I heard on the radio earlier that Bill Clinton is going to be at our local Barnes & Noble Thursday night, signing copies of his book. I probably won’t get out of work in time to attend, but I’m toying with how I could properly recognize this momentous event.
1) Show up in a blue dress, black beret, and kneepads, and say I’d rather have a DNA sample than an autograph;
2) In accordance with recent trends, show up with a meringue pie and nail him with it;
3) Slip him a business card and tell him that if he needs a good lawyer to get his disbarment overturned, I’m his man;
4) Ask him to make the autograph out to “Ray Reggie;”
5) Ask him to make the autograph out to “Juanita Broaddrick.”
Again, the odds of me actually being able to get to the signing are negligible, and of me going are non-existent. This is strictly for fun. If you had a chance to attend a Bill Clinton book signing, what would you love to do?