You may have noticed that Standard & Poor’s has downgraded the credit of the United States, which is why our left wing is now on fire.
Not to worry!
Moody’s has maintained our rating, so we should be just fine on one wing.
Now it’s true that everyone’s ticket price just went up, as well as the price on any loans or financial transactions you may have or undertake in the future.
We can prepare for this ‘New Reality’ by raising taxes now, to get you ready for the fact that you will have even less money than you do now. And of course, it’s very important that I, errr, the U.S. Government, continues to have enough “revenue” to meet its vital needs, which are whatever I tell you they are.
Just empty your wallets, give up your dreams, sign over your future, and enjoy the flight. I’m sure I will figure out this piloting thing before it’s time for you to re-elect me.