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Wizbang Weekend Caption Contest™

It's Friday, which means it's time for the Wizbang Weekend Caption Contest™. Enter your best caption for the following picture:

** CORRECTS SPECTER'S PARTY AFFILIATION TO DEMOCRAT ** Sen. Arlen Specter, D-Pa., right, meets with Supreme Court nominee Solicitor General Elena Kagan on Capitol Hill in Washington Thursday, May 13, 2010. (AP Photo/Alex Brandon)

Winners will be announced Monday morning.

Update: Winners announced. Click the link to read the winning entries. The contest is now closed.


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Comments (142)

"Well, with your view on fr... (Below threshold)

"Well, with your view on free speech... you'll be known as gaggin' Kagan."

"We've gotta defuse this si... (Below threshold)

"We've gotta defuse this situation before all hell breaks loose."
"... but there's only 20 seconds left MacGruber."

Okay, so this is how you... (Below threshold)

Okay, so this is how you do rock, paper, scissors when deciding a case. This is rock. I'll show you paper and scissors later.

No Senator, there is no suc... (Below threshold)

No Senator, there is no such thing as the "Judicial Party", so, no we don't need a senatorial candidate for Pennsylvania...

"Well of course we're gonna... (Below threshold)
Lindy R. Dole:

"Well of course we're gonna fling poo at you."

You like softball? Get me b... (Below threshold)

You like softball? Get me back chairing the judiciary committee and I'll show you some softballs.

Suprisingly, Kagan's gaydar... (Below threshold)

Suprisingly, Kagan's gaydar just went off.

As designer of the Clinton ... (Below threshold)

As designer of the Clinton Assault Weapon Ban I will not hold it against you if you do support the 2nd Amendment Sen. Spector. Besides, you'll switch that vote to like you changed parties if needed.

"Hello, I'm Napoleon."... (Below threshold)
Pretzel Logic:

"Hello, I'm Napoleon."

Incredibly, Specter tells h... (Below threshold)

Incredibly, Specter tells her he knows what it's like to be a lesbian, since he's done some carpet munching in his day too.

"Why, yes sir, we do carry ... (Below threshold)
Jim Addison:

"Why, yes sir, we do carry small pictures as wall treatments."

...not that there's anythin... (Below threshold)
Baron Von Ottomatic:

...not that there's anything wrong with that.

"You're the perfect choice,... (Below threshold)
Pretzel Logic:

"You're the perfect choice, so representative of the average American woman. Never married, no kids, you think boys are icky, killing babies at will...confirmation should be a walk in the park."

Ahhhh what I would give be ... (Below threshold)

Ahhhh what I would give be a candidate again that people don't know much about, with no history or voting record...

"I used to be a republican.... (Below threshold)
Pretzel Logic:

"I used to be a republican."

"Enough about me, what do y... (Below threshold)
Pretzel Logic:

"Enough about me, what do you think of me?"

At Yale, we always thought ... (Below threshold)

At Yale, we always thought you Harvard chicks were hawt!

"So how long have you been ... (Below threshold)
Pretzel Logic:

"So how long have you been on E-Harmony?"

Kagan smiles with the knowl... (Below threshold)

Kagan smiles with the knowledge that she won't have to humor this moron for too much longer.

Yeah, I don't see a telepro... (Below threshold)

Yeah, I don't see a teleprompter either, so we're safe from Obama for at least a little while.

"... and now let's get down... (Below threshold)

"... and now let's get down to the crux of your nomination Ms. Kagan. Perhaps you've heard that the President's softball team, the D.C. Radicals, finished behind Ryan's Raiders in the Capitol softball league standings last year...".

Become a Supreme Court Just... (Below threshold)

Become a Supreme Court Justice and you too can have your picture hung in the local Wendy's.

I would hope that a wise Le... (Below threshold)

I would hope that a wise Lesbian woman with the richness of her experiences would more often than not reach a better conclusion than a white male who hasn't lived that life.

All my nude photos of Supre... (Below threshold)

All my nude photos of Supreme Court Justices are in the back. Snort, snort.

I would hope that a wise La... (Below threshold)

I would hope that a wise Latina woman with the richness of her experiences would more often than not reach a better conclusion than another white Harvard female who hasn't lived that life.

Pa and Ma Kettle--... (Below threshold)

Pa and Ma Kettle--

"No it's Specter, Spectre i... (Below threshold)

"No it's Specter, Spectre is is a fictional global terrorist organization featured in the James Bond movies..."

"My Viagra collection? In ... (Below threshold)

"My Viagra collection? In the other room - but it won't help. Sorry."

Whenever anyone flips the l... (Below threshold)
Jeff Blogworthy:

Whenever anyone flips the light on, I have this overwhelming desire to scurry to a corner. How about you?

Have you ever read "The Exo... (Below threshold)
Jeff Blogworthy:

Have you ever read "The Exorcist?"

Hey it looks like I'm going... (Below threshold)

Hey it looks like I'm going to be out of a job soon could you use an experienced law clerk?

Arlen: "I used ... (Below threshold)


"I used to be a republican."

Elena: "I used to be a man."

"My God, we must be two of ... (Below threshold)

"My God, we must be two of the most unattractive critters to have ever walked this earth...."

What's your position on RIN... (Below threshold)

What's your position on RINO's vs DINO's?

Elena: "...well it all star... (Below threshold)

Elena: "...well it all started karoake night at the Whitehouse, after I finished singing, Obama said, 'I know Diana Ross, she's a friend of mine, and you're no Diana Ross, but you could be one of the ....'"

Let's just say hypothetical... (Below threshold)
Jeff Blogworthy:

Let's just say hypothetically that the envelope on the table contains a foreign bank account number in your name with a million dollars in it. Heh, heh, hypothetically speaking of course. What are the chances I could get a court order keeping me in the senate?

"I really envy those life l... (Below threshold)

"I really envy those life long SCOTUS appointments. Would you like to see my collection of campaign victory photos?"

I just loved your performan... (Below threshold)

I just loved your performance in The Birdcage.

"No, I don't think Justice ... (Below threshold)

"No, I don't think Justice Ginsburg has any interest in tickle fights."

They were all disloyal. I t... (Below threshold)
Jeff Blogworthy:

They were all disloyal. I tried to run the ship properly by the book, but they fought me at every turn. They laughed at me and made jokes... Ah, but the strawberries! That's, that's where I had them.

"So how you doin?"</... (Below threshold)

"So how you doin?"

Arlen: "It must be hard on ... (Below threshold)

Arlen: "It must be hard on you since Siskel died."

"...and don't pay attention... (Below threshold)

"...and don't pay attention to Ginsburg, you are allowed to wear clothes under the robes."

Is that Al Gore in drag?</p... (Below threshold)
Dave G.:

Is that Al Gore in drag?

" . . . and maam, someday y... (Below threshold)

" . . . and maam, someday you too can have an 'I Love Me' office like mine!"

I never imagined you with a... (Below threshold)
Dave G.:

I never imagined you with a pearl necklace.

"No, Elena, I don't know El... (Below threshold)

"No, Elena, I don't know Ellen DeGeneres or Martina Navratilova....Why..?"

Elena: "When I met with Oba... (Below threshold)

Elena: "When I met with Obama he said, he'd spoken with all eleven justices and received their approval, but I thought there were only..."
Arlen: "Yep, ...knows 'em just like he knows his states..."

I understand you're a switc... (Below threshold)

I understand you're a switch hitter too Senator.

Zelig makes the rounds on C... (Below threshold)

Zelig makes the rounds on Capitol Hill.

"... so, how's the wife?" ... (Below threshold)

"... so, how's the wife?"

"And once you are a supreme... (Below threshold)
Mark L:

"And once you are a supreme court justice you will have so many photo opportunities that your 'love me' wall will soon be even bigger than mine."

So what are your views on a... (Below threshold)

So what are your views on ancient Scottish law?

This "Solicitor General Kag... (Below threshold)

This "Solicitor General Kagan" character is some of your best work since Austin Powers and Wayne's World, really really funny stuff...

Take a good long look Ms. K... (Below threshold)

Take a good long look Ms. Kagan....this will be Pat Toomey's Senate office next year.

Senator Specter:<i... (Below threshold)

Senator Specter:

Ms. Kagan, just like Valerie Jarrett, You're one of those "who gets Obama"! You understand the "nature" of his work ... and I'm sure you already took the oath to be his eyes, ears and sounding board in the Supreme Court . . . Congratulations!!!
I wish you well :) Melek

"Why are we surprised when fig trees bear figs?"
-- Margaret Titzel

Spectre "Sorry I made that ... (Below threshold)
retired military:

Spectre "Sorry I made that "Release the Kagan" remark.

Proof that Kagan is farther... (Below threshold)
retired military:

Proof that Kagan is farther left than Spectre.

Kagan - "So have you plann... (Below threshold)
retired military:

Kagan - "So have you planned on how you are going to spend your unemployment insurance yet?"

Jack Klugman and Tony Randa... (Below threshold)

Jack Klugman and Tony Randall discuss the revival of their roles for "The Odd Couple Homecoming" made for TV movie.

Kagan - "No I dont want to ... (Below threshold)
retired military:

Kagan - "No I dont want to go out with you Senator, I'm gay"

Spectre - "No problem, I used to be a woman"

Kagan - "Sorry I'm gay"... (Below threshold)
retired military:

Kagan - "Sorry I'm gay"

Spectre - "well I used to be a woman"

Kagan - "Me too"

Spectre - "It is of the utm... (Below threshold)
retired military:

Spectre - "It is of the utmost importance we protect continued unemployment insurance"

Kagan - "Isnt that a conflict of interest for you considering Nov is a few months away?"

CORRECT SPECTOR'S PARTY AFF... (Below threshold)
Jeff Medcalf:


Spectre - "do you think I a... (Below threshold)
retired military:

Spectre - "do you think I am sexy"

Kagan - "Yes. BTW I'm gay"

Arlen: I knew a guy that co... (Below threshold)

Arlen: I knew a guy that could pull his peins this high.

Kagan: I can only pull my penis this far... and still can't see it over my belly


Kagan - "Senator, I feel th... (Below threshold)
retired military:

Kagan - "Senator, I feel that I need to let you know that I am gay"

Spectre - "Well I am pretty happy myself"

"So, Solicitor Kagan, I jus... (Below threshold)

"So, Solicitor Kagan, I just looked at the latest poll numbers for my primary next week. If I vote 'yes' for your confirmation this time, could I get a job as one of your law clerks?"

You do understand that with... (Below threshold)

You do understand that with Barry, loyalty is a one-way street? You get into a jam, well he's got this bus and...........

"Once you are on the SCOTUS... (Below threshold)

"Once you are on the SCOTUS you can change your positions just like I changed party.....however, you then do not face an angry electorate!"

(Giggles), "OH I KNOW!"

Kagan grimaced at the sight... (Below threshold)

Kagan grimaced at the sight of the Specter over her shoulder, as well she should. The senator had just declared that he felt a special closeness to her because he "swung both ways," but had then added "but only politically."

"Oh, it's Elena...not Pat..... (Below threshold)
geo Author Profile Page:

"Oh, it's Elena...not Pat..my bad."

Ms. Kagan: "Thank you for c... (Below threshold)

Ms. Kagan: "Thank you for coming by my office Mr. Spector, before we get started let me show you a couple of photos I have on the my "Wall of heroes," there's me and Hugo Chavez, and I got this one of me and Fidel Castro as he was going into surgery, look there's Sean Penn in the background putting rabbit ears on me....oh there is me and Kim Jong Il, I like that one because it actually makes me look taller than someone. But that wall behind you is of Our Dear Leader and I when we worked at the University of Chicago, I would take pictures of him when he was giving speeches, in the faculty lounge talking, when he was talking on the phone, when he was teaching. Most of the time he did not know I was even there...that one over there I actually fell out of the tree when he saw me taking a picture of him talking with Bill Ayers."

Sen. Spector: "I have a picture of Sean Penn too, he sent it to me when I wrote him a congratulations letter for winning the Oscar in Milk.....do you want to make out"

"It's important to keep ... (Below threshold)
DJ Drummond:

"It's important to keep a very open mind, Ms. Kagan. In addition to pretending to be a Republican, an Independent, and a Democrat, on the wall behind me you can see that I have also been a Communist, Socialist, a member of the SLA, N.O.W., Greenpeace - you get the idea.

You promise everything to everybody, then do whatever helps you the most personally."

1, I would have sworn it's ... (Below threshold)
Don L:

1, I would have sworn it's would be Hillary

2, You're lucky, cause after you screw up you'll never have to change parties.

3. Now you'll just have to swallow hard and keep saying this to everyone, until after you're sworn in: The constitution was designed to limit the government.

You know of course if I was... (Below threshold)

You know of course if I was still a Republican you would be toast, right?

OK, so right after the Sena... (Below threshold)

OK, so right after the Senate confirms you, I'll stand up and say "Release the Kagan!!". And that's your que to appear for the press conference.

Solicitor Kagan, with a pea... (Below threshold)

Solicitor Kagan, with a pearl necklace....I'm sure there's a joke there, but I'm not making it.

Qualified? Well, I do know... (Below threshold)

Qualified? Well, I do know all the words to "You Can't Hurry Love"

Specter: "I'm only gonna s... (Below threshold)
P. Bunyan:

Specter: "I'm only gonna say this one more time-- now ACT LIKE A LADY!"

Eilean Spinchter switches p... (Below threshold)

Eilean Spinchter switches parties just in time to be swept out in November.. As usual, the idiots timing is impeccable.

So, it's set -- you'll move... (Below threshold)

So, it's set -- you'll move to Pennsylvania, vote for me in the primary and then I'll vote for you. Agreed?

Dumb meets dumber... (Below threshold)

Dumb meets dumber

The supreme court nominee m... (Below threshold)

The supreme court nominee meets a twisted liberal.

Solicitor Kagan, w... (Below threshold)
Solicitor Kagan, with a pearl necklace....I'm sure there's a joke there, but I'm not making it.
It's appropriate she looks like June Cleaver, since they both like the Beaver.
"Welcome to the dark side, ... (Below threshold)

"Welcome to the dark side, your new name will be Darth Butch."

Elena: "Where da white wome... (Below threshold)

Elena: "Where da white women at?"

Arlen: "Actually Betty Whit... (Below threshold)

Arlen: "Actually Betty White was my first choice."

Can you get Rush Limbaugh e... (Below threshold)

Can you get Rush Limbaugh eliminated from that 1st Amendment thing?

Elena: "Surely the American... (Below threshold)

Elena: "Surely the American people will respect and accept me just the way I am."
Arlen: "Yea, I remember my first beer too... and don't call me Shirley." (rimshot)

There was no smoking gun ba... (Below threshold)
Steve Crickmore:

There was no smoking gun back then to help Chief Justice Warren, just a magic bullet, which I discoverd.

There was no smoking gun ba... (Below threshold)
Steve Crickmore:

There was no smoking gun back then to help Chief Justice Warren, just a magic bullet, which I discovered.

Ma'am, it takes a much thic... (Below threshold)

Ma'am, it takes a much thicker resume than yours to be elected to the Softball Hall of Fame.

"She is Clean, Articulate, ... (Below threshold)

"She is Clean, Articulate, and I do not think she is gay, she did not show any attraction to me at all."

Gee, I wonder how he'll vot... (Below threshold)

Gee, I wonder how he'll vote?

This is probably the only t... (Below threshold)

This is probably the only time in recorded history anyone has been to the left of Arlean.

Arlen: "If we screw this up... (Below threshold)

Arlen: "If we screw this up we'll all swing by the neck."
Elene: "Just as long as its both ways."

"Someday you may join the r... (Below threshold)

"Someday you may join the ranks of these other powerful men on this wall.."

"But I am a woman sir!"


Hello! I am Specter, a repu... (Below threshold)

Hello! I am Specter, a republicrat. ww

Spectacle: "Release the Kra... (Below threshold)

Spectacle: "Release the Kraken".

Ha ha ha, good one retired military.

Turnout was low on the firs... (Below threshold)

Turnout was low on the first day of auditions for the remake of "The Rocky Horror Picture Show."

"My Philadelphia constituen... (Below threshold)

"My Philadelphia constituents would like to know your views on the constitutional voting rights of dead people."

"Well, Senator, we still allow you to vote."

Arlen: (thinking) "I didn't... (Below threshold)

Arlen: (thinking) "I didn't know there was a female sex to the ManBearPig species."

Elena: (thinking) "HULK SMA... (Below threshold)

Elena: (thinking) "HULK SMASH!!!"

"Next my dear I will show y... (Below threshold)

"Next my dear I will show you my lingerie dominatrix playroom."

"Please do Ms. Kagan."

"Dick Cheney in drag... (Below threshold)
Roger McGaugh:

"Dick Cheney in drag."

Former RINO meets future JI... (Below threshold)
DJ Drummond:

Former RINO meets future JINO.

Hair club for men picks the... (Below threshold)

Hair club for men picks their poster boys for infirmity.

"Eeny, meeny, miney, moe is... (Below threshold)

"Eeny, meeny, miney, moe is acceptable for deciding court cases, so long as you stay away from the politically incorrect second verse!"

Two people who should have ... (Below threshold)

Two people who should have no shot at their next gig, but strangely still do.

Why does he get a say on wh... (Below threshold)

Why does he get a say on whos on the court? He aint gonna be around to live with the stupid ass decisions..

So, when my ass gets beat n... (Below threshold)

So, when my ass gets beat next week in the primary, can you help me move all these dang pictures? No seriously you got a truck or van maybe??

Well I'm glad a Republican ... (Below threshold)

Well I'm glad a Republican President picked you, ooh, wait, I mean I'm glad the President picked a Republican. Shoot, its all so confusing these days.

Yes, I "made" every appoint... (Below threshold)

Yes, I "made" every appointment on that wall.

"Just say what I say about ... (Below threshold)

"Just say what I say about party affiliation: I swing both ways!"

"You mean you DON'T like to... (Below threshold)

"You mean you DON'T like to get "softball" questions from reporters?"

"Well, you wouldn't be gett... (Below threshold)

"Well, you wouldn't be getting too much guff if you were one of those, you know, HOT lesbians."

Specter: "You're Kagan? I ... (Below threshold)
Dodo David:

Specter: "You're Kagan? I thought the President selected a woman to be the next Supreme Court justice."

Kagan: "That's OK, Senator. The last time you were re-elected, your constituents thought they were re-electing a Republican."

Is that a softball bat? or ... (Below threshold)

Is that a softball bat? or are you just happy to see me?

"You want me to pretend to ... (Below threshold)

"You want me to pretend to be your boyfriend?"

Specter says: "You can be f... (Below threshold)
Vivien Hibbert:

Specter says: "You can be flip because I'm already the flop!"

Arlent: "I prefer huskier r... (Below threshold)

Arlent: "I prefer huskier rotund candidates".

Surely you jest!... (Below threshold)

Surely you jest!

1+1 = malfeasance... (Below threshold)

1+1 = malfeasance

Specter - "So Rosie, when i... (Below threshold)
retired military:

Specter - "So Rosie, when is your next television show?"

I see dumb people!... (Below threshold)

I see dumb people!

Spector: "You remind me of ... (Below threshold)

Spector: "You remind me of another lesbian we had on the Supreme Court; Justice Souter".

Spector: "Some of your fema... (Below threshold)
Maggie Mama:

Spector: "Some of your female critics complain because you are not a mother; and some of my critics complain that I am a mother."

Kagan : So you got a senato... (Below threshold)

Kagan : So you got a senatorial career as reward for making up that ridiculous JFK magic bullet theory.

Arlen: Sweetie I also had to sell that load of crap with a straight face.

Dont ask, dont tell and for... (Below threshold)

Dont ask, dont tell and for goodness sakes dont run again Arlend!!!

Lee Ward's Pornography.... (Below threshold)
retired military:

Lee Ward's Pornography.

"I'm sorry, Senator; I don'... (Below threshold)

"I'm sorry, Senator; I don't know why I thought your name was 'Oral Sphinchter'".

"Would you like tuna, or oy... (Below threshold)

"Would you like tuna, or oysters for lunch?"

"So how long have have you ... (Below threshold)

"So how long have have you lived in the 'Gay' State? Er, ah, ibid, 'Bay' State?"

"You are as HOT as Justice ... (Below threshold)

"You are as HOT as Justice Ginsberg is!"

Bring in the clownsT... (Below threshold)
retired military:

Bring in the clowns
There out to be clowns
Never mind, they're here.

You know, I'll probably be ... (Below threshold)

You know, I'll probably be looking for a job this time next year. If I vote for you, do you think I could be your law clerk? It's just a little "Quid Pro quo" thing we like to practice here in D.C.

"What a coincidence! I'm a... (Below threshold)

"What a coincidence! I'm a switch-hitter too!"

So...in these wall pix...so... (Below threshold)
Sir Toby Belch:

So...in these wall pix...sometimes I'm facing
left, sometimes right. Don't let them pigeon-
hole you. If you moon the judicial panel,
remember, straight butt-on to the pool camera.

Elena is in awe of Arlen's ... (Below threshold)
Sir Toby Belch:

Elena is in awe of Arlen's walnut-cracking
abilities....but decides that sometimes you
feel like a nut, sometimes you don't.

Elena, 8 months pregnant, d... (Below threshold)
Sir Toby Belch:

Elena, 8 months pregnant, discusses the options
of late term abortion with an empathetic
Arlen. Specter was heard to say, "that's
what Pennsylvania is trying to do to me."

Update: <... (Below threshold)
Kevin Author Profile Page:

Update: Winners announced. Click the link to read the winning entries. The contest is now closed.






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