Saturday morning Kevin asked me to write something about “The Persuasionatrix.”
“I’m sure you haven’t seen it,” he explained (I hadn’t), “but there was a wannabe blogger fired today from the Cardin for Senate campaign in Maryland who went by the moniker ‘Persuasionatrix.’ She got fired for spouting off in a little bit too racist of tones and whining about Cardin’s skeevy friend groping her.”
First, I read the hot bits that Kevin had posted earlier. The story about the Oreos was in bad taste, but then so is most of the stuff on the Internet. And the post about her candidate’s friends having “Jewish noses” was questionable, too. If The Persuasionatrix is a Jewish “Oreo” herself, is she allowed to write that? You can call me many things, dear Wizbang readers, but racially insensitive I am not.
Next I did a few searches of “Persuasionatrix” and was disappointed to find only a few websites/blogs even mentioning her. I was disappointed because she wasn’t being berated by as many bloggers/journalists/columnists as I was when I lost my lowly job in Senator DeWine’s office. And all I did was blog about some of my dates. At least I’m not a racist! It just didn’t seem fair.
But then I had to check myself. My blogger instincts told me to tear into her, but the “at least I’m not a racist” argument reminds me of the joke where the shovel says, “At least I’m not a hoe!” I mean, it’s true, but the shovel is still just a shovel. (Also, shovels aren’t supposed to talk, so the shovel needs to STFU anyway.)
I think the main reason why The Persuasionatrix isn’t setting the Web on fire (as of Sunday afternoon, at least) is because it’s been done before–by me. And no one wants another one of me playing on “their” Internet. Also, she’s doing what everyone wants her to do: Hide in shame. Hopefully, Cardin’s campaign talked to Gruber and somehow convinced her to keep quiet until this blows over, i.e. Monday afternoon. And there’s really no incentive for her to come out anyway. No one is offering Gruber a book deal, a Playboy pictorial, or any kind of fun opportunities as far as I know. But if she feels that she has nothing to lose by coming forward, she should have some headshots taken to post on her new blog ASAP.
Jessica Cutler, whose well received first novel The Washingtonienne is still on sale, is hard at work on her second novel. Her weblog is at JessicaCutlerOnline.com.
I can’t believe this. Why is Wizbang giving “ink” to a vapid, morally vacant harpy like Jessica Cutler? And who cares, never mind Wizbang’s generally conservative readers, what she thinks about another publicity whore trying to get famous?
You guys are gonna need to hose down the blog with Clorox now…
Must….hold…back…too…many…jokes…
IRON-O-METER
||0————————-100||
^
|
My Iron-o-meter was supposed to read off-scale high, but I think it just collapsed like a planet in a black hole.
Seriously, though, if anyone followed the link to JessicaCutlerOnline.com, I’m kinda guessing this is one of Kevin’s little pranks. Well played, Kevin.
Obviously, Kevin is trying to mix it up to keep things fun. I now have posting privileges here, so expect to read more from me.
All right, Jessica, but I’m keepin’ my $400…
Who better to comment on Ursula’s blog folly? Really, Jessica was the logical first choice.
Hey, it’s your blog, Kevin…yeah, I can see somewhat your point…After stories of kinky illicit sex (which I approve, Jessica, lol) and a Playboy spread (girl, shaved, shower, I’m there…) yeah, all other wanna-be’s kinda pale.
Of course, you know, Lee will be here soon to say this is all a Rovian plot, and maybe, for once, I might be inclined to believe him.
Remember, you get what you pay for, Mr. Cloninger.