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Wizbang Weekend Caption Contest™

It's Friday, which means it's time for the Wizbang Weekend Caption Contest™. Enter your best caption for the following picture:

U.S. Secretary of State Hillary Clinton speaks during a news conference at the Association of Southeast Asian Nations (ASEAN) Regional Forum in Phuket July 22, 2009. REUTERS/Sukree Sukplang

Winners will be announced Monday morning.

Update: Winners announced. Click the link to read the winning entries. The contest is now closed.


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Comments (113)

And now I would like to spe... (Below threshold)

And now I would like to spend a few moments discussing our present stance with Kim Jong Il of North Korea. In this Power Point presentation, as you can see over my right shoulder............

"Actually I was hoping to g... (Below threshold)

"Actually I was hoping to give the same message to North Korea."

Secretary of State Clinton ... (Below threshold)

Secretary of State Clinton rolls out the new State Department motto for US diplomatic relations with Thailand.

"It's what Bill would do."<... (Below threshold)

"It's what Bill would do."

Next stop: Skrou Emm, North... (Below threshold)

Next stop: Skrou Emm, North Korea

So when I asked Obama for g... (Below threshold)

So when I asked Obama for guidance on his foreign policy, he said, 'F**k it', and here I am.

Secretary Clinton insists t... (Below threshold)

Secretary Clinton insists that word is pronounced "foo-kay"...

"Yeah, and that's pretty mu... (Below threshold)

"Yeah, and that's pretty much how I feel about the whole Obama administration..."

Bill Clinton phucking loves... (Below threshold)

Bill Clinton phucking loves going to Phuket Thailand.

"Okay, it's time for lunch.... (Below threshold)

"Okay, it's time for lunch. Anybody know where we can get some Chinese food?"

I see Hillary and the word ... (Below threshold)

I see Hillary and the word Phuket behind her and all I can do is shudder in horror at the subliminal mixed message.

I'm here to Bang... I'm mea... (Below threshold)

I'm here to Bang... I'm mean see Bangkok.

Shortly after the passing o... (Below threshold)

Shortly after the passing of the Taco Bell dog, Phuket Bell unveils it's newest mascot.

Hillary gives a visual demo... (Below threshold)
retired military:

Hillary gives a visual demonstration of the proposed Obamacare legislation.

Hillary is in Phuket to res... (Below threshold)

Hillary is in Phuket to research the Thai sex industry. Especially the cute ones.

Audience member - "I wish h... (Below threshold)
retired military:

Audience member - "I wish her larynx was broken instead of her elbow"

"On the other hand, just Ph... (Below threshold)

"On the other hand, just Phuket."

Audience member "Stupid Ame... (Below threshold)
retired military:

Audience member "Stupid Americans. How can they be suprised when Bill cheated with a young overweight intern"

Hillary's disatisfaction wi... (Below threshold)

Hillary's disatisfaction with her low profile is starting to come to the surface in subtle ways...

Thailand invites all the in... (Below threshold)

Thailand invites all the international losers here.

Hillary - "Let me be very c... (Below threshold)
retired military:

Hillary - "Let me be very clear. I did not have sex with that man, Bill Clinton"

One audience member to anot... (Below threshold)
retired military:

One audience member to another - "Tell me again why the republicans are so opposed to abortion"

Hillary - "No President Oba... (Below threshold)
retired military:

Hillary - "No President Obama did not send me here to ensure his personal supply of blow will not be interupted."

Hillary - "and let me be ex... (Below threshold)
retired military:

Hillary - "and let me be extremely clear. The CIA nor the US military should not be allowed to kill our enemies, or detain them during a time of war."

Hillary - "Well President B... (Below threshold)
retired military:

Hillary - "Well President Bush is gone. Do you love us now?"

Never has there been a Secr... (Below threshold)
Lindy R. Dole:

Never has there been a Secretary of State more in need of this place.

"Where da white women at?"<... (Below threshold)

"Where da white women at?"

Hillary accidentally addres... (Below threshold)
retired military:

Hillary accidentally addresses the international sex workers convention.

The PlanPhase 1: Giv... (Below threshold)

The Plan
Phase 1: Give Hillary the wrong Reset button.
Phase 2: Break her elbow so she misses out on the first international crisis
Phase 3: Send her to Phuket and Bangkok for photo ops

Obama 2012 Re-election Plan complete.

Phuket, Phuket, Phuket, Phu... (Below threshold)

Phuket, Phuket, Phuket, Phuket, Phuket, OK boys now try to say that 5 times as fast as you can!

Im turning japaneseI... (Below threshold)

Im turning japanese
I think Im turning japanese
I really think so

"I have apologized for Amer... (Below threshold)
Maggie Mama:

"I have apologized for America over and over again but I'm still stuck in Phuket."

Our Administration has peop... (Below threshold)

Our Administration has people all across the world saying Phuket. Of course it is spelled differently from one culture to the next...

Obama sent the pantsuit to ... (Below threshold)
Baron Von Ottomatic:

Obama sent the pantsuit to Phuket
Carrying watery canards in a bucket
She said with a grin
As Myanmar shipped Jung Il's nuke parts in
"As we told Israel, you can suck it."

"Sometimes she looks like a... (Below threshold)
geo Author Profile Page:

"Sometimes she looks like a primary schoolgirl and sometimes a pensioner going shopping."

Kim Il

A turd in the bucket...Moth... (Below threshold)

A turd in the bucket...MotherPuhket

After reading the lefty blo... (Below threshold)

After reading the lefty blogs commenting about Michelle Malkin and ping pong balls, I will not lower myself and go down that road and say anything about Hillary's expression and being in the orient. Just say'in.

Sec. State Clinton explains... (Below threshold)

Sec. State Clinton explains the reason for her husband's confusion and disappointment regarding the city's name.

Hooked on Phonics - It take... (Below threshold)

Hooked on Phonics - It takes a village edition

Yes Barack, I made the spee... (Below threshold)

Yes Barack, I made the speech in Phuket. It's right next to Phukyou. Bye now.

Hey, glad to be here! Joe B... (Below threshold)

Hey, glad to be here! Joe Biden tells me the surfing here is SPECTACULAR!

I'm not gonna say it... you... (Below threshold)
Jeff Blogworthy:

I'm not gonna say it... you say it.

Hillary will say it. She'll say anything.

...and lastly, I apologize ... (Below threshold)
Jeff Blogworthy:

...and lastly, I apologize for your city's name. I'm sure we had SOMETHING to do with it.

"Just like at a sports even... (Below threshold)

"Just like at a sports event... let's all do the wave."

Dammit, people, first the r... (Below threshold)

Dammit, people, first the reset button debacle, and now this. The sign was supposed to say "Phukyu, North Korea"

Phuket? Bangkok? What is it... (Below threshold)
Jeff Blogworthy:

Phuket? Bangkok? What is it with you people?

The Thai people and I have ... (Below threshold)
Jeff Blogworthy:

The Thai people and I have much common ground regarding the environment. We all love things that run on batteries.

When I awoke the morning th... (Below threshold)
Jeff Blogworthy:

When I awoke the morning the first thing I did was check to see if I still had a kidney! Ha ha ha ha!

Clinton tried to conceal he... (Below threshold)

Clinton tried to conceal her disappointment and hoped the conference would at least wind up soon enough for her to make it to Monaco in time for the Grand Prix.

I thank the Thai people for... (Below threshold)
Jeff Blogworthy:

I thank the Thai people for this wonderful gift of ping pong balls.

Hillary makes a visit to pa... (Below threshold)

Hillary makes a visit to pave the way for Bill's endorsement deal. They believe Bill will be the perfect spokesman for the city's new tourism advertising drive centered around the slogan "If you get a chance, Phuket"

It only got worse for Hilla... (Below threshold)

It only got worse for Hillary, the next Southeast Asia stop was in Immah Laos

I love Thai men because the... (Below threshold)
Jeff Blogworthy:

I love Thai men because they have such small penises. It's almost like not having one at all. That is our goal for men in the United States as well.

"Yes, my accomodations are ... (Below threshold)

"Yes, my accomodations are very nice. I'm just to the left of the David Carradine Suite, just across from the Gary Glitter Room."

"As a little girl, I dreame... (Below threshold)
Maggie Mama:

"As a little girl, I dreamed I was Anna whirling around the room with the King of Siam."

My motto has always been "E... (Below threshold)
Jeff Blogworthy:

My motto has always been "Everything tastes better with peanuts." Ask anyone.

Unfortunately, Joe Biden wa... (Below threshold)

Unfortunately, Joe Biden was barred from speaking at this stop.

"No respect, I tell ya. I ... (Below threshold)
P. Bunyan:

"No respect, I tell ya. I get no respect..."

"It's great to be here. You... (Below threshold)

"It's great to be here. You won't believe
the sniper fire I had to dodge to make it
to this podium."

President Obama had a simil... (Below threshold)

President Obama had a similar sign at his recent press conference: "F*ck You, America"

There once was a woman in P... (Below threshold)

There once was a woman in Phuket
Whose husband often says "suck it."
And she said with a grin
As she wiped off her chin,
"If Thailand's got cunt, He will Phuket."

"How did this town get its ... (Below threshold)

"How did this town get its name? Was Bill here before me? I guess not. Then the name would be Phuker!"

"I'm sorry. When I agreed t... (Below threshold)
Dodo David:

"I'm sorry. When I agreed to bring my husband with me, I had no idea that he would take this city's name so literally."

Thats one pantsuit Billy wi... (Below threshold)

Thats one pantsuit Billy will never spew on!

Off subject - Who are the p... (Below threshold)

Off subject - Who are the putzs that vote negative? I'm guessing the same two putzs that vote the opposite of the rest of us every time. That's okay, but this is a caption contest. Oh, PHUKET.

Phuket, I don't know anythi... (Below threshold)

Phuket, I don't know anything about an arrest in Cambridge.

Hookered on Phonics... (Below threshold)

Hookered on Phonics

I just bought stock...You j... (Below threshold)

I just bought stock...You just saw me buy stock...raallph, raallph. Aw! Phuket.

" Unwaddable "... (Below threshold)
Joe the plumbdinger:

" Unwaddable "

I would't phuk that with Ob... (Below threshold)

I would't phuk that with Obama's dik.

I'm not wearing a necklace.... (Below threshold)

I'm not wearing a necklace. My wrinkles have formed a union!

"Aw phuket! ..It depends on... (Below threshold)
Joe the plumbdinger:

"Aw phuket! ..It depends on what the meaning of jizz is?"

"...and when you come to th... (Below threshold)

"...and when you come to the US, we'll make sure to included Toad Suck, Arkansas on your itinerary."

"As you know, President ... (Below threshold)
DJ Drummond:

"As you know, President Obama has traveled the world to apologize for America. This has made it necessary for me to travel the world to apologize for President Obama."

I wouldn't Phuket with your... (Below threshold)
a. moral:

I wouldn't Phuket with yours!

" I've talked to long. I kn... (Below threshold)

" I've talked to long. I know who you all came to see. You all know who this banner is for, so...without further ado, I would like to introduce president Obamas Czar to the UN...Wanda Sykes!!! C'mon out Czarina!!!!"

Not in Chicago to restore t... (Below threshold)
Anon Y. Mous:

Not in Chicago to restore the Hope,
Not at Yale to confound the Dope.
Not in DC on a bet,
Not in NY to pay a debt.
Not in Arkansas on a rip,
Not in Thailand on a trip.
I will not Phuket here nor there,
I will not Phuket anywhere.

In a major change in foreig... (Below threshold)
Princess Bernie:

In a major change in foreign policy, Secretary of State Clinton abandons the "Reset Button" approach in favor of the "Phuket" approach while gesturing with three fingers and stating, "Read between the lines."

This job is hard! Phuk-et,... (Below threshold)

This job is hard! Phuk-et, I'm going to Thailand: all the charm of Southeast Asia, with a sprinkling of Daytona Beach douchebaggery.

Well, I started to bring Bi... (Below threshold)

Well, I started to bring Bill, but he found out many of the prostitutes had penises and backed out.

I'm thrilled to be back in ... (Below threshold)

I'm thrilled to be back in the country where as a young man, I had the surgery that made me the woman I am today.

There once was a girl from ... (Below threshold)
Dave Williams:

There once was a girl from Nantucket...

In case anyone cares, it's ... (Below threshold)

In case anyone cares, it's pronounced poo-ket, and commonly mispronounced by tourists as foo-ket.

But it sure is funnier to mispronounce it as an F-bomb. :)

The "Where in the world is ... (Below threshold)

The "Where in the world is Hillary Clinton" game is a hit with members of the press corps. Players can score points by correctly identifying the country in which the Secretary toils at any given time.

"Well I did once get to Cli... (Below threshold)

"Well I did once get to Climax.... Michigan with Bill. I'd wanted him to go to Beaver Lick.... Kentucky with me but he backed out, Couldn't even get him to French Lick..... Indiana. I would've settled for Intercourse... Pennsylvania, but we didn't get there either. So there was no way I was going all the way to Blowhard.... Australia with him. Finally I had to settle for Dildo..... Newfoundland, Canada. I guess I should've known that Bill wouldn't settle for Blue Ball... PA."

"I hate this phuking job".<... (Below threshold)

"I hate this phuking job".

"So Hu is in China, Il is i... (Below threshold)

"So Hu is in China, Il is in the hospital, and I don't give a Phuk!"

"Oh he's in the White House".

Whom ever is in charge of '... (Below threshold)

Whom ever is in charge of 'backdrops', I'm going to have your ass!

Could've just as easily bee... (Below threshold)

Could've just as easily been Cankleland as Thighland

When I told Bill I was goin... (Below threshold)

When I told Bill I was going to Phuket, Thailand, he just smiled and said "Been there, done that".

"It says what behind... (Below threshold)

"It says what behind me!? Aw shi......"

Obama phuks America.. I phu... (Below threshold)

Obama phuks America.. I phuk Thailand.

Devil in a Bluedog dress... (Below threshold)

Devil in a Bluedog dress

In all honesty, I have noth... (Below threshold)

In all honesty, I have nothing against this Woman. Shes probably a nice Person if You have to live with Her?

I am just having fun at Your exspense Hillary. Sorry, love Jeff

Phuket, I'm tired of this g... (Below threshold)

Phuket, I'm tired of this gig. I'm here to announce Hillary! is back in 2012!

Sorry for the Freudian slip... (Below threshold)

Sorry for the Freudian slip.. "She's probably a nice Person if Youhave to live with Her."

Ha ha lol

A carryover from the Bush a... (Below threshold)

A carryover from the Bush administration, the advance team that brought us 'Mission Accomplished' is hard at work at the State Department.

I asked the president where... (Below threshold)

I asked the president where he wanted me to go next. He thought for a minute and said "Phuket, go to Thailand." So here I am.

"Tell you what, I'll just w... (Below threshold)

"Tell you what, I'll just wait until you juvenile pricks get all the jokes out of your system, then we can proceed with the press conference, OK?"

"You know, for the longest ... (Below threshold)

"You know, for the longest time, I couldn't figure out what they meant by F*ck it Island..."

Media-hound Obama is giving... (Below threshold)
Maggie Mama:

Media-hound Obama is giving more than ten exclusive interviews a month. Poor Hillary is forced to search for cities with double entendres names -- the only way to grab a little attention or perhaps a caption contest or two.

It's great to be here today... (Below threshold)

It's great to be here today in Pawtucket .... What? I'm where? S***, Obama has just Phukked with me for the last time.

Hillary again demonstrates ... (Below threshold)

Hillary again demonstrates her "Schoolgirl" diplomacy by reciting the Korean alphabet in the wrong country.

Hillary glances down at her... (Below threshold)

Hillary glances down at her WWBD (What Would Bill Do) bracelet and shakes her head.

Phuket? I don't even know i... (Below threshold)

Phuket? I don't even know it!

"You just gotta laugh it of... (Below threshold)

"You just gotta laugh it off...Bill and I were in such a rush getting out of the house that he grabbed my tickets to Bangkok and I grabbed his...well, I ended up here."

Since its a small "Bill" I ... (Below threshold)
914 Mary jo We love You:

Since its a small "Bill" I will pay! ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha

"...and I would like to ext... (Below threshold)

"...and I would like to extend warm wishes from your new sister city in America -- Stripmenakedsmothermeinwhipcreamandlickitoff, Mississippi.

Thailand was heard to reply... (Below threshold)

Thailand was heard to reply, "Not even with someone else's wang."

Why am I in Phuket Thailand... (Below threshold)

Why am I in Phuket Thailand? Where else can I express how I feel about working in this administration... F**k It!!!

"This reminds me of the tim... (Below threshold)

"This reminds me of the time when Bush visited Bratilava, I guess paybacks are a me."

"I was looking at the sign ... (Below threshold)

"I was looking at the sign behind me and it reminded me of one of Bill's favorite sayings:
'If it's got a pulse and two X chromosomes...'"

Update: <... (Below threshold)
Kevin Author Profile Page:

Update: Winners announced. Click the link to read the winning entries. The contest is now closed.






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