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Wizbang Weekend Caption Contest™

It's Friday, which means it's time for the Wizbang Weekend Caption Contest™. Enter your best caption for the following picture:

Democratic vice presidential candidate, Sen. Joe Biden, D-Del. greets supporters after a campaign rally at Muhlenburg College in Allentown, Pa. Thursday, Oct. 30, 2008. (AP Photo/Rich Schultz)

Winners will be announced Monday morning.

Update: Winners announced. Click the link to read the winning entry. The contest is now closed.


TrackBack URL for this entry:

Comments (139)

Pull my Finger!... (Below threshold)
Pretzel Logic:

Pull my Finger!

Somebody find me a 7-11 ..q... (Below threshold)
Pretzel Logic:

Somebody find me a 7-11 ..quick!

How's my hair look?... (Below threshold)
Pretzel Logic:

How's my hair look?

Crowd:"Oh my God h... (Below threshold)
Pretzel Logic:


"Oh my God he's not wearing any pants."

If you think she looks craz... (Below threshold)

If you think she looks crazy, wait till you see conservatives once we get elected.

They've had to hustle Biden... (Below threshold)

They've had to hustle Biden off to an undisclosed location. Just like Cheney!

They're gonna test Obama by... (Below threshold)

They're gonna test Obama by seeming to elect John McCain. You're going to think we did the wrong things.

But, you've gotta stick with us.

"Ladies, Ladies, there is m... (Below threshold)
Ray H.:

"Ladies, Ladies, there is more than enough of me to go around, but that guy needs to go see Foley in Florida if he wants some"

Biden. Because when you rea... (Below threshold)

Biden. Because when you really want to be about change, you go for one of the oldest coots in the Senate!

"Wait, is that Barbara West... (Below threshold)
Pretzel Logic:

"Wait, is that Barbara West over there?'

Looks like Mr. Aneurism is ... (Below threshold)

Looks like Mr. Aneurism is back!

The democrats were electrif... (Below threshold)

The democrats were electrified when Obama selected Joe Biden to be Vice President. He was hugely popular as a Presidential candidate, garnering almost 1% of the vote.

Why was I the first one in ... (Below threshold)

Why was I the first one in my family to be able to leave the coal mines?

Because I was willing to plagiarize my way to success!

How did he do such fantasti... (Below threshold)
Baron Von Ottomatic:

How did he do such fantastic gaffes with such little feet?

I think Obama picked me bec... (Below threshold)

I think Obama picked me because I'm just as articulate as Neal Kinnock.

And I'm clean.

Biden - "If you dont vote f... (Below threshold)
retired military:

Biden - "If you dont vote for the black guy than you are racist".

For the last time, I'm smar... (Below threshold)

For the last time, I'm smarter than you are.

Biden - " Dont listen to he... (Below threshold)
retired military:

Biden - " Dont listen to her (Lady behind him), I dont know what she is talking about. I would never take the opportunity to cop a feel in a crowd like this"

I'm perfectly willing to se... (Below threshold)
Baron Von Ottomatic:

I'm perfectly willing to sell my soul, and you say Lucifer is sitting right over there?

Whoa. Whoa, WHOA!!! Who wr... (Below threshold)

Whoa. Whoa, WHOA!!! Who wrote these questions? SECURITY!! Get the name and affiliation of all these reporters...

Our ticket is the choice of... (Below threshold)

Our ticket is the choice of Muslim radicals everywhere.

What's that tell you?

It means we have broad appeal!

Hey! I said I was going to ... (Below threshold)

Hey! I said I was going to get some pancakes at Annie's, and don't try to stop me!

Share the wealth, my ass! ... (Below threshold)
Baron Von Ottomatic:

Share the wealth, my ass! Which one of you pinheads took my wallet?

I don't know what that Joe ... (Below threshold)

I don't know what that Joe the Plumber was going on about. He doesn't make $250,000.

And once we're elected, he never will!

First we're going to stop t... (Below threshold)

First we're going to stop the oil companies from drilling. They we're going to tax the bejesus out of them.

Then we're going to nationalize them, because they're too inefficient.

"Who the hell let that guy ... (Below threshold)

"Who the hell let that guy right there in here?"

Obama's not a Marxist.... (Below threshold)

Obama's not a Marxist.

He just believes in redistribution of the wealth and state ownership of the means of production.

Woman over right shoulder:<... (Below threshold)
Pretzel Logic:

Woman over right shoulder:

"No, don't pull his finger!"

Barack really believes in h... (Below threshold)

Barack really believes in helping the needy and the downtrodden.

Unless it's his own half brother or his aunt, and it's gotta come out of his own pocket.

"You said open bar this way... (Below threshold)

"You said open bar this way?"

The Messiah?No, no... (Below threshold)

The Messiah?

No, no, no. Inside the campaign, we're asked to refer to him as the "Twelfth Imam".

Why are you asking me that?... (Below threshold)
geo Author Profile Page:

Why are you asking me that? Is this a joke? I did NOT say that!

Things got ugly when the NO... (Below threshold)

Things got ugly when the NOW delegation discovered that Biden had the last stash of Botox in California.

Fox News just captured a ph... (Below threshold)
Maggie Mama:

Fox News just captured a photo of the female ventriloquist who is actually speaking for Biden in an attempt to keep him gaffe-free until Election Day.

Mark my word! We're giving ... (Below threshold)

Mark my word! We're giving tax cuts to all middle income Americans. That's every American making, uh um, let me check,...this lady here has the latest amount...less than Family Dollar. That's it a dollar a family.

"Brains....brains! Must...... (Below threshold)

"Brains....brains! Must...eat...brains..."

"Stop! I'm Joe Biden and I'm gonna say it, again because it's very important - stop!"

"Braaaaa...oh. Never mind."

The attack that Sen Joe Bid... (Below threshold)
Noam Notkidding:

The attack that Sen Joe Biden predicted would come in the first six months of the Obama administration arrived early as he found himself surrounded by a pack or angry PUMAs.

(minus the extraneous comma... (Below threshold)

(minus the extraneous comma)

"I said, I have to get my m... (Below threshold)

"I said, I have to get my mouth open a little more to get the other foot in!" Biden screamed at a deaf supporter."Oh..God love ya man, I didn't see the hearing aid."

"I didn't blow the election... (Below threshold)

"I didn't blow the election!!!! It was racism!!! Racis...aaarrrggghhhh!!

Joe and a supporter both re... (Below threshold)

Joe and a supporter both recoiled in horror as an unscripted question was asked, knowing it would lead to another gaffe.

Lady over right shoulder: ... (Below threshold)
Mac Lorry:

Lady over right shoulder: Look at the disgusting crap on his back. Looks like the BS is coming out of both ends.

Mr. Wonka! I mean, Sen. Won... (Below threshold)

Mr. Wonka! I mean, Sen. Wonka! I have a golden ticket!

Biden "I will be glad when ... (Below threshold)
retired miliitary:

Biden "I will be glad when the election is over so I can stop going out among the unwashed masses."

Biden "I am glad Barrack is... (Below threshold)
retired miliitary:

Biden "I am glad Barrack isnt here. If he were then we would have a whole bunch of black people here."

Biden " I dont care what th... (Below threshold)
retired miliitary:

Biden " I dont care what the lady behind me says. I am not her baby's daddy"

When his campaign bus broke... (Below threshold)

When his campaign bus broke down just outside a Junior League Hockey Rink, Biden's worst nightmare was realized.....

Senator! Senator! I want to... (Below threshold)

Senator! Senator! I want to Gird Your Loins!

AP BREAKING: As Obama enter... (Below threshold)
rodney dill:

AP BREAKING: As Obama enters a campaign event. Joe Biden and an identified woman shout, "I want your baby!"

Biden: "Hey Palin, I got yo... (Below threshold)
rodney dill:

Biden: "Hey Palin, I got your Real America right here, 'Crazy Ladies for Obama.'"

"SERENITY NOW!!!"</p... (Below threshold)
rodney dill:


Screw Joe the Plumber, I ta... (Below threshold)

Screw Joe the Plumber, I talkin' to Mandy the Masseuse.

An identified female minimu... (Below threshold)

An identified female minimum wage earner reacts to Sen. Biden's calculations of her tax liability under the Obama economic plan.

OMG! Logic and reason! RUN ... (Below threshold)

OMG! Logic and reason! RUN AWAY!

Sen. Biden: "Hillary's ove... (Below threshold)

Sen. Biden: "Hillary's over there. And honestly, she'd be a much better VP candidate than I could be."

Sen. Biden's "minder": "What he actually said was that Hillary's a great help to the ticket. Just look at all these PUMAs looking for a piece of the action."

C'mon guys you call this pr... (Below threshold)

C'mon guys you call this protection? This is the third time today this one has gotten this close. What if next time she has a can of Nair?

Woman on left: "He's the fa... (Below threshold)

Woman on left: "He's the father of my baby!"

Biden: "I never saw this woman before in my life. Security!"

woman: "Sir! Sir! Have you ... (Below threshold)

woman: "Sir! Sir! Have you registered to vote? Just sign anything."

No, no, I'm not Murtha! Pl... (Below threshold)
DJ Drummond:

No, no, I'm not Murtha! Please noooooooooooooo!!!

I always use the ladies res... (Below threshold)

I always use the ladies restroom.

Throngs of Hee-Haws overwhe... (Below threshold)

Throngs of Hee-Haws overwhelm Uncle Joe when he announces, "I'll personally put a chicken in every one of your pots and even cook it too"

Sorry about that , miss. N... (Below threshold)
Mark L:

Sorry about that , miss. Now for my next gaffe. . .

Senator Biden yells for mor... (Below threshold)

Senator Biden yells for more sanitary wipes after being surrounded by the Scranton faithful.

I know it looks like we're ... (Below threshold)
Jeff Blogworthy:

I know it looks like we're not doing the right thing, but just trust us!

Hey cool - I think he's wea... (Below threshold)
Jeff Blogworthy:

Hey cool - I think he's wearing "Che" underwear!

"Sorry Lady, but open-toe s... (Below threshold)

"Sorry Lady, but open-toe sandals in a crowd this size is bound to lead to disaster....."

As Biden's hand slides into... (Below threshold)
A Stoner:

As Biden's hand slides into her skirt, he says "Help me, that woman is sexually abusing my hand."

Kill him!... (Below threshold)
Jeff Blogworthy:

Kill him!

No wait! Really - I swear -... (Below threshold)
Jeff Blogworthy:

No wait! Really - I swear - I just wear this pin for show!

Help! Zombies!!... (Below threshold)

Help! Zombies!!

In the final days of the ca... (Below threshold)

In the final days of the campaign, the big name celebrities were appearing with Obama, while Biden drew "B listers" Jerry "The Beaver" Mathers and a Barbra Streisand impersonator.

Broad appeal?... (Below threshold)

Broad appeal?

"Senator Biden, Senator Bid... (Below threshold)

"Senator Biden, Senator Biden! Can you co-sign on my mortgage loan? Senator Biden!"

You want a scary face to ca... (Below threshold)

You want a scary face to carve into a pumpkin?
Try her's.
Not scary enough?
Try Mine.

"Okay guys, my Depends are ... (Below threshold)

"Okay guys, my Depends are working overtime, so which way to the little boy's room?"

Joe "The Plumber" Biden... ... (Below threshold)

Joe "The Plumber" Biden... And Away Goes Troubles Down The Drain.

Senator! Senator!! Will you... (Below threshold)

Senator! Senator!! Will you answer my unscripted question with a gaffe or not?

For she said to herself, "I... (Below threshold)

For she said to herself, "If I may but touch his garment, I shall be whole". But Joe turned around, and when He saw her He said, "Daughter, be of good comfort; the One hath made thee whole."

Senator Gaffetastik's minde... (Below threshold)

Senator Gaffetastik's minder calls out in an attempt to regain the Senator's attention before he can respond to the unscripted question from the audience.


The mob scene turned even u... (Below threshold)
La Mano:

The mob scene turned even uglier when Joe Biden told the crowd that cosmetic surgery 'on demand' would not be available in Obama's universal health care proposal.

PANTS HIM!!!... (Below threshold)
La Mano:


The campaign had this extra... (Below threshold)
Joe Miller:

The campaign had this extra head grafted onto my shoulder to tell me when to shut up.

Where's my hasenpfeffer??? ... (Below threshold)

Where's my hasenpfeffer??? GET IT NOW!!!

For Halloween, Joe Biden pe... (Below threshold)

For Halloween, Joe Biden performs his rendition of "Thriller".

Performing the Vincent Price narration - Nancy Pelosi.

I TOLD YOU TO SURROUND ME W... (Below threshold)
kbiel Author Profile Page:

I TOLD YOU TO SURROUND ME WITH PEOPLE FROM THE NATIONAL PRESS. Not these local press yahoos who ask me impertinent questions.

Vice Presidential candidate... (Below threshold)
La Mano:

Vice Presidential candidate Joe Biden created quite a scene while speaking at "The Clock is Ticking" women's conference, when he responded "neither" to the contemporary question, "Boxers or briefs?"

When botox goes bad...... (Below threshold)

When botox goes bad...

I've got tax increases at $... (Below threshold)

I've got tax increases at $125,000 over here. Anyone want to go $120?

"I didn't really say there ... (Below threshold)

"I didn't really say there would be a terrorist attack within 6 months of an Obama win. See, she said it. She must be a ventriloquist."

Get. Off. My. Foot. Moron!<... (Below threshold)

Get. Off. My. Foot. Moron!

"OK, nobody move! I lost a ... (Below threshold)

"OK, nobody move! I lost a hairplug!"

Lady: "Oh my god! I just st... (Below threshold)

Lady: "Oh my god! I just stepped in a Biden-ism!"

"This is my 'Deer in the He... (Below threshold)

"This is my 'Deer in the Headlights' costume!"

A desperate and exasperated... (Below threshold)

A desperate and exasperated Obama supporter pleads with Biden to just 'Shut the Fuck-Up' already.

Secret Service guys, help m... (Below threshold)

Secret Service guys, help me out here! Coulter's trying to bite my finger!

Man in "Joe Biden" Hallowee... (Below threshold)

Man in "Joe Biden" Halloween costume ridiculed and chased out of town.

Biden: I'll have what she's... (Below threshold)

Biden: I'll have what she's having. What flavor Kool-Aid was it?

HE'S MELTING!... (Below threshold)


Crowd: Go Biden! Go Biden! ... (Below threshold)

Crowd: Go Biden! Go Biden! Go Biden!

Biden: Hey, they're shouting "Joe Biden" at me!

Crowd: No, we're telling you to GO, get out, scram!

THAT FINGER TOUCHED OBAMA! ... (Below threshold)


Obama's prank of lacing Bid... (Below threshold)

Obama's prank of lacing Biden's clothes with experimental pheromones worked all too well.

Botox... not... holding... ... (Below threshold)

Botox... not... holding... up...

Mark my words: We will WIN ... (Below threshold)

Mark my words: We will WIN and we will DESTROY the country.

Roosevelt never got crowds ... (Below threshold)

Roosevelt never got crowds like these, not even when he went on TV!

"You must be playin with Yo... (Below threshold)
dead voter #9:

"You must be playin with Your own dingaling."

"As a matter of fact, anyon... (Below threshold)

"As a matter of fact, anyone in this room would make a better Vice President than me!"

"...and did you get a look ... (Below threshold)

"...and did you get a look at Sarah Palin's suit the other night? Those little suits she wears drive me wild! In fact, I had to gird my loins...!"

"Don't tell anyone, but we ... (Below threshold)

"Don't tell anyone, but we already have a code name for the crisis I was talking about. It's going to be called 'The BARACKY UNITY HORROR SHOW!'"

(lady yelling behind Joe)<b... (Below threshold)
Ken in Camarillo:

(lady yelling behind Joe)
So Joe!
Which is it: 250K, 200K, or 150K before you redistribute my income?

When Joe Biden asked the cr... (Below threshold)

When Joe Biden asked the crowd to do their best Howard Dean scream, he had no idea the woman behind him would do a far better impression than his own...so he had her killed.

Biden: "And this is the fin... (Below threshold)

Biden: "And this is the finger that went into Barack's nostril to remove the obstructing booger!"

Female Fan: "Where is the Holy Booger?"

somebody get my parasitic t... (Below threshold)

somebody get my parasitic twin a sandwich - she's hungry!

C'mon Mr. Biden those nice ... (Below threshold)

C'mon Mr. Biden those nice men in the white suits and the butterfly nets are here.

Lady: And what would you do... (Below threshold)

Lady: And what would you do if you had a brain?
Biden: IIIIII'd unravel every riddle...

Hey Bill She says she is a ... (Below threshold)
William Chappell:

Hey Bill She says she is a friend of Monica's, She's giving me her phone number "now what do I do"!

The Obama campaign panicked... (Below threshold)

The Obama campaign panicked when it realized Senator Biden was making a frenzied attempt to slip his handler's leash

Woman: "COMMIE!"B... (Below threshold)

Woman: "COMMIE!"


No, really, she's scarier t... (Below threshold)

No, really, she's scarier than I am!

The first person to ask me ... (Below threshold)
Jeff Blogworthy:

The first person to ask me a hard question gets a full background check. Comprende?

Bravely bold Sir Biden rode... (Below threshold)

Bravely bold Sir Biden rode forth from Camelot.
He was not afraid to die,
O brave Sir Biden.
He was not at all afraid to be killed in nasty ways,
Brave, brave, brave, brave Sir Biden!

He was not in the least bit scared to be mashed into a pulp,
Or to have his eyes gouged out and his elbows broken,
To have his kneecaps split and his body burned away
And his limbs all hacked and mangled, brave Sir Biden!

His head smashed in and his heart cut out
And his liver removed and his bowels unplugged
And his nostrils raped and his bottom burned off
And his pen--

Biden: That's... that's... er... enough music for now lads. Looks like there's dirty republicans afoot

I can answer one question! ... (Below threshold)
Jody C:

I can answer one question! Make it quick, Obama is right behind me!

I said the dingos got my ba... (Below threshold)

I said the dingos got my baby!

"Again, the 3 letter word i... (Below threshold)
PapaRay Author Profile Page:

"Again, the 3 letter word is J-O-BS"

Invasion on the booby snatc... (Below threshold)

Invasion on the booby snatchers.

Biden - "What the hell do ... (Below threshold)
retired military:

Biden - "What the hell do you mean you gave my Senate office away!!!!"

"OK folks, the Obama middle... (Below threshold)

"OK folks, the Obama middle class tax cut auction will begin for those making under $250,000. Yes! Do I hear under $200,000? Yes! How 'bout under $150,000?......SOLD! The Obama middle class tax cut will be for those making under $42,000!"

"If you make under $150,000... (Below threshold)

"If you make under $150,000 your taxes will not go up a single dime.....It'll be more like thirty thousand dimes."

"Read my lips. More new ta... (Below threshold)

"Read my lips. More new taxes!"

"Of course I always lie whe... (Below threshold)

"Of course I always lie when my lips are movin'"

"They've had me locked up f... (Below threshold)

"They've had me locked up for the last week. Can you have that clean, articulate black boy get me something to eat?....OOPS!"

"You're wasting your time i... (Below threshold)

"You're wasting your time if you expect to be healed by touching my suit!"

"Three words! Get off my b... (Below threshold)

"Three words! Get off my back!"

"Are you kidding me? What ... (Below threshold)

"Are you kidding me? What kind of question is that? The only Marxists I like are Groucho, Harpo and Karlo."

Campaigning is a lot like p... (Below threshold)

Campaigning is a lot like picking up women at a bar.....after 2:00 AM!

"I'm telling you, 'taxes' s... (Below threshold)

"I'm telling you, 'taxes' should not be a four letter word!"

Woman: "LeeeeROY JENKIN... (Below threshold)
rodney dill:

Woman: "LeeeeROY JENKINS !!!"

HHGTTG entry for Joe Biden:... (Below threshold)
rodney dill:

HHGTTG entry for Joe Biden: Mostly Harmless

For the last time, I'm NOT ... (Below threshold)
Gary Russell:

For the last time, I'm NOT Bob Barker!

Update: <... (Below threshold)
Kevin Author Profile Page:

Update: Winners announced. Click the link to read the winning entry. The contest is now closed.






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