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Wizbang Weekend Caption Contest™

It's Friday, which means it's time for the Wizbang Weekend Caption Contest™. Enter your best caption for the following picture:

A toilet with an Olympic sticker attached can be seen at the Olympic village in Beijing July 27, 2008. The heavily-guarded village, which will house 16,000 athletes and officials during next month's Beijing Games, was officially opened on Sunday under skies still grey with the pollution that China has promised to clear in time for the August 8-24 Games. REUTERS/David Gray (CHINA) (BEIJING OLYMPICS 2008 PREVIEW)

Winners will be announced Monday morning.

Update: Winners announced. Click the link to read the winning entries. The contest is now closed.


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Comments (102)

The men's gymnastics team l... (Below threshold)

The men's gymnastics team lodge a complaint againt the events organizers. ww

The new event: The enema li... (Below threshold)

The new event: The enema lift games. ww

Moments before the Opening ... (Below threshold)
Baron Von Ottomatic:

Moments before the Opening Ceremonies, China revealed its monument to human rights.

Astronomy Picture of The Da... (Below threshold)

Astronomy Picture of The Day -- Rings around Uranus

Squat, Clean, and Jerk.... (Below threshold)

Squat, Clean, and Jerk.

Because the urine from team... (Below threshold)
Baron Von Ottomatic:

Because the urine from team Russian would burn right through a regular toilet.

After hearing what he is fu... (Below threshold)
Yogurt Author Profile Page:

After hearing what he is full of, Chinese handlers hurriedly prepared for Obama's visit to the Olympics

For a real Olympic Movement... (Below threshold)

For a real Olympic Movement.

Like its generic counterpar... (Below threshold)
Baron Von Ottomatic:

Like its generic counterpart, female toilet gymnastics consistently draws higher ratings than the men's events.

The seniors parallel bars i... (Below threshold)

The seniors parallel bars is not for the squeamish.

You must be at least this t... (Below threshold)
Baron Von Ottomatic:

You must be at least this tall to ride the decadent Western-style toilet.

The IOC's request for a ven... (Below threshold)

The IOC's request for a venue for "running" events may not have been translated faithfully.

It has been customary for c... (Below threshold)
Maggie Mama:

It has been customary for countries to choose an Olympic mascot. In an attempt to prove it is the best at everything, China has chosen five "Fuwas"...this one was almost #6 until an American reporter commented on how appropriate it would be since Beijing is a shithole.

American Standard introduce... (Below threshold)

American Standard introduces the new Wide Stance Restricting Model, dubbed 'The Larry'.

Poop like an athlete with o... (Below threshold)

Poop like an athlete with our new Olympic Model crap catcher.

The Best Damn Metaphor Peri... (Below threshold)

The Best Damn Metaphor Period

"Where's the rosin?"... (Below threshold)

"Where's the rosin?"

With all the security surro... (Below threshold)

With all the security surrounding the Olympics - even the toilet lids were locked down.

Kohler - Official Sponsor o... (Below threshold)

Kohler - Official Sponsor of the 2008 Olympics

It's for a new demonstratio... (Below threshold)

It's for a new demonstration sport: the 15,000 meter Run, Shoot & Crap.

This years Olympics feature... (Below threshold)

This years Olympics features a new event, the Low Flow Double Flush.

The pooping events are expe... (Below threshold)

The pooping events are expected to be quite popular at this Olympics. Athletes are judged on volume and ability to hit a target. Extra points are sometimes given for special fragrance.

We know it isn't Obama's. I... (Below threshold)

We know it isn't Obama's. It isn't made of gold.

Gym(nasty)ics... (Below threshold)
sachxn Author Profile Page:


"...and the judges rewarded... (Below threshold)

"...and the judges rewarded him well for that one...8.5 for length, 9.0 for texture, and 9.0 for smell..."

Apparently, Larry Craig rea... (Below threshold)
No One of Consequence:

Apparently, Larry Craig really was preparing for the Olympics. Who knew?

Sums up my vision of this y... (Below threshold)

Sums up my vision of this year's games perfectly.

"We aim to please. You aim... (Below threshold)

"We aim to please. You aim too, please."

I always wondered how to st... (Below threshold)

I always wondered how to start working on the Iron Cross.

Chinese organizers recogniz... (Below threshold)

Chinese organizers recognize the true spirit of the Olympic Movement.

Under closer scrutiny of th... (Below threshold)

Under closer scrutiny of the IOC rules, it was discovered that the parallel bars had been performed incorrectly all these past years. The new event has been named Friedrich Jahn's Revenge.

"The Crappel Horse programs... (Below threshold)

"The Crappel Horse programs are usually very strenuous, and some of the dismounts can get pretty messy."

"Yeah, you'll choke on our ... (Below threshold)

"Yeah, you'll choke on our air and our water will melt your skin...but our toilets are spotless!! (Just be careful not to splash on yourself.)"

Hey, I heard the Olympics h... (Below threshold)

Hey, I heard the Olympics had gone downhill, but I didn't think that they'd really gone down the toilet!

Here's your chance to watch... (Below threshold)

Here's your chance to watch Mr Hanky go for the gold with a triple lindy.

Not exactly American Standa... (Below threshold)

Not exactly American Standard . . .

I don't think we're in Kans... (Below threshold)
Lindy R. Dole:

I don't think we're in Kansas anymore, Toto

"...and the judges... (Below threshold)
rodney dill:
"...and the judges rewarded him well for that one...8.5 for length, 9.0 for texture, and 9.0 for smell..."
...and he stuck the landing.
Going for the Gold!... (Below threshold)

Going for the Gold!

The new Olympic event gave ... (Below threshold)

The new Olympic event gave a whole new meaning to the phrase "stick the dismount."

I like the 'Now See Dung' m... (Below threshold)

I like the 'Now See Dung' model with waving Chairman better.

Just Do It... (Below threshold)

Just Do It

The People's toilets at the... (Below threshold)

The People's toilets at the Olympic village are not very private but they do come with an option of having the attendant gently clean your bottom. After finishing, simply stand, turn, and bend over using the rails for support and holler, "Du Poo!"

Finally, an Olympic event I... (Below threshold)

Finally, an Olympic event I can enter and take home the gold.

The 2008 Head Games... (Below threshold)

The 2008 Head Games

Considering the crap they u... (Below threshold)

Considering the crap they usually broadcast, NBC was surprised that the Synchronized Sh*tting event drew such poor ratings

Senator McCain's Olympic Cr... (Below threshold)

Senator McCain's Olympic Crapper...

Senator Obama's new rainbow... (Below threshold)

Senator Obama's new rainbow 'salute' suddenly started showing up everywhere.

"Welcome to China. Deposit... (Below threshold)

"Welcome to China. Deposit your Human Rights here."

"Look Senator Obama, they p... (Below threshold)

"Look Senator Obama, they put to many O's on your Toilet."

"Yeah, they forgot President, too."

First, there was competitiv... (Below threshold)
Baron Von Ottomatic:

First, there was competitive eating. Tune in this Fall on Fox as we give you an exclusive peek into what happens after the trophies are handed out.

"The Chinese team is hoping... (Below threshold)

"The Chinese team is hoping to flush the competition in the Crappel Horse this year by unveiling their new signature move, the Shiitake."

NBC: In the tank for Obama... (Below threshold)

NBC: In the tank for Obama. In the tank for Red China.

Worst...parallel bar routin... (Below threshold)
Master Shake:

Worst...parallel bar routine...ever!

"All your crap are belong t... (Below threshold)

"All your crap are belong to us!"

Those of you who have docum... (Below threshold)

Those of you who have documented disabilities, demonstrated by presenting Forms G, Q, and X to the door guard, may use our specially designed disability toilet.

Everyone else may use with pleasure the luxurious bucket seen on the right.

China's Olympic organizers ... (Below threshold)

China's Olympic organizers revealed for the first time today their state of the art gender test...

They force everyone to dring 2 gallons of black tea, and anyone who leaves the lid up is labeled "male".
They did hit a snag however with several of the Soviet female gymnasts who managed to hit a hole in one from across the room...

Government Executive Toilet... (Below threshold)

Government Executive Toilet.....$500
Custom Padded Precious PVC Hand Assists.....$25
Being First In Line out of the 16000 Athletes and Officials.....Priceless

Work has already commenced on the second one.

STD's not included... (Below threshold)

STD's not included

In People's Republic of Chi... (Below threshold)
Baron Von Ottomatic:

In People's Republic of China toilet flushes Yu.

Oh my god, that fortune coo... (Below threshold)
Baron Von Ottomatic:

Oh my god, that fortune cookie I got last night makes so much sense now...

The location for the new "W... (Below threshold)

The location for the new "Where have my civil rights gone?" competition in Beijing.

When Obamanomics set in, th... (Below threshold)
Dale A:

When Obamanomics set in, the GDP and stock market will be here. Hold on with both hands!

"No, it's not a public toil... (Below threshold)

"No, it's not a public toilet. It's The People's Toilet. Big difference."

Typical communist pro... (Below threshold)
DJ Drummond:

Typical communist project. Pipes going up, down, and all around, but none actually attached to make it really flush

Venue for newly approved Ol... (Below threshold)

Venue for newly approved Olympic event, the Turd Drop.

Handicap Toilet for use by ... (Below threshold)

Handicap Toilet for use by all handicapped Olympians! (Citizens Bank Park in Phila. has a mandated elevator for use by all handicapped relief pitchers!)

China's answer to th... (Below threshold)

China's answer to the old "superglue on the toilet" trick...

John? John Edwards? Are y... (Below threshold)

John? John Edwards? Are you in there?

John Edwards could not be r... (Below threshold)

John Edwards could not be reached for comment...

Chinese officials today rei... (Below threshold)

Chinese officials today reiterated their commitment to freedom of expression in public affairs by opening the first of many Suggestion Boxes for Political Reform.

Despite massive Chinese pre... (Below threshold)
retired military:

Despite massive Chinese preparation this year's Olympic coverage is the toilet.

The Chinese government quic... (Below threshold)
retired military:

The Chinese government quickly realized that holding the Olympics in their country was a big crap shoot.

The "thanks for a job well ... (Below threshold)

The "thanks for a job well done" to the Olympic Site Selection Committee

I completely understand. I... (Below threshold)

I completely understand. I stink on the parallel bars too.

Chinese "birthing station" ... (Below threshold)

Chinese "birthing station" for moms having girls.

"All right! I got home in t... (Below threshold)

"All right! I got home in time for the 'Quran-a-thon'!"

The last thing your plate o... (Below threshold)

The last thing your plate of "chow-fun" really saw.

Confucius say, "Crap in han... (Below threshold)

Confucius say, "Crap in hand and wish in other,no matter,you no get this beauty".

Confucius say, "When you no... (Below threshold)

Confucius say, "When you not know wrich wray to approach commode, you prease to have ingest real ancient Chinese seclet."

Freedom to worship: Pricele... (Below threshold)

Freedom to worship: Priceless
Freedom to protest: Priceless
What China thinks of these freedoms: They can't spare a (Tiananmen) square

Confucius say, "One who wri... (Below threshold)

Confucius say, "One who wrie down writh red Chinese,wrake up with new persplective on rife."

Confucius say, "Raugh and t... (Below threshold)

Confucius say, "Raugh and the world raughs writh you. Cly? Well, you obviousry in China my flend."

toilet: "Sen. Obama,what wo... (Below threshold)

toilet: "Sen. Obama,what would you do about Russia?"
BO: "I'm kinda busy sweetie,couldja keep it down?"

Didja hear the one about th... (Below threshold)

Didja hear the one about the Chinese islamist and the public ...tick,tick,tick

Confucius say, "Hey,Orympic... (Below threshold)

Confucius say, "Hey,Orympics happen."

In a blatent act of subvers... (Below threshold)

In a blatent act of subversion today,Chinese industry unvailed its new tool to keep American octogenarians actively gumming up US commerce. Dubbed "The Creeping Crapper" the new device has the covert community and everyone in State scrambling to devise harsh porcelain tariffs and crushing tp excise taxes.When asked his opinion, Sen. Bob "Sheets" Byrd said, "zzzzz,WHAT? Who's there? Bocephus? Isatchooboy? Come fetch me my slippers boy...zzzzz"

"Just Do It"<p... (Below threshold)

"Just Do It"

42. Posted by Porkopolis

I think you meant

"Just Poo it"

"The Olympics were marred b... (Below threshold)

"The Olympics were marred by the tragic drowning death of Simon Smythe during a complex dismount from The Olympic Pommel John."

Go (here) World.... (Below threshold)

Go (here) World.

Mr. Hu. It was the Soviets ... (Below threshold)

Mr. Hu. It was the Soviets who were supposed to tear down walls. Sheesh!

Chinese translaters mistake... (Below threshold)
retired military:

Chinese translaters mistakenly thought that Barrack had already won the Presidential election and thus designed the official President Obama Presidential Seal for his upcoming visit.

"Just ... (Below threshold)
"Just Do It"

42. Posted by Porkopolis

I think you meant

"Just Poo it"

88. Posted by Headzero

"Just Do Do It" ?

Brilliant! All that, and t... (Below threshold)

Brilliant! All that, and they still couldn't figure out how to hang a toilet-paper roll?

Optional for the gymnast wi... (Below threshold)

Optional for the gymnast with a problem dismount.

Chinese authorities insist ... (Below threshold)

Chinese authorities insist Western-style toilet stalls are not bugged: "Everyone can see there is no invasion of privacy."

Unfortunately Wong's Pu-Pu ... (Below threshold)

Unfortunately Wong's Pu-Pu Platters is located just one floor lower.

...and given the water supp... (Below threshold)

...and given the water supply you'll need to visit here again just an hour later.

DIY water recycling... (Below threshold)

DIY water recycling

"...and you said Mike Rowe ... (Below threshold)

"...and you said Mike Rowe wouldn't even touch this one?"

The coaches kept telling th... (Below threshold)
Jeff Blogworthy:

The coaches kept telling them to "get the lead out of their butts"...

Update: <... (Below threshold)
Kevin Author Profile Page:

Update: Winners announced. Click the link to read the winning entries. The contest is now closed.






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