

Hillary Clinton demonstrates to John Edwards what will happen to him if his wife doesn't shut up about Hillary's health care plan.

Hillary gives a pictorial r... (Below threshold)
retired military:

Hillary gives a pictorial representation of what will happen to people who don't sign up for her government sponsored health care plan.

Remember, when disposing of... (Below threshold)

Remember, when disposing of medical waste, the proper technique is always, pinkies up.

"No, no! I need an acety... (Below threshold)

"No, no! I need an acetylene filled can, not saline to fill my cans!"

When you know it's t... (Below threshold)

When you know it's time for new contact lenses.

"Hard Top, Hard Fits - F... (Below threshold)

"Hard Top, Hard Fits - Fake is how I'll take my Tits !" (Lyrics to new, "Fulla-Seltzer" implants, jingle)

Coming next spring: "Rocky ... (Below threshold)

Coming next spring: "Rocky 47 -Rocky gets a New Pair"

"Ah,bra-snapper,you may lea... (Below threshold)

"Ah,bra-snapper,you may leave,if you can snatch fake booby from my hand."

What 83% of ALL alimony goe... (Below threshold)

What 83% of ALL alimony goes for.

GETERLAID - Is it in you... (Below threshold)

GETERLAID - Is it in you ?

The New "Meatless" Pork cho... (Below threshold)
Vegas Vic:

The New "Meatless" Pork chop. Or as it is affectionately known as "Pork in a Pouch"

Forget balls. Give our worl... (Below threshold)

Forget balls. Give our world leaders breasts and the world will be a better place.

As a result of repeated law... (Below threshold)
retired military:

As a result of repeated lawsuits on the healthiness of it's food, McDonald's displays their new UNDERSIZE combo meals.

"OK class, which bag is ful... (Below threshold)

"OK class, which bag is full of monounsaturated fat and which is full of polyunsaturated fat?"

Update: <a href="ht... (Below threshold)

Update: Winners announced. Click on the link to read the winning entries. The contest is now closed. A new edition of the Weekend Caption Contest™ will debut Friday morning.






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Editors: Jay Tea, Lorie Byrd, Kim Priestap, DJ Drummond, Michael Laprarie, Baron Von Ottomatic, Shawn Mallow, Rick, Dan Karipides, Michael Avitablile, Charlie Quidnunc, Steve Schippert

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