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So you want to be a Massachusettes Senator

Well it's down to the last week of the special election campaign for The Glenlivet Memorial seat in the United States Senate. Improbably, a Republican is within spitting distance of the Democrat for a statewide seat in Massachusettes. Brown is closing on Coakley according to several polls, and there's a lot of anecdotal evidence being reported about the enthusiasm of the Brown campaign as they sprint toward Tuesday's vote.

Ah, the delicious irony of Massachusettes voters handing "Ted Kennedy's Seat" to a Republican and breaking the Democrats' filibuster-proof majority. Maybe, but color me skeptical and pessimistic as hell. There's just no way I can get too emotionally invested in the idea of a Brown victory. The Democrats' stranglehold on the Bay State is just too strong, Democrats outnumber Republicans by a 3 to 1 margin, and now that the race has tightened Democrats are cranking up the machine.

Throw in the Obama appointees running Justice and I just can't conceive of a way Coakley doesn't get dragged across the finish line with a surprisingly large margin of victory. Not trying to rain on any parades here, but I've seen it and come away disappointed too many times.

Admittedly, Coakley has run a terrible campaign. Running out the clock in a state where it's almost impossible for a Democrat to lose. Forced to actually campaign over the past two weeks, she shown awful political instincts and a sense of entitlement to "Teddy's Seat". There's no doubt she's vulnerable, but this is Massachusettes we're talking about. A Democrat can drown a bitch in Massachusettes and the voters will send him to the Senate for the rest of his natural born life. She may not be a Kennedy, but she hasn't actually killed anyone either. So she's got that going for her.

Not too long ago Texas elected a Democrat, Ann Richards, as Governor against all odds and popular wisdom. Texas is to Republicans what Massachusettes is to Democrats ever since 1980. Hell, LBJ's political machine even had to steal Texas for JFK back in 1960 although that may have been more of a Baptist/Catholic thing. LBJ, now there was a Democrat we don't talk enough about. If you're appalled at Reid's comments about Obama then LBJ's private ruminations on race would make your testicles re-ascend back into your body. Or your ovaries drop like testicles. YMMV.

While I'm off on a tangent here, yesterday I mentioned the happiest man on Earth - George W. Bush. Now I don't know if any of y'all caught it, but he was at the Cowboys game in Arlington last Saturday. They showed a shot of him on NBC before the game sitting in a box next to Emmitt Smith. Fast forward in the game a bit, and as the camera is zoomed in on the pile after a play...all of a sudden this huge bullfighter cheer roars out in the stadium. After a few seconds of puzzled silence, Al Michaels says, if you're wondering about the cheering they're showing Emmitt Smith on the big screen. Well yeah, Emmitt and W. Al couldn't get his head around the fact that Bush would get a standing ovation from ~100,000 people. The guys on local sports radio were totally bagging on Al over it.

We like Bush here in Dallas. Another reason to love or hate the Cowboys, Dallas and/or Texas.

Where I'm going with all this is that Texas is a very red state. A Democrat winning a major state-wide office is pretty much unheard of anymore. So how did Ann Richards pull it off? Well, she was running against a wealthy west Texas oilman by the name of Clayton Williams. Republican, self-made millionaire, pilot of what may be the greatest slow-motion train wreck campaign of all time.

Disclaimer - it took me a couple of years of searching to find a couple of mint condition Clayton Williams for Governor bumper stickers, my old '82 F250 4x4 is festooned with one. I'd buy a couple more if anyone has any ratholed anywhere. Looks sweet next to the Long Live Longnecks sticker.

Clayton was up 20+ in the polls once the candidates were decided. All he had to do was run out the clock and he'd have waltzed into the Governor's mansion. Which means George Bush wouldn't have defeated Ann Richards, and wouldn't have then gone on to the White House. Reason number one I searched high and low for those bumper stickers.

Poor Clayton was kind of like Ross Perot if Ross Perot had worked all his life in an oil field instead of a white collar environment. Think a less refined Jerry Jones. Claytie's having some kind of off-the-record shindig at one of his spreads and it starts to rain. So he comments,

Rain is whole lot like rape. You can't do anything about it, so you might as well sit back and enjoy it.

Reason number two for those bumper stickers. The sheer gut-wrenching dog's nuts crazy shock value of Clayton Williams. It may drive someone to vote Democrat for all I know but it's so worth it for those priceless looks I get from some dingleberry driving a Prius sporting Obama and COEXIST stickers.

Of course, I get that look at the next light once they catch up after I've blown by and given them a little taste of the 351w and Magnaflows.

That's the kind of insanity it's going to take for Brown to pull this out. Massachusettes is just too liberal and too reflexively Democrat for Coakley to die by a thousand pricks. It's going to take a Chernobyl scale event. I'd love to see it, but can't shake the feeling it's a bridge too far.


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Comments (18)

It may be a wind turbine to... (Below threshold)

It may be a wind turbine too far, but do it for croakly.. Uncle pickled will love ya forevah!

I agree, a Brown victory s... (Below threshold)

I agree, a Brown victory seems to be a bridge to far. But it is fun to see the Dem's panic over what they thought was "fixed".

It's funny to watch them sc... (Below threshold)

It's funny to watch them scramble to protect a seat they consider a lifetime Democrat grant.
I'm not holding my breath though after what's happened recently with Acorn and the recounts they always seem to win when 'uncounted' votes magically appear.

You would think with the fr... (Below threshold)

You would think with the frickin numbers the dems have in power now something they believe in would be getting done? Besides a drive towards socialism that is. It appears they are not united. Its every power hungry fool for themselve's and were on the menu.

Would be nice to see all the rotten cod dumped right in Teddys favorite watering hole.. Lake Chappaquiddick!

Hey --- When Michaels said ... (Below threshold)

Hey --- When Michaels said they were cheering for Emmitt Smith, ONLY Emmitt was on the screen at that time. I was there. Get your freaking facts straight.

Maybe You were looking at a... (Below threshold)

Maybe You were looking at a different screen? Who cares? They both were well payed employees of Texas.

It's called RATTLING THE CA... (Below threshold)
Sir Toby Belch:

It's called RATTLING THE CAGE! And, win or lose, it's a victory!!!

I want Brown to win if for ... (Below threshold)

I want Brown to win if for no other reason than the Democrats would've done it to themselves. Remember, they changed the rules when Romney was governor to prevent him from appointing a Republican if Kerry won in '04. That's why we're here now. That's why the gutless Democrats tried to change the rules back when Teddy's time was clearly waning.

Regardless, the fact that Brown has come anywhere near Coakley in MA is amazing and no doubt spooking all those Dems in red states up for re-election this year.

Watch for a Big Scandal abo... (Below threshold)

Watch for a Big Scandal about Brown to be released on Friday, probably by the crack reporters at the Boston Globe, or some really sleazy campaign ad. It happens often enough that it gets to be predictable. Even odds.

What'll it be? A breathless ethics charge? A sexual harassment charge from that long hidden preschool incident with little Mary Finnegan? A blasphemous anti-Kennedy passage unearthed from a high school term paper? A whisper campaign that Brown is a secret heterosexual? He secretly bought some brownies at a 1975 Boy Scout bake sale with leftover 1995 campaign funds? If you listen carefully, you can almost hear the Democrat campaign machinery cranking up.

I sent Brown a campaign contribution from the Bobdog Foundation on Monday, which I almost never do. The trouble with Illinois politicians is they're already bought, so I might as well throw the money at Brown.

Anyway, I like this guy, although I agree it's a long shot. The closer the election, the stronger the message we send to Washington.

OK, so maybe Wayne Brady is... (Below threshold)

OK, so maybe Wayne Brady is going to have to choke a bitch, but I think it's a rather unfortunate choice of words here.

Clayton Williams - who atte... (Below threshold)
Mark L:

Clayton Williams - who attended Texas A&M University - inspired a new Aggie joke with his performance running for governor:

Q. How many Aggies does it take to elect a woman governor of the state of Texas?

A. Just one.

Of course the way Kay Bailey is running she may inspire a new one:

Q. How many senators does it take to elect an Aggie governor of the state of Texas?

A. Just one.

I agree that Brown winning ... (Below threshold)

I agree that Brown winning would be a longshot but Ma does vote in Repub Governors every now and then, much to my surprise.

Funny thing is, that Ma., completely infested with liberals, just might find Coakley a bit grating. My liberal friends in Ma are very sensitive folks and if Coakley comes across as less likable than Brown, they'll probably stay home or perhaps vote for Brown. A few years back, they voted in Romney instead of the liberal Shannon OBrien. OBrien came across as kinda nasty while Mitt was the friendliest poll around.

Liberals, being easily offended, just might find all of the recent attack/negative ads run by Coakley and the dems to be too nasty.

Also agree with Jim m about a last minute scandal. I doubt friday though. That's a slow news day. I'd expect it in the Sunday Globe.

Last thought....Brown could go negative is he wants. Coakley's career is not that stellar. Brown could highlight her bungling of a 2005 rape case involving a Somerville cop and a 23 month old niece. He could bring up her deal allowing the pedophile priest, John Geoghan a year of probation in a closed-door proceeding. Sure, 7 years later she prosecuted him for sex abuse of children but it was her earlier deal that allowed him to remain free for 7 years to continue his sex abuse. Then there's her treatment of Gerald Amirault, keeping him in prison long after it was clear he was innocent.

Brown really does have a lot to work with if he so chooses. These last few days should be interesting.

People, people - before you... (Below threshold)

People, people - before you get ahead of yourselves, do you really expect that in the end, there won't be enough votes for Coakley?

Let's not forget the 2004 Gubernatorial election in Washington, or the 2008 Senatorial election in Minnesota.

If the race is close, the Democrat machine will manufacture enough extra votes for Coakley to win.

re: 13Weegie, that... (Below threshold)

re: 13

Weegie, that may be true, but it is just possible that this time the electorate is steamed enough that when their votes are stolen they MIGHT take up some arms against the tyranny. I think that happened in MASSACHUSETTS once about 200+ years ago.

With a Chicago politician's... (Below threshold)

With a Chicago politician's appointee running Justice, Coakley should rest well at night.

Weegie's right.Rem... (Below threshold)

Weegie's right.

Remember how Minnesota's junior senator got to Washington.

Or Roland Burris.

Just because Massachussets ... (Below threshold)

Just because Massachussets generally elects democrats, doesn't mean the state is overwhelmingly liberal. The major urban areas maybe, but there a lot of other folks in that state that vote. There are a lot of very conservative people in the state that vote democrat for reasons other than being liberal. For some it could be traditon, for others party loyalty, some others a lack of better options than the democrat. As much as I loathe Ted Kennedy, did quality conservative republican candidates ever really run against him? Not just an option to Ted Kennedy, but anyone that would of truly been better for the state?

Finally, don't discount voter obstinancy. MA is in New England, and are Yankees in the best sense of the word. Brown might get elected because the voters are tired of being told they are to stupid to vote any way but for the democrat.

it is spelled Massachusetts... (Below threshold)

it is spelled Massachusetts






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