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The Death Card

Well it looks like the cat who took "30 days or less" in the How Long After The Inauguration Until The Race Card Is Played office pool can pocket the kitty. A confluence of two unrelated yet equally loaded-with-tragic/horrific/comic-irony events is transformed into allegory surrounding a misfit chimp dying for Nancy Pelosi and Harry Reid's sins. Or something. As insulting as linking the noble chimpanzee to Congress' plunder of $1 trillion dollars might seem, what's apparently really insulting is insinuating the POTUS might be a chimp.

That's just not cool now that the President is black.

"Your dad used to be smart as a monkey, but then his mind started gettin' lazy, and now he's dumb as a chimp" - Grampa Simpson
For eight years a Bush Sr. imitator uttering those words to the twins would have elicited riotous laughter and applause. Now, you're being fitted for a klan robe before the truth has a chance to get out of bed. All your comments better be doubly or triply scrutinized for any hidden vestiges of racism.

It's bad enough the massive supplemental spending bill just passed isn't universally popular. Even the thought that someone, somewhere laughed at President Obama depicted as a flinging-stimulus-cash-like-it-was-poo chimp would just just break the man's heart. And America needs a strong, respected leader in these troubled times.

Again in an unrelated confluence, newly-minted Attorney General Eric Holder decided to weigh in on the never-touchy subject of race. We're a nation of cowards when it comes to discussing race relations. Quite silly, really, until he explains to whom it's directed.

What does he want from white people in the discussion? And what topics are whites prohibited from discussing? When will we know we've had a suitable number of discussions on race with our black acquaintances? What's the end game for whites?

Or is it a message to people who reflexively hide behind the race card when data and facts run afoul of perception and desired outcomes? A call for dialog on race rather than soliloquies about racism? Without calm, rational assessment and discussion from both sides what's the point? Once the race card is played it's a death card for reasoned conversation.

My old bird dog ate off the table twice. The first time she was corrected firmly, yet fairly. The second time I whupped the tar out of her. She was pretty much a coward when it came to eating off the table after that. Years of drawing the race card has a similar effect - any potential reward isn't worth the beat down.

I get it. White folks can never get it. Blacks know whites will never get it and won't let whites live down the fact they'll never get it. And white folks know blacks know white folks will never get it and don't want blacks to know they know. It's all such a sorted affair.

Which is shameful. America just elected its first black President. We need a dialog on race now more than ever. Just leave our noble kinfolk the great apes out of it. They're too hilarious as secret agents and Clint Eastwood sidekicks in their own right to sully with comparisons to the braying jackasses and lazy grasshoppers in Washington.

Does anyone have strong feelings for pigs, skunks, weasels, buzzards, locusts, or termites? It shouldn't be difficult to proactively identify some loathsome - yet non-racially charged - non-humans suitable for association with Congress and the President to help circumvent any future allegorical confusion. My contribution to furthering the conversation on race - let's insult everyone equally regardless of race, gender, sexual orientation, disability, and religion.

Save your race card for someone who's obsessed over race.


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Comments (7)

It shouldn't be difficul... (Below threshold)

It shouldn't be difficult to proactively identify some loathsome - yet non-racially charged - non-humans suitable for association with Congress and the President

Weasels. Or rats. Because at least weasels (some) have fur worth turning into nice clothing items.

Yeah- rats. Wherever they go, they bring misery and pestilence. Kind of like the United States Government.

"We need a dialog on race n... (Below threshold)

"We need a dialog on race now more than ever."

Can't say that I agree with this statement anymore. Statements like the one that came from Holder indicate to me he is a man of little introspection and even less intellect (and maybe character). Sad he is the highest ranking law officer in this country.

Sorry, j Jones, but we can'... (Below threshold)

Sorry, j Jones, but we can't use rats. Remember when the Dems went apeshit (oops, forgive my "racism") when they claimed George W Bush subliminally used the word 'rats' in an ad?


Cockroaches - nope, there's... (Below threshold)

Cockroaches - nope, there's a make sexual reference there
Slugs - slimey, no back bones, but unfortunately there are a few sports teams here on the West Coast named after them
Skunks - Pepe le Pew is funny and these folks aren't
Seagulls - Now here's an opportunity that isn't used often enough - they are noisy, dirty, frequent landfills and garbage dumps, are bullies, and impossible to get rid of

bryan,Is that the ... (Below threshold)
Baron Von Ottomatic:


Is that the best you've got? I beat my highly-strung bid dog when she was young, the rest of her life she was well mannered and obedient?


The promise of a post-racia... (Below threshold)

The promise of a post-racial presidency was just as phony as all of Obama's other promises.

"Reverend" Sharpton and his... (Below threshold)

"Reverend" Sharpton and his homies will never, ever move on. Hope and Change flies in the face of their agenda. Obama is even worse because secretly he loves every minute of it.






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