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No good deed goes unpunished

No good deed goes unpunished

December 24, 2004 Satire 5 Comments

I was thrilled when I saw Kevin’s Christmas Bunny contest. I figured it was a good chance to score some loot. Then I read the fine print — “Current authors or sponsors of Wizbang (and their families) are not eligible.”

Fine, then. Be that way. I don’t care. I learned a long time ago that being kind to strangers can come back and bite you on the can. I’m posting my cautionary tale in the extended section.

J.

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A little while ago I saw a friend of mine on a Monday morning. He had one hell of a shiner.

“Dave,” I asked him, “what the hell happened to your eye?”

“I was in church Sunday morning, like always. At one point we all stood up. That’s when I noticed that the lady in front of me had her dress caught in the crack of her butt. It didn’t look too comfortable, so I leaned forward and pulled it out. Then her husband turned around and slugged me.”

“Well, no wonder, Dave! Don’t EVER do anything like that again!”

“Oh, don’t worry, Jay. I won’t.”

The next Monday I saw Dave again, and he had ANOTHER shiner.

“Dave, didn’t you learn the first time? I told you not to do that again!”

“I didn’t, I swear!”

“Then what happened?”

“I went to church, just like before. The same couple sat right in front of me. Then, when we had to stand, I noticed her dress was caught in her butt again.”

“And you pulled it out again, didn’t you?”

“No! I left it alone, just like you said I should.”

“Then what happened?”

“Her husband reached over and pulled it out for her. But I knew she liked it that way, so I leaned forward and put it back.”

(OK, I know it’s an old joke, but at least I found a way to make it topical…)

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Jay Tea

5 Comments

  1. julie December 24, 2004

    If you want another example of no good deed going unpunished, just wait — Rumsfield went to Mosul.

  2. Laurence Simon December 24, 2004

    I take the opposite position on the Dead Pool Rules. Not only are the authors and families of authors allowed into the contest, but players are both encouraged to become authors and become family.

    I hear there’s a compound out by Waco that’s available for dirt cheap. All we have to agree on is declaring me the rebirth of Christ, and all will go smoothly.

  3. Smoke Eater December 24, 2004

    I’m not competing for money, I just think it’s a great idea to do something for someone else right now. If I can get my folks to agree, I’m going to try to get enough dinner to take it to my local FD later tonight, Lord knows they could use some relaxation being at work on Christmas Eve!

  4. firstbrokenangel December 26, 2004

    Yah, it wasn’t fair for you and I guess it didn’t really matter if anybody did anything good or not for it was more like playing BINGO – a number for every name and whichever number was picked and matched to a name was the winner. Actions speak louder than “random picks.”

    Cindy

  5. firstbrokenangel December 26, 2004

    Yah, it wasn’t fair for you and I guess it didn’t really matter if anybody did anything good or not for it was more like playing BINGO – a number for every name and whichever number was picked and matched to a name was the winner. Actions speak louder than “random picks.”

    Cindy