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Eat your heart out Ted Turner

Exhibit 313 in why the founder of CNN has lost his mind.

Not doing it will be catastrophic. We'll be eight degrees hotter in ten, not ten but 30 or 40 years and basically none of the crops will grow. Most of the people will have died and the rest of us will be cannibals.
If you won't take my word, go to the Newsbusters link above. Brent Baker has the video.

I suggest Turner be cryogenically frozen immediately. Then woken up in 40 years and given a ketchup bottle. Any other non-profane smartass ideas?

Hat tip- Ann Althouse who says Turner has become a deranged old man.


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Comments (11)

"Turner has become a derang... (Below threshold)

"Turner has become a deranged old man". Turner is suffering from FDS. He was associated with Hanoi Jane for several years. That memory would drive anyone insane.
The only difference in Liberals and Cannibals is Cannibals only eat their enemies. (LBJ)

Bill,I think there... (Below threshold)
Upset Old Guy:


I think there is a case to be made for Ted (He Who Once Would Have Been President) always having been deranged. And now he's only BECOME old, like the rest of us do on a daily basis.

I've always enjoyed the story of Ted, at the head table of some gathering, drinking until he passed out face down in his plate. The person sitting next to him then grabbed a handful of Ted's hair, lifted his face out of the plate (replete with food adornments) and said to the others present, "Ladies and gentlemen, the next President of the United States". I'm pretty sure that story ran in Time Magazine, after the America's Cup defense and before Jane.

Ted says there are too many... (Below threshold)
Baron Von Ottomatic:

Ted says there are too many nuclear weapons and too many people on the planet. Am I the only one who sees the obvious solution to that particluar dilemma?

Let's send him to backwater North Korea and let him see what a real cannibal-level starvation catastrophe looks like.

Oddly, North Koreans aren't starving because of global warming but rather a lack of economic development. And thanks to our insane biofuel obsession we'll soon see that hunger spread around the globe as we fat Americans turn food into fuel for our autos.

The obvious solution would be to cut out the middle man and have Americans start riding horses everywhere again. But then there's the issue of horse flatulence - an even more dire grennhouse gas than CO2. There's just no easy solution!

Of course, Ted tours North Korean and sees a slender people riding bikes everywhere. America could use a man like Kim Jung il. And Mother Earth will thank you for it.

"We'll be eight degrees ... (Below threshold)
P. Bunyan:

"We'll be eight degrees hotter in ten, not ten but 30 or 40 years"

Ted's mind is surely slipping. He forgot that 10 years ago they were saying it would be 8 degrees hotter in ten years. Now that 10 years have passed and the globe has cooled over that time they're now saying 30 to 40 years from now. I can't really blame Turner though-- it is really hard to keep up with the constantly changing "settled science".

And BVO, Turner's been to N Korea. I heard him being interviewed after he got back. He said, "Everyone was skinny and riding around on bikes, but they looked prettty happy to me."

Here's a non-profane smarta... (Below threshold)

Here's a non-profane smartass idea:

In the interest of science he and his ex-harpy Hanoi Jane should be frozen together, then awakened in 40 years all alone on an island somehere in the Bering Sea (no namby pamby tropical island crap - we're talking Arctic Circle stuff here) - with that one ketchup bottle you were talking about between them. I'd like to see just how that works out.

They do that kind of thing with lab rats all the time.


He says that as if cannibal... (Below threshold)
The Listkeeper:

He says that as if cannibalism is a bad thing.


I knew he was crazy the min... (Below threshold)

I knew he was crazy the minute he married Jane Fonda.

How about we send him to North Korea blindfolded and drop him off with nothing but a bicycle and a string of hot dogs around his neck. Then we can send him to the Aleutian Islands with all those sea lions and see how he fairs there. Then we can send him back to North Korea's DMZ zone to play in that International Peace Park he advocated almost 3 years ago that he "anticipate[d] will be fairly soon".

Now THAT'S some reality TV I'd watch.

Well, considering we'll hav... (Below threshold)

Well, considering we'll have to keep things clean and "G" rated, I guess that puts the ol' kibosh on suggestions as to what Ted could do with that ketchup bottle.

I'll leave the rest to readers' imaginations. (a la the reason Alfred Hitchcock said he didn't display gruesome violence in his films, but rather had it occur off camera, that the viewer could mentally envision things far more grisly than he could ever portray on the screen.)

dum dee dum dee dum....

I agree with Upset Old Guy ... (Below threshold)

I agree with Upset Old Guy - the only reason Turner "has become a deranged old man" is the passing of time. A few years ago he was a deranged middle-aged man, and before that he was deranged young man.

Is this nutjob trying to up... (Below threshold)

Is this nutjob trying to upstage the Goracle? Or just drunk like a certain Kennedy and spattering phychobabble?

And Charlie Rose just sucks... (Below threshold)

And Charlie Rose just sucks it up as if dipsh*t Turner was explaining the workings of CNN.






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