The Bonfire of the Vanities returns worse that ever! The motto this week is “Be Proud, Suck Hard“. All of this weeks entries have been gladdy offered up to the raging inferno that is the Bonfire…
If you want to be reminded to enter the Bonfire each week via e-mail, subscribe to the Bonfire mailing list. If you don’t signup you’re not allowed to whine about missing the deadline, however whining about missing the deadline is a good entry for the following weeks Bonfire; ironic isn’t it?
Remember there are no winners here, only losers. Anyway, it’s time for the show.
- Shelli treats us to blogging about talking on the phone. At least she has the decency to rub our faces it. Not quite up to toe porn standards, but still Bonfire material.
- Kelley search through here archives and found this stinker. She’s quite the vitriolic one isn’t she? Since it’s her first time here she can play the archive card, but next week we expect some fresh doo doo.
- Pete grouses about the vast conspiracy to steal all his good lines. Pete, you found us out – we’re ALL stealing from you.
- Adam posted this bonfire entry for two busy-body locals who found his blog. Readership-wise I’m still not sure how this is any different than his other posts.
- James notes that the Chicago Manual Of Style will be updated for the first time in 20 years. This is only relevant in the blogosphere if they address the proper use of phases like “fo’ shizzle my nizzle”.
- Jay’s family can’t decide if he’s a bitch ass punk or a punk ass bitch*** for whining about lunch at a Thai restaurant
- Paul appears to have slipped over the edge. First he shares a list of words he wishes he used more often, then he updates the post and uses all the words in a paragraph emulating a cheap romance novel. Perhaps a listing of the medications you wish you took more often would be in order?
- Jen is attempting to whore out the Bonfire for Navel Gazing Month™. Sound deviously logical to me, but what ever you do please do not visit her maddeningly cute post.
- Sean notes in this post that things are about as good as they are going to get for the week. This inspired bit of navel gazing causes traffic to his site to plummet, and rightfully so.
- Harvey is attempting to win the award for “Most Obscure Bugs Bunny Cartoon Reference.” The good news is the Secret Service is not on his tail anymore, the bad news is that the pun police are.
- Norbizness prematurely celebrates a move up the Ecosystem ratings by listing types of Australian marsupials. The gods of the Bonfire frown upon tempting the fates of the index spiders this way. Justice was served as his current standing is 1 link.
- Tiger regales us with tales of bowel movements and psychedelic drugs.
- Susie whines about having nothing to whine about. Then she whines about when people show up to the movies at her theater. Anyone else noticing a trend there?
- McGehee tries to explain the humor in a Lincoln assassination bit from a cartoon. I guess you had to be there