Be on the lookout

For 130,000 inflatable breasts.

A men’s magazine has lost a shipment of 130,000 inflatable breasts en route to Australia.

The breasts, worth £100,000, were planned to be a free gift in Ralph magazine – but vanished before arriving at their destination.

A spokeswoman said the container left docks in Beijing two weeks ago but turned up empty in Sydney this week.

The magazine has put out an alert to shipping authorities but the breasts need to turn up in the next 48 hours to make the January issue.

Ralph editor Santi Pintado urged anyone with information to contact the magazine, saying: “Unless Somali pirates have stolen them it’s difficult to explain where they are.

“If anyone finds any washed up on a beach, please let us know. We want our boobs back.”

Would you settle for 535 members of Congress, the Olsen Twins, Brittney Spears, Michael Jackson, and Maureen Dowd?

That’s asking for too much.

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