When Google Isn't Your Friend

Ever heard the phrase “Google Is Your Friend?” It’s a shorthand way of saying that sometimes, even the most basic research — even a cursory Google search — can save you a whole lot of trouble.

Conversely, there are times when those most cursory searches can not be your friend. Particularly when you’re the one being researched.

Case in point: a journalist wants to write an article about “gun caching.” He wants to interview people who fear that upcoming events will be unpleasant, and are concealing weapons and ammunition in anticipation of future troubles. So he goes to a gun discussion board and asks if anyone will be willing to speak with him. He even promises them anonymity, if they’ll just open up.

Sadly for Mr. Baum, the members of the forum did treat Google as their friend — and found out he has a lengthy history of writing pro-gun-control pieces.

Reading the responses to Mr. Baum’s inquiry, it seems that the readership of that forum are incredibly stupid. They keep loading all their guns on boats, which then subsequently sink into lakes — leaving all those guns forever lost and unaccounted for. What’s worse, they can’t even learn the most basic lessons — many of them used the exact same model of boat, which sank in the exact same fashion.

And even those who didn’t use a boat ended up losing a great deal of weapons in other unfortunate, unforeseeable actions that left the firearms in question unaccountably and permanently lost. Such clumsy fools they are.

Mr. Baum seems to be having a great deal of difficulty getting people to open up about their plans or history of concealing caches of weapons, to be recovered in the case of emergency. I wonder why…

I've got your extremism right here
Madame Mis-Speaker